Three Plays

by Gurcharan Das

  I like holding your hand, Ansu. It feels so warm.

  (He kisses her hand.)

  Ansuya, there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you …

  ANSUYA: Sh … don’t say anything. Keep still, Mamu.

  MAMU: Please Ansuya, this concerns you and me …

  ANSUYA: Mamu?

  MAMU: I’ve been meaning to tell you for some time …

  ANSUYA: Mamu!

  MAMU: I must tell you now …

  ANSUYA: No!

  (Pause.)

  You’ve been good to me, Mamu. I don’t want to spoil it. It is Diwali, I’m happy.

  MAMU: (Sad.) Well, I am not.

  (Pause.)

  Look at me. I’ve lived all my life with books and ideas. And here I am, stuck with shallow people like the Rai Sahebs and Deepaks of this world. I have no one to talk to … except you, and even you are drawing away from me. I am beginning to feel like a complete failure.

  ANSUYA: You say it as though it were my fault.

  MAMU: No, no, my sweet Ansuya.

  (He grabs her by the arm.)

  It’s just that I can’t bear to lose you.

  ANSUYA: Sh … Deepak and the others will come in.

  MAMU: Why has Deepak come?

  (Sounds of footsteps.)

  ANSUYA: Mamu, please!

  (Breaking away from him.)

  There’s Deepak!

  (Enter Deepak. He is suited and booted, the picture of confidence, but he is a little disconcerted by what he sees.)

  DEEPAK: I … I didn’t mean to interrupt.

  ANSUYA: You did not. We were just waiting for everyone. Do sit down, Deepak.

  DEEPAK: (Uneasily.) Well, ah …

  (To Mamu.)

  Karan Uncle, how do you like the university?

  MAMU: Which university?

  DEEPAK: Where you teach.

  MAMU: What do you want me to say?

  DEEPAK: Well … ah …

  MAMU: Are you making polite conversation, or do you really want to know?

  DEEPAK: Well …

  MAMU: If you want to know the truth, I hate it.

  DEEPAK: I’m sorry.

  MAMU: ‘Sorry?’ Why are you ‘sorry?’ Do you want to know why?

  DEEPAK: Yes.

  MAMU: No, you don’t.

  DEEPAK: (With a good natured smile.) I don’t?

  MAMU: Deepak, you are ambitious. All you want to do is to get on in life. You don’t really want to know about the dark side of things.

  ANSUYA: (Uncomfortably.) Mamu, this is not the place …

  MAMU: You are not even aware what the words you use really mean. Do you really care what ‘love-hate,’ ‘beautiful-ugly’ ‘true-false’ are all about?

  ANSUYA: Mamu, please!

  MAMU: (Ignoring her.) There’s nothing wrong with that. But, let me give you a tip. Don’t waste your time over small talk. Do you really care about my university?

  DEEPAK: (Puzzled.) Well …

  MAMU: Of course you don’t. So then, let’s talk about what you really care about.

  DEEPAK: (Affably.) Certainly.

  MAMU: Let’s talk about Ansuya.

  ANSUYA: Mamu, for God’s sake.

  MAMU: Tell us about your interest in Ansuya.

  DEEPAK: (Suspiciously.) What about her?

  MAMU: Well, I thought it would be nice to know how you feel about her. I am her uncle, after all.

  ANSUYA: (In tears.) Mamu, you’re spoiling everything.

  MAMU: I don’t want to embarrass you. I’m fascinated by the methodology of your mind … by the pragmatic calculation which a successful business executive makes in taking a decision about another human being. It’s purely an intellectual interest, mind you, nothing personal … an interest in a certain type of human being, who is rational, self-interested and—what’s the word … optimising.

  DEEPAK: (With a puzzled smile.) You don’t seem to like me or the work I do.

  MAMU: Deepak, I am fascinated by the business world and how it works.

  DEEPAK: Sir, I am proud of what I do and the company I work for. You may think what you like, but I believe we care more about our people than many academics do for their students.

  MAMU: Hold on …

  DEEPAK: (Continuing.) I mean, we care about our customers, our suppliers, our employees, because for us it is a matter of survival. I can’t remember a single professor of mine at college who cared for me in the same way.

  MAMU: Now, hold on …

  (Knocking at the door. Ansuya is relieved.)

  ANSUYA: There is Rai Saheb.

  (Shouting.)

  Amma, Rai Saheb is here!

  (Ansuya opens the door. Rai Saheb comes in, looking tweedy, distinguished, and the pukka ‘brown sahib.’ Chitra is dressed to kill.)

  AMRITA: (Off-stage.) Oh no, is he here already? And I’m not quite ready (Entering with a bowl of flowers.)

  Bunty, Happy Diwali!

  RAI SAHEB: Happy Diwali!

