by Lexi Wilson
“Where would that be?” I asked, wrapping my hands around my mug.
“You tell me, big brother. Do you and Natalie know of any places where neither of you would ever want to go?”
My mind was blank for a long moment.
And then it hit me.
“There is.”
“Yeah?”
“Church.”
Chapter 33
AMBER
I had to admit, that was the answer I was expecting.
“Church?” I asked. “Why church?”
“It’s…complicated.”
“Complicated how?”
He took a deep, slow breath, and I could sense he was trying to figure out where to begin.
“When we were younger, when our parents were still around, we went to church all the time. Our parents were the God-fearing types, always taking us to church on Sundays. It was a part of our lives, and even though I didn’t really see it at the time, it gave us a sense of stability and routine.”
I sipped my coffee, letting him go on.
“Anyway, when we lost Mom and Dad, that all stopped. We were thrown into the foster system, and church fell by the wayside. For me, I stopped going because I just didn’t have time. Looking out for Natalie was all I cared about, and the moment I was able to get a job and start working, I did.”
“What about her?”
“It was…different. I think she associated church with our parents. Maybe thinking about going reminded her too much of them. Maybe she just lost her faith. It’s hard to say. But either way, we both stopped going. And if there’s one place where I wouldn’t expect to see her, it’s there.”
My eyes lit up. “Then that’s where we need to go.”
“We need to go to church?” he asked. “But this is LA – there’ve got to be tens of thousands of churches around here.”
I nodded. He was right – it was a tall order.
“We have to try. We can start with ones in the area. I’m not an expert on you two’s relationship, but I don’t think she’s going to try and run too far. She loves you, and deep down she’s not going to want to be apart.”
“That’s…a big assumption.”
“But I know it’s right. Family never wants to be too far from each other. And you’re the only family you both have, right?”
“Right. Both of our parents were only children, and all of our grandparents are long-passed.”
That confirmed my thinking.
“Then it’s only a matter of time before we find her. Come on – we need to get moving.”
With that, Nick grabbed his laptop and the two of us began to put together a list of all the churches within a five-mile radius. LA was huge, and densely-packed, which meant we had plenty to choose from.
“Hmm,” said Nick as he looked over the list we had so far, which was already several dozen.
“What’re you thinking?”
“I’m thinking that plenty of these churches are tiny congregations. And that means they’re going to be small buildings. Not like she can spend a lot of time in those.”
“So, your theory is that she’s found some place where she can hide out for a while?”
“Right. Some place where they’ll let her stay for as long as she needs.”
“Like…a convent.”
His eyes lit up. “Exactly! There are a few near here…” he turned to the computer and began typing. “Look – three within a few miles. We should start with those.”
“Good call. Let’s not waste any time.”
We packed up some supplies for the road, put our coffee into thermoses, and got moving.
The two of us were on a mission. But despite the importance of what we were doing, in the back of my mind I kept thinking about the other matter, the one that had gone unaddressed.
What was he thinking about me and Marcus? Was he done with me? Had the sudden appearance of my husband sent a clear message to him that I simple had too much baggage?
I pushed all of that out of my mind as best I could, focusing on the task at hand.
We stopped at the nearest convent, which was a little further up the coast. The two of us went inside and asked around, checking with nuns there and seeing if they’d seen Natalie. Nick had brought a picture, but that didn’t help – they only shook their heads when they laid eyes on it.
“What if they have some kind of…nun code?” I asked as we made our way back to the car.
“A nun code?”
“Yeah. Like a vow of silence.”
He chuckled. “I don’t think that’s how nuns work. They’re women of God, not samurai.”
I laughed. “Well, you’ll have to cut me some slack. The lifestyle I’ve been living for the last few years is about as far from ‘nun’ as you can get.”
“Fair enough.”
“Then again, one of the girls liked to dress up as one. You know – the whole sexy nun thing.”
“That’s a thing?”
“You’d be surprised.”
I flashed him a smile that was both playful and a little teasing at the same time. But I regretted it right away, realizing how inappropriate it was for the circumstances.
But I couldn’t help it. I was so attracted to him I couldn’t think straight, and the idea of losing him over what was happening with me and Marcus was enough to make me sick to my stomach.
Focus, Amber, I told myself as we climbed back in the car and started off. Nick finding his missing sister is a little more important than your emotions.
It was enough to keep me in check. But still, I had a feeling we’d find Natalie before too long. And when we did, the issue between me and Nick would return…with a vengeance.
But that had to be put aside for the time being, as much as I want resolution.
“Wait,” said Nick, a sudden look of total concentration on his face.
“What?”
“Pull out the print-out of the convents.”
I opened up the manila folder that held the information.
“There was one up the coast, right? One with a view of the water.”
I nodded, leafing through. “Right, this one here – Sisters of Mercy.” Sure enough, on the information we’d printed out there were several pictures of the vista, all of them affording gorgeous views of the ocean.
