Satan’s Devils MC -Colorado Box Set: Books 4-6

by Mellett, Manda

  “Yeah.”

  I leave him sitting on the bed as I go into the bathroom, washing myself with a cloth, knowing there’s no chance in hell I could remove all the sperm left inside me. I take a second, silently questioning the mirror in front of me.

  I always saw a kid in my future, probably more than one. Not as a single mother, though, I wouldn’t want that. But would I be single? Skull’s brought me here to the club to meet his brothers as he said he’s serious about me. We’d never spoken about kids, but Demon and Violet have Theo, and downstairs young Jay talked about having a family in time. It’s not as though there’s a law against members procreating here.

  If Skull wants me as his old lady, and if in his world that’s as good as taking a wife, then a family must eventually figure into the equation. If we’ve made a mistake, maybe all we’ve done is moved it up the agenda.

  How would I feel to have Skull’s child? I place my hand on my stomach. I’d feel good.

  The face reflected in the glass frowns. Skull didn’t look happy.

  I’ll just have to convince him this could work. I’m not getting any younger, and my biological clock is ticking faster than his.

  Breathing a deep breath, I return to the bedroom to see Skull exactly where I left him, with the same angry expression on his face.

  He looks up as I enter. “Fuckin’ sorry, babe. I totally forgot.”

  His ire is directed at himself, not at me. “I should have reminded you.” I take some of the blame, to which he just nods. I’m not totally exonerated. Moving closer, I take his hand. “What will be, will be, Skull. You and me, we’re together aren’t we? If there’s a result of the carelessness today, we’ll cope.”

  “There’s the mornin’-after pill,” he offers, suggesting he’s been doing some thinking.

  “You’d want me to take that?”

  “You wouldn’t?” He seems surprised I haven’t jumped at the chance. “Ain’t a thing at all at the moment, babe. That shit would just make sure it stayed that way.”

  “You don’t want a baby with me?” I go still.

  “Not what I’m saying. All I think is that now is not a good time.” His hands swipe at his hair, pushing it back from his face.

  “When is?” I ask, pragmatically. “I love you, Skull. I’d love our baby. In nine months, in a year, two years from now. I’m not getting any younger, I’m not some flighty young girl.” Then I remember he isn’t as old as me, most times now that’s something I forget. “Are you saying it’s too soon for you to be tied down?” Suddenly I’m the one who’s angry, thinking he might have been leading me on. “Are you saying you don’t want me to be your old lady? Because, if you are, I’d rather know now. Before I get involved any deeper.”

  I start putting on my clothes.

  “What are you doing?” he asks, sharply.

  “Getting dressed and going home.” I choke back the sob that arises.

  “No! You can’t do that!” He’s off the bed, and soon we’re having a tug of war with my jeans. “Mel, I need time to get my head around this. Didn’t see myself as a dad, or not so soon, anyway. But if you don’t want to take precautions, we’ll let the cards fall where they will. I’ll deal, okay?”

  Do I want him to deal? The expression on my face must be a window to my thoughts.

  “Fuck, I’m saying everything wrong, aren’t I?” Allowing me custody of my jeans, he again rubs his hands through his hair. “It’s a shock, that’s all. Never thought I’d be careless like that. You want the pill? We’ll get it. You want to take the chance? I’ll be behind you all the way. Whatever you want, Mel.”

  “What do you want, Skull? Do you really want a relationship and all that entails?”

  “I want to claim you. Told you that, so yeah, I want it all. A relationship, which would probably include a kid or two further down the line. Just a shock that it may be sooner rather than later.”

  I feel relieved that he does see us together. “It’s highly unlikely that I’m pregnant, Skull. But if I am, I don’t want to do anything about it.” I don’t know why. I’ve no real feelings one way or another, always thought the woman should have the choice. But if fate has stepped in and decided now is my time, I don’t want to do anything to prevent it.

  I wouldn’t even have predicted my reaction had anyone asked me.

  Children are a blessing in any relationship, doesn't matter how they are conceived. Out of one? A totally different picture. But I’ve a man who’s promised he’s going to be there for me.