  AMRITA: Just smell these gorgeous October roses! Aren’t they lovely?

  RAI SAHEB: Not half as lovely as you, my dear! I’m not early, am I?

  AMRITA: No. You know how it gets dark early in Simla these days. Bunty, I want you to meet Chitra, a family friend of ours from Lahore. And this is her son, Deepak.

  CHITRA: (Manufacturing her biggest smile.) Namaste, Rai Saheb! Aap ke baare me to bahut suna hai!

  RAI SAHEB: Nothing good, I hope!

  DEEPAK: (Shaking hands.) Hello, I’m Kapur, sir.

  AMRITA: (To Rai Saheb.) Deepak is a fine young man, Bunty, doing famously in a company in Bombay.

  RAI SAHEB: Which company?

  DEEPAK: TCK, sir.

  ANSUYA: Deepak’s from the big city, Bunty Uncle.

  RAI SAHEB: Well, we are not exactly villagers.

  ANSUYA: Delhi is a village by comparison.

  AMRITA: (To Rai Saheb.) Chitra here grew up with me in Lahore; her father was Papa’s legal aide, and they lived in our compound at Lahore.

  RAI SAHEB: (To Ansuya.) Ansu, my dear, you are looking positively radiant.

  AMRITA: You will have your usual, Bunty? With soda?

  RAI SAHEB: A splash of soda, thank you.

  MAMU: Scotch for the Brown Sahib.

  AMRITA: And for you, Deepak?

  DEEPAK: The same, thank you, aunty.

  AMRITA: Chitra?

  CHITRA: Tea for me, ji.

  AMRITA: Karan?

  MAMU: Indian whiskey with water will do for me, thank you. I’ll get the drinks. (He gets up to make the drinks.)

  AMRITA: (Frowning at Mamu.) You know my brother. He must be different.

  ANSUYA: I’ll get the tea, Amma.

  (Exit.)

  AMRITA: (Graciously changing the subject.) It has been an unusually damp October, especially after such a lovely summer.

  RAI SAHEB: (Winking naughtily.) Do you know, I caught Bubbles at it last Friday? Imagine, Bubbles Chopra, wearing chappals on the Mall! Poor man, he was mortified when he saw me, and tried to sneak away. I went up to him and I said, ‘Could I buy you a pair of shoes, old man?’

  (And he roars with laughter. Deepak and then Chitra join in.)

  MAMU: (Mimicking him.) ‘I say, old chap, what is wrong with chappals?’

  (Amrita frowns at him.)

  RAI SAHEB: Nothing … in your bedroom.

  (Continues to laugh.)

  MAMU: The whole country wears chappals, Rai Saheb.

  (Ansuya enters with a tray of tea. Deepak begins to sneeze.)

  ANSUYA: Mamu’s cat!

  CHITRA: The cat will be the death of this boy.

  AMRITA: Poor Deepak! Karan, you and your cat. Lock it up!

  MAMU: What can I do if she sneaks out? She watches Deepak like a mouse.

  RAI SAHEB: (Laughing.) Ha! Ha! Like a mouse. If we cross Karan and his cat, it would improve Karan, but it would deteriorate the cat. Ho, ho, ho!

  AMRITA: Really, Bunty!

  (To Deepak.)

  Are you better
, son? You know this boy, Bunty, he is doing brilliantly in Bombay.

  CHITRA: (Interrupting.) Rai Saheb, this boy never opened a book in his life and he always came first.

  DEEPAK: (Embarrassed.) Ma, please!

  CHITRA: (Not to be stopped.) Rai Saheb, jab yeh chhota sa tha, tab se bahut seedha tha. Hamesha apna doodh peeta tha, school se seedha ghar laut aata tha, not like other boys. He always combed his hair …

  DEEPAK: Ma!

  CHITRA: Listen to him, ji. After all I do for him. You know, he likes rice. So on Sundays, I make him Basmati rice, which costs five rupees a kilo, while I eat the one rupee, char anna variety from the ration shop. And this is my reward, ji.

  DEEPAK: (Almost screaming.) Ma!

  (To Rai Saheb.)

  I am sorry, sir.

  MAMU: Deepak and his Ma!

  ANSUYA: (Giving Mamu a dirty look.) Mamu!

  RAI SAHEB: (Patronizingly.) Hmm. What school did you go to, young man?

  DEEPAK: (Charmingly.) I went to St. Mary’s in Bombay, sir.

  MAMU: You don’t have to say ‘sir’ all the time. This isn’t an office, you know.

  AMRITA: (Rescuing Deepak.) He’s just a well-brought-up boy. He respects his elders.

  MAMU: Why don’t you say ‘sir’ with a question mark at the end? Like this: ‘Sir?’ Interesting, isn’t it? ‘Sir?’ … leaves a doubt in the mind.

  AMRITA: Stop it, Karan Chand.

