Stigmata

by L M Adams

  “Your… obstinacy became your comfort, your armor?”

  “Yes,” he whispers, “but the Wench,” he shakes his head, “the Wench has a way about her, able to get under a man’s skin.”

  I chuckle and take a sip of my wine, agreeing.

  “She walked around, always smelling like lust, the boys trailing after her like horny mutts with their little dicks all but hanging out.”

  “You were afraid they’d hurt her, like the men had hurt your mother.”

  He nods, “I had trained myself to control my lusts. I had learned how to sacrifice to keep her safe! I had earned her! Not them! They couldn’t love her, protect her – they only wished to possess her, and they would destroy her! I knew it… in my fucking bones I knew it.”

  “You made her promise no other men?”

  He nods, curtly, “She could have every woman in the world, but no men, they couldn’t be trusted!” He sighs, “It caused a strain in our relationship. She didn’t love me the way I had wished to be loved and the tighter I held her to me, the further she seemed to go. I went mad for a while with my desire to own her. I was filled with jealousy, and rage, and fear – toxic mess.”

  I watch him take a deep breath, calming himself.

  “If you hadn’t come along, I would have lost her again, I know that. Even after everything she went through with that evil bitch Sheba, I hadn’t changed, not really. She ran away, to another fucking world and all I could worry about was how many men I’d have to kill, or how far would I need to take her to get away from them all. You showed me… taught me how to love her… all of her, not just the parts I wished to claim. You showed me how to love a succubus. Not the way I loved her at first, on a pedestal, purely, you showed me how to love her darkness… and you showed me… all men aren’t bad, or evil or would hurt her.”

  He sighs, “You put up with me and my ways, quietly, patiently. Never seeming to get angry at how I made you second in her life.”

  “I never minded being at her feet as long as I could be with her.”

  “But you are a dominant man, I know that you have a mixed energy, but some way you put your own… ego to the side to do what was best for her. You showed me that I must do the same, not what I thought was best, but rather what she needed, and she needed you… I needed you. You helped me not hate myself so much and… be okay with enjoying my… kinks. I would not… Jaevia and I would not have made it without you.”

  “That’s nice of you to say.”

  He grunts, “After Hornigold, after that… when I was lost… when she was lost… the way you kept your shit together, kept us all together… me together. How you were able to keep it from all falling apart. Well, hell, Capaneus, how could I not love you? How could I not wish to call you my own? The rest… the rest just happened naturally… slowly. And I’m still uncomfortable with the parts…” he waves a hand between our cocks… “but that is not so important when you have a man’s heart and wish to give him your own.”

  He grabs my hand and holds it tightly, “I knew your road to me would be hard Capaneus, as was my road to Jae. It is hard to love the same thing that destroyed you… I should have found more patience in my heart…”

  “No,” I shake my head, “you had to give me what I wanted – so I could find what I needed. This had to happen the way that it happened… I wouldn’t have changed Lucien, I know me… and I wouldn’t have changed.”

  “Aye,” he nods, “perhaps. But I had no wish to hurt you like that, never like that. You have been hurt enough.”

  I don’t say anything, because I think he’d take it the wrong way. But sitting here, with him, like this – I have to acknowledge that all of my traumas from before prepared me for a life with Lucien and Jaevia.

  If my father hadn’t destroyed my chances of love with Matthias and Ariella… I would not belong to Lucien and Jae now. If I hadn’t been given as the tainted blood to Valentine, I would have never met Jae – if I hadn’t spent endless days and nights being trained by Némion… there’s no way I would have been able to survive Jaevia’s kind of love – there is simply no equation that doesn’t need my pain to give me this love.

  Perhaps it is an odd thing, but the bitterness of my life doesn’t taste so bitter tonight.

  118

  Jack – Solstice Morning

  “You seem anxious,” I say softly and pour him a glass of cool cream.

  “What?”

  “You’ve been pacing for ten minutes now… sit, eat,” I sit down and wave for him to sit across from me.

