Twice Driven

by Madison Faye

  I looked around the disaster of the room and frowned. “What were you, moving out or something?”

  Anna winced and looked away. “Yeah, no, uh...” she looked at me quickly. “Maybe?”

  We both choked out laughs as I hugged her to me again. “Please don’t? I don’t think I can handle losing both of you today.”

  Anna’s lips pressed against my cheek, the gesture both loving and gentle. “It can’t be that bad with him, is it?” She bit her lip. “Oh God he probably hates me.”

  “He hung up on me before I could tell him anything besides that something had happened.” I hung my head, torn a million different directions between the guilt of having betrayed Tyler, and the secondary guilt of that first guilt casting a cloud over what should be a celebration of what had happened last night. I’d betrayed Tyler by what had happened, but now I was betraying Anna by thinking about him.

  How the hell did this all get so complicated? How do you deal with loving two people?

  “I don’t know what to do,” I said softly, my face dropping into my hands.

  I heard her take a deep breath. “I do.” She reached over, pulled my head out of my hands, and looked me right in the eye. “I’m going to fix this.”

  “No, Anna, you don’t ha-”

  “No, I do have to, Chris.” She swallowed thickly. “Whatever is going on with you and I is...special - it really is. But so is what you have with Tyler.” She shook her head. “I’m not letting you let that go, no matter what it means.”

  “Anna-”

  “Grab a bag and let’s go, now.”

  I frowned. “Where?”

  “Home. I’m going to make this right, right now.”

  Chapter 30

  Tyler

  It was pouring outside as I sat in the darkness of my living room that night nursing a whiskey. The rage from earlier was gone, and now there was just this simmering sense of emptiness.

  I’d slept, after I’d crashed drunk into the chair by the pool, slept and dreamt of her, until I’d woken this evening groggy and just more tired than I’d been before. And so here I was - the total bachelor cliche - drinking alone in the dark, staring at nothing.

  And that’s when the door rang.

  “I need to tell you something.”

  It was weird seeing her like that standing at my front door. She was dripping wet from the rain, her hair slicked down around her angelic face, and all I wanted to do was grab her in my arms and kiss her.

  Except I didn’t do that. I forced that shit down in side and narrowed my eyes at her, my jaw tightening as I started to close the door instead. No way.

  “Wait! Hang on! I need to tell you what happened.”

  I shook my head, my eyes locked on hers. “I think we’re done here Christina, go home-”

  “It was me, okay!”

  Suddenly Anna was shoving her aside, her hands clenched into fists at her side as she shouldered between Christina and I. Her gaze was fierce as she pushed wet hair away from her face and stared right at me. “You wanna get mad, Tyler? Get mad at me! I’m the ‘other’ one, okay?! It was me.”

  Hang on, what?

  The world spun for a second, and I shook my head, trying to process what the fuck she was saying.

  “What?”

  “It was me,” she said quieter this time, her voice fierce but just shy of breaking as she blinked, her lips tight. “I was who she was with last night.”

  And something in my snapped. “Get the fuck off my porch, now.”

  Anna’s eyes flashed at me as she shook her head. “You’re just going to turn your back on all th-”

  “Fucking WATCH ME!” I roared, making both girls jump a step back. Christina started to cry then, and it broke my fucking heart, but I knew I couldn’t do a damn thing. And so I watched as she grabbed Anna’s hand and started to pull her away, back into the rain.

  She whirled back when they’d gotten halfway down the walkway to the driveway, blinking back water and tears as she quietly shook her head in the pouring rain. “I just thought you’d understand.”

  And this time I did step forward. This time, I leveled my eyes with her, my jaw tense as I followed them into the rain, shaking my head at her. “You thought I’d understand? Chris, are you fucking kidding me?”

  She started to open her mouth, but once again, Anna stepped in front of her, as if trying to protect her. “We were drinking, and I was weird, and-”

  “Hold on, no,” Christina shook my head, stepping in. “No, that’s not how this-”

  “Enough!” I bellowed, my jaw tight. I glared at Christina, rain slamming into us, but I didn’t even feel it. “Do you think I’m going to think that makes it all okay? Don’t go thinking I’m that guy, Chris. Don’t go thinking that I’m going to be fine with this just because ‘oh, she’s a girl so it’s not cheating’. Fuck that!” I roared. “You broke our-”

  “Our what!?” She shouted back, her words choking in her throat. “I broke our what? We don’t even know what we are!”

  I growled. “I told you, I-”

  “And I love you too!” She yelled. “But - I’m going to need more than that at some point.”