  DEEPAK: Well, ah …

  RAI SAHEB: (Patronizingly.) What does your father do?

  (Uneasy pause.)

  DEEPAK: (Defensively.) Oh, he is a businessman.

  RAI SAHEB: And what is his business?

  CHITRA: (After a brief pause.) Buying and selling, ji.

  RAI SAHEB: Buying and selling what?

  (Another uncomfortable pause.)

  DEEPAK: (Crestfallen.) He runs a general store.

  RAI SAHEB: (Contemptuously.) Oh, a shopkeeper. Where is his shop?

  CHITRA: Deepak lives on Malabar Hill with the gentry.

  RAI SAHEB: Yes, I see, but where is the shop?

  DEEPAK: (Quietly.) At Ghatkopar, sir.

  CHITRA: But we live in Deepak’s big flat on Malabar Hill.

  RAI SAHEB: (Suddenly beaming at Chitra.) On Malabar Hill? And where have you been hiding yourself, my dear? Here we have a beauty in our midst and no one knows about it.

  CHITRA: (Blushing.) Oh, I just came this morning, ji.

  RAI SAHEB: (Flirting.) Well you must come to the Club and meet everyone.

  CHITRA: (Gushing.) Oh yes ji, I’d love to meet, ji.

  RAI SAHEB: (Putting his arm around her.) How about a drink for you, my dear? Don’t tell me you are going to keep drinking tea the whole evening.

  CHITRA: (Reluctantly.) Well, you know Rai Saheb, I don’t drink really.

  RAI SAHEB: (Flirting.) There’s always a first time. Come along, my dear, just to keep us company.

  CHITRA: (Giggling.) Well, if you say so ji, just a tiny bit.

  RAI SAHEB: Come!

  (And he takes Chitra with him towards the drinks table. He still has his arm around her.)

  Come, we’ll go to the Club this evening. (Chitra giggles.)

  It’s settled, then.

  ANSUYA: Let’s go outside, Deepak. It’s dark now.

  DEEPAK: (Reluctantly.) Later, Ansuya.

  ANSUYA: (Feverishly.) But its’s lovely outside. Come!

  RAI SAHEB: (Smiling.) Ansu, my dear, why not celebrate it with a drink?

  ANSUYA: (Crossly.) No.

  RAI SAHEB: Let’s have some music.

  (To Chitra.)

  You do dance, don’t you, my dear?

  CHITRA: You can teach me, ji.

  RAI SAHEB: Amrita my dear, don’t you have anything danceable? How about a fox-trot?

  AMRITA: I’ll put on the music.

  (As the music comes on, Rai Saheb swings and does a few steps, humming to himself and starts demonstrating the steps to Chitra.)

  RAI SAHEB: Amrita, why don’t you bring your guests to the party at the Government House?

  (Silence.)

  AMRITA: (Hurt.) Is there a party at the Government House?

  RAI SAHEB: Yes, tomorrow evening.

  AMRITA: (Hurt.) We haven’t been invited.

  RAI SAHEB: (Covering up.) Really? Not possible. Someone’s slipped up. (Rai Saheb takes Chitra in his arms and begins to dance with her.)

  AMRITA: Besides, those parties aren’t worth going to any more.

  CHITRA: You move so nicely, ji.

  RAI SAHEB: Just follow me.

  CHITRA: (Hesitantly.) Oh, I don’t know these steps, ji …

  RAI SAHEB: It’s easy, see. One, two, three; one, two, three …

  CHITRA: (Getting into the swing.) Oh! You move so smoothly. You make it so easy.

  RAI SAHEB: (Seductively.) I like the way you move.

  CHITRA: I like the way you move, too.

  MAMU: They like the way they move.

  AMRITA: Aren’t they cute, like youngsters?

  (Rai Saheb now holds Chitra closer and they dance tightly together)

  RAI SAHEB: You are warm, my dear.

  CHITRA: You too.

  RAI SAHEB: I like it.

  CHITRA: Me too.

  AMRITA: They are dancing like they’ve danced together before.

  MAMU: It’s a familiar game … they both know it.

  RAI SAHEB: You’re not shy.

  CHITRA: I’m … I’m not?

  MAMU: It’s an old ritual … as old as man and woman.

  DEEPAK: (Shocked.) What! Don’t say that about my mother.

  MAMU: Are you surprised?

  DEEPAK: (Angry.) Yes.

  ANSUYA: Deepak, let’s go out on the verandah now. Come!

  MAMU: (Desperately.) Ansu, please don’t go out!

  ANSUYA: Mamu, what’s wrong?

  MAMU: (Frantic.) I don’t know what’s come over me. I’m afraid something … something is going to happen.

  AMRITA: What’s wrong, Karan?

  ANSUYA: Come on, Deepak! Let’s go!

