Leilani

by LM DeWalt

  “I guess I should,” I turned toward the spiral staircase. “It doesn’t feel right to be doing this without Christian.”

  “I know. It doesn’t feel right to us either,” Aloysius put an arm around Fiore to include her. “He will turn up too. I’m sure of it.”

  I turned without answering him. I had no idea what was going through Christian’s mind, no idea what made him turn his back on me and on our marriage.

  “Wait up,” Fiore said behind me. “I’ll walk with you.”

  When we reached the room Christian and I shared since our arrival in Lima, I hesitated at the door. All his things would still be inside. My anxiety grew as I talked myself into opening the door.

  “If you want, I’ll get your clothes for you. Just tell me what you want. You can trade rooms with me if that helps,” Fiore laid a hand on the small of my back, her touch reassuring and comforting.

  “No, I have to get a grip on this. He left me. He regrets me, us, what he is, all of it. I have to keep going for Jose Luis’s sake.” I gripped the doorknob and forced my wrist to turn.

  “I admire your strength, Lily. I don’t know if I could be as strong in this situation. If Aloysius suddenly disa—I ’m sorry, I didn’t mean…”

  “No, it’s ok. You really are in love, aren’t you?” I walked over to my dresser and pulled a drawer open, grabbing the first shirt I saw.

  Fiore smiled though her eyes didn’t. “I guess I am. It’s been a long time since someone loved me back, too. It’s just that…” Her gaze dropped to the floor.

  “What is it?” I hoped I had nothing to do with her confusion. She raised her head and smiled.

  “Don’t worry, Lily. I still love you, but in a different way now. I consider you more like a sister. There’s a bond between us that will never be broken.”

  “Then what is it?” I grabbed a pair of jeans from the closet shelf, along with a towel.

  “I don’t know how to say it exactly,” She patted the mattress for me to sit. “I’m not really sure if Aloysius feels the same way. He treats me great. He’s loving and caring in all the right circumstances, if you know what I mean?” She winked.

  “Then what’s the problem? He looks at you with admiration in his eyes, like he worships the ground you walk on,” I insisted.

  “That may be, but he pulls away sometimes. He gets this look in his eyes like he’s seeing something other than me, even when he’s looking right at me. I ask him what he’s thinking about and he always insists it’s nothing.” Her face saddened.

  “Has he told you he loves you?” That may have been prying a bit too much, but it may also help her so I waited for her response.

  She looked at the floor again. “No, but I haven’t told him either.”

  “What are you waiting for?” I lifted her face with the tips of my fingers.

  “I can’t do that!” Her eyes widened. “It may be totally acceptable nowadays, but I come from a different time, a time where I would have been ousted because of my feelings for you. I just can’t.” She stood and went to my dresser, pulling a drawer open. “I think you’ll need these, too.” She handed me underwear and a pair of socks. It was her way of dismissing the subject, something she must have learned from Aloysius.

  “Oh, right,” I said and stood, intending to head for the bathroom.

  “Hold on a minute,” Fiore grabbed my wrist. “That’s not what I brought you up here to discuss.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yesterday, sometime in the morning, Aaron called.”

  My body froze. “Did he ask for me?”

  She shook her head. “He wanted to talk to Aloysius. I’m not sure what they were talking about at first but I think it was about you toward the end. I heard Aloysius telling him what is going on here. He agreed to keep Aaron informed so he must have asked.”

  “Probably just a formality,” I said and walked out of the room, closing and locking the bathroom door behind me. Just a formality, that’s all.

  TWENTY-THREE

  Tears flowed freely again as the warm water washed over me, rinsing all the dirt away but none of the pain. Did Aaron ask about me or did he only listen and pretend to be interested in what Aloysius was saying? Did Kalia ask Aaron to ask Aloysius how I was doing? Memories of them fell hard upon me like the drops from the shower head.

