“Agreed, I love you, James, and I can’t wait to change my name. Being Mrs. Wild instead of Ms. Mattison will help free me from some of the horrors I’ve lived through in that name.”
Chapter Twenty-One
We had barely been home a day when my cell rang. I smiled when I answered and blurted out that James had proposed.
“Oh. My. Gosh, we’re going to be sisters,” Billie gushed down the line when I told her and smiled at how happy she was with my news. I held out my hand and stared again at the beautiful ring on my finger. James had taste. Erin’s response had sounded just as excited as Billie’s, when we told her. She hardly knew James, but I could tell she already adored him.
“Yeah, and there I was thinking he’d never ask,” I muttered, ashamed of that fact.
“So, he’s not Sawyer,” I heard her say, and imagined her shrugging her shoulders because they were married in a matter of months after being together.
“They’re more alike than they know,” I argued.
“I hear you, girlfriend, but it’s funny how neither of them can see it.”
“I want to confront my dad before I start making wedding arrangements,” I told her, changing the subject abruptly and back to the issue I’d been discussing, before I caved and told her James had proposed.
“That’s probably for the best and you have your mom’s will reading. Are you going to do it then?”
“Yeah, I spoke to Marnie, who is livid about the whole thing. I know I shouldn’t feel compassion toward my dad because of that visit. But he’s just buried my mom. Marnie is far harder than me. She reminded me I’d had a child and they’d taken me to sit in her company and neither one of them had told me that the child was mine. I’m going to confront my dad after the will reading next week. Once that’s done, James wants me to arrange the wedding … I think he thinks it’ll be a good diversion for me.”
“What do you want for your wedding?”
“Not a big white wedding, that’s for sure. Very intimate, family, I think … maybe a couple of others. I don’t want to invite people I only see once or twice a year.”
“Friends?”
“Maybe Rhea. Will you be my maid of honor and Brynn can be a flower girl? We’ll get her one of those fancy-assed princess dresses and some ballet shoes.
“Oh, Tricia, you have to ask her to do that. She will be over the moon. It would mean much more to her coming from you than me. What about Remy? Can he carry the rings or something?”
“Of course, it’s a deal. Let’s get next week out of the way, and then we’ll make plans.”
“Eek, I’m so excited for you.”
“Thanks, I think James is more excited than I am, if that can be at all possible.”
“He adores you, Tricia, and he’s no more than you deserve— than you both deserve … you deserve each.” she babbled.
“I get the drift, Billie, you can stop now. How are the kids?”
“Good, Colby’s going to Logan’s, next week on Saturday.” Logan was Colby’s father from Billie’s previous marriage.
“How’s that going?”
“Logan’s new woman?” Billie sighed. “Better suited to him than I was. They’re good together. He’s still on the wagon and Phyllis is good for Colby too. She’s got a fun sense of humor and Colby relates. I think he had a bit of split loyalty about liking her. As if he wasn’t sure he could like her because of me, but Sawyer and I sat and had a long talk with him about it. I’m actually pleased for Logan. I’d have hated him growing old with no one, besides, it’s better if we can all get along for Colby’s sake. Having them at Christmas time takes the stress out of the occasion for everyone, I think.”
“Oh sorry, Billie, I have James on another call. We’ll do this later, love to Sawyer and the kids,” I said, cutting the call and picking up James’.
“Hey, baby, were you on the phone?”
“Yeah, talking to Billie, but we’re through now. Everything okay?”
“Sure. My parents are coming into New York this evening. There’s a show on Broadway my mom has been dying to see. I’m just checking your schedule. Before I invite them, can I make a breakfast date for tomorrow morning?”
“No problem. Are you planning on telling them our news?”
“Yeah, I was going to take us to The Hamptons, but as they’re coming into town I figured it would save us a trip.”
“Perfect. I’m nervous,” I admitted, chuckling.
“Why? They think of you as family already.”
“I know, but this makes it official.”