“I bet you anything that’s where she is,” he said.
“Why’s that?”
“Because, ever since we were kids, whenever Natalie would need some time alone she’d go to the water. She’d find the quietest, most secluded place she could and sit for hours, just looking out onto waves, washing them crash onto the shore. She said it never failed to clear her mind.”
“And you think that’s where she is now?”
“Whatever’s going on with her, I’m betting it’s requiring a hell of a lot of soul-searching. No doubt she’s going to need to have access to her Zen place.”
It stood to reason. “Then let’s move.”
I put in the address to Sisters of Mercy in the Map app and we were off. The drive was about thirty minutes, and the entire time I hoped for two things – one, that we’d find Natalie. And two, that Nick and I would be able to discuss what was happening between us.
We arrived at the building, a majestic cathedral-esque place on a cliffside looking out over the water. The moment he killed the engine and we stepped out of the car a sense of peace washed over me.
There was something special about the place that I noticed right away. A voice deep down told me this was the place, that we’d find her here.
“Come on,” said Nick.
Together, we went up a winding set of stairs that led to the main building. We passed several nuns as we went on, all of them regarding us with curious, almost suspicious expressions, as if they knew why were we there and weren’t sure how to handle us.
When we reached the main building, we stepped through the arched, wooden doors into the main hall. The place was still – quiet and peaceful. One of the n
uns, an older woman with bright blue eyes, caught our attention and came over to us.
“Good afternoon, children,” she said. “How can I help you?”
“I’m looking for someone,” Nick said, cutting right to the chase. “A girl, mid-twenties. Tall, slender. Looks like me, but pretty.”
A serious expression took hold of the nun’s face, and she pursed her lips.
Before she could say a word, I spotted something on the ground near one of the pews. It was a small, black hair band, the kind a woman would use to tie her hair up in a simple ponytail.
I glanced around at the nuns, seeing that they all wore the standard black-and-white outfit. None of them had their hair on display.
I stepped over to the band and picked it up.
“Nick,” I said, holding it up to him.
The nun spotted what I was holding, and for a moment it looked as if she might’ve been considering telling a fib, but that the sight of the band made her reconsider.
“You’re Natalie’s brother,” she said. “Come with me.
Nick and I shared a look, both of us eagerly following the nun.
We stepped out into a small garden, the space thick with gorgeous trees and well-kept grass. And the view looked out over the water, the endless blue shimmering.
And there were two people there, their backs to us – a man and a woman.
“I’ll leave you both alone,” said the nun.
“Thank you,” said Nick as she turned to leave.
The sound of Nick’s voice caught the woman’s attention, and she turned to face us.
Sure enough, she was a trim, pretty girl with Nick’s features.
“Natalie?” he asked.
She rose and turned to us.
Then the man turned.
“Damon?” asked Nick. “What the hell is going on here?”
Then I noticed the glittering diamond ring on her finger.
“Nick,” I said. “It looks like you kid sister went off and got married.”
Chapter 34
NICK
It was her.
And it was him.
Natalie and Damon stood before me, their hands in one another’s.
“What…what the fuck is going on here?”
“Language!”
Amber and I turned to see the nun who’d helped us. She was halfway through the door back into the entry hall, a scolding look on her face and one finger raised in the air.
“Sorry, sister,” I said.
She raised her eyebrows and nodded.
Then it was just the four of us.
Amber turned to me. “Nick…I can leave you alone.”
“Not necessary,” I said. “All I need to know is what the fu-, I mean, what the heck is going on here.”
I glanced back one more time, the nun giving me a pleased smile before heading back inside.
“Nick,” said Natalie. “I…I didn’t know what else to do.”
“Neither of us knew what to do,” said Damon.
“I don’t remember asking you a thing, Damon.” The sight of him made me furious. I felt like I’d been totally betrayed by a man I thought was my best friend. I snorted. “Guess when some guys say they’ve got your back they start right away thinking about how they can best stab you in it.”
“It’s not like that,” said Natalie. “We didn’t do this to betray you. We did it because…”
“Because what? Let me guess, because you were both in love or something.”
“That’s right,” said Natalie, clearing her throat and squaring her shoulders.
Right away I recognized the confidence of someone who was in love and didn’t care about anything else.
“We’re in love,” said Damon.
But I was still thunderstruck by this.
“Are you seriously telling me that my kid sister and my best friend have been seeing each other behind my back for…how long, exactly?”
“A few months,” said Damon. “But it’s always been there. We just didn’t know how to share it with each other.”
I glanced down at the ring on her finger, then spotted the gold band on his.
“So, rather then be straight with me about what was happening, you went off and eloped.”
“Because I knew you wouldn’t handle it well,” said Natalie. “You’ve always been so protective over me, and I couldn’t imagine doing something like this without you getting in the middle and putting your foot down.”
