Stay True

by C B Jean

  There is no sign of them here at all, no clothes strewn about, nor the sounds of them bickering as they would get ready for the day. No idle chit chat, no sound of Killian’s jokes nor Jackson yelling at him to shut it.

  I clutch the sheet tighter to my chest. “Guys? Luke? Kills? Jackson? Are you guys there? This isn’t funny!” I call out. My voice is rough from a night of sleeping soundly but is panicked and high pitched.

  Did they leave to fetch something? Did someone take them?! Are they missing while I slept soundly?! This better not be a joke or I will kick some major male ass. I jerk out of the giant bed wrapping the sheet around my body to cover my nudity drowning in the size of it. I struggle to the bathroom door peering in, hopeful they are in here. Nothing. Empty. Only the drip drip of water. I run to the balcony windows and throw them open shivering in the chilly morning air. Nothing here either. Fear and panic starts trickling into my nerves.

  Don’t panic, don’t panic. I’m sure there is a reasonable explanation as to why they aren’t here. They wouldn’t dare leave me alone after yesterday… would they? Did they finally decide to leave me after getting the key deciding they didn’t need me anymore? My heart breaks at that thought of them ditching me, leaving me. Maybe it was all a ruse and I feel for it. Hook, line and sinker. A greater need to find weapons overwhelms me and I oblige.

  I search widely around for my clothes, noticing they aren’t here either. Is this some sick joke where they dich me and take all my items? Unbelievable. I try to open the door to our room and the jiggle tells me its locked from the outside. What is going on? My eyes grow heavy and wet, tears building. My breaths start coming in short pants. I shuffle to the bathroom in search of any article of clothing. The closets and dressers only had underthings, dresses and shoes. None suitable for me to fight or run in. I did manage to swipe a stiletto heel, if anything I can use it to defend myself until I get my sword and dagger back. Just try me, I’d find a way to cause major harm with a shoe. No way in flip would they leave me voluntary. They must have been kidnapped and the nappers will be coming back to me. The idea of being alone is crushing me.

  I lean against the bathroom wall, still holding my sheet up and a red heel in the other feeling my resolve crumble. I don’t notice myself slipping down the wall slumping against it as I struggle to inhale and control myself. Would they leave me? Did they finally realize I’m not worth it? That I’m broken beyond repair? Tears stream down my face as I give in.

  I wish I was home. I wish I could see my Dad. I want to go home and drink coffee and sleep for a week straight in my apartment. I want to get a cat. I wish mom was here. Hiccups rack my chest and I hold the heel tighter till my hand turns white. I look down at it and study it, the pointy heel in the red glittery fabric. Is there a chance I could end this all myself…? No. I mustn’t ever think thoughts like that again.

  I hear the door to my chamber open and loud voices enter through it. I look around wildly searching for an escape route. My eyes glance to the balcony. If I can make it there in time, I could fling myself over it, climb my way down the castle walls. In a sheet? Unlikely. I’ll do it naked if I must.

  My ears are ringing and my vision spotty. I hear my name being called but I don’t reply. I just continue to sit against that bathroom wall freaking out. I can’t move, my body frozen. A tall, large figure stands in the doorway of the bathroom and my heart jumps in a panic. He calls out, I’m not sure if he’s yelling to me or one of the other companions that came in with him. Another figure pushes past him and speeds towards me. I yelp and try to scramble away on the floor, holding my heel out defensively. My vision is dark, and I can’t focus on his face. He reaches a handout to me slowly and gently pries the heel out of my hands. I can’t even think straight as to think about attacking this man, I can’t even breathe.

  He grabs my small hand in his, my other still clutching my sheet and shaking. He rubs my knuckles slowly and is that singing I hear? Is this man singing? Confusion warps my face, the fear slowly melting away. He places my hand on his chest. I feel as he lets in a deep breath his chest rising, then lets it out slowly. Again, another breath, then out slowly. I try to match it, his presence calming. Safe. I notice his lips moving but I don’t know what he’s saying. My hearing is static.

