Rosanna's Gift

by Susan Lantz Simpson

  “There’s that beautiful boppli.” Mary Hertzler didn’t waste any time seeking them out.

  Rosanna smiled. “Hello, Mary. The scholars put on a nice program, ain’t so?”

  “For sure. I remember when my buwe participated in programs. It doesn’t seem so long ago, but of course, it’s been quite a while. They grow up so fast.”

  The wistful look that crossed Mary’s face almost made Rosanna sad, but Mollie’s tug on her kapp string brought a smile instead. “I had just been thinking that Mollie will be up there reciting before I know it, even though I’d like to keep her safe in my arms.”

  “Ach, Rosanna, they do have to grow up. But we can certainly enjoy the growing-up years.” Mary reached out to tickle Mollie’s chin and was instantly rewarded with a giggle. “Would you like me to take this one off your hands for a few minutes so you can mill about and get something to eat?”

  Rosanna didn’t really want to relinquish her boppli, but she didn’t want to disappoint Mary, who clearly itched to hold her. “Sure. I’ll grab a couple of cookies and look at Sadie’s Katie’s, and James’ work. I’ll only be a few minutes.”

  “Take your time.” Mary immediately began clucking and cooing to Mollie.

  Rosanna hesitated for a moment but knew Mollie would be well cared for. Mary would make a terrific grossmammi one day. She wandered around checking out the colorful artwork and neat penmanship displayed on the walls. She made a mental note to tell the teacher what a fine job the scholars had done with the program.

  “Are you looking for anything in particular?”

  Rosanna jumped. Her hand flew to her chest to pat her thumping heart. “Ach, Paul. You startled me.”

  “I’m sorry. I guess you didn’t hear me call your name.”

  “I didn’t. It’s a bit noisy in here, and I was lost in thought.”

  “Sadie’s work?” Paul nodded to the paper hanging in front of them.

  “Jah. Her handwriting is improving. I tried working with her at home, but she got easily distracted. At school, I’m sure she has to sit still until she completes her assignments.”

  “That can be hard for little ones.”

  “Are you speaking from experience?”

  “I’m afraid I was one of those scholars who had a thousand other things to do rather than sit and practice writing legibly.”

  “I believe you’ve learned patience over the years.”

  “I’d like to think so. Where is Mollie this evening?”

  “I’ll give you three guesses.”

  “I’m sure I’ll only need one. My mamm has her, ain’t so?”

  “Exactly right.”

  “That wasn’t too hard to figure out. Did you get some refreshments yet?”

  “Not yet.”

  “Would you like something to eat or drink?”

  “Maybe I’ll get a cookie.”

  Paul took her arm and steered her through the throng of people. His manners and concern always made her feel so special. From the corner of her eye, she glimpsed Frannie threading her way through the crowd to reach Henry. Surprisingly, that once-familiar pain did not pierce her heart. Had she let go of that dream? If the wound healed so quickly, would it have been love, or anything akin to it, in the first place?

  Rosanna shrugged off thoughts of Henry. She’d made a mistake, pure and simple. Who hadn’t made a mistake? She would be extra careful from here on out.

  “Would you like a drink?” Paul passed Rosanna a paper napkin and reached for a Styrofoam cup.

  “Nee, I’ll grab a couple of chocolate chip cookies.” She selected two plump ones and wrapped them in her napkin. While Paul made his selection, she turned to scan the room to make sure Mollie was still fine. Mary caught her eye, smiled, and nodded. Rosanna relaxed, until she caught a glimpse of Emma’s ashen face. What could be wrong?

  Chapter Nineteen

  Rosanna’s heart thundered when she realized Emma was headed directly toward her. Had something happened to Mamm or Daed or one of the little ones? Emma’s grim expression sent bolts of fear and dread shooting through her entire body. “Something is wrong.”

  “Huh? What did you say, Rosanna?”

  “Look at Emma. Something is very wrong.” Emma pushed past a group of giggling girls and strode straight to Rosanna. “What’s happened?” Rosanna could hardly get words past the lump blocking her throat.

  “Th-there’s a girl outside.”

  Emma grabbed Rosanna’s free hand and squeezed so hard Rosanna feared her bones would snap. “A girl?” Why would that be so troubling?