  Lucien was up before the breaking of the dawn I decided to get up with him. After getting, at most, two hours of sleep. Which means I’m grumpy. The sun isn’t even up, but it’s coming, I feel it coming. I had breakfast brought out to the patio, as is custom, but getting him to sit down and eat is a battle I wasn’t expecting… he is Lucien after all.

  “The magic is strange Capaneus, very strange and very powerful.”

  “The curse?”

  He nods, “Or perhaps not, or perhaps more… I feel the urge to… to…”

  “To sit down and eat?”

  This makes him stop finally and turn to me, “Ra take me, but you are a nag.”

  “It’s one of my finer qualities,” I smile.

  He huffs, but he sits down which helps to settle my nerves. He’s projecting into our link very strongly. This entire time we’ve been here, he’s been mostly cool and collected… even casual about meeting his father, but now the day is here, and all the anxiousness is rearing its ugly head along with the power of the Solstice, the longest day.

  “Hari?!”

  Like clockwork, Nassor is here. I still don’t like it, but I bite my tongue. This is a big day for Lucien, if never before, I need to put him and his feelings above my own.

  “Nassor, come.”

  The other man comes jogging up the garden side stairs. Smiling, a swagger in his steps as if he owns the world… that’s okay, he can own the world… but Lucien is mine.

  “Capaneus,” he smiles and bows towards me with respect, it throws me off.

  “Good… good morning.”

  “It is that, a fine morning indeed,” he comes over to the table and instead of sitting next to Lucien, as is his normal custom, he sits down beside me.

  He pours himself a large cup of Zobo juice and picks up the fresh flakey loaf of bread, tearing it in half and handing Lucien the other half.

  “The ride for the hunt will leave in an hour,” he turns to look at me, “will you be joining us?”

  I glance at Lucien, “Well I…” I clear my throat, “yes, yes I want to go on the hunt.”

  Nassor grins and nods, “Good, good… perhaps you will have a moment to show me the move you did last night.”

  Lucien huffs, “You are too slow for such a maneuver, the Bloodsucker is quick and nimble.”

  “Is that how he ended up claiming you?” Nassor grins, “being nimble,” he winks.

  “Not really,” Lucien chuckles low, “he does this thing with his…”

  I stand up and bang a fist on the table, “For god’s sake Lucien!”

  He holds up a hand, “I’m sorry,” he looks back to Nassor, “Capaneus is very shy about man-loving.”

  “He didn’t seem shy last night,” Nassor chuckles low.

  I sit down hard, feeling horribly lost, “Why do you have to… and he’s so… you’re all so…”

  Lucien raises an eyebrow, “What?”

  “… Blunt.”

  Lucien grunts, shrugs, and breaks off a piece of bread dipping it in the bowl of olive oil before plopping it in his mouth. The bowl doing nothing but making me remember how he bent me over right here and… and…

  Nassor elbows me, laughing… “We are only teasing you, yes? This is the way we…bond. Try it…”

  I huff, “That’s okay, he’s holding something for me and if he ever wants me to take it, he’ll get his shit together.”

  Lucien face falls, “Capaneus, I was only joki
ng.”

  “I’m not,” I raise an eyebrow in challenge.

  Nassor looks between us, “What is he holding?”

  I smile looking at Lucien and he looks away… I believe actually abashed.

  “A private matter,” Lucien mutters low.

  Nassor laughs, “I do not know what it is, but it seems the Bloodsucker has tamed the lion.”

  “You can’t tame a lion… not really,” I smile at Lucien, “but you can remind him who’s in charge… can’t you Lucien?”

  He nods, “Yes, Capaneus.”

  Nassor chuckles again, “Well done then, well done.”

  “In fact you should go Nassor, I need to remind Lucien of what he’s holding for me.”

  “Capaneus…” Lucien looks at me with shock.

  Nassor laughs as he stands, snatches Lucien’s unfinished bread from his plate and walks away. “One hour, do not be late!”