  Slowly my vision returns and my chest relaxes as I take in my surroundings. What’s happening?

  Bathroom. Cold. Floor. Sheet. Man. Air. Fear. Alone. Panic. Singing. Warm.

  I look at the man again, his worried face familiar. Dark black hair. Blue eyes. I know him. Right? I continue to study him as his lips continue to sing. Every second I can hear clearer, the ringing in my head vanishing. A slow low tune, deep in his throat. I can’t tell if its supposed to be a happy or sad tune but its enchanting and a bit haunting.

  I can’t take my eyes of his dark blue ones, they have mine trapped and I’m unable to look away. I’m not scared anymore. Safe. Protracted. Loved.

  Slowly his singing ends and we continue to stare at each other. His brows fold with worry and stress. Aren’t they supposed to be happy? Why isn’t he happy?

  Slowly he talks to me, my hand still on his warm chest as he rubs my knuckles. “Hey there Baby Blue, you’re okay now, you’re okay. Do you know who I am? Do you know where you are?”

  Confusion etches my face, the tears now dried on it. I’m in a bathroom, in my room? In a castle. I was with my friends? No… mine? Mine what?

  Mine. It all hits me at once. The castle, the key. The challenge. Aiden. Luke, Kills, Jackson. Mine.

  My eyes widen as I look at Kills. I’ve never seen him look so scared. That was a really bad panic attack. I shouldn’t have doubted him, them. They would never leave me.

  Without warning I throw my arms around his neck with a cry and squeeze him to me in a death grip. The force making an oomph from him when I tackle him. I sit in his lap as I cry into his neck. His strong arms wrap me up tighter and he leans his head into my neck breathing me in. I want to apologize. I need to tell him I’m sorry. I’m such a burden.

  “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry.” I wail into him as I start mumbling incoherent sentences. He doesn’t say anything or try to stop me, he just rocks me back and forth in his arms as I cry. He starts a low hum in this throat, the sound easing me. I don’t know how long we sit like that on the cold bathroom floor. Me in a sheet in my man’s arms crying after telling him whatever I was crying about. Eventually the tears stop, the hiccups subside, and I’m left with less of an aching heart inside me. He picks me up still without a word and carries me to the tub. It’s filled once again with hot steamy water, but someone managed to fill it with sweet smelling bubbles. He manages to unwrap me from the sheet, and I let him as he sets me in the water. All I do is sit there as I let him bathe me. The hot water seeps into my tired body, my muscles relaxing.

  He gently wets my hair then rubs product in it, making sure to rub my head all the way to the tips of my long hair. I once thought about cutting it short, but I could never bring myself to do it. Plus, all three of my guys have told me multiple times how much they enjoy it and would be devastated if I did. He manages to wash every part of me till I’m squeaky clean then lifts me straight out of the tub into his arms once more. I instantly douse the front of him in the soapy water, but he doesn’t seem to mind. Instead he carries me over to the bed soaking wet and sets me into the middle of it. I shut my eyes and hang my head low, my wet hair dripping around me.

  Someone places a soft robe over my shoulders and wraps me up. The bed dips behind me as someone sits placing me into their lap. A towel covers my head and they start to dry my hair, collecting the moisture.

  Embarrassment. Shame. Sadness. Fear. Panic. Love. I keep going thought the motions. No one has uttered a single word yet. I’m waiting or the ball to drop before I address it. I probably scared them, flip I scared myself. Not one of us knows how to address what just happened.

  Once my hair is done being dried, I lean against whoever it is enjoying the company
, no longer alone. I smell leather and peaches. Luke. My silent guardian. I don’t dare look anyone in the eyes. I can feel all three of them watching me, giving me support, waiting till I decide I’m ready.

  Just that moment my stomach growls loudly and I hear a chuckle. Right on cue someone shoves warm, flaky bread into my hand and I only stare at it for a moment before I devour it like an animal. Jam dribbles down my chin. I don’t know what it is but flip that’s good. I don’t even taste it as I chow down, but I do enjoy the smell of the pastry.

