by MJ Howson
“Nonsense. She’s beautiful. Just like our real Evelyn would have been.”
“I’m sorry, can you repeat that?” the voice assistant asked.
“Cancel,” Dawn said.
“You really need to change the assistant’s name,” Jacob said.
“I know.” Dawn continued to dance and sway with Eve. “I’ll call the technician tomorrow.”
Jacob turned his attention to the pile of menus scattered across the countertop. Having worked up quite an appetite with Carol, his stomach growled loudly. He said, “What do you feel like? Chinese? Italian?”
“It doesn’t matter to me. Get whatever you want. It’s just the three of us tonight.”
Jacob groaned and shook his head. He wondered if Dawn was going to place the doll at the dinner table. He glanced over at the white marble dining room set and was relieved to see there wasn’t a baby seat already in place. He looked at Dawn and said, “I hope you aren’t feeding it.”
“Of course not.” Dawn rolled her eyes and laughed. She stopped dancing and kissed Eve’s cheek. “Her mouth doesn’t open.” Dawn cradled the doll in her arms, causing Eve’s eyes to snap open. “But I do love talking to her.”
“As long as she doesn’t talk back.”
Twenty
A Pop of Color
Dawn gradually awoke from a long deep sleep. She lazily opened one eye and glanced at the ceiling. The black spherical projection clock showed the time to be 7:14 a.m. Dawn closed her eye and rolled to her side, allowing her mind to replay last night’s anniversary dinner with Jacob. Given the extravagant night out on the town for Dawn’s fortieth, they kept it simple and dined at the steak restaurant in the Spire. Jacob treated, much to Dawn’s objection.
The bedsheets still smelled of his cologne’s woody scent. Dawn stretched her arms out beside her, feeling for Jacob. As her fingers crawled across the sheets, she opened both eyes to find the bed empty. Dawn sat up and looked around, confused. The bathroom door opened, and Jacob emerged, fully dressed.
“Good morning,” Jacob said.
“Morning.” Dawn yawned as Jacob sat on the bed and kissed her cheek. “Are you leaving?”
“Clients in Jersey all day today. Remember?”
“Oh. Right.”
Dawn rubbed her temples. They’d polished off two bottles of wine at dinner last night, leaving the latter part of the evening a bit of a blur.
“I’m running late.” Jacob stood up and walked to the full-length mirror, and inspected the scar on his face. “I tried to wake you earlier, but you were totally out.” He went to the bed and sat beside Dawn. “You know who won’t let me leave.”
“What?” Dawn furrowed her brow as she stared at Jacob. He smiled a crooked grin and pointed at the ceiling. “Oh. Sorry. Evelyn, unlock the front door.”
“Front door is unlocked,” the voice assistant said.
“I went down earlier, but that digital deadbolt wouldn’t budge. Seems like a security hazard. What if you were in here unconscious?”
“The front desk can override it.” Dawn leaned forward and kissed Jacob’s scruffy cheek. She smiled as she recalled how wonderful the past two nights with him had been. “Thanks again for last night.”
“Happy anniversary.”
Jacob stood up and took Dawn by her hand. She flung her sheets aside and grabbed a knee-length black silk robe from the end of the bed. They left the bedroom, walked to the private elevator, and descended to the first floor. When they got to the front door, they stopped.
“My plan was to pay for dinner last night,” Dawn said. “I still owe you a gift.”
“Surprise me.”
Jacob leaned down and kissed Dawn. She relished the feel of his moist lips surrounded by rough stubble. Dawn ran her fingers through his gelled hair and rested her head against his chest.
“I can think of one thing,” Dawn said. “Something I should have done long ago.” Dawn looked up into Jacob’s eyes and said, “Evelyn, please grant Jacob Jilani guest access to my apartment.”
“What?” Jacob asked.
“Jacob Jilani now has guest access,” Evelyn said.
“Wow,” Jacob said. “What, exactly, does that get me?”
“It’s like a key to my place. You can come and go as you please. Evelyn will automatically unlock the door when you arrive and lock it when you leave. You can also do stuff like control the music and fireplace.”