  “An Englisch girl.” Emma panted as if she’d just run around the school building three times. “She’s looking for a boppli.”

  “A boppli?” Rosanna clenched her other hand into a tight fist, crushing the cookies in the paper napkin.

  “You had better kumm see.” Emma let go of Rosanna’s hand and tugged her arm.

  “Why me?” Her voice emerged as a croak, but she couldn’t clear her throat to change that.

  “She’s Englisch,” Emma repeated. “I doubt she’s looking for an Amish baby. She must be looking for Mollie.”

  “Mollie is an Amish baby.”

  “You know what I mean. You’d better kumm now.” Emma tugged harder on Rosanna’s arm.

  “Do you want me to go out there with you?” Paul leaned down to speak directly into Rosanna’s ear.

  Rosanna couldn’t form a coherent thought, much less a coherent sentence. Mollie was her boppli. The adoption would be final soon. She stumbled over her own feet and would have fallen flat on her face if Paul hadn’t caught her.

  “It will be okay.” Paul kept his grip on her arm.

  Rosanna plodded toward the door on lead feet. Her brain screamed at her to snatch Mollie from Mary’s arms and hide. But she had to see what this stranger wanted. Maybe Emma had misunderstood and the girl didn’t have any business here at all. She reached a shaky hand out and yanked the door open.

  The girl jerked around to face Rosanna. From the light behind her, Rosanna could see the girl’s hair was blonde, instead of brown like Jane’s. But even in the dim light cast by the lamps, Rosanna could tell the blonde color came from a bottle and couldn’t possibly have been a natural hue. Her blue eyes, though, matched Jane’s—and Mollie’s.

  “Hi.” The girl, who now appeared older than Rosanna had originally thought, cracked her chewing gum before maneuvering it to the back of her mouth. She thrust out one hand with long, pointy, red fingernails. “I’m Kandis Kottyn. They call me Kandi Kottyn, get it?”

  Rosanna stared, openmouthed.

  “You know, cotton candy. You’ve heard of that?”

  “Jah. I know what cotton candy is.”

  “Okay. You might have heard of me. I’m an actress and a dancer. I’ve performed, mainly dancing, in lots of clubs in DC and an off-off-really-off Broadway show.”

  “I’ve never heard of you.”

  “I guess not. Anyway, I’m on my way to the big time, you know, superstardom. I heard my little sister lived here for a while.”

  “Your schweschder?”

  “Jane.”

  “J-Jane?”

  “Yeah. And I understand she had a baby.”

  “Wh-why would you kumm here?” Paul’s grip on Rosanna’s arm tightened. She had the overwhelming urge to fling herself into his arms and bury her head in his chest.

  “I believe Jane came here. I don’t mean here to this particular place. I mean this area.” She gestured to their surroundings. “I’m sorry to interrupt your party, by the way.”

  “It isn’t a party. Tonight was the school program.”

  “Whatever.” She apparently freed her gum to snap it once more before storing it again on a back tooth. “In a letter Jane wrote me—come to think of it, I think it was the only letter she ever wrote me—she said she found some people she admired. She said she was finally going to do the right thing.”

  “Wh-where is Jane?”

  “She passed away.�
�

  Rosanna sucked in a sharp breath and swayed. If Paul hadn’t gripped her arm even tighter, she might have dropped to the ground. “What happened?”

  “Janie had always been a sickly little girl, but I thought she’d gotten better. We sort of lost touch there for a while. I’m a bit older, you know. Anyway, I guess that childhood cancer returned.”

  Tears pricked Rosanna’s eyes. Poor Jane. To die so young. She’d said she was sick, but she certainly gave birth like a champ and climbed from a window to escape. She must have relied on determination and willpower. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”

  “Yeah. It’s a shame she had to die so young. The autopsy report said she’d given birth recently. The postmark on her letter was this little Podunk town, I mean, Maryland. I’ve been exploring the area and figured Jane must have been talking about you people when she said she found people she admired.”

  “What do you want with us?” Rosanna’s heart roared in her ears. Surely Paul and Cotton Candy or Candy Cotton could hear it.

  “Was my sister here?”

  Rosanna hesitated. She had to be truthful. “A girl named Jane came here, but Jane is a pretty common name.”