  Its gone within seconds. Then another one is given to me. Then another. And another. I sigh after I finish them all now full, a short burp escaping. My face flames and I try to hide but I hear chuckles all around me and someone kisses my head.

  I finally look up meeting concerned and anxious faces of Kills and Jackson. Luke behind me, wipes the remaining jam and crumbs off my face with his thumb. I look at them as shame floods my face. I wonder what I look like right now.

  “Sweetness… what happened?” Jackson says softly sitting at the edge of the bed facing me. I nervously bounce on the bed between Luke’s legs as I look away to the side out the balcony window.

  Ugh. Here it goes.

  “Umm… I woke up alone and I panicked. I thought you guys got kidnapped or decided to leave me because you don’t wanna be with me….” I trail off, my voice breaking.

  I shuffle nervously again waiting for the fallout. Luke reassuringly rubs my back and plays with my hair and I try to relax into his touch.

  “Honey… we would never. We only left to get you breakfast to surprise you. Clearly that was a terrible idea for all of us to go. I understand why you thought that. I’m sorry we left you all alone, I didn’t think you would be awake so early after yesterday.” Jackson smiles lightly at me, easing my worry.

  I crawl over to him and wrap my arms around his warm chiseled chest. I snuggle into him.

  “It’s okay, I’m sorry I doubted you. And for making you guys worry. And for crying all the fucking time. I swear I’m not usually like this.” I sniffle, the words muffled by his chest.

  Jacksons face lifts in surprise with a chuckle, an eyebrow raised and a playful twinkle in his eyes. I frown not getting it.

  “Sweetness… did you just swear?” he teases.

  “Shush. Your ruining the moment.” I whisper with a slight grin.

  Of course, Kills pops in with his oh so funny commentary. That’s sarcasm by the way. “No, you’re right Jackson, she did swear None of that ‘flipping’ nonsense she usually says.” He pokes at me riling me up with a cheeky grin. So cute, I can see his wittle dimples.

  “Don’t make me kick your ass Kills, you know I can.” I give him a wink. “Anyways… what’s the agenda for today? Next temple? That stupid ball thing downstairs? Weapon and magic practice?” I ask hopeful clasping my hands. I have some nervous energy to burn and feel as if I need to be doing something. Or it could be from the insta sugar high from my breakfast. Luke behind me grunts in displeasure and wraps a large arm around my waist dragging me back into his chest and trapping me there. I try to wiggle away but I can’t, and I huff exasperated when I give up. Jackson lets out a deep chuckle and crosses his arms over his chest looking at me all commanderly and stuff. Yum. Him being bossy turns me on.

  “Nothing.”

  “What? What do you mean nothing?” I ask confused trying to cross my own arms over Luke’s beefy forearms with a pout. It’s kind of hard to look intimidating with wet hair, dressed in a white robe and a pouty face while being locked in the arms of his brother. Its more adorable then anything I’d say. Or I look like a drowned rat, but either way.

  “We don’t have anything planned for today. All you have to do is rest. No thinking about the next temple or ‘he who shall not be named,’ not even your weapons or horse. Just relax. You need it girl.”

  I pout. “Not even my horse? What if I wanted to see her?” I ask playing the puppy dog eyes look and pouty lip. Trust me, works every time.

  Jacksons face ticks, trying to keep a serious face on. It’s not working that well. We keep our eyes glued to each other. He doesn’t last ten seconds in our silent stand off before he cracks groaning, and I giggle into a wide grin. So whipped.

  “Alright, you can see your horse. If you promise to take it easy and relax for today. Tonight, we will go to the ball thingy and we will head out in the morning. No more stressing about us leaving or any trouble. Reelaaxx. Capeesh?” He waves his hand anxiously around while he talks, and I salute him army style.

  “Yes sir!” I giggle.