  MAMU: (Pleading.) Please don’t go out, Ansu!

  DEEPAK: (Sneezing.) Let’s go, yaar! I need to breathe … away from the cat.

  ANSUYA: (Singing.) Cum-bal-la Hill! Ma-la-bar Hill!

  (Exit Deepak and Ansuya.)

  AMRITA: Karan, you are behaving very strangely.

  MAMU: Don’t you see, she is vulnerable. She has been lonely for so long. Anyone, anyone who comes along could … Oh, the hell with it!

  (Stomps off to his room.)

  RAI SAHEB: (Dancing close.) Let’s go out for a while.

  CHITRA: Mm … if you wish.

  RAI SAHEB: Let’s go.

  (They stop dancing and go to the others.)

  Amrita, my dear, we’ll nip over to the Club and I’ll bring your lovely guest back soon … very soon.

  (Fade on Amrita alone on stage, as she switches off the music, picks up a pack of cards and starts playing Solitaire. Spot on Deepak and Ansuya in the veranda.)

  ANSUYA: (Sullen.) You were really ‘lagaoing’ an impression on him, weren’t you?

  DEEPAK: If I get this licence, it will be a big thing for my career, yaar.

  ANSUYA: (Sulking.) You are ambitious!

  DEEPAK: (Appeasingly.) What the hell, yaar!

  ANSUYA: Be yourself!

  (Pause.)

  DEEPAK: (Pensive.) I suppose you are right.

  ANSUYA: (Gently.) And don’t be ashamed of your father.

  (Pause.)

  Come, don’t look sad. You have too much dignity.

  DEEPAK: (Suddenly energetic.) Let’s light the candle, yaar.

  (They light a candle and then one sparkler each. As the candle and sparklers are lit, lights are slowly dimmed.)

  ANSUYA: (Glowing.) Oh Deepak, it’s beautiful!

  DEEPAK: And now the sparklers.

  ANSUYA: (Vivaciously.) Deepak, your mood is infectious. I’m already happy.

  DEEPAK: Give me a match, yaar.

&
nbsp; (Deepak starts lighting sparklers and gives them to Ansuya.)

  DEEPAK: Hang on … I’ll light this.

  (He lights another one, while Ansuya makes patterns in the air with the sparkler.)

  ANSUYA: I don’t think I’ll be able to sleep tonight.

  (Deepak is busy lighting diyas. She sings.)

  Cum-bal-la Hill, Cum-bal-la Hill!

  (Looking out.)

  Here I am, in this beautiful world, with the stars and the smell of the pine trees and the hills. Why can’t I be this happy all the time?

  (Pause.)

  Deepak, you know, you remind me of my father. You smile like him. You have his same sense of life … and hope.

  DEEPAK: (Pensive.) How life changes! You were the spoiled daughter of a rich father, remember?

  ANSUYA: (Wistfully.) No rich father, no spoiled daughter, no house, nothing. It’s all over!

  DEEPAK: (Suddenly serious.) Ansuya, come with me to Bombay.

  ANSUYA: (Stunned.) To Bombay?

  DEEPAK: Yes …

  ANSUYA: (Overjoyed.) Do you mean it?

  DEEPAK: Yes.

  ANSUYA: Oh, but I couldn’t. What will they say?

  DEEPAK: (Hesitantly.) I have a large flat and …

  ANSUYA: Do you really think I could go?

  (Frowning.)

  But what will I do?

  DEEPAK: You can work. You could start by converting this house into a hotel. I’ll fix up appointments with the hotel people. I can see it, ‘Jakhoo Hotel.’

  ANSUYA: (Frowning.) But I can’t do anything. I can’t even type.

  DEEPAK: I’ll help you.

  (In a professional manager’s tone.)

  We shall ask them to restore the house and the entrance will look just as it did fifty years ago. They’ll put in modern bathrooms, of course. We can position it as an exclusive, low volume, high margin venture.

  ANSUYA: (Joyfully.) I don’t know what those words mean, but it sounds so exciting, Deepak! I’ll ask Amma. I shall work hard in Bombay.

  (Going close to him.)

  Oh, it is a beautiful dream.

  DEEPAK: (Holding her in his arms.) It’s going to come true.

  ANSUYA: You mean it!

  DEEPAK: Come here.

  (They kiss.)

  ANSUYA: I still can’t believe it.

  (They kiss again.)

  Come, let’s go back to the others.

  DEEPAK: Shh! Not yet.

  ANSUYA: I’m afraid of your mother.

  DEEPAK: Come, let’s go to your room.

  ANSUYA: It’s late. It isn’t right.

  DEEPAK: Ansu, I need you in Bombay. It’s lonely with just Ma and … and sometimes she gets too much. She sits on my back like a monkey. She’s turned my father into a vegetable. And she’s going to do it to me too.