by Lexi Wilson
It didn’t take me any time at all to devour the contents of the bowl. I set it aside and laid back
Then Nick appeared in the door, concerned as hell.
“Shi- I mean shoot – there you are!” He rushed over to my side, looking me up and down as if trying to find any sign of injury. “Are you OK? How’re you feeling?”
“I’m feeling...like my back kind of hurts. And right here, too.” I touched my upper right arm, the muscle tender.”
Nick nodded for the nun to leave us alone. She departed with a smile.
“That’s because you landed there when you fell.” He sat back, shaking his head. “You gave us all a hell of a scare there, Amber.”
It was all coming back to me. I remembered the argument, learning that Natalie had gotten married and was pregnant.
“I’m fine now, I think,” I said, sitting up. “Just need…”
But I felt dizzy from the sudden movement.
“Don’t get too crazy here,” he said. “One of the nuns is a former nurse and thinks you need to take it easy.”
“Are we staying here, then?” I asked. “I can’t – I’ve got a family and a job, remember?”
He smiled. “Yeah, and I’m your boss – remember? Whatever’s going on with you, we can put work on hold we get you taken care of. And as far as you family-“ he took out his phone and handed it over. “Give them a call and tell them what’s going on. But you should know I made an appointment at a nearby doctor’s office. We’re going there in a little bit to get you checked out.”
I wanted to protest, to tell him I was fine. But while I was far from a medical expert, even I knew that randomly passing out wasn’t a sign of good health.
“My suggestion is you tell them to go over to my place. There’s plenty of room to stay, and they can wit for us to be done at the doctor. You can tell them they’re welcome for as long as they want to stay.”
It sounded like a decent idea to me.
“And I’m here for you,” he said. “No matter what. OK?”
“Thank you, Nick.”
He opened his arms and pulled me into a hug, comfort flooding through me at his touch.
After that he gave me some privacy to call Nan and Jamie. I dialed them up, letting Nan know what was going on, that Nick wanted us to stay at his place for the time being.
“That’s…not a bad idea,” she said. “Marcus won’t know we’re there.”
Marcus. I’d gotten so wrapped up in what had happened that I’d almost forgotten about him. But she was right – staying with Nick mean that, for the time being, we didn’t need to worry about any random Marcus drop-ins.
It was no small relief.
I gave her the address and she said she’d get Jamie packed and ready to go.
After that, we said our goodbyes to the nuns and headed out. I was still feeling woozy, but mostly in better shape.
Natalie and Damon were still there, and it was clear from the tension in the air that they hadn’t worked out their issues with Nick. I’d felt silly about passing out, making a scene, but in some ways, it was a blessing in disguise – it gave them all a chance to think about the matter.
“Come to my place,” said Nick to Damon and Natalie before we left. “We’re not done talking.”
Natalie and Damon regarded one another, as if silently discussing the issue.
“We’ll be there,” said Natalie.
The doctor’s office was a small clinic in one of the nearby coastal towns. The checkup was quick, the doctor asking some basic questions, followed by drawing some blood. He told me that they’d have result in a couple of days, and to take it easy until then.
After that we went to Nick’s. Damon and Natalie were there, but Nan and Jamie hadn’t yet arrived.
Nick led me into the house, Natalie and Damon sitting at the kitchen bar, their eyes snapping up to us as we entered.
Several beats of awkward silence passed. I watched as Nick’s eyes went down to Natalie’s ring, then to Damon’s. I could sense he was still wrapping his head around the idea of them being married.
Then Damon and Natalie shared a look, as if they were in on something.
“Ladies,” said Damon. “Mind if I talk with Nick for a minute?”
“That’s fine,” said Natalie, quickly speaking the words, like she was saying something she’d rehearsed.
“We’ll go outside,” said Nick. “Come on, Damon.”
Damon rose and together the two men left the main room, stepping out onto the balcony, LA stretching out before them. The two of them went right to taking, and I watched them for a time, wondering what they were saying, if their friendship was ending right before my eyes.
“Hey, Amber,” she said. “Can I talk to you for a second?”
I was confused. She had a tone like she was letting me in on a secret.
“What’s up?” I asked, coming over to her.
“Are you on birth control?”
My eyebrows just about shot off my forehead. “Am I what?”
“Sorry, that was a really personal thing to ask. It’s just that…you’re glowing.”
“What? What do you mean ‘glowing’?”
“Like, your skin is glowing. You look great, really. But…” she sighed, as if about to say something she wasn’t sure how to speak. “When I found out I was pregnant. I mean, before I found out I was pregnant, I had this glow to my skin. And I would get woozy and lightheaded and all that.”
“Don’t tell me you’re thinking what I think you are.”
She regarded me for a long moment before opening her purse and taking a small baggie out of it. Natalie handed it over and I took it, looking inside.
Within the plastic were two pregnancy tests.
“No,” I said, shaking my head. “Not a chance.”
“Just…go test yourself. You’re going to find out either way from the doctor, right? Might as well go now. Hurry, before they get back.”