“Thanks, Dawn.” Jacob smiled and kissed her fingers. He turned and opened the door. Once in the foyer he looked back and said, “I’ll call you later.”
Dawn waved goodbye and closed the door. The short robe wrapped around her was far too thin to keep her warm. Dawn glanced at the private elevator and then the spiral staircase. She quickly raced upstairs to the second floor and opened the door to the nursery.
The walls and furniture sparkled with blue and red twinkling stars. Dawn crept to the crib in the middle of the room to find Eve inside wrapped in a cotton blanket. The doll’s eyes were closed.
“Good morning, Eve,” Dawn said, gently brushing Eve’s curly copper hair. She reached down and picked the doll up, cradling it in her arms. Dawn kissed Eve’s forehead and left the nursery, taking the stairs to the top floor. As Dawn entered her bedroom, she said, “Evelyn, I’m ready to start my day.”
“Starting your day,” the smart home system replied.
The motorized floor-to-ceiling drapes opened, and soft jazz music began playing from the overhead speakers. Dawn placed Eve on the bed, propping the doll up against a pillow. She tapped Eve’s head to try to get the eyes to open, but they remained shut. Dawn gave up and walked to the closet.
“I’m sorry you had to sleep in the nursery last night,” Dawn said. “But Jacob doesn’t want you in the bed with us. I guess it’s safer that way, right?”
Dawn opened the twin doors of her wardrobe closet, causing the overhead lights to slowly illuminate. At 300 square feet, the wardrobe closet was larger than the average bedroom. Dawn began rifling through her collection of black, white, and cream robes.
“I gave him guest access to the place,” Dawn said. She stuck her head back out into the main room. “So, he might be staying here more often.” Dawn frowned when she noticed Eve’s eyes were still shut. “I hope you aren’t mad, Eve. I mean, we want Jacob to move in eventually, don’t we? It can’t just be the two of us forever.” Dawn turned her attention back to the racks of clothes. “That wouldn’t be a real family, would it?”
Eve’s eyes snapped open.
After reviewing her options, Dawn grabbed a long heavy white cotton robe from the rack. She ran her fingers through the thick fabric and wondered if it would be warm enough.
Suddenly, a thin child-like voice echoed quietly in the closet.
Wear some color.
Dawn looked around, confused. She glanced up at the overhead speaker playing music and shook her head, realizing it wasn’t the song or the voice of her smart home assistant. She sighed and said, “I . . . I guess I’m not fully awake yet.” Dawn walked back into the bedroom. She smiled when she noticed Eve’s eyes had opened. Dawn looked at the robe in her arms and said, “It wouldn’t kill me to wear some color. Would it?”
The closet’s mirrored back wall included two doors that led to a second hidden section. Dawn dropped the white cotton robe onto the floor and opened the other set of doors. The overhead lights popped on, revealing racks and shelves filled with a rainbow of clothes. The left side had upper and lower rods. Everything was grouped together - blouses, sweaters, skirts, and pants. The opposite side was packed with coats, gowns, and dresses of various lengths. Built-in drawers and shelves contained scarves, gloves, jewelry, and other accessories. The vibrant colors on display were in sharp contrast to the bland front half of the closet.
Dawn rarely stepped beyond the mirrored doors, and not due to her disinterest in color. The clothes in here came from her mother’s most prized collections. At her peak, Evelyn Easton dominated fashion runways across
the globe, her designs becoming envied and copied by many. Dawn always felt a bit intimidated, and perhaps even jealous, whenever she came face to face with her mother’s greatest achievements. Dawn never wore the clothes hidden back here, but every now and then would treat herself to a bit of jewelry.
The clothes were grouped by color. Dawn went to the far end of the long row of clothes where the colors were lightest. She flipped through several white garments. A white charmeuse full-length robe with bright blue basket flowers caught her eye. The funnel-like petaled flowers were clustered together in a few small areas lending the robe a kimono-influenced design.
Dawn slid the garment on, stopping to admire herself in the mirror. She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed. Her black roots were two-and-a-half inches long.
“Evelyn, remind me later to book an appointment to get my hair done,” Dawn said as she left the wardrobe closet.