  I wait until Nassor is out of sight before I stand, “Come here Lucien.”

  “Capaneus…”

  “Now!” I snap.

  “I was only having a bit of fun…”

  I smile, “Now it’s my turn for… fun.”

  He sighs deeply but gets up from his seat and walks around the table to stand near me. I stand up to join him and he actually bows his head.

  “Now you wish to be good?” I ask, smiling a bit.

  He nods curtly.

  I brush my hand over the outline of his cock, and he whimpers for me; swaying on his feet.

  “The lust comes back with sick viciousness after being denied… doesn’t it?”

  He nods again, eyes still adverted.

  “Another session of tease and denial would break you quickly.”

  He takes in a shuddering breath, shaking his head no, “I cannot today, Capaneus, I cannot play your games today.”

  “You will if I wish you to.”

  He looks back to me, his eyes fill with flickering red fire, “I will end up doing something… regrettable.”

  “To the victor goes the spoils of war.”

  “What does this mean Capaneus?” He searches my features looking for… I’m not sure what.

  “It means – claim what you own.”

  He’s grabbing me by the back of my head and drawing me into a quick and vicious kiss before I can blink. He breaks the kiss just as fast, turning me to face the table.

  “Consent,” he begs as he begins untying my pants and yanking them down.

  “Please consent, please, please,” he bends me over and I feel him fumbling at his own pants, the heat rolling over him.

  He uses the olive oil to coat the both of us and I feel him move in tightly on the back of me, whimpering as I brace myself against the table. “Consent, please.”

  And I know if I denied consent, that would be the end of it. Odd how our kink, our experimentation into BDSM, has given me more power than I ever had as a ‘free man’ with my father. I’ve never felt this in control with any dominant… not even Jaevia.

  He kisses the healed scar my neck moaning. That was the only part of me that healed with supernatural speed, his mark – his claim to me and my claim to him. His lips upon it awakens something inside of me and I can feel the beat of his heart against my back.

  “Please,” he growls low, voice almost cracking with need.

  “Consent,” I moan, and he whimpers as I feel him push against me.

  I’m swollen, wanting to keep his scars also means no blood for healing my sensitive parts from our loving last night.

  “Slow,” I moan as he pushes forward.

  He breathes heavily and nods as I relax enough for the tip of him to slide into me. It hurts, being with him always hurts – but being without him would hurt more I’m sure.

  I know he’s trying to be careful, but he’s just too fucking big, and my head begins to swim with the pain. I can’t help but to try and find some way to cope with the pain and my mind has always reached for one place… Vayrá… and for the first time since being here… I feel her, really and truly.

  Perhaps the magic is different here… the connection – perhaps it needs to be a sacrifice of pure heart. I smile feeling the difference … the choice it is always about sacrificing with a free heart. Not with what you believe is freedom, but with true freedom, with joy in the giving. I forgot how to take joy in the giving. Since being here I’ve served, I’ve served because it was expected of me, because that is my function, because it was… me; but I forgot how to take joy in the giving. Lucien needs me, and I give unto him with joy.

  Lucien pushes into me again and I exhale as he slips into the core of me… into the center of me.

  He stumbles forward whimpering. I can feel his pelvis against my ass, grinding into the hidden depths of me… finally all of the way in.

  “Oh Ra,” he murmurs, “oh my love.”

  I push back from the table a bit and take his hand guiding it to me. His fingers wrap around my hard length and begin stroking gently as he makes love to me. No, he can’t fuck me this deeply like he would with Jaevia, he has to grind gently into my body, yet still I can feel his pleasure mounting, wishing to erupt.

  “Permission,” he moans.

  “No,” I whisper.

  He whines in his throat, but he doesn’t stop moving gently inside of me. Giving me a perfect blend of pain and pleasure, we make our own beautiful dance. And no, it will never be as intense as it is with Jaevia – but that doesn’t stop it from being special in its own way.

