The presentation starts, again with the video that started the whole mess, but this time as the video plays, I don’t see any sort of sympathy from any of the girls. If anything, they are cheering on the football players silently.
When the video stops, I ask my first question. “Okay everyone, so try and put yourself in the shoes of the girls in the video. How would you feel?”
“I’d feel like shit,” a tall, plain faced but very athletic girl on the edge of the group says. “First time I’d gotten any attention from anyone remotely hot, and I’m too much of a fucking slob to get more than that.”
I blink, shocked at the anger and aggressiveness in the girl’s voice. I glance at Louden, who fidgets a little but doesn’t do anything, and I have to answer the challenge on my own. “So you think it’s the girls’ fault?”
“Damn right it is!” the girl replies, gesturing at the screen. “Listen, not all of us are born with a face like a model, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t take care of what you’ve got! And before you start with the whole ‘different body types’ bullshit angle lady, look at us. Every member of this team is over six feet tall, not a single one of us can wear heels on a date without looking like a fucking freak. Yeah, I’d like to go out to the club in some sexy Jimmy Chus and get my freak on, showing off the ass that I’ve worked damn hard to get. But I don’t, and most of us on this team don’t. Because if I go out in heels, my ass is going to be in the guy’s chest, and my knees and back hurt too fucking much eight months out of the year to go clubbing even if I wanted to. Shit, at least those assholes on the football team have a snowball’s chance in hell of making some pro money off of their sport. What do we get? An outside chance at an Olympic team, maybe a few might play some pro ball in Italy or Russia or someplace else for two or three years, but what then? I’ll tell you what, I’m going to be six foot two, coaching junior high school in Wisconsin or southern Oregon, hoping the town’s got a guy six three or more. But I can still take care of what I’ve got. So yeah, it ain’t fair the chubbos got teased. The world ain’t fair, lady. Fucking deal with it.”
Her words are delivered with such vehemence, such passion, that it stuns me for a second, and I pause before I can reply. Finally, I think of what to say. “You’re right, the world isn’t fair. And I bet more than a few of you have been harassed or teased for your height, am I right?”
Finally, progress as I see some nods around the locker room. “I bet. You know, in heels I’m nearly as tall as most of you? And yeah, I heard it all too, and more. But that’s the thing, everyone is capable of being teased. We could take the girl who’s on the cover of the SI Swimsuit Edition and figure out a way to tease her. Oh wait, that happened already, those girls have been called too skinny, too fat, fiveheaded, and more. But what I’m saying is, the anger and the pain needs to stop somewhere. It needs to stop with all of us, in this locker room right now.”
It falls flat, and by the end of the meeting I can see that, while the volleyball team isn’t going to be going out and bodyshaming anyone, they’re also not going to be working to change the culture the way I was hoping before the meeting.
There’s just too much anger, too many instances where they’ve had to be the brunt of teasing, too many times that they’ve sacrificed for their sport. They’ve bought into the common misperception that bigger people are all that way due to pure laziness, and it isn’t until afterwards, as I’m packing up my projector, that the words come to me, what I should have said.
Great comebacks, just ten minutes late.
It pisses me off. “Thanks for the help there, Louden,” I grumble as I zip my computer bag closed and look up at him. “Think you could have done more than just aspirate oxygen the whole time?”
Louden, who’s been putting away the chairs, turns to me, his jaw clenched for a moment before he speaks. “So it wasn’t the knockout presentation you made to the soccer teams. You can’t win them all.”
“I’m not talking about winning them all!” I yell, stepping around the table to get in his face. “I’m talking about the fact that you did jack shit tonight! You could have helped me out there!”
“Denise, you want some help? Fine, here’s some help. You screwed the pooch with your answer to Kendall’s challenge. That girl’s been on the short end of the stick DNA wise when it comes to men. And from what I know about her, she’s pissed off about it. She’s into guys, she’s not the type who can even play around with being a fake lesbian for company, and she’s got the body and the face that means guys aren’t into her. She intimidates guys, as you can probably guess. Instead of understanding, or turning it around on her, you gave her some kumbaya bullshit answer! I told you last time, these are hyper-competitive alpha types, almost all of them! You can’t be soft with them!”
