by Mona Love
“Disgusting,” Secret whispered as she bunched her stomach fat together in her hands. “Stretch marks, fat, cellulite, all of this shit has to go. David, you are going to love me again when this is all said and done,” she murmured.
Secret jumped and whirled around when the door swung open.
“Hola, I’m Dr. Mungia,” the doctor said cheerfully as he rushed into the room.
“I . . . I’m Secret,” she stammered, thanks to her nervousness.
“Relax. Relax. I’m going to take good care of you,” Dr. Mungia said with his thick accent. “Now let’s see how much work we need to do.”
Secret trembled as the doctor touched her body. She winced as he lifted her flabby breasts and grunted. She held her breath as he ran his hands down her stomach and pinched the loose skin, lifted it up, and let it go again.
Dr. Mungia hummed and humphed as he urged Secret to turn around. He whistled when he looked at her butt.
“Okay, here’s what we will do,” Dr. Mungia said as Secret slowly turned back around to face him. “I will take the fat from your stomach and put it into your glutes. I will pull back the skin here and make you have a waist again. Last, I will lift the breasts and add the silicone,” he said.
Secret let out a long breath. “How many hours will it take? And what will be my recovery time?”
“Ehhh, don’t worry about all of that. When I’m done, you will look so beautiful you won’t even remember any of the work and the recovery,” Dr. Mungia said, smiling brightly and patting Secret on the shoulder.
“Okay. I just want to get it over with so my husband can be happy with me again,” Secret said, parting a nervous grin.
“I am going to make magic happen. Your life will change forever,” Dr. Mungia said. His words had more finality than Secret could’ve ever imagined.
* * *
“Oh, my God, Secret. This week has been the most nerve-racking shit I’ve ever been through,” Andrea said, grabbing her cousin so hard she hurt her.
“Ow!” Secret screamed out.
“Oh, shit! I’m sorry,” Andrea said, jumping back.
She was right. They’d kept Secret in the house and away from Andrea for seven days while she recovered from the surgery. It was finally time for them to fly back, but Secret could still hardly move she was in so much pain.
“How are you supposed to fly like this?” Andrea asked on the verge of tears.
“I have a pillow, and it’s just four hours. I won’t die,” Secret said.
“Don’t say that shit, Secret. Don’t even say that word,” Andrea scolded her.
The hours of the flight were the longest of Secret’s life. She’d taken at least six Percocet pills during that short span of time, and she still felt pain rocking through her body. Her head felt light, and her heart raced. If she didn’t know any better, Secret would’ve thought she was actually about to die. That’s how horrible she felt.
“Let everyone else get off first,” Secret told Andrea when their plane landed back at John F. Kennedy airport. “I need to take my time.”
“Okay, boo. I got you,” Andrea said sympathetically. She could tell her cousin was not feeling well. Andrea was worried. She’d noticed that Secret’s skin color looked a little ashen and a fine coat of sweat covered Secret’s face. Andrea said a silent prayer that her cousin would be okay.
When they finally made it outside, Secret inhaled the fresh air. The fine sheen of sweat covering her face made the air feel cool against her skin. She swallowed hard and inched her way to a bench in front of the terminal.
“You want to just wait here while I go get the car?” Andrea asked.
“No. No. I’m okay to go to the car. I just want to get out of here,” Secret huffed as if every word hurt to come out.
“Okay, whenever you’re ready,” Andrea replied.
Secret planted her hands on either side of her legs and pushed against the bench to get enough strength to stand up. As soon as she got to her feet, she felt like the weight of the world had landed on her shoulders. The next thing she knew, her world went black.
Secret was dead. She was sure of it. Blue ringed flashes of white light behind her eyelids, searing daggers of pain pounding through her entire body, and the fact that she could no longer hear anything except her own fading breathing all told her she was dead. Secret’s body curled into a fetal position. Blood soaked the front of her white sweatpants.