  I rolled my eyes, swearing under my breath. “Oh, something like fucking around with your friend here? ‘Trying something new’? Is that that you’re going to need?!”

  “I need YOU!” She cried out. “I need you and me to be real, not this secret little dirty affair. I want to tell people about you! I want people to know you’re the man I love, not my dad or something.”

  I sucked in a breath through gritted teeth. “I’m trying, Christina.”

  “Try harder,” Anna spat at me, and I turned and narrowed my eyes at her.

  “You should both leave. Go back to school, go...do whatever you want.” I started to turn back to the house. “I’m through with this.”

  “Wait.” It was Christina’s voice, and for a second, I paused, standing there in the rain with my back to her. “I- I need to tell you something else.”

  I barked out a laugh. “I think I’m all set with anymore fucking surprises today, Chri-”

  “I’m pregnant.”

  And the world went still. It was like the Earth stopped spinning, and for a second, time itself just stopped. And right then, everything else dropped away. All the rest of it was just bullshit when I heard those words. All the other emotions dropped away, and the anger that’d been building like a brick wall inside of me came tumbling down.

  Slowly, I turned back to see her shaking quietly, her arms hugging herself, with Anna’s standing beside her, hugging her tight. Five seconds ago, and see them like that would’ve enraged me. Seeing Anna like that with her would have felt like fucking betrayal and pain.

  Only now, it was just...beautiful. It was touching, in a way, and suddenly I found myself letting it all out - all of it.

  “You’re what?” I said quietly.

  Christina started to crumble. “I- I’m sorry. You know I wasn’t on the pill, and we didn’t use-” She started to cry as Anna puller her to her, hugging her close and rubbing her back.

  And suddenly, I was right there too, my arms around them both and my heart choking into my throat. “Let’s get the fuck inside, it’s pouring out here.”

  Christina nodded silently as I pulled them both back to the front door, dragging us in from the pouring rain and slamming the door shut behind us.

  We stood there, shivering in the semi-dark of my foyer, before I pulled her into me. “You’re seriously pregnant?”

  She started to cry again, pushing her face into my chest. “I’m so fucking sorry, I know this is going to ruin-”

  “Honey thats the best news I ever heard in my entire fucking life.”

  She went still in my arms, and suddenly looked up at me. “What?”

  And the grin I’d have never in a million years thought I’d feel again slowly started to creep across my face. “Baby, that’s...it’s-” I tightened my jaw, my eyes blazing into hers. �
�That’s everything I’ve always fucking wanted.”

  She blinked. “You’re- you’re not mad?”

  “Mad?!” I laughed, the feeling of warmth of having her in my arms again spreading through me like fire. “Fuck no! You’re carrying my baby!” And before she could say another word, I kissed her fiercely. I kissed her with everything I fucking had inside, holding her tight against me and letting her melt into me as she let out a chocked sob and then a laugh as she kissed me back.

  “I should... I should go.”

  I turned to see Anna standing quietly to the side, her face pale and her eyes looking everywhere but Christina and I.

  “No way,” Christina said quickly, grabbing her hand and pulling her towards the both of us. She took a deep breath. “I meant it, when I said it. She bit her lip, her eyes darting between Anna and I and looking so confused.

  Anna started to cry. “I did too,” She said quietly. “ But you two are so...perfect, and I don’t fit into that.”

  Christina pulled away from me and threw her arms around Anna, and again, the rage I would’ve felt before was just gone, because right there, it all made sense. Right there, I got it.

  “You better fucking fit into it,” Christina said, hugging her friend fiercely. She turned and looked at me, her eyes wide and scared looking. “Tyler, I love you, so damn much,” She took a deep breath. “But-”

  “But you love her too.”

  Slowly, she nodded, and I got it. She couldn’t choose who she felt like that about, and I - the guy who’d fallen for the eighteen year old totally off limits girl from down the street - was the last fucking guy in the world to have anything bad to say about that.

  I leaned forward and kissed Christina on the cheek, and then brought a hand to rub Anna’s shoulder. I took a deep breath. “Let’s figure this shit out.”

  Chapter 31

  Christina

  I blew on the tea in my hands, looking through the steam curling up from the mug at the roaring fire Tyler had set in fireplace. He’d pushed the coffee table out of the way while Anna and I had changed out of our wet clothes and into the soft, terrycloth robes he’d given us. And now here we were, side-by-side in a bed of blanket on the carpet in front of the couch. Tyler finished tossing another log on the fire before moving to ease down next to me, clad an undershirt and sweatpants.