“I wasn’t being soft!” I yell back. “Dammit, we’re supposed to be a team, and my teammate let me down tonight! You’re supposed to be the one who can work with the insight you’ve got to make the information stick!”
“I didn’t think I needed to protect you so much,” Louden grumbles, and I don’t know why, but I reach up, shoving him in the chest.
I’m a strong woman, and even though he’s an athletic stud of a man with a few inches and a few pounds on me, he still stumbles a step or two back.
“You don’t need to protect me, I’m strong enough to handle myself. But you dropped the fucking ball, Louden!” I yell back, my face flushed with anger. Louden stares at me for a moment, his eyes flashing in deep anger as his own face reddens, and then he’s grabbing me, pulling me to him and kissing me.
It’s an angry kiss, but he’s undeniable and within seconds I’m kissing him back, feeling his hot, wonderfully chiseled body under my hands as his tongue traces down my throat and up around my ear, his hands grabbing my ass and grinding against me.
We almost dance through the locker room, pulling and tugging at each other’s clothing until Louden sees what he’s looking for and lifts me into the air, for the first time in a long time making me feel almost feather-light as he lifts me onto the massage table near the wall and sets me on it, lifting my legs and pushing my skirt up at the same time he crawls on top of me, pausing only to strip off his shirt, revealing his ripped, perfectly formed, muscular upper body to me.
My eyes feast on his lean muscles as he helps me off with my blouse, his own eyes taking me in and making me feel sexy as hell.
Shrugging off my bra, Louden ignores my tits for a moment to instead kiss me as he slides to the side of the massage table, standing on the side while running his right hand up my leg, brazenly sliding in between my thighs to cup my hot, aching mound. “Louden...”
He hums happily, his fingers massaging my pussy through my panties as he kisses down my neck to my left breast, finally devouring it and teasing my nipple with his lips and tongue while his fingers rub over my clit. Sparks jump from my pussy to my chest and back again, and I arch my back, unable to do much more than run my hand through his hair as he pleasures me, his eyes gleaming happily as he reaches down with his free hand and undoes his pants, pushing them down to expose his cock.
I can’t believe it. His cock is perfect, long enough that I know he’ll reach deep inside me and thick enough to fill me completely without being obscenely porn star big, with a slight curve that has my g-spot already humming in anticipation.
I don’t know if it’s his plan or not, but the massage table is the exact height for him as he pulls back and eases my panties and skirt off, lining himself up before thrusting in, taking my breath away.
Being underneath Louden as he fills me up is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. I’ve had ‘soft’ lovers, and ‘rough’ ones. Louden’s the best of both, his power undeniable as his cock slides deep inside me, but there’s a look in his face, a gleam in his eyes that says that he doesn’t need to be overly rough, he knows that he’s taking me and that he wants me to feel good doing it, too.
“Good?” he asks confidently as he pulls back,
and I nod, pulling him in for another kiss as he thrusts in again, this time all the way and making me moan into his mouth as our tongues swirl and slip around each other, his powerful ass driving his cock all the way until I’m impaled by his stiff rod, helpless to him.
He pulls back and thrusts again, and he’s on the razor’s edge between being physical and being tender. Each thrust rips through me, but before it can crash into me and hurt, he buffers it, so that all I’m left with is this building ball of energy inside of me.
I reach down, trying to find his ass but instead gripping his lower back as he thrusts faster, rolling his hips at the end of every driving thrust of his cock to set even more parts of me on fire. My clit is throbbing with the grinding we’re doing at the end of each thrust, and I gasp, looking into his face. “Fuck Louden, you’re amazing.”