“Setting a reminder for noon to book an appointment to get your hair done.”
Before leaving her bedroom, Dawn made a quick stop in her bathroom to get her sapphire pendant. She looked around, shocked at the mess. A pair of hair clippers sat on the vanity, with several attachments resting by its side. Hair clippings covered the floor and sink.
“Jacob,” Dawn said. She folded her arms and sighed. She’d bought him a set of clippers last Christmas so he could manscape whenever needed. “You couldn’t clean up, could you?”
The pendant from Jacob hung from a cabinet pull handle. Dawn grabbed it and held it against the blue flowers stitched into her robe. The colors were an almost perfect match. She glanced at the hair spread everywhere and returned the pendant to the handle.
Dawn went into the bedroom and picked up Eve. She left the room and took the private elevator to the main floor. When prepping the coffee maker last night, Dawn had added drops of vanilla extract to the water. The smell of freshly brewed coffee and vanilla bean greeted her as she entered the kitchen. Dawn poured herself a cup of coffee. She turned to Eve and said, “Let’s hit the studio.”
The first-floor den of Dawn’s apartment served as her art workshop. Unlike the sophisticated, sleek design of the rest of her home, this space looked unfinished. It was as if the construction crew closed the door and forgot to complete the room. The floors were bare polished concrete. The plastered walls were primed a dull flat white but never painted. The wall of windows lacked any sort of drapery or blinds. A small utility sink and counter sat beside a long set of closet doors.
The walls were riddled with picture hangers but otherwise bare. Stacks of paintings, wrapped in plastic, lay bundled together in the corners of the room. Some paintings were completed works of art, while others were half-finished. Dawn had stripped the walls bare shortly after her miscarriage.
Black metal easels, each holding paintings at various stages of development, were spread about the room. A few days after bringing Eve home from Zuni, Dawn had started a new project leveraging four-by-four-foot square black canvases as her starting point. High viscosity acrylic paints, in various shades of white, were her only choice of color. The thick paint created a buttery texture that highlighted her brushstrokes.
Her latest piece was an idea in search of meaning. Currently, the canvas was nothing more than two white humps. Were they hills? Breasts? Nothing? She wasn’t sure. She felt they most resembled hills but still hadn’t decided in what direction to take the painting.
Dawn placed Eve on a wooden folding chair away from her work area, twisting the doll’s articulating legs and feet into a steady position. The rubber soles on Eve’s tiny white leather shoes helped keep the doll steady. She glanced at Eve and then the painting and said, “We’re getting closer.” Dawn ran her fingers through Eve’s hair and tugged on the bow. “My little spark of inspiration.”
Dawn removed the painting from its easel and placed it against the wall near the other rejected works. She went into the closet along the back wall and looked at the various blank canvases inside. There were multiple shapes and sizes, in either black or white. Dawn grabbed a four-by-four-foot white one and brought it to the easel.
“Maybe . . . maybe I need to try something different,” Dawn said. She looked at the bright blue clusters of flowers on her robe, turned to Eve, and said, “Perhaps a pop of color.”
Dawn went to the closet and began to comb through the drawers, rifling through a seemingly endless supply of white, black, and gray paints. After a bit of searching, Dawn found a crinkled tube labeled WINSOR BLUE. She opened the cap, only to discover the contents had dried out over time. Dawn laughed and tossed it aside. “I guess I need some new paint.”
Dawn looked at Eve and smiled. “We can go together. Maybe.. . . . maybe Jacob could join us.” Dawn bit her upper lip and frowned. “Oh wait, he’s got clients all day today. Again.”
Dawn flopped on the cold polished concrete floor beside Eve and stared into the doll’s sapphire blue eyes. Dawn said, “I wish he’d just give it all up, you know? Why does he keep such a busy schedule? We had such a great two days together. But now I have this feeling he’s going to be working non-stop all week. Again.”
The chilly floor made Dawn’s legs and feet throb. She pulled herself up and walked over to the wall of windows. The view across the Hudson looked stunning as the rising sun cast a warm orange glow across the skyline. She said, “And is it my imagination, or are his clients more important than me?” Dawn pressed her head against the glass and sighed. “Maybe I’m just being paranoid.”
