A Temporary Christmas Arrangement
Page 21
“A date?”
Brynn glanced up at Nick, who was now looking at her like she’d sprouted a second head. Although he normally kept his sandy blond hair cut short, it was in need of a trim and a thick lock fell over his forehead. He had broad shoulders and a muscled build that filled out his dark police uniform in a way that would have most women begging him to handcuff them.
Not Brynn.
She wouldn’t ask Nick Dunlap for a single thing if she had any choice in the matter. “You keep repeating what I say,” she pointed out.
“I’m trying to process this and also get my heart to slow down. Seriously, you scared the hell out of me.”
“I’m not yours to worry about,” she reminded him.
A muscle ticked in his jaw. “Duly noted, but friends show concern for each other.”
Friends, she thought to herself, trying not to let him see what that word did to her. Brynn and Nick could tell everyone they were friends. But it wasn’t like it had been before. She missed those easy days.
He released her arm. “I thought you’d decided against dating.”
She crossed her arms over her chest as a brisk gust of air blew up from the valley, whispering through the pine trees that surrounded them. “Can you give me a ride into town, Chief? I’m already late.”
“What about your car?”
“It’s the alternator. Jimmy warned me it needed to be replaced the last time I had the car into his shop for an oil change, but I never got around to it. Now I will.”
“You can’t ignore stuff like that.”
“Nick, come on. Save the lecture and just give me a ride. I’ll call Jimmy after lunch and have him send a tow truck for the car.”
“I could take a look at it,” he offered.
“Not your problem.”
He looked like he wanted to argue but gave a small nod instead. “Grab whatever you need and make sure it’s locked.”
“Thanks.” She turned for the Toyota, then spun back around. “Hey, Nick?”
One side of his mouth curved. “Yeah?”
“What were you doing up here today?”
He shrugged. “It’s the five-month anniversary of Daniel’s death. Same as you, in a way, minus the dating part. I was visiting my buddy.”
“Oh.” Emotion tumbled through her like debris coming down the side of a hill after a rockslide. The reminder that Nick was her late husband’s friend as much as hers shouldn’t hurt her at this point.
But it did.
* * *
“Tell me more about dating,” Nick said, relieved his voice didn’t waver as he made the request. He would never admit how much the thought of Brynn in another man’s arms affected him. Hell, he’d been one of the groomsmen in her quickie wedding to Daniel Hale a decade ago and had managed to stay friendly with both of them over the ensuing years.
He’d blown his chance with Brynn back in high school, when he’d been a selfish, egotistical, immature kid. Maybe he’d grown up a little since that time, but he knew he still didn’t deserve a woman like her.
Not that Daniel had, either. When he’d told her he’d driven up to Devil’s Landing, the picturesque overlook in the hills to the east of town, because of the anniversary of Daniel’s death, it hadn’t been a lie. But he wasn’t there to honor a friend. Nick had so much pent-up anger over the way Daniel had treated Brynn during their marriage, carelessly like she was some sort of old pair of shoes instead of his precious wife.
Whatever friendship he’d had with Daniel had been cut short by the other man’s callous actions, the serial cheating and constant disrespect. After the accident, Nick’s anger mixed with guilt, an almost untenable brew. What if he had pushed Daniel to give up the women? What if he’d convinced him to try to make his marriage work?
What if Nick had asked Brynn not to marry Daniel in the first place?
He hadn’t done any of those things. He’d minded his own business and kept both Daniel and Brynn at a friendly arm’s length. Driving through the winding roads of the Cascades’ towering pine forests with Brynn next to him somehow calmed Nick. He needed all the calm he could muster to handle what was coming next.
“It’s fairly straightforward,” Brynn replied, and he noticed the edge in her tone. She tucked a lock of dark hair behind one delicate ear. Everything about Brynn was delicate. Her small frame, pale skin and clear blue eyes framed by thick dark lashes. She looked more like a fairy-tale princess who should be conversing with tiny forest creatures than the overworked single mom she was. “I’m meeting a guy for lunch. Maybe we’ll hit it off. If not—”
“The last I heard, you wanted nothing to do with dating. You were devoted to Tyler.”
He heard her soft gasp and realized he’d said the wrong thing. Nothing new where Brynn was concerned, he supposed.
“I mean—”
“I understand what you mean.” One finger picked at the edge of the hole in the fabric above her knee. “Mara and Kaitlin are convinced it will be good for me.” She turned to him. “Going out to lunch with a stranger has nothing to do with my devotion to my son.”
“I know. I’m sorry. Really sorry.” His fingers tightened around the steering wheel. “I’m still not thinking clearly. You’re a great mom. The best. No one compares. If there was an award for—”
“Nick, stop.”
He blew out a relieved breath when she laughed. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Brynn. She’d been through enough already.
“I did say at Mara and Parker’s wedding that I wasn’t interested in dating, and I’m still not sure I’m doing the right thing. Maybe this is too soon, but it’s no secret my marriage wasn’t exactly a happy one.”