  “Damn… she’s got him wrapped around her finger. Actually... we all are. And do I mind? Hell to the nooo.” I hear Killian whisper to the side clearly talking to himself. I feel Luke behind me grunt his agreement and I raise an eyebrow. I totally do not!

  “Now that’s taken care of… what the flip happened to my clothes?” I demand looking between all three of them, my arms crossed once again.

  Killian reaches into a bag on the floor next to him and pulls out a new set of clothes for me it appears. I clap in glee and scramble off Luke’s lap. He lets out a groan of protest and tries to catch me, but he only manages to rip the robe off me so I’m naked again as I spring off the bed. That works… I guess.

  They all look at me with glowing eyes, as if I’m a piece of meat or a delicious treat. I decide to tease them and cross my arms under my chest pressing my breasts together and up. I hear someone groan.

  “Now now Luke, if you wanted me naked, all you had to do was ask.” I say coyly shaking my finger at him. I reach for the set of clothes Kills set out for me. I need to thank him for calming me down earlier. What would I do without him? Without any of them really?

  I first find a pair of black panties and matching corset laid out on top. Lace of course and a thong. Really Kills? I raise an eyebrow at him. He just shyly shrugs and looks smug. I put on the underwear and struggle to wrap and tie the corset vest around my chest and waist. It’s so flipping tight!

  I reach for a new pair of hunting leathers, this time they are in black and a bit tighter than my old pair. Shorter as well? Oh god… it’s a skirt… and a flipping tiny one. I manage to pull it on, but I jump and wiggle it up my ass as I tease the boys. They watch, their eyes glued excitedly, and I wiggle, bounce and pant to get it on dramatically. It doesn’t even come to mid-thigh in the front, but my ass is covered as it reaches to my ankle in the back slopping around my figure like a cape but still leaving lots of leg exposed. Its slanted sideways and on my hip, I tie the fabric together. Next I slip on the matching leather stockings rising above my knees. It has straps at the top. Straps?

  Oh, hell no… they attach to my underwear and corset as a garter belt. Rolling my eyes at Killians pleasure I strap it together. He got me knee high black boots as well, with plated armor on the knees and feet. A leather belt with pouches attached for my supplies and weapons. I’m squealing in glee with all the places I can stick knifes on me now.

  The corset leaves my shoulders bare as it wraps around my neck and a face wrap that I can raise that only leaves my eyes uncovered to hide myself when I’m being all rogue. I’m starting to feel like Assassins Creed. I also slip on leather sleeves that also work as enforced gloves that come up to my shoulders, while my right shoulder is covered by an armored shoulder plate. God, I feel like a warrior princess badass.

  I stand with my hand on my hip waiting for the guys approval. Approval I indeed get with hooded eyes and heated looks. I just now notice they are all tricked out in matching armor to me, but it leaves their muscly arms exposed when their cloaks aren’t on. God damn we are a good-looking bunch! They must have really gone all out to get new outfits. All ready to go.

  I’m practically prancing to the door. “Let’s go let’s go! I have to check on my horse!” The guys share exasperated looks and groan as I race out the door. My footsteps echo down the stairs and into the hall, mixed with my giggles and panting as my men call my name behind me telling me to slo
w down. They are essentially running through the castle to catch up to me as I race out the castle doors and to the stables. It’s a bit chilly outside and I was glad I decided to grab my fur cloak on my way out the door. I hear my horse nicker as I get close. I reach the stables and go inside the lit and warm building. I can already smell the fresh hay and stale scent of horses. I run into a force field when I turn the door and a gloved hand covers my mouth before I can scream.

  Chapter 19

  JACKSON

  We race down the corridor trying to catch up to our girl. Damn she’s fast for a little thing. Her giggles and laughs echo down the hallway as she taunts us to hurry our asses up. My watch lights up with an incoming call. I slow down and motion for my brothers to continue to catch up to her. I notice the ID and its my insider for Horizion and old army friend. Perhaps he has new intel for us.