  He stops suddenly, holding inside of me.

  “Jaevia is here… do you wish to stop? Please do not make me stop.” His voice is strained with his struggle to maintain control.

  I shake my head no and squeeze myself around him, “Let her watch.”

  He whimpers and begins moving again, slowly… softly; wanting to please me. His strong hand stroking me is glorious. I reach back and dig a hand into his hair moving myself back on him wanting to drive him to the heights of insanity.

  His breathing becomes deeper, more primal as his pleasure mounts, “I’m going to come.”

  “Hold it.”

  “I cannot!” He screams and begins moving faster chasing an end to his beautiful misery.

  “Consent withdrawn.”

  His cock is out of me before I can draw in another breath. He lays his head on my good shoulder.

  “I beg, Capaneus, I’m begging for it. Mercy baby; give me mercy. I need to finish, I need a release,” his body is almost vibrating on mine as he tries to maintain control, always control, always he leans on it afraid to hurt us, afraid he’ll do to us what those men did to his mother.

  I could taunt him further, leave him in a state of perpetual need, but this is not the day for that, he needs to walk on sure footing knowing he is loved on a day like today.

  “Make me come and you can come.”

  He nods against me and I feel him push against my swollen rose. “Say it,” he begs me low.

  “Consent.”

  He plunges into me and wraps an arm around my throat at the same time. I cry out with pain as he grinds into me losing himself to the madness of his passions.

  “Be a good boy for me and come,” he growls low and my sack tightens.

  I close my eyes and let myself enjoy his dominance. Fuck, I let myself enjoy being choked out with an ass full of cock while getting jerked off. I let myself enjoy being me.

  He growls low, “Give it to me!” His arm tightens around my throat.

  I shake my head no.

  “No?” He hums, “Okay.”

  I’ve found the end of his patience… finally and the hate fucking begins, because I could come, I could give him this relief, I could… but I don’t… because yes I gave him my heart and yes I love him, but I am still Capaneus, Blood Lord and vampire and when I play a game, I play to win.

  I need him to lose control, I need him to know I can handle his worst – yes even still. Perhaps I am worth more than the pain I can take, but I still want him t
o know that there is no other like me.

  None.

  He impales me, forcing me up to my toes almost as he holds me to his body and grinds into my innards.

  “Please,” I moan.

  He tightens his arm, cutting off my air supply.

  “Give me what I own,” he whispers and fuck if I don’t come for him. My sack tightens and erupts with pleasure. He forces me face down on the table, takes hold of my hips and fucks me fast, but not deeply, not the way he did when he was raping me. Instead short fast strokes not meant to tear me apart but to force my prostate into submission and goddess if I don’t submit and scream and beg for him to stop as I take pleasure in how fucking good it feels for him to be him and me to be me. It’s different… better, because I gave him consent – consent to utterly destroy me for the viewing pleasure of our queen.

  I smell her lust and I feel her orgasm ricochet through our link. I can see through her eyes, watching the muscled flanks of Lucien tighten as he thrusts into me. She never gets to see him fucking because he would fuck no other but her… and now me; and Goddess Lilith is her witness… she loves it. Jaevia loves love for love’s sake. She loves fucking for fucking’s sake and she loves watching the loves of her life fucking most of all.

  “Do I have permission now?!” He demands, impaling me deeply. I lift up from the table to scream for him. He grabs me by the back of my neck and pushes my face back down to the hard stone. “Stay where I fucking put you!” He holds me down and gives me every inch, every last fucking inch… Blood King yes, let him fuck me to death.

  “Permission!” He roars, demanding his fucking due.

  “Granted,” I whimper.

  He groans low, sliding in and out of me slowly as he comes, coating my insides with him and I feel his pleasure join our link burning it with the joy of a god fucking his husband while his wife watches.

  119

  Jack – Jae Watches

  “I see you two have made up,” Jaevia murmurs, sounding extremely pleased.