“I can’t wait to make you official, baby.”
“We’re hardly kids, James. Don’t you feel a little shy doing this at our age?”
“Shy? Hell no, you make me feel like I’m ‘twentysomething’ again.”
“Well, I make your dick feel like that anyway, from all the action you appear to want.”
“Are you complaining?”
I chuckled. “How could I complain with a man who has a libido that would rival a rock star?”
“Rock stars are overrated, and all those aggressive manly sports I do are great for testosterone surges.”
“Manly sports?” I chuckled. “You’re starting to sound sexist, James.”
“All right, I’ll give you that, but you’re in your prime, fortysomething is the twentysomething in man years.”
“It is, so you’d better stay fit and keep up,” I replied with a chuckle.
“Where are you now?”
“At home. Where else would I be?”
“How’s about a ‘nooner’? Just to prove to you I can get it up at anytime during the day, and it’s not all morning wood?”
“It’s already 11:45 a.m., James, you’d better run if you’re going to make it home on time.” The call dropped and I laughed out loud, imagining him shrugging on his suit jacket and making some lame-assed excuse to get home because he couldn’t resist me.
I tossed my cell on the bed on the way to the shower, freshened up quickly, and put on a new lingerie set I had bought. It was black and lacy, not too sheer, but it had a garter belt and stockings to match. I knew as soon as I saw it, James would appreciate it. I’d barely finished clasping the bra when I heard the key in the front door, so I lay on the bed and smiled as he entered the room, excited for whatever James had in mind.
“Wow,” he said breathily, as he stalked toward me, stripping out of his jacket. Loosening his tie, his fingers worked deftly on the buttons of his shirt, as he quickly shed his upper body of clothing. I watched in delight as his strong muscles bunched and stretched with every move, as he reached for his belt buckle and tugged the strap free. “You look fucking edible,” he told me gruffly, flicking open his pants fly and dropping them to the floor.
“Come here,” I whispered, my fingertips toying with the lacy edge over my bust.
“Oh, I’m coming,” he muttered, his tone warning as he toed off his shoes, discarded his pants, and stripped his boxers down his legs to the floor.
“God, baby, you set me on fire,” he whispered, as he laid his deliciously heavy body over mine and tucked his mouth under my chin to kiss my neck. The air around us positively crackled with the electrical force between us as he ground his hips against mine. Lifting his head, he grinned, a smile so wide it showed almost all of his teeth and creased the corners of his eyes. “This is what I live for, this connection we share … we’d never find this anywhere else.”
“I’ve brought nothing but trouble—” His fingertips pressed over my lips and effectively silenced me.
“Before I met you, women would have said trouble was my second name. Nothing is too much trouble for you, baby,” he muttered, placing tiny soothing kisses over my face, and more passionate ones down my neck, spreading goosebumps over my flesh. “You are worth every single second of my time,” he whispered seductively, as his mouth drove me wild and his fingers slid under my lacy black panties.
“So wet for me already,” he teased playfully.
“And I love these,” he praised, his voice sinking an octave lower.
“So hard … all that for me?” I countered back, canting my pelvis toward him. He cocked his head to the side and gave me another smile.
“Love that sassy, confident woman, baby, she’s been a little distracted for a while.”
“I have, but I’m here now and, Mr. Wild, I’m about to show you the ride of your life.” Rolling us over, he pushed on my shoulders until I sat astride him. He immediately cupped my breasts in the palms of his hands.
“Take what you want,” he muttered, grinning. His gorgeous blue eyes held a glint of amusement and looked desperate with lust.
“Oh, I’m taking,” I warned, sliding my panties to the side. He glided his thick hard cock along my seam and drove me wild when he teased it at my entrance.
“So fucking slick,” he ground out, grabbing my hips and forcing me down harder against it. A fresh burst of desire made me wetter and I just couldn’t wait anymore.