Andrea screamed like a banshee. “Oh, my God! Help me! Help me!” Andrea cradled Secret’s head on her lap and screeched for someone to call an ambulance. The back of her throat burned from screaming, but she would not stop until she heard the sirens in the distance.
“Secret! Please! Stay with me! Please!” Andrea pleaded through tears.
* * *
Secret’s eyes fluttered open. The raging fire in her throat and pounding between her ears let her know she was not dead. No, she was very much alive, as each part of her body made her painfully aware. Secret immediately started gagging. She kicked her right foot and lifted her left hand to grab the thick breathing tube that ran down her throat. It was the culprit making her gag. It was taped in place around her mouth, making it impossible to pull out. The heart monitor next to her bed sounded off with a high-pitched scream. Two nurses seemed to materialize out of thin air as they rushed to Secret’s bedside.
David jumped to his feet. “What’s happening?” he huffed, panicked.
Andrea was on her feet and moving toward Secret within seconds. Not for long. David and Andrea were both pushed aside by the rushing nurses.
“What’s happening?” Andrea screamed, her head moving side to side frantically.
“Please! Move away! We have to treat her!” a nurse chastised Andrea and David, pushing them back from Secret’s bed.
Andrea curled her hands into fists. “Bitch, don’t push me again.”
David grabbed Andrea around her waist.
“No, David! That’s my fucking cousin lying there.” Andrea started to cry. “They can’t just turn me away like that. I want to know what’s happening to her.”
The nurse drew one side of the curtain around Secret’s bed, shutting David and Andrea out.
“Mrs. Johnson, it’s okay. Shhh, it’s okay. Don’t do that now. You’ll injure yourself,” a short, chunky nurse with calm eyes and skin the color of coffee beans comforted Secret.
As she held Secret’s arms down, the taller, redheaded, green-eyed nurse stuck her head out from behind the curtain and huffed at David and Andrea, “We’re going to have to ask you both to step out.”
“I’m not going nowhere!” Andrea boomed.
David tightened his grasp and tugged her toward the doorway. “C’mon, Andrea. If they call security, there’ll be attention we don’t want,” David said as he pulled Andrea, heels dragging, out of the door.
“I got her arms down. You tie,” the short nurse barked as her partner returned to the bedside. They finally got Secret’s wrists tied to the metal poles on the bed. It was for her own good, they had coaxed. They told Secret that if she pulled the tube out, she could do permanent damage to her vocal cords.
Secret tried to speak, but it was in vain. Drool leaked out of the left side of her mouth, and it felt like she’d drunk molten lava each time she tried to say something.
“I know. I know. Breathing tubes are a bitch when you’re awake, but that blood clot you had in that lung is worse, so try to relax and let the machine help you. I’ll give you something to knock you back out,” the nicer nurse said, comforting her and patting Secret’s arm.
“They always go away for this plastic surgery stuff and come back with all sorts of complications,” one nurse whispered to the other as if Secret couldn’t hear them.
“Mm!” Secret moaned, trying to lift her head up. Her eyes were stretched to their limits, and she was gagging against the tube again. The heart monitors went from a steady blip to a scream once more.
The head nurse came in, hands on her hips. �
�What’s going on in here?”
Secret kept moaning.
“Something upset her,” the short nurse said as if she didn’t know that it was her words that had upset Secret.
Warm tears flowed from Secret’s eyes, pooling in her ears. She strained against the arm restraints. Her entire body tensed. Sharp, heated stabs daggered through her back and shoulder with every movement.
“I think she just needs to be alone for the rest of the night,” the short nurse said, nodding toward the door. “She also needs a sedative.”
Secret relaxed her head on the pillow.
“That’s it. Just relax, and let’s hope they didn’t do too much damage to your body,” the nurse comforted her as she plunged a sedative into Secret’s intravenous line.
David followed Andrea into the hospital waiting room. “How could you let her do this?” David asked as Andrea slumped into a chair.