  I’m not sure how long I stayed in the shower, but by the time I was dressed and ready to go downstairs, I heard voices coming from the dining room. “Sorry I kept you waiting,” I said as I walked into the room and toward the only empty chair which happened to be beside Mateo. I sat and looked away, but out of the corner of my eye, I saw him stiffen in his seat.

  Fiore sat on my other side, Giovanni at one end of the table and Aloysius at the other. Across from Fiore, Mateo, and me were Margarita, and Carlos. Vicente and Mauricio sat behind them on stools taken from the kitchen. They all nodded a greeting when they met my eyes.

  “Lily, we started without you so let me bring you up to speed,” Giovanni said. As head bodyguard, he must be in charge of the rescue effort. I nodded for him to continue. “Having been on the mountain before, I know the basic layout. Not everyone living up there is a hunter or witch. In fact, most of the inhabitants are innocents, which is why we need to keep this as simple and fast as possible.”

  “I understand but how are we going to find Jose Luis without searching every house? That could take hours and by that time they will know we’re there,” I said as I met Giovanni’s eyes. I felt Mateo’s eyes on me but avoided turning my face. I knew I overreacted to what Mateo had said the day I exchanged blood with him but now wasn’t the time to make amends. That would have to wait until later.

  “That’s what we were discussing while you were upstairs,” Aloysius replied. “Giovanni knows Arturo personally.”

  “What?” I looked at Giovanni and stood. “How is that possible? Have you worked with him?” My hands clenched under the table.

  “Please calm down,” Fiore whispered and took my hand. “Let him explain.”

  “Years ago, when Melinda first started making trouble for everyone, Arturo and I made a pact to protect the city. He was always against vampires but we had an understanding. The vampires who lived here previously knew how and where to hunt and knew making other vampires, especially when not warranted, was not allowed. Arturo and I worked together to prevent Melinda from creating vampires to serve her.”

  “Then why are they working together now?” I asked trying to stay calm.

  “We don’t know,” Aloysius answered instead of Giovanni. “The only reason we can think of is that Melinda brainwashed him somehow, probably promised him something.”

  “Knowing where Arturo lives is helpful because I’m assuming he is keeping Jose Luis with him. He has the most protection up there and he will be using that to his advantage,” Giovanni explained.

  “So what’s the plan then?” I patted Fiore’s hand under the table to let her know I was calm enough to continue.

  “You and Aloysius will transport to Arturo’s place, grab Jose Luis and, hopefully Leilani, and get out. The rest of us will be right below so they can’t get past us,” Giovanni said looking at the rest of the guards to make sure they understood.

  “Sounds logical and all but, what makes you think Leilani will be with them?” I countered.

  “You’re right to doubt they’d be together but we have to prepare for that possibility. And if she is with them, the possibility also exists that she may not want to come with us. Who knows what they’ve told her. We also have to consider…” Giovanni looked at Aloysius.

  Aloysius turned to me. “We may also find Christian up there. The rest will not only keep the others away from us, but they will also search for him,” he explained. I shook my head and everyone looked at me.

  “Christian is not up there. He wasn’t taken. He walked out on me.”

  Mateo turned to me. “But Lily—“

  “No, Mateo. You may not believe Christian capable of
leaving but I think I do. Maybe he had enough. Maybe he wants to be free and happy and that’s not possible as long as he stays by my side. There are way too many problems that I seem to cause. I don’t like that possibility but I understand it,” I choked back tears. Vicente pulled a tissue from the box on the counter and handed it to me. “I have to let him go. You need to do the same with Mariana.”

  Mateo looked at his lap, his hands wrapped tightly into fists. Instead of answering me, he just nodded. Aloysius cleared his throat and took our attention from Mateo, leaving him to fight his own tears.

  “We will do whatever possible to get out of there without a fight. We do nothing but search and grab, if you know what I mean, unless of course they engage us,” Aloysius turned to me. “No matter what, Lily and I will be grabbing who ever we can rescue up there and coming right back here. If there is a fight, the rest of you will take care of it. There is no need to put the children in harm’s way. Understood?”