Grabbing his coated cock in my hand, I placed his wet tip at my entrance and sank slowly down on it, feeling every delicious inch stretch me wider until he was deep inside and I was fully seated on his hips. I felt his hard balls press against my ass, when he grabbed my hips tighter, held me down a few fractions deeper, spread his legs wider, and gyrated his hips up in a circular motion.
“Fuck, baby, this is the most indescribable feeling.”
“So deep,” I muttered, as I began my rise and fall movements slowly, building his desire with every slip and slide. It drove him crazy until he couldn’t stand it any longer and pulled his knees up and wider, fucking me from beneath. He immediately stopped when I took over and bounced, taking charge of his pleasure, and was rewarded with another wide grin as he took his hands from me and clasped them behind his head.
“Have at it, show me what you’ve got,” he teased, but his cocky voice was gruff and his eyes showed the true passion that lay beneath his arrogant words.
For the first time since I’d confessed to him about Erin, I felt truly free to let myself go and pleasure my man like he deserved.
Chapter Twenty-Two
Naturally, we were all apprehensive about me confronting my dad. Despite the thought he knew I’d had Erin, I still couldn’t help feeling concerned about challenging him at his age. I shouldn’t have cared, but I had a lifetime of loyalty toward him. He’d been the one person who I thought I’d had a special relationship with, but seeing the picture Erin had shown me diminished my respect for him.
Mom’s will had been due to be read later that week, but I had decided I couldn’t wait another day to tell my father how seeing that image had made me feel. Of course, both James and Marnie asked me not to act in haste, to wait a while longer, because of the shock to my dad of my mom’s death, but by then I couldn’t have cared less.
Hiding my pregnancy and the adoption was the reason why I’d missed out on a warm loving relationship with any man in my past, and since I’d had James in my present, he had been neglected due to those unresolved issues.
“Promise me you won’t lose your temper,” Marnie begged, when she opened the car door for me to get out the moment we arrived at my parents’ house. “Is that a ring? Wait, did you two get engaged?”
“Yes, it’s a ring and James and I are beyond excited we’re going to be married, but not now, Marnie. I’m not here to talk about that and I’m tired of thinking about anyone else’s feelings. For most of my life everyone has always told me not to rock the boat, don’t upset people, what will people think? I’m sick of being warned how I should consider other people when they don’t appear to give a fuck how they have treated me. I’ve kept this secret for far too long, and then I’m hit between the eyes with evidence that it’s the worst-kept secret in the universe.”
“Whoa, take a breath, baby. Marnie’s right, Tricia,” James reluctantly agreed.
My head reeled around, and I stared him down with thunderous look. “Is that so? Neither of you were the ones who had to stare at themselves in a picture taken many years ago, sitting two feet away from the child who’d been given up for adoption ... although I may add there was nothing given about that situation.”
Placing his hands at either side of my head, James focused my attention on him. I stared into his concerned eyes, and felt my anger disperse.
“We’re on your side, remember? What you say is true. We can’t possibly know what it feels like to find out what you know, but if you want him to give you answers, approaching this aggressively isn’t going to get them for you. We’re not asking you to show much compassion, we’re asking you to be measured in your approach to how you handle this. Controlling your feelings will help get the answers you’re looking for.” I took a long breath while I considered his advice and blew it out. What he said made sense.
I shrugged. “Okay, no flying off the handle, no cursing, and no loud voice, but I’m giving him no wiggle room, and I don’t want anyone butting in on my dialogue. He answers for himself, so don’t you dare go helping him out if you start feeling sorry for him, Marnie,” I warned.
Pushing open the door, Marnie led the way to where our dad was reading the local newspaper on a chair in the kitchen.
“Hey, Tricia, how’s my baby girl?” my dad asked, immediately folding up the paper and setting it down on the table.
“I need to talk to you,” I snapped. Immediately realizing something was wrong, he sat up straight at my lack of usual affection and gave me his full attention.