David could see the strain on Andrea’s face as soon as the question left his mouth. Andrea wore pain, regret, and anger like a hard mask. She had tried everything to convince Secret not to do the surgery. Every time Andrea thought about the powerless position she had been put in by her cousin, all the hairs on her arm stood up. It had all been so that Secret could win back David’s love, another factor that made Andrea’s insides boil.
“You have some fucking nerve,” Andrea said through clenched teeth, her fists curled at her sides.
“I never told her to get surgery, Andrea. She told me she was going on a girls’ trip,” David said, pushing his pointer finger in Andrea’s direction.
She rolled her eyes at him, and her nostrils flared. “You got to be fucking kidding me!” Andrea spat, bolting up out of the chair.
David shook his head. “I’ve got to be kidding you? I would’ve never approved of her going to a fucking third-world country for plastic surgery.”
“You didn’t have to fucking approve, David. All of your insults and neglect and rejection is the reason she did it. You’re the whole fucking reason she did it,” Andrea boomed, getting in David’s face.
David pinched the bridge of his nose. His mind was muddled with thoughts. Was this really his fault? David felt weak, drained from everything that had happened. He was running on only a few hours of sleep because he had just returned from a business trip himself.
David flopped into one of the small waiting room chairs, physically and mentally exhausted. He couldn’t even stand to look at Andrea. She was probably right. Secret probably had been trying to impress him. David understood Andrea’s anger. She had been Secret’s right hand for their entire lives.
Secret and Andrea had come up together from childhood years. As cousins, they were also best friends. They had been through a lot together. David hadn’t always agreed with how much time his wife spent with Andrea, but he understood that he couldn’t come between what they had. They had genuine love for one another.
David knew Andrea would never forgive herself for allowing Secret to go out of the country for the surgery. Especially if Secret didn’t recover.
“I tried so hard to convince her not to do it. I begged her. I told her how beautiful she was,” Andrea said through tears.
David was silent. He really felt Andrea’s hurt.
“Let me ask you a question. Did you ever stop and think about how hard it was on Secret going from a size zero to almost a size fourteen after having your children? I’m just saying, you may think I’m just her bigmouthed cousin and that I’m in your business, I accept that, but I think it was so fucked up how you started acting after she sacrificed everything for you and those kids. Secret told me that you were real particular about how you like her to look, but guess what, God had other plans. Now look! Now she’s lying in there fighting for her life all because you’re a shallow piece of shit who couldn’t love her for who she is!” Andrea trumpeted. Her shrill voice had cut the silence that hovered over the room.
David was on his feet again. He didn’t have to take this. “What goes on in my house is really none of your business. Don’t take it out on me because you were stupid enough to allow her to do this. We will talk about this shit among ourselves, without you, when my wife recovers,” David said forcefully, although somewhere in his mind, he knew Andrea had a good point, one that he’d considered as soon as he learned about Secret’s surgery.
Lately, things had been strained between him and Secret. He’d been cruel sometimes. David shook it off. He couldn’t think about that now. He had to keep his mind clear so he could focus on his wife and kids.
“You can’t shut me up, David. I know everything. And maybe this will teach you a lesson. I know more about you than you think I know,” Andrea added.
David was growing weary of Andrea’s mouth. If she weren’t Secret’s cousin, he would’ve thrown her out of the hospital. Andrea was always in the middle of their lives, and if he didn’t like her before, David despised her ass now.
David’s stomach knotted. He didn’t even want to think about what Andrea was referring to.
“Oh, what? You think Secret didn’t tell me about all those nights out? All your so-called business trips? Or about your cruel words and names you call her? I told her not to get the fucking surgery. What she needed to do was divorce your ass and take you for everything you got,” Andrea snapped, rolling her eyes indignantly.
David closed his eyes, and his jaw rocked feverishly. He pictured himself grabbing Andrea by her neck and choking her until she passed out. It seemed to David that was the only thing that was going to shut her ass up.