“It gets better,” Louden says, speeding up somehow, grinding his hips harder into my clit at the end of every long, amazing thrust that sends my brain into overload. I grab his arms just to grab onto something as I throw my head back, wailing as I come, my pussy overwhelmed with the sensations of his body pressed against me, every nerve inside me crying out that I’m feeling a level of ecstasy that I’ve never felt before.
Louden freezes, and I can feel him trembling, but he’s on the edge. One more stroke and he’ll come inside me, he isn’t wearing a condom, but he’s too polite to just pull out for the porno-like money shot. I wrap my legs around him, nodding. I’ve taken precautions, and Louden understands without me saying anything, bearing down as I squeeze him with my body, feeling totally complete as he shudders, his groan coming from deep within his chest, almost from his soul as he comes, his cock suddenly warmer and liquid inside me, Louden leaning in to kiss me tenderly as he comes down, stroking my face and hair gently before he pulls out, looking me in the eyes the whole time. “Talk about amazing. Thank you.”
His heartfelt thanks touches me, and I smile, stroking his face. “Not the way I expected this to happen, but thank you too. That was one of the most fulfilling, completely scintillating experiences I’ve ever had. Listen, I know this might be a weird time Louden, but about you procreating, I wasn’t trying to denigrate you in any way. I just... I was surprised, I hadn’t created the image in my head of you that way. Then today, I was projecting a lot of hostility and frustration on you that I shouldn’t have.”
I’m falling into an old habit, one that I’m terrible with, but I can’t help it. Whenever I’m trying to describe feelings or a situation that I don’t have my head fully wrapped around yet, I resort to long words, usually ones that have a lot of buzzword impact on BoPo groups. It’s just my way to try and say something until I really understand what I’m saying. Sometimes it goes right over people’s heads, but Louden’s a university educated man, he’s got a Master’s even, he should be one person who can understand me and my need for this.
Something happens though and he gets up, shrugging almost with a surly slant to his head. “Yeah well, it’s all good. Uh, I’ll get the stuff back to the office. Take your time cleaning up, just... you know, if you can make sure we don’t leave any stains behind or something.”
Louden gathers up the materials in a definitely semi-hostile silence while I get myself dressed, leaving me confused.
Did I hurt his feelings, somehow?
If I did, how? I was complimenting him the whole time. I mean, I didn’t get down on my knees like some slut and say he fucked my brains out, but I could have. Even now my mind’s whirling with the aftershocks of how hard I came, I’ve never been so totally satisfied from just one climax before.
I finish getting dressed, wiping down the massage table with a towel I find in the corner before I toss it into a hamper along with a dozen others, making sure my clothes look at least mostly decent before I stop by the basketball offices, hoping to soothe things over with Louden. I find him at his desk, reviewing some game tape on his computer, the rest of the room dark. “Louden?”
He looks up, his eyes still flinty. “Yeah?”
“I just... I don’t know what might have precipitated the last few minutes of our tryst in the locker room, and I wanted to know if there was anything I could do to facilitate the exchange of information between us.”
Fuck, I sound like a goddamn nerd.
Louden shakes his head. “No. I guess I’m just tired, that’s all. Listen, I’ve got to get these scout tapes watched before my recruiting swing over the next few days. If you don’t mind, I’ll still be here until nearly midnight. I’ll send you an e-mail or something to help us prep for the next set of meetings. The next few teams are smaller, they’ll be easy and we can knock them out in one night.”
I swallow, hurt, and back out of the office, closing the door behind me. As I leave the athletic center I’m telling myself that I’m not going to cry, that I didn’t just get ‘DL’d,’ as one of the girls of the BoPo group called it when a long time friend of hers fucked her, then pretended afterwards that there was no way they’d had sex since he could never have a thing for big girls. I tell myself that, as I get into my car and wipe away the only tear that trickles down my cheek, that he didn’t play fuck me, that I play fucked him.
Didn’t I? And if I did, then why do I feel so hurt by the way he reacted afterwards?
Chapter 9
Louden- Recruiting
Staring at my face in the mirror, I don’t particularly like the person I see looking back out at me.