  Again, his head bows into his hands, but when he looks up, he’s smiling. “Okay. Let’s let things ride. You’re pregnant? That would be amazing. Yeah, this would have happened at some point. Just a bit earlier than I expected.”

  “And from now on, you’ll be careful?” I’d rather a pregnancy was planned. I suspect the chances that one mistake would bear fruit are highly unlikely.

  “You don’t need to ask.”

  Chapter Eight

  Melissa

  That first evening, while Skull was at work, I am thrown right into the thick of things with the other old ladies. The whores, I notice, keep their distance.

  I’m entranced by the kitchen which, it appears, has for many years been Jeannie’s domain. I’m informed that even while Hellfire was the prez, his old lady, Moira, rarely came to the club, so Jeannie had become the de facto head old lady. Not that there were so many of them then, just her, Moira and Sindy. Jay and Vi have only joined the club recently.

  Jeannie’s had the kitchen fitted out so she can cook easily for all the members, and there’s an industrial-sized oven the size of which I hadn’t seen before. My eyes gleam as I look at it.

  “Anytime you want, hon, feel free to use it. I suck at desserts and cakes, and many here have a sweet tooth. You want to cook that shit? You’re welcome to do it.” Seeing my interest, she opens cupboards and drawers, showing me that the place is well stocked with every item of equipment I could wish for.

  At home I’ve got most of the items I need but have to cook for events like Beth’s party in batches. Here, I could get more done at once.

  “I sound boring, don’t I? Saying my hobby’s cooking?”

  “Not boring at all, doll face,” a rough voice sounds, “I ate one of your cookies earlier.”

  “What Pyro means,” Jeannie glares at him, “is that he ate one tub. One fucking tub. All to himself.”

  Pyro, a tall, muscular and heavily tattooed biker is uncontrite and just shrugs. “You handed it to me.”

  “For you to take one.”

  He winks at me. “Not what you said…”

  “Get out of here, Pyro. Haven’t you got some fires to put out?”

  “Got to start them first.” His shoulders shake as he laughs. But he moves off quickly when Jeannie bats him with a cloth.

  She smiles fondly at his retreating back, then turns to me. “They’re a good bunch. A bit rough around the edges, but fairly easy to keep in their place. Which is outside of this kitchen unless they’re being fed.”

  “A women’s domain?” It sounds a bit sexist.

  “We need somewhere to ourselves.” Vi’s gentle voice sounds from behind me. She’s carrying Theo in her arms. Suddenly I remember how indiscreet Skull and I had been, and that might be me in another year.

  “Can I hold him?”

  “Help yourself. He’s getting really heavy. If Skull had brought you around earlier, maybe you could have baked his birthday cake. He turned one last week.”

  Taking Theo, I realise why Violet was so keen to hand him over. He’s a solid baby, much heavier than he looks. Spying a chair, I go sit down and hold him on my lap. He’s a lovely boy, all smiles and chuckles as I bounce him on my leg. Within moments though, he wants to get down.

  Vi nods, I place him on the floor where he holds onto the chair leg, then takes a couple of steps, weaving like a drunk. It’s not long before he collapses.

  “He took his first step last week. I’m going to need eye
s in the back of my head soon,” his mother says proudly.

  Jeannie puts her arm around her. “He won’t be allowed to get into trouble. You know everyone will be watching out for him.”

  “Especially Jay.” She turns to me. “Jay’s training to be a nanny, she’s always loved kids. And she’s really taken to Theo.”

  “That’s because the Tucson club is overrun with children. She misses them,” Jeannie explains. “She misses her niece, Faith. Such a shame she can’t be with her sister.”

  I wonder why she can’t, but don’t want to pry.

  There could be worse places to have a baby than in this club, I realise. I suspect the same support Vi’s getting will be offered to me. I file what they’ve told me about Jayden away. If I’m pregnant, I’ll need some childcare while I’m working.

  When Skull returns from whatever he’s been doing, he takes me up to his room, and this time, remembers the condom.

  “Mel,” he starts, when afterwards I’m lying cuddled in his arms, “how did you get on while I was gone?”