Don’t trust him.
The faint, echoing voice was identical to the one she’d heard upstairs. Dawn turned and looked back into the room. Jazz music wafted down from the overhead speakers. She looked up and then let her eyes wander across the paintings. Her eyes finally settled on Eve, sitting in the wooden chair.
“Who . . . who said that?” Dawn asked.
Dawn slowly crossed the floor until she got to Eve. The doll’s eyes sparkled in the early morning light. As Dawn knelt down beside the chair, she said, “I must be hearing things.” She picked Eve up and held the doll close to her face. Dawn bit her upper lip and asked, “Right, Eve?”
Twenty One
Breaking Through
Dawn inspected the red and blue flecks of paint on her fingertips. Two easels stood in the middle of her studio, displaying her latest half-finished works of art. Using white four-by-four canvases, both were variations of the painting she’d started earlier, but with a twist. The twin hills now had a third hump, wedged in the middle. Dawn wasn’t sure if it was another hill, the sun, or the moon. One painting was red, the other blue.
“It’s not perfect, but it’s getting there,” Dawn said.
Eve sat in the wooden folding chair against the wall, the doll’s porcelain white face glowing beneath the overhead lights. Dawn glanced at the wall of windows, taking in the nighttime skyline across the Hudson. She yawned and stretched her arms. Dawn looked at Eve and said, “I think that’s enough for today.”
Dawn scooped Eve into her arms and left the room. The flames beneath the glass crystals in the living room fireplace crackled softly. Dawn placed Eve on the loveseat and went to the wine fridge in the kitchen. She opened the door and grabbed the nearest bottle of white wine. Dawn briefly studied the label and then gently placed the bottle back inside. She selected a bottle of merlot instead.
“A pop of color, right, Eve?” Dawn opened the bottle, poured a glass for herself, and went back to the loveseat. She put her arm around Eve and stared at the twinkling fireplace. Dawn took a sip of wine and smiled. “This was a good day.”
Rarely a fan of red wine, Dawn found herself enjoying the deep dry berry taste of the merlot. The soothing saxophone of David Sanborn’s Everything Must Change wafted from the overhead speakers. She brought Eve up to the nursery and slid the doll beneath the blanket. Dawn whispered, “Get some rest. I’ll be back later.”
Dawn flicked on the nightlight. Soon, the walls and ceiling were awash in red and blue ribbons and star
s. Eve’s eyes snapped closed. Dawn left, closing the door behind her, and went back downstairs.
With Eve tucked away, Dawn spent some time cleaning the kitchen from her dinner earlier. When done, she grabbed the latest copy of Vogue and collapsed by the fireplace, enjoying the wine and music. She exchanged a few brief messages with Jacob, who, unsurprisingly, couldn’t come over. By the end of the night, she’d consumed three-quarters of the bottle of merlot. Dawn left the dirty glass beside the sink and filled a goblet with water.
As Dawn ascended the spiral staircase, she said, “Evelyn, secure the apartment.”
“Securing the apartment.”
Dawn stopped on the second floor and opened the door to the nursery. The spiral of red and blue stars caused her to smile. She tip-toed to the cradle in the middle of the room, enjoying the scent from the lavender gel beads. Eve was tucked beneath the white cotton blanket. Dawn gently picked the doll up and cradled it in her arms.
Leaving the projector light running, she left and carried Eve upstairs to the owner’s suite. She placed the doll on the bed so that Eve faced the bathroom door. Eve’s eyes snapped open.
Dawn gave Eve a peck on the cheek and dove beneath her bed to get the wooden box with her fertility pills. She tossed the box on the corner of the bed and carried the pill bottle into the bathroom.
Dawn spent some time scrubbing her hands to remove a few remaining bits of paint. As she stared at her reflection, Dawn realized she’d forgotten to make an appointment to have her hair colored. She smiled as she ran her fingers through her dark roots.
The pills prescribed by Dr. Cole were beside the sink. She sighed, and her smile faded. Dawn washed each one down, followed by her fertility pill. She ignored the sapphire pendant from Jacob, sparkling beside the mirror.