  “Here.” Kandi rummaged through the oversized handbag she pulled off her shoulder. “This picture is a couple years old, but you should be able to tell if it’s the same girl.” She thrust the mangled photograph under Rosanna’s nose.

  Rosanna wanted to lie and say she had never seen such a person, but she couldn’t. That didn’t mean she had to give this gum-smacking dancer her boppli! She raised her chin to look the taller girl in the eye. “It’s hard to be sure in this dim light, but this does look like the same girl who was here.”

  “Did she have a baby?”

  “Jah.”

  “Where is the baby?”

  “I have her. I-I’m adopting her. That’s what Jane wanted. She had legal papers.”

  “A little girl. Janie had a little girl.” Kandi sniffed. “Can I see her?”

  Silent until now, Paul finally spoke up. “Maybe you could meet tomorrow so we don’t interrupt the celebration tonight. Would that be all right?” He looked from one young woman to the other.

  “You won’t run off with the baby?”

  “Of course not. This is our home. I can give you directions to my house and you could drop by tomorrow.”

  “I guess that will have to do. What’s your name?”

  “Rosanna Mast. And this is Paul Hertzler.”

  “What’s the baby’s name?”

  “Mollie.”

  “Mollie. I like that. Does she look like Jane?”

  “She has honey-gold hair and big blue eyes.”

  “Not quite like Jane, huh? Tell me how to find you.”

  Rosanna gave directions and held her breath. Would this woman say she planned to take Mollie?

  Kandi backed away. “Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow, say, ten-ish?”

  “That will be fine.” As fine as anything could be in her world that had suddenly flipped upside down.

  “Here’s my card. This is a picture of me from the play I was in. Great costume, don’t you think?” She didn’t wait for a reply but pointed to her name with one red fingernail. “See Kandi Kottyn. Spelled with Ks to make it fancier. There’s a little bit about me on there, too.”

  Rosanna squinted to make out the picture and barely withheld a gasp at the skimpy outfit. She quickly turned the card over.

  “Thanks for taking care of the kid.” With that, the woman disappeared down the gravel lane to a car parked at the end.

  Kid? Mollie was a precious boppli. Her boppli. Whatever would she do? She wouldn’t have to give Mollie up, would she? Maybe she should find a way to contact that lawyer first thing in the morning. Or should she just wait to hear whatever this Kandi Kottyn said? Surely the woman wouldn’t want an infant around if she traveled around dancing and acting. What kind of life would that be for her sweet Mollie?

  “Are you all right, Rosanna?”

  “Jah. Nee. I . . .” She burst into tears and scarcely noticed Paul had pulled her into his arms.

  * * *

  Paul patted Rosanna’s back as she sobbed against his chest. How wunderbaar it felt to hold her in his arms. He wished the circumstances were different. He wished he knew how to comfort her. “It will be okay, Rosanna.”

  “Wh-what if she t-takes my boppli?”

  “I don’t think she can do that.”

  “Sh-she’s a relative.”

  “But Jane wanted you to have Mollie. I don’t know much about the Englisch laws, but you do have those official papers.”

  Rosanna sniffed and pulled back to look up into his eyes. “Do you think that will be gut enough?”

  “I hope so.”

  “I love Mollie so much.”

  “I know you do. I’ll do whatever I can to help you. I promise.” He would make the sun shine at night if he could if that would please her.

  “Danki, Paul.” Rosanna swiped at her eyes with the back of one hand. As if she suddenly realized she stood within the circle of his arms, she took a giant step backward. “I-I’m sorry.”

  “That’s all right.” Actually it was more than “all right.” It was great. Did she notice how his heart raced? Did any electric current surge through her body as it had his?

  “I-I’d better go back and check on Mollie.”

  “Mamm will take excellent care of her.”

  “I know, but I need to hold her.”

  “I understand.” Paul had a need to hold and protect Rosanna. A desire to protect and care for Mollie, as well, stirred from somewhere in the depths of his soul. “I’m here for you, Rosanna, and will help you. Mollie belongs with you. The Lord Gott gave her to you.”

  “You’re a great freind, Paul.” She reached out to pat his arm.