It was all so surreal, like there was no way for it to be true.
But I thought about her question, about my birth control. I’d been on the pill, sure, but I’d been sloppy about it.
It was possible. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, it was possible.
Without another word I hurried up to the bathroom, opening the tests and reading the directions. I did the necessary business and waiting.
Twenty minutes passed, and I quickly looked out to see if Nick and Damon were still talking – they were.
Then I went back into the bathroom, my stomach sinking at what I saw.
Both were positive.
Panic ran through me. I grabbed the tests and the boxes and everything else and shoved it all into my purse and got out of there.
“What happened?” asked Natalie.
I didn’t answer. Instead, I rushed out of the front door. Nan had just pulled up, and I hurried to the car.
“We’re going home,” I said, getting in. “Now.”
“What?” asked Nan. “But we just got here.”
“Now.”
She regarded me for a long moment before pulling off.
“But I thought we were going to have a sleepover!” said Jamie.
I said nothing as we drove home. Instead I stared out the window, knowing my life had changed forever.
Chapter 36
NICK
Days had passed since Amber had left.
I had no idea what happened.
And things were already dicey with me and Damon and Natalie. As much as I wanted to press them for information, I knew it was a far better idea to keep things calm – no rocking the boat.
After the day of all the revelations, when Amber had passed out in the middle of the convent, I was alone again. Damon and Natalie had stayed for a few hours, the three of us trying out best to hash out the situation.
I was beyond happy that Natalie was safe, and that she hadn’t run out of my life forever. But what she and Damon had done, how they’d lied to me, I wasn’t sure
if I could ever look past it.
Damon and I had gone out for drinks only a few days prior, the two of us throwing back beers and hanging out. All the while he’d known that he was sleeping with my sister, that he was about to be my damn brother-in-law.
How the hell was I supposed to forgive and forget? And even if I did, how could I ever trust them again?
And on top of that, I still had the Carlyle merger to worry about. I gave Amber a few days off work, telling her anything she needed to do she could do from home.
But I missed her. I missed her like crazy. All I wanted was for her to show up at the office, to flash me that smile I couldn’t get enough of.
It was in the middle of the day on Wednesday, just after lunch. A soft knock sounded on my office door as I busied myself with some numbers about the merger, some bottom lines for upcoming projects.
“Who is it?” I asked, genuinely curious – I hadn’t been expecting anyone.
“It’s me.”
Amber. I sat up, coming to attention.
“Come in.”
My heart raced.
The door opened and her slender form stepped through.
Right away I noticed how she was dressed. Amber was in a pair of form-fitting jeans, sneakers, and a casual, light-blue blouse. She looked great, as always, but not appropriate for work.
And the expression on her face was grave, as if she had news to tell me I might not want to hear.
She hadn’t yet said a word, and I already didn’t like where the conversation was going.
“Good morning,” she said, raising her eyes from the floor and meeting my gaze.
“Good morning,” I said, leaning forward and folding my hands on the desk, my posture not that of friend to friend, but boss to subordinate.
Before she spoke, I noticed a piece of paper in her hand. It was folded into thirds, as I watched as she opened it up. It appeared to be a neatly written letter.
“I…OK.” She took a deep breath, composing herself before going on. “I want to thank you for what you did the other day, taking me to the hospital and all that.”
“Of course,” I said with a nod. “I would’ve liked for you to tell me what the doctor said, however.”
“I did tell you – it was stress and the heat and the trip up all those stairs.”
“And nothing more than that?”
She pursed her lips and looked away, and I could tell something was wrong.
But before I had a chance to say anything, she quickly stepped over to me and stuck out the letter.
I furrowed my brow.
“What’s this?”
“Just…just read it. It’s what I came here to give you.”
After flicking my eyes up at her one more time, I took the letter and stiffened it in front of me.
“Mr. McQuaid,” I said, reading it out loud. “The purpose of this letter is to tender my resignation, effective two weeks from today.”
There was more, but I didn’t need to go on. I tossed the letter onto the desk, my eyes locked onto her as I slowly rose.
“What the hell is this?” I asked, gesturing to the letter. “You’re quitting?”
“I…it’s something I need to do. I’ve really enjoyed the time I’ve spent here at Horvath, but it’s time for me to move onto something new.”
“I don’t understand – did you find another job?”
“N…No.”
“OK, then did you win the lottery?”
“No.”
“Then how are you just going to up and quit? Don’t you have a family to provide for?”
How could she afford to do something like this?
But as I tried to puzzle out the question in my mind, I felt…fucking terrible. The idea of her leaving me, of her stepping out that door, the two of us no longer being in one another’s lives was too much to bear. It was enough to make me sick to my damn stomach.
“It’s complicated,” she said.
“Try me.”
“It’s Marcus, my husband.”
Just the mention of that prick’s name was enough to set my blood to a boil.