  “Yes, sir,” everyone uttered in unison.

  “We wait until sundown then, less chance of tourists getting in the way.” Aloysius stood and motioned for Giovanni to follow him into the other room, probably to talk over the specifics.

  “Lily, are you ok?” Fiore wrapped an arm around my shoulders when I stood, her voice low since the others were still talking as they exited the room.

  “Yes, or I will be, anyway,” I pushed my chair under the table with more force than I intended, making Fiore take a step away. “This isn’t the first time this happened to me but I’ll be damned if it’s not the last.”

  “What do you mean by that?” she asked as she positioned herself in the doorway.

  “I mean, this is the second time I gave my heart away only to have it trampled on. I will not make that mistake again. If there is one positive thing about me it’s that I learn from my mistakes.”

  “Do you honestly think Christian up and left you? That just doesn’t seem possible to me. Not with the way he loves you.”

  “Fiore, I know you mean well. You’re as much a romantic as I am—or was, anyway. If he were taken, I would still feel the connection to him. I would still feel like he was a part of me, a part of my soul,” I paused and took a step back, placing a hand on the edge of the table to steady myself. I shook my head to stop the tears. I didn’t think I had any left yet they threatened to show my weakness. “I fell in love with Christian the first time I set eyes on him. I should’ve known to stay away, fought the urge harder than I did. But no. I was selfish. I wanted him and I got him. I took him away from everything he knew, from his friends, from a promising career, from a normal life. Instead, I condemned him to death, to an existence as lonely and eternal as mine. As much as I want to search for him, beg him to come back to me, I know I don’t deserve the happily ever after I know was possible by his side.”

  “You are being way too hard on yourself, Lily.” She stepped away from the doorway and came to take my hand in hers, looking into my eyes. “He loved you. He was willing to do anything to be with you, including die for you. I wouldn’t give that up without a fight.”

  “But he did, Fiore. Don’t you see? He left without as much as an explanation or a goodbye. And even if he was taken, he still renounced me, and my love. He’s gone. I am trying to accept that. Why can’t everyone else do the same?” I pulled my hand out of hers and rushed out of the room.

  “Where are you going?” Fiore yelled after me.

  “Just need to get some air,” I yelled back. Had anyone else asked, I would’ve just kept going, but Fiore didn’t deserve that. She had defied the others in Ireland, turned her back on them, to fight by my side. She had saved my life on more than one occasion. Fiore deserved my respect more than anyone.

  “Lily, wait up,” Mateo’s voice rang above the constant beeping of car horns. People rushed past me on their way to work, school, and whatever other normality their day consisted of. I quickened my pace as much as I could without running. I wanted to be alone, to think, to forget, at least for a little while, all the losses I’d suffered in the past year.

  “Leave me alone,” I yelled back as he approached despite my speed. “I want to be alone. Go bother somebody else, will you?”

  “You always were stubborn,” he panted, trying to catch his breath.

  “Look, Mateo, or Matthew, or whatever your name is, just because you knew me before, when I was human, doesn’t mean you can meddle in my life now.”

  “Ouch,” he said and turned his lips into a pout. “I’m not trying to meddle in your life. If you remember correctly, it was Aloysius who brought me into your life when he asked for my help in finding the boy.”

  “Exactly,” I stopped walking so I could turn to face him, glaring at him. “You were brought in to find Jose Luis, nothing more, nothing less.”

  “I understand that. It’s just that, well; I thought we could be friends. After all, I knew you when you were a child.”

  “I don’t need any more friends.” I spun on my heels and started walking. He followed close on my heels.

  “Everyone can use more friends. What makes you any different?”

  “In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m a vampire. I need to feed and survive, that is all.”

  He laughed, stopping me dead in my tracks and filling me with anger from head to toes. “What is so funny?” I screamed making passersby jump and hasten their step.