David shook his head from left to right, trying to clear his mind for now. Andrea’s words settled in his mind like newly planted seeds. Something told David that once Secret got better, it wasn’t going to be life as usual. He started to think about his next move before she could move first.
Chapter 3
Secret spent two weeks in the hospital. The complications from her plastic surgery were pretty serious. She’d developed blood clots on the plane ride, and one had traveled to her left lung and collapsed it. If she had been alone or if it had traveled to her heart, she would’ve been dead.
Secret was ashamed to look at her botched body, too. The fake plastic surgeon had made things worse. Her stomach was not only still flabby, but it had a huge scar running across the middle. Her butt cheeks were big and lumpy from where he’d injected fat and some foreign substance. Secret spent her days depressed and high on painkillers. She couldn’t stand for David to look at her, and most of the time she didn’t want to talk to him or deal with the kids. Secret felt like her life was over.
The sound of the doorbell ringing roused Secret from a sound, drug-induced sleep. She opened her eyes in response to the shrill sound of her doorbell. Groaning, Secret looked over at the empty spot on the other side of her bed where David should’ve been lying. For some reason, she was expecting him to be there, but the neatly tucked sheets and untouched pillow quickly brought her back to reality: he was away on yet another business trip. That had become his regular since Secret’s surgery mishap. It was as if he couldn’t stand to be around her or look at her now. Her whole plan for having the surgery had backfired.
The bell rang again, jolting her. She rolled over with her face drawn tightly into a frown. Somebody was really ringing her damn bell like they were the gotdamn police or something. Secret squinted to look at her cell phone for the time. Shit! It was only eight o’clock in the morning, and she wasn’t expecting any visitors. Besides, the painkillers mixed with sleep aides she’d been taking since her hospital release had not fully worn off, which left her still feeling tired and drained. The bell rang again, this time with more urgency.
“Oh, hell no. I know these Jehovah’s Witnesses done lost their damn minds. This shit better be life or death. Ringing my gotdamn bell like this,” Secret huffed and grumbled as she threw her legs over the side of the bed. She grabbed her favorite fuzzy red robe and headed down the steps toward the front door of her home. When she made it to the bot
tom of the stairs, she didn’t bother to peek out of the glass. She just snatched the door open and got ready to curse somebody out. Secret opened her mouth to cuss, but the person in front of her beat her to the punch.
“Mrs. Secret Ann Johnson?” a short, fat man asked as he looked her up and down suspiciously.
“Who the hell wants to know?” she snapped, surveying the man suspiciously herself.
“Here you go, ma’am,” the man said, extending his hand to give Secret a thick manila envelope addressed to her with no return address.
Secret grabbed the envelope without thinking, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What’s this shit?” Secret asked, surveying the sealed envelope. “And that’s why you were ringing my bell like your ass was on fire?”
“It’s a package, ma’am. Now if you’d just sign here,” the man said, rushing her. “I’m just the messenger. Don’t shoot the messenger.”
Secret sucked her teeth at this stupid comment. “Whatever,” she mumbled as she scribbled her name down without reading. Her mind was still fuzzy between her drugs and sleep.
“Who sent this?” Secret finally asked, turning the package over in her hands a couple of times. The man was already down the front steps of her home before she could fully get her question out.
“Ma’am, you’ve been served,” the fat bastard called out, smirking as he squeezed his fat form into a little black Honda Civic and squealed away from the curb.
Secret opened her mouth to call out to him and ask him what he meant, but he was gone before her mind could even make a complete sentence. She noticed her nosy neighbor, Mrs. Denton, across the street, watching her.
“What the hell? Nosy ass,” Secret grumbled and slammed her door.
Once inside Secret ripped the seal on the envelope. She noticed a thick set of papers. She pulled them out and began reading. Secret’s heart sped up, and her entire body became engulfed in heat.
“‘Petition for Divorce,’” she murmured as she read the heading on the first page of the thick stack.