“Sure, what’s wrong?” he asked, sounding anxious as his eyes ticked over me because of my stilted conversation and clipped tone.
Reaching into my purse, I pulled out a print of the image Erin had shown me and placed it in front of him. Dad leaned forward and scrutinized the picture. Glancing up at me he looked confused, his brow furrowed in a deep crease.
“Where did you get this?” he asked, his voice carrying the same puzzled look as his face implied.
“Where indeed? Did that other couple in the picture give it to me, or your granddaughter, perhaps?” I suggested, trying to keep a lid on my brewing temper when I was faced by his expressionless blinking denial. When he continued to say nothing and looked dumbfounded, I pushed him again. “Nothing to say? That’s not like you, Dad, but you know, I never realized you had such a game face. All these years and I hadn’t the slightest inkling you knew.”
My chest heaved from the adrenaline coursing through my body, making my extremities shake and my voice tremble with emotion.
My dad sat back in his chair, his spine straight, the frown between his eyes deepening. “What the hell are you talking about, Tricia? Granddaughter? Are you implying the woman in the picture is a sibling of yours? This is your mother’s cousin, her husband, and their daughter with us. Your mom insisted we visit them before you left college and started work. I think it was her way of showing you to work first and wait to have kids of your own. It backfired, because that little angel was so well behaved, she came out of there regretting that call. She even said she couldn’t wait for Marnie to start a family. If you remember, Marnie was getting married that year.”
Sibling? Was this the cover story my mom and dad had made up if ever they were called out on this?
“You expect me to believe Mom took you all the way to Ohio to meet a cousin of hers you’d never met before?”
“That wasn’t the only reason we went. You remember my farmhand, Jim Hepskin? He was retiring and we were invited to his retirement party. Jim was a great support to me. It broke my heart when we left Ohio and he had to find work somewhere else. Anyway, he couldn’t get on in his new job and retired. I felt the least we could do was to show our faces, given all the years he’d been loyal to me.”
I ran my hand through my hair, because my body buzzed in frustration when I thought back again to how I’d been unwittingly paraded in front of my birthchild because they’d gone out of their way to show their consideration for an old farmhand.
“Wha
t was the order of things? Did you arrange to go see the Foleys before you decided to attend Jim’s party or what?”
“No … no, I don’t know what you mean. Jim sent us an invite and your mom chewed it over for a couple of days. Then she told me a cousin of hers she had never met had recently moved to Ohio. She said it was ironic since we’d left, and it would be the courteous thing to visit while we were there.”
“Whoa. So, there was every courtesy shown for a man who worked your land, but none for your daughter?”
My dad rose to his feet. He’d clearly grown frustrated and angry by my line of questioning.
“I’ll ask you again. What the hell is going on here, Tricia? I have no idea why you’re getting your panties in a twist about going to see a relative who we’ve met once, and who we’ve never seen again.”
“Are you really going to stand there and deny knowing that the child in that picture was my daughter?”
From the ashen look on my father’s face it was immediately clear he was stunned by my outburst. Reaching out for the chair, he sat dazed, staring up at me for a good long minute before he found his tongue.
“Your daughter? I … don’t … I don’t understand.” The look of disbelief on his face was priceless and I knew instantly that he’d either had no idea about her or he didn’t only have a great game face, he was an exceptional actor. The shock when I realized he really hadn’t known struck me like a punch in my heart. Guilt overwhelmed me and I stared blindly, focusing on nothing as my throat closed in another swell of emotion.
“Lester, there’s been a terrible misunderstanding, but there is something you need to know,” I heard James say. It had sounded ridiculous since I’d already blurted the whole thing out.
For the following ten minutes, I listened while James explained the whole situation to my elderly father, as Marnie held his hand. Tears streamed down his face and mine as he stared at me, heartbroken. I felt as if my heart was being slowly but systematically peeled layer by layer, ripped apart by the words I heard James utter that added to my father’s despair.
Resist Me (Unchained Attraction Book 4) Page 16