  “It was good,” I reply, truthfully. “I met some of your brothers who all treated me with respect.”

  “As they should,” he butts in. “May not have voted on you, but they know that you’re mine. How did you get on with the old ladies?”

  I roll my eyes. “I was getting to that. Very well. Seem to have some common ground with Jeannie as I admired her kitchen, and Vi’s easy to get along with. Didn’t see much of Jay.”

  “Nah, you wouldn’t. I passed her and Pal’s room earlier, seemed they had an early night.” He winks, suggestively, making me laugh.

  “Sindy came in. She’s quiet but friendly enough.”

  “What did you discuss?”

  “Cooking and babies.” Women shit in other words. But I’d enjoyed it well enough. I’d shared a few recipes.

  He frowns for a moment. “Can you make sure you get on with Violet, Mel? Do me a favour and become her friend, will you?”

  I glance at him strangely. “I’m hoping to get on with everyone. Why are you singling her out?”

  “Oh come on, Mel. She’s the prez’s old lady. You get close to her, and you’ll be a shoe-in with the club. She’s the one you should keep on the right side of. Can’t tell you much, but before she came here, she had it rough. Reckon she could use a sympathetic ear from time to time.”

  Oh. He’s starting to make sense.

  “She’s our queen, Mel. Upset her, and it wouldn’t be good.”

  I start to tell him I don’t intend to upset anyone, that I go out of my way to avoid things like that. At work, I’m usually the peacemaker. But I don’t get a chance, as Skull hasn’t finished.

  “Making yourself indispensable, giving her a shoulder to lean on, well, that would probably count for a lot.”

  Over the next couple of weeks, I try to do just that.

  Remembering this is my opportunity to see if I could live his life, I spend most weekends at the clubhouse, but return to my own home during the week. With working, I like to follow the routine I’ve fallen into. Skull pops around between Monday and Friday and always ends up staying the night, but we don’t officially move in together, even though he alludes to us doing so in the near future.

  Skull and I don’t refer to our accident again. As time goes on, I feel no different, and after a couple of weeks, nature runs its normal course, letting me know I’m not pregnant. I feel slightly disappointed. Skull, when I tell him, just nods. Whatever he feels he keeps hidden.

  What seemed to have gotten to Skull most, however, hadn’t been the fact we might have started a family, but that his reaction had given me cause to question his commitment. Since that day he’s been going out of his way to make sure I feel loved and wanted.

  Sometimes I’m embarrassed by his show of affection in front of the other members and women, but secretly I’m pleased that he’s not trying to hide our relationship. It amuses me that this strong biker isn’t ashamed to declare his love for me publicly, if not with words, then by the kisses and caresses.

  I suppose it was a little test for him when I asked if he’d like to meet my parents. Like any man, it didn’t seem a suggestion he found thrilling, but he had the right answer. “Anything for you, babe,” he’d replied.

  So we drove one Friday to Denver and spent the night there, my mom putting us in separate bedrooms which Skull accepted without complaint. He acted politely enough, refrained from overt PDAs, and chatted to my father. Before we’d left, Mom pulled me to one side.

  “Not thrilled about what he does, Melissa, but he’s pleasant enough. Seems to hold you in high regard and is respectful. We won’t stand in your way if you’ve found what you’re looking for.”

  “I think I have Mom.”

  “Then you have our blessing.”

  After hugs and goodbyes, Skull and I make our return trip to Pueblo and resume our routine.

  Friday nights I drive to the club with a weekend bag beside me, nowadays arriving feeling pleasure at being here instead of afraid, occasionally remembering the first time I was let in the gate and had parked my car at the rear of the compound. Now I’m more likely to greet the prospect with a friendly wave and join in the ribbing when someone gets out shot when they go target shooting. It doesn’t bother me at all when they come in putting rifles I’ve not once seen used in anger away.

  Club members and women have all been so welcoming, genuinely pleased to see me each time I’ve arrived. More often than not they show they’ve adopted Skull’s shortening of my name, and I feel it’s like they’re accepting me. The only females I don’t have much time for are the sweet butts, but they stay out of my way, and I out of theirs.