  “You think that makes you so different than anyone else? Just because you suck blood for survival?” He said quietly, and crossed his arms over his chest. “You still feel. You still love and hate and cry. The only things that make you different are that you don’t eat and drink like a human. You don’t sleep and you don’t die. Well, not dying isn’t quite true but you know what I mean. Just because you’re a predator doesn’t mean you don’t need anything else.”

  He looked at me but I was too furious to open my mouth, not here in front of all these humans. Instead, I looked at the ground, my hands balled into fists ready to slam into his face if he said anything else.

  His soft touch on my chin startled me out of my fury as he lifted my face to meet his eyes. “Look, Lily, I know you’re hurting. I know you think you have to be tough and powerful. I know you think you have to take care of everyone but what about you, huh? Who’s going to take care of you?”

  Though I wanted to scream at him, my voice came out a broken whisper. “I don’t need anyone to take care of me. I can do it myself. I always have.”

  His lips softened into a smile. “That’s what I mean. You’re not taking very good care of yourself lately. I can tell by your color that you haven’t fed. I can tell by the blank look in your eyes and the coldness in your tone that you’re trying to push everyone away who isn’t Christian.”

  I swallowed hard and pushed his hand off my chin. “You think you know me so well.” There was no conviction my voice. I knew what he was saying was true, but I wasn’t ready to let him know it.

  “No. I’m not saying that at all. I’m hurting too, believe me, Lily. I love Mariana, despite what everyone else thinks of her. I know her in a way that no one else does. I know how loving and tender she can be. Believe me, I felt like pushing everyone away at first but, as you well know, I don’t have time to do that. I have a job to do and that’s to find Jose Luis. It’s because of you and this case that I have made new friends. I feel less alone with you, Fiore, and Aloysius in my life. I think you would feel the same if you only allowed yourself to embrace them instead of pushing them away.”

  He was right, I knew, but for some reason it felt better to hang on to my anger and hurt. I didn’t feel like arguing with him at the moment, not in the middle of the sidewalk anyway. “There’s a coffee shop about two blocks that way,” I pointed. “Want to go get some?”

  “You’re changing the subject,” he said with a smile. “But sure.”

  The outside tables were all taken so we settled for one inside. A small shelf in the corner contained a television, set to a soccer game,
the volume so low I doubted anyone besides us could hear it. We ordered two lattes and sat back in silence. Everything Mateo had said outside was true. I was pushing everyone away like I did when I didn’t want to get hurt. It was a habit I formed after Ian left me all those years ago, a habit I wasn’t sure I wanted to break, especially now. Christian was the last person I expected to hurt me but I was wrong. He hurt more than Ian ever did because I loved him more.

  “Lily, do you plan to feed anytime soon?” Mateo interrupted my thoughts.

  “I don’t know, maybe…”

  “Look,” he pointed at the television where they cut away from the game and an announcer stood with a microphone in his hands. He stood on a narrow street, a bare mountain visible in the background, a group of people in typical Peruvian dress standing off to the side. The words “Breaking news” flashed at the bottom of the screen in Spanish.

  “We are standing on a street in the northern town of Chulacanas to bring you breaking news,” the announcer said holding his ear piece tight against his ear. “In the early hours of the morning, farmer Tito Ayala walked to his chicken coop to collect his eggs. He noticed his barn door open and went to investigate, assuming his cows had gotten out. Instead, he found two of his three cows still in the barn, both dead. When he noticed the third was missing, he walked around to the back of the barn, finding a man there instead of his cow.” The announcer paused and looked at the old man who appeared next to him. “Señor Ayala, what did you see?” He held the microphone to the man’s mouth.

  “A man lay on the ground, next to a barrel of water I keep there for the cows. His eyes were open so I thought he was alive. No, he was dead.” The man opened his eyes wide and stuck his tongue out to the side. “Like this.”

  The announcer tried not to laugh. “There you have it. The unidentified body of a man in his mid-thirties to early forties was found this morning along with the two bodies of the cows. There were no visible signs of a struggle.”