  God he was attractive. What we had now - whatever it was - was much deeper than that, of course. But looking at him like that, his chiseled muscles and inked tattoos rippling in the firelight made me remember that my first attraction to him had been so primally physical. I’d wanted him - I still wanted him. I’d craved his touch - his older, firmer touch showing me what I wanted to know.

  Anna sipped her tea on one side of me, while Tyler just slowly nodded on my other side, staring off into the flames. This was perfect - this moment right here. After the drama of outside, things were calm here. Here in this room with two people I loved most in this world on either side of me, that’s all I felt.

  Love.

  I put my mug down and sighed. “Okay, so...this just needs to be said.” I turned to Tyler, biting my lip as he turned and looked down into my eyes, his gaze so fucking addictive, and so captivating.

  “I love you,” I said quietly, running my hand up and down his bare arm. “I love you more than I ever imaged I could love someone, and nothing is every going to change that.” I breathed. “We’re having a baby,” I said quietly, blushing as I saw the big grin spread across his face.

  I turned to Anna, slipping my other hand into hers and giving it a squeeze. “And I love you too. I’ve loved you for longer than I even knew what that meant. You’re my other half, and I don’t know what I’d do without you.” I shook my head and turned back to look at the fire in front of us. “That’s all I know. I just know I love you both, and if you ask me to choose, I don’t...” my words caught in my throat. “I couldn’t walk away from either of you. Not ever.”

  Anna’s hand squeezed mine. “I love you too,” she said softly.

  Tyler’s hand cupped my chin and turned my face towards him. “I love you, Christina Ames,” he said, his voice deep and his eyes flashing. “And no one’s going to ask you to make that choice.” He looked past me at Anna. “And I want to know you better, Anna.” He grinned. “I like you, a lot actually.”

  Anna blushed. “I really like you too.”

  Tyler grinned. “You’re good for her, you know.”

  “Yeah, I know.”

  We both laughed as Anna grinned at us.

  “But you are too,” she said, raising a brow. “I mean, you know, besides being an incredible lay, allegedly.”

  I groaned and turned bright red, but Tyler just laughed. “Well, I hope so,” he said, leaning down, and pulling my head towards him as kissed me deeply.

  I melted into that kiss, losing myself in him like I had that first time before he slowly pulled away. I turned my head to Anna, who’s eyes were wide with something fierce as she watched us kiss. “Your turn, dummy,” I said gently, before leaning in and kissing softly on the lips. She sighed quietly as our mouths came together, and I could feel Tyler’s hand rubbing my arm as I kissed my friend.

  And when I pulled back, I knew what I wanted. I wanted this - this moment - forever. I wanted things to be like they were right here in this moment.

  I turned back to Tyler, and I saw the hungry look in his eyes as he leaned in to take my mouth again, but I slowly shook my head. I took his arm, letting my other hand slide up Anna’s, and as I leaned back into the couch, I began to tug them together, feeling the blood roaring in my ears.

  There was hesitancy, both of them looking quickly at each other before turning back to me, but I nodded. “It’s okay,” I whispered, to both of them.

  And just like that, it happened.

  Watching the two people I loved most in the world coming together like that was possible the hottest thing I’d ever seen. And when their lips came together fiercely, mouths opening and hands moving to each other’s faces, it was like witnessing all the love in the word right here in front of me. Tyler kissed her like he did me, and I could feel the same thrill in my belly at watching him kiss her like that as I did when it was my lips on his. Anna moaned softly as her mouth opened for him, her brow furrowing as his fingers slid into her hair.

  I was on fire watching them, my body shivering beneath my robe, my nipples hardening to points against he fabric, and my pussy getting hotter and wetter by the second.

  I reached out and began to stroke Tyler’s muscled arm, thinking of how it felt wrapped so tight around me, and thinking even more about watching those arms as they held my friend. I turned to her, watching her face reflect her pleasure as they kissed. Slowly, I pushed a hand under her robe, feeling her shiver at my touch as I cupped one of her breasts. I ran my fingers lightly across her nipple, and she moaned into Tyler’s mouth.

  They started to pull away at my touch, but I shook my head. “No, don’t stop.”

  Tyler’s eyes flashed at me, but he growled and brought his hand back to her face before he bruised his lips back to hers. I gasped, seeing the ferocity in his face as he took her mouth again, the sheer eroticism of it making me squeeze my legs together as I watched them.

  I leaned forward then and pressed my lips against their’s. Anna moaned as all three of our tongues found each others, our lips sharing between all three of us as hands and mouths came together in the roar of the moment.