  This evening, like so many others, I spend time helping in the kitchen alongside the other women. We’re all good at multi-tasking when it comes to cooking a meal and talking. My contribution tonight are apple pies, and knowing how much the men like them, I make extra.

  Skull snatches me away after we’ve eaten, and we make love, tonight so tenderly. It’s after, when we’re snuggled up together that he asks a question.

  “Saw you talking with Vi, earlier. What did you discuss?”

  “Theo’s new tooth,” I say fast, smiling as I remember the way he’d toddled over to me and proudly showed me his mouth, his chubby finger pointing to the new addition.

  Skull stiffens. “Nothing else?”

  “What do you mean?” I’m confused. I recall he’d asked me to get close to the president’s wife, but what better way could there be than to show an interest in her son? It’s not contrived, either, I’m growing to love that sassy little boy. I’d even offered to babysit for her if she ever needed someone. Not that she has a shortage of volunteers, but she’d accepted with genuine pleasure. I feel I’m doing exactly what he wanted.

  “You’re missing your chance, Mel. Look, I want us to be together. Permanently. Which means you need to understand the club from a woman’s point of view. It’s not all rainbows and unicorns. You have a laugh with the women? Cook in the kitchen? Play with the kid? That’s fine as far as it goes. But there’s a darker side to an MC, and you’ve got to know you can live with it. If you can’t accept everything, the good, the bad and the downright ugly, well, you’re not going to make a good old lady.”

  I hadn’t thought about that. I know the Satan’s Devils have a reputation, but from what I’ve seen, they’re about nothing more than their legitimate businesses. Sure, they play hard too, sometimes, in my view, too much out in the open in the clubroom with the sweet butts, but that’s just their way of life. I, as a newcomer, have no say in it.

  Now Skull’s suggesting that there is a side to the club I haven’t yet seen and that might not settle so well with me. Inside, I feel a trickle of fear. What is it he’s alluding to, and should I try to find out? Before I get in any deeper. Who am I kidding?

  “Skull. I don’t know if I want to know. What if there’s something I don’t think I can accept?” I sit up, looking down
at him. “What if I discover something I can’t live with? Would I lose you?”

  He pushes himself up, and his hands hold my upper arms, stopping just short of giving me a shake. “Told you before, Mel. It’s you I want. You can’t take the club, then I’ll leave it. I can get another job working security or some shit like that. It’s you and me. For life.” He stares at me, intently. “Sure, I worked hard to get my patch, and I’d love to hold on to it, but now I’ve found you, I don’t want to lose you. I’ll leave if I have to. Do me a favour, Mel. Ask Vi what really goes on. Then we can make our decisions. Do it, for me, babe? Look, I’ve claimed you, okay?”

  How can I refuse? The way he’s putting it, I can’t. Every word out of his mouth makes sense. If Vi, the wife of the president, can’t give me the lowdown on what goes on behind the scenes, and what really will be asked of me as an old lady, who else could?

  The next afternoon I offer to bake. As normal, bikers start hovering before the muffins are even made. A tray of chocolate chip cookies disappears as soon as it comes out of the oven. When Jeannie finally has enough and chases them out, I get my chance.

  “So, what’s it really like to be an old lady?”

  The kitchen door opens. In walks a biker I haven’t met, and he’s got a woman with him who he introduces as Stevie. It’s immediately apparent she’s blind and is accompanied by her service dog. She seems to have been here before and knows everyone, as she addresses Violet by name. She hasn’t met me though, so I introduce myself.

  “I’m Melissa. I’m with Skull.”

  Beef, as it appears his name is, asks whether Skull’s at last claimed me, and Jeannie replies, putting her arm around me, yes. Which seems strange, but I don’t question it. If he has, that wasn’t what he told me, or not that it was official. Maybe he’ll tell me tonight. He might be waiting until I report back I can take whatever happens in the club.

  “Melissa likes cooking,” Violet explains. “Especially baking. Get ready to put on some weight when you taste her muffins.”