“Of course I would’ve put my foot down!” I said. “Natalie, do you know what kind of guy Damon is?”
“I know he’s a sweet man,” she said. “One who cares about me, who loves me, and would do anything t make me happy.”
“Wrong,” I said. “He’s a playboy. He parties and chases girls and that’s it.”
Damon shook his head, calm as could be. “Before I met her,” he said. “You were right. But when I fell in love with Natalie I didn’t give a da-, a darn about partying or other women or anything else. She’s all I want.”
“And now you’re married,” I said, shaking my head. “And I didn’t even get to walk you down the aisle.”
“This is what we wanted, Nick,” she said. “Nothing big, no stressful wedding. We wanted to get married as quickly as possible and start our new lives together.”
“Without telling me,” I said. “You ran off and made me track you down.”
“We wanted a few days to think about it,” said Natalie. “To figure out how to tell you.”
“We were going to let you know,” said Damon. “We want you to be a part of our lives.”
I glanced over at Amber. She was watching, listening. But she was also careful to no say anything, to not get involved in family business. But she was supporting me all the same.
In that moment, I appreciated the hell out of her. She knew exactly what I needed.
I turned my attention back to Natalie and Damon, both still regarding me as if not sure what might do next.
“So, instead of coming clean, you both decided to start this new relationship off by lying to me, by running away and making me worried sick.”
“But I left you a note,” said Natalie. “I didn’t want to leave you wondering if something had happened to me.”
“You thought you’d just leave me a note and everything would be fine?”
“All I needed,” she said. “All we needed was a few days of space to think about how to tell you.”
“But now it’s out the open,” said Damon. “We didn’t want you to find out like this. But it’s done. Now it’s up to you, Nick.”
“Right,” said Natalie. “You can decide what kind of role you want in our lives. If you want to support us, then we’re ready for that. But if you don’t want to be a part of it…it’ll hurt like hell, but we’ll understand.”
Out of the corner of my eye I watched as a strange expression told hold of Amber’s face. At first, I thought it was anger. But it dawned on me that it wasn’t that at all – it was pain.
Natalie cleared her throat and spoke again.
“And that’s not all,” she said. “There’s one more thing we need to tell you.”
Damon snapped his eyes over to Natalie. “Wait, you want to tell him now?”
“Tell me what?” I demanded.
“Yes,” said Natalie. “We’re getting it all out in the open. No more lies. We what we did for a reason, but Nick’s right – we have to be truthful from here on out.”
That same pained expression formed on Amber’s face. But she didn’t react, only shaking her head as if she wanted to dispense with it as quickly as possible.
Something was wrong with her.
Damon nodded. “You’re right. Do you want to tell him? Or should I?”
“I’ll do it,” said Natale, not a shred of fear in her voice. “He’s my brother, and he has a right to know.”
“What is it?” I asked.
Natalie closed her eyes and took a deep breath, then spoke.
; “Me and Damon, we didn’t just get married because we’re in love. We got married because we’re going to start a family together. Nick…I’m pregnant.”
I didn’t know what to say, what to do.
But before I even had a moment to come to terms with what I’d just heard, Amber winced in pain.
Then she dropped into a heap.
Chapter 35
AMBER
I woke up in a bedroom with stone walls, the world a daze around me.
I squinted and rubbed my eyes, trying to figure out where the hell I was, what the hell had happened.
The room was small, the bed a little stiff. A small window let in a stream of light. On a simple table next to the bed was a pitcher of water and a small glass. I poured some and drank like I hadn’t had a sip in days.
“She’s up!”
I looked over at the cracked-open door and spotted a woman in black and white – a nun. Her eyes lit up as she watched me drink and she quickly zipped into the room.
“How are you feeling?” she asked.
I drained the entire glass of water, letting out a satisfied sigh after I was done.
“A little woozy. My head kind of hurts.”
She nodded, as if totally understanding. “It’s the steps,” she said. “If there’s anything wrong with anyone, those steps never fail to suck whatever energy they have left.”
I was confused. “But there’s nothing wrong with me.”
She opened her mouth to speak, but before she could say a word another nun hurried into the room. This one carried a wooden bowl with a spoon, the scent of cooked meat following her in.
“Here,” said the first nun, taking the bowl and handing it over to me. “Eat up.” Then she spoke to the second nun. “Let her friends and family know that she’s up.” The second nun quickly left with a nod.
I investigated the bowl. It was full of a delicious-looking stew with meat and big chunks of vegetables.
“Eat,” she said, gesturing to the bowl. “You need your strength.”
“What happened?” I asked, spooning some of the stew into my mouth. “Where’s Nick?”
“You passed out in the garden,” she said. “About a half-hour ago. We brought you in here and gave you some space to rest.”