They’d gotten to town and he turned to her at the traffic light at Starlight’s main intersection. “You deserve to be happy.”
Her lips curved into a genuine smile, and it made his heart sing at the same time his chest squeezed painfully. He didn’t want to consider Brynn happy with another man.
“Can you drop me at The Diner?” she asked after a long moment.
The Diner was a popular place in Starlight, one that was sure to have lots of locals happy to gossip about the widow out with a new man.
“Sure.” He drummed his fingers on the console between the two seats, trying to appear like he didn’t want to follow the man she was meeting out of the restaurant and find some flimsy excuse to pull him over and harass him for the heck of it. Nick wouldn’t do that. His personal life might not be much to speak of, but he prided himself on being a good cop and leader for his town.
It had taken a tragedy for him to wise up and make something of himself, but he’d done it. And he had more sense than to mess it up now.
“Mara and Kaitlin are calling their little project the twelve dates of Christmas. They have a whole list of potential men to match me with until I find the right one.”
He swallowed back the bile that rose to his throat. “You’re going on dates with twelve different guys?”
“Hopefully not. I can barely find time to brush my teeth some days. Wait a minute. Are you slut shaming me, Nick Dunlap?” She unclicked her seat belt as he pulled to the curb in front of the restaurant. “I know you.” She wagged a finger in his direction. “Not just Chief Dunlap. I knew Tricky Nicky and your revolving door of girlfriends from high school. You might remember it was my house you sneaked over to the night that half the cheerleading squad showed up on your front lawn so you could vote on which one was the hottest.”
He pressed two fingers against the side of his temples. “God, I was an ass.”
“You still are from the sound of it.”
He almost laughed at the truth in her statement. That was the problem with Brynn, or with his reaction to Brynn. He wanted to be her friend and support her but always managed to say the wrong thing. She was right. She did know him—or at
least had known him—better than anyone. He hadn’t been alone with her, even for something as straightforward as a car ride, since high school.
It had been easy enough to put her in the category of “might have been” when she was married to Daniel. Nick had locked up any feelings he had for her that went beyond friendship. Up until recently, he’d believed the key to that lock had been thrown away along with so many other childhood dreams.
But now...
He shook his head. No. Daniel’s death didn’t change anything. Nick knew he wasn’t cut out for love. After hurting Brynn once, he wouldn’t take the chance of doing it again.
“I want you to be happy,” he said again. “I hope this date, and any of your other twelve-men-a-milking or pear-tree-partridge outings go well. Seriously, I do.”
“No partridges or milking men,” she said with another small laugh. “It’s lunch. Not a big deal.”
Tell that to his heart.
“If you need anything, or if Tyler needs anything...” He cleared his throat. “Just know I’m still your friend.”
Her gaze gentled. Brynn was far stronger than she looked, stronger than most people gave her credit for, including him for too long.
She’d gotten married at eighteen to a boy she barely knew after their first sexual encounter left her pregnant. Ten years later, her husband died in a car crash, but he hadn’t been alone in the truck when it careened off that cliff. His mistress had been in the passenger seat, and in a small town like Starlight, that fact was big news.
But he’d never seen Brynn cower from the gossip or do anything but hold her head high and keep moving forward. He guessed her motivation came from Tyler and her desire to be a role model for her son. Either way, he admired her quiet strength.
“That goes both ways,” she said quietly. “I know the holidays can be rough for you.”
He scoffed even as his gut tightened. “I’m fine. Busy at the station, which is how I like it. December is like any other month to me.”
She studied him for a long moment, and his inclination was to fidget like a naughty schoolboy caught with his hand in the cookie jar. But he managed to keep his expression neutral.
“Will you be at the tree lighting tonight?”
“On duty,” he confirmed. Every year, the residents of Starlight kicked off the holiday season in front of town hall with the annual lighting of the town’s Christmas tree. The women’s auxiliary would serve hot cocoa and the local choir led everyone in singing carols to celebrate the countdown to Christmas.
Nick always volunteered to work the event because so many of his deputies had families to attend with. He had...well, his mom. What self-respecting late-twenties bachelor would admit that fact?
“I’ll see you there,” she said with a final smile.
“You can tell me how your date went,” he responded.
Her eyebrows shot up in response, but she nodded. “Sure, Nick. What a funny role reversal for us. Me sharing my dating adventures instead of the other way around.”
“Good luck.”
He didn’t move for almost a full minute after she disappeared into the cheery restaurant. Funny was the last word he’d use to describe the thought of listening to Brynn’s stories of dating other men.
Friendship. That was all Nick had to offer, he reminded himself. He’d been a lousy friend when they were younger and distant since her marriage. He had a chance to make up for that now. It was December, the month of increased caring and generosity, and he was going to make sure Brynn’s Christmas was a merry one.
Copyright © 2020 by Michelle Major
millsandboon.com.au/survey2020
IMPRINT: Heart
ISBN: 9781867222057
TITLE: A TEMPORARY CHRISTMAS ARRANGEMENT
First Australian Publication 2020
Copyright © 2020 Christine Rimmer
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