  Was it remotely possible that he could ever be more to her and to Mollie? Could he ever mean half as much to her as she meant to him?

  Chapter Twenty

  “Give me that spoon, Rosanna. You’re going to stir a hole clear through the pot.” Sarah wrestled the long-handled wooden spoon from Rosanna’s hand. She banged it on the side of the pot to shake off the oatmeal clinging to it. “I believe this is done, unless you’re planning to use it for wallpaper paste.”

  “I’m sorry, Mamm. My mind is off and running.”

  “I’d say it’s run completely away.”

  Rosanna’s sigh carried the weight of the world. “What if this Kandi girl wants to take Mollie? What will I do, Mamm? What if I lose Mollie forever? What if . . . ?”

  Sarah enfolded her dochder in a hug. “Don’t play the ‘what if’ game, dear. Trust in the Lord. Everything is in His hands.”

  “Paul said the Lord gave Mollie to me. What do you think?”

  “I think Paul Hertzler is one smart, caring fellow.”

  The thundering footsteps of six people hungry for breakfast interrupted their conversation. “We’ll take it one moment at a time, Dochder. Let’s not borrow sorrow.”

  * * *

  Her mamm’s words played in her head as Rosanna paced the living room floor. Periodically she’d pause to glance out the window. “Let’s not borrow sorrow,” Mamm had said. Rosanna didn’t have to borrow sorrow from anyone else. Enough of it had landed on her doorstep all on its own. If wishing could make it so, Kandi Kottyn would never show up at the Mast house today. She’d forget all about seeing Mollie and skedaddle out of Southern Maryland.

  That probably wasn’t fair or nice. The woman did have a right to see her schweschder ’s infant, didn’t she? Please, Lord Gott, don’t let her want to take Mollie away. I couldn’t bear that pain.

  The woman said she would arrive at ten-ish. Ten-ish had kumm and gone. Did Rosanna dare hope she’d changed her mind? Mollie had already gone back down for her morning nap. Rosanna had kept her up for as long as possible, but the poor little girl couldn’t hold out any longer.

  Rosanna paused in her lap around the room to peer out
the window again. Her heart jumped into her throat at the sight of a rather beat-up-looking lime green car slowly making its way up the driveway. She jerked away from the window and ran her clammy hands down the sides of her dress. “Mamm! Mamm! I think she’s here!”

  Sarah scurried into the living room, pushing a strand of brown hair beneath her kapp. She grabbed Rosanna’s hand and squeezed it. “Take a deep breath, dear one. We’ll get through this with the Lord’s help.”

  “You’ll stay in here with me?” Rosanna knew she sounded like a panic-stricken girl instead of a mature woman, but she couldn’t calm her fears or the violent trembling of her hands.

  “I will stay, if that’s what you want.”

  “Please.”

  Sarah squeezed Rosanna’s hand again as a knock sounded at the front door. “Have faith.”

  “I’m trying.”

  In the light of day, Rosanna could definitely tell this woman’s blonde hair came by artificial means. Not that there was anything wrong with that. Rosanna had seen many Englisch women studying boxes and bottles of hair dye on the shelf at the drugstore. She’d even seen some young, and not-so-young, girls with pink, purple, and blue hair. Fine lines fanning out from the corners of Kandi’s eyes hinted that she must have been born quite a bit earlier than Jane, or else she’d led an exceptionally hard life.

  Sarah nudged Rosanna into remembering her manners. “Kumm in.” She held the door wide to allow the Englisch woman to enter. She introduced Sarah, and then her mind went totally blank.

  “Let’s have a seat in the living room.” Sarah led the way.

  Rosanna waited for Kandi to pass and trailed along behind like a lost puppy. It’s a gut thing Mamm is here or we’d still be standing in the doorway gawking at each other. She perched on the edge of the sofa next to Sarah. Kandi sat in the rocking chair opposite them and looked as uncomfortable as Rosanna felt. Rosanna expected to hear the woman chomp on a piece of gum any second.

  Kandi wiggled in the chair and tugged at her tight, short skirt, which had risen halfway up her thighs when she plunked onto the chair. One red-nailed hand reached to swipe a stiff strand of platinum hair off her face. With the toes of her high-heeled black boots she set the chair in motion.