“What? You’re the one who was an asshole last night,” I say to myself as I wipe the last of the shaving gel off my face and reach for my aftershave. I always use an odorless aftershave, since I’ll be going to use the gym first thing when I get to the athletic center today, and I hate smelling like a fucking bottle of Old Spice while I lift.
My reflection doesn’t reply to me calling it an asshole, but in my mind, I don’t really have a defense.
I know what caused it, it was all those goddamn words. Three and four syllable words, words that people get tossed at them during spelling bees or shit like that, words that I...
My phone rings before I can complete the thought, and I sigh, wondering if I’m running late or something. I check, and see that it’s just a text message from Billy, reminding me that after my workout we’re going to have a little sit-down to talk about this recruiting swing before I head over to the airport to grab my first connecting flight down to Miami. Florida isn’t always a hotbed of basketball, it’s just too damn hot in the summertime for blacktop ball and there’s too much open space for the best athletes to get into other sports, but it’s still a state with a lot of talent. There’s a three star recruit that is leaning our way over his in-state schools, so Billy thinks that it’d be worth the time to go down and see if we can get him to sign.
As I drive towards Mount Reston, I know what else I’m pissed off about. I could see it in Denise’s eyes last night after I first got grumpy in the locker room and then when I blew her off in my office, she thinks I was just sport fucking her.
Or maybe she thinks I fucked her just to prove something to her, I’ve seen people do both in my days here at Mount Reston.
Eleven years ago, when I was a hotshot freshman, Denise would have been right, too. I spent my first three months on campus walking around thinking more with my dick than my head. About the only time I didn’t have a hardon was when I was with the basketball team. To an eighteen year old Louden Graham, Mount Reston was next door to heaven. I’d come from a small town up north, where girls wore three layers for half the year because it was sub-freezing outside.
Everywhere I turned in Mount Reston, Virginia though, there was toned, smooth, supple female flesh in just about every shade of the human rainbow, and I went on a spree there where I was going to try and sample the entire spectrum as quickly as I could.
Lana changed all that. Although I’ll admit to myself that I did have a couple of one night flings after she and I broke up, mainly out of a physical need to do something besides jack off to
Internet porn. Neither one was fulfilling however, and neither of them could hold a candle to what I did with Denise last night.
“Face it, you stupid son of a bitch,” I grumble to myself in the rearview mirror of my car as I shut off my engine and get ready to go in and start my day, “last night meant something to you. You just chickened out, and then got butt-hurt when she started throwing the big words around. Way to come off as something other than an arrogant, insecure meatheaded jock there. Dumb shit.”
I’m still kicking myself when I get to my office and put my backpack down, grabbing my MP3 player from my desk and heading downstairs, glad that nobody minds that a basketball coach shows up for work in a team t-shirt and a pair of shorts. I slip my earbuds in, not wanting to talk to anyone today as I subject myself to the most difficult workout that basketball players can do, but also the one that is most useful to us, lifts from the floor.
When you’re built with long limbs like a basketball player, you just don’t have the angles in your legs for pulling big poundages off of the ground. But it doesn’t matter today, I’m pissed off and decide to punish myself. I’ve always been my harshest critic, to the point that Coach Billy has more than once told me to back off, but today I deserve it.
For over an hour I pound my hips, lower back and shoulders with deadlifts, power cleans, kettlebell swings, and more, until I know that I’m going to be in pain on the flight down to Florida tonight. Even Coach Loggins starts giving me the watchful eyeball, he’s been around since my playing days too and knows what I can get into when I’m pissed at myself. He doesn’t say anything though and as I stagger up the steps to the basketball office, I’m feeling better, if not totally at peace.
Inside, I see Billy waiting at the big conference table that we normally use for team tape sessions, a rarity. Billy’s old school, he likes to stay in his office unless he’s with the players, and if he doesn’t have work to do he’s out of the office, talking with professors, talking with administration, taking care of the team. Finding him in my office area at this time of day is surprising.
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