Without thinking, I shot up from my seat and rushed over to her, clamping my hands onto her hips. But I didn’t hold her in a playful, sexual way – I was mad, grabbing onto her to make sure she didn’t get anywhere.
“What…what are you doing?” she asked, glancing down with panic in her eyes as she realized what was happening.
“What am I doing?” I snarled. “What are you doing? You’re coming in here, mentioning that prick’s name to me, knowing how I feel about you. Are you trying to make me act like this? Are you trying to drive me crazy?”
She was confused and scared. But she didn’t move.
“I’m telling you what’s going on!” she said. “I’m going to try to make things work with Marcus.”
“You know that’s not what you want,” I said, staring hard into her eyes. “I saw the way you were with him. He’s the last person you want to be around.”
My words sent her gaze down to the floor, as if she were ashamed. She bit down on her lower lip.
“That…that doesn’t matter,” she said. “It doesn’t matter how I feel about Marcus. What matters is that he’s the father of my child, and he’s back in our lives. And he wants to make it work.”
“You’re scared of him,” I said. “And you’re rationalizing it.”
“It…no, that’s not it.” Hesitation was thick in her voice, and I knew I’d hit onto some serous truth. “It’s…for the best.”
“No, it’s not,” I said, my hands still on her hips. “It’s what you think is for the best. But it’s not that at all. And it’s not even close to what you want.”
She flicked her eyes up at me again, and what I saw staring back at me was a side of Amber I hadn’t known before.
Amber appeared small, vulnerable. For a woman as strong as her, it was strange to see.
“I…I can’t cut him out of my life.”
“Yes, you can. He’s a criminal, and he’s a thug. He only wants you back to satisfy his own ego. And you’re smart enough to know this.”
That got a fire flickering in her eyes. “And what about you? What is it that you want?”
I couldn’t help but grin.
But words wouldn’t say what I wanted to get across.
I pulled her hard toward me, pressing her body against mine. She let out a gasp, surprised at my forcefulness.
Then I kissed her.
Amber stiffened at first, shocked. Her lips were tightly pursed, and I could feel her heart thudding through her breasts.
And then she fell into the kiss, letting it carry her away. The passion between us I’d come to know so well returned. For that moment, there was no one in the world but her and me.
It didn’t last. She grabbed onto my shoulders and pushed me back.
“I…I can’t do this,” she said.
Then she broke her eyes from mine and hurried out of the office, shutting the door behind her.
There wasn’t a moment of hesitation in my mind.
I was going to make her mine.
No matter what.
Chapter 37
AMBER
It was six o’clock.
He was late.
The day was supposed to be Marcus’s big chance to prove himself, his demonstration that he’s fit for being back in me and Jamie’s lives.
And he was late.
I stood in front of the mirror, giving myself one last look. Right away, my outfit complete, I noticed that was dressed differently than I would be for a date with Nick.
With him, I always made sure to dress just a little sexy. Nothing over-the-top, but in a way that let him know without words that I was thinking of him in that way.
But with Marcus, I’d merely thrown on a pair of OK-ish jeans and a top, not really thinking about it. But with the idea in my head, I considered whether I…wanted him.
Back in the day, I’d been crazy about the ma
n. I loved his strength, his aggression, how much he reminded me of a caveman in a leather jacket.
I was older and wiser, however, and knew what he was capable, what kind of man he was when he didn’t get his way.
But at the end of the day, he was Jamie’s father. And she deserved to have him in her life.
Still, there was Nick. Giving him that letter of resignation was one of the hardest things I’d ever done.
And it’d been Marcus’s idea, one I’d gone along with thinking it was the right thing to do.
But I was having second thoughts.
A knock sounded at my bedroom door. I recognized it right away as Nan. I told her to come in, and the door cracked open. Nan stepped in and said nothing, instead looking me up and down as if she didn’t want to hear my words, but instead wished to see into me, to know what I was really thinking.
“I’d ask how you’re feeling, but you’ve got it written all over your face.”
“Oh my God,” I said, turning away from the mirror. “Is it that obvious?”
“You’re nervous and you’re wondering if you’re doing the right thing.”
Nan was on-the-money, as always. I sighed and checked the phone again.
No text, no call.
“This was supposed to be his big chance,” I said. “Back in the hotel room he all but got down on his knees and begged for a shot to be Jamie’s dad again. And I offered it to him. But I said he needed to be on his best damn behavior.”
“And let me guess,” she said, leaning against the door. “He acted like you were crazy for thinking he’d do anything but.”
“How’d you know?”
She smiled. “Because I’ve been around the block a few times. You don’t think before I met your father I got a little experience with men like Marcus? They’ll tell you anything, know just how to sweet talk you. And they might change…for a while. But a leopard never changes their spots, you know.”
“Then this is a mistake?”
“I can’t say. Maybe Marcus is ready to do the right thing. But…”
“But he’s late. And he hasn’t said a word.”
“It’s not a good sign.”
Then a pitter-patter of feet sounded out in the hallway, followed by Jamie appearing at the entrance to my room.