Love Worth Pursuing

by Max Hudson

  Euan hummed a little, mulling it over. “I suppose I would rather have a life a bit more like yours, traveling around, seeing new and different things, not having to deal with the inconveniences of being stuck somewhere.”

  “I guess you feel kind of trapped right now, huh?”

  Euan nodded, his grip tightening on Steve’s hand almost imperceptibly. “A little bit. But I have to stay a bit longer.”

  “From what you’ve said, work at the bakery really doesn’t need to be as involved as you are. Maybe someone else could take over it?” Steve suggested.

  “No, I… I feel like I kind of have to do something.” Euan sighed. “My mother is ill. She always has been. It’s a chronic thing, mast cell stuff. She basically develops sudden allergies, inflammation, reacts to new and different things. It’s like being allergic to new things all the time and you don’t know. But it has been getting worse as she gets older. And there isn’t much any of us can do. My dad… he works so hard to keep the house in order, keep her happy and comfortable. And he had to cut back hours at the bakery until it looked like they were going to close. I suppose this feels like the only useful thing I can do for them.”

  Steve was a little taken aback. He hadn’t considered this much, it had only been mentioned in passing after all, but now Steve was in awe of how composed and confident Euan seemed. It was clear their family was going through a lot, and Euan was carrying an emotional burden he couldn’t unload. But Steve had no idea how to respond. He just squeezed Euan’s hand gently.

  “Sorry,” Euan said, sounding a little choked up, coming to a stop near the castle wall. Steve glanced down and saw a little redness in Euan’s eyes. “I shouldn’t be bothering you with this, it’s not-”

  “It’s fine,” Steve interrupted. “Sounds like you needed to get that out.”

  “Yeah,” Euan admitted. “I try not to. I’m used to being open about it, I mean, I’ve always been ‘that kid with the sick mother’, right? But these days it feels different somehow, I don’t want to bother people with my problems. Even I can’t do anything about them, it feels like attention seeking.”

  “Well, maybe you need some attention,” Steve suggested. “Maybe you need someone to listen to you for a bit. And I can be that someone, if you like.”

  “I would like that a lot,” Euan replied, wiping one eye with the back of his free hand. “But tell me if I am annoying you, alright?”

  “It takes a lot to annoy me,” Steve said.

  Their eyes met, Euan smiled nervously, as though ashamed he had nearly cried. “I like you,” Euan said, his thumb gently stroking the back of Steve’s hand.

  Euan leaned up a little, and, without thinking, Steve leaned in, kissing Euan softly. It was the lightest butterfly kiss, barely a fraction of a second, but it felt right. Steve sighed as their lips parted.

  Euan smirked a bit. “You know, usually I’m the big strong guy.”

  “You’re probably still bigger and stronger than me,” Steve corrected. “A few inches of height won’t make me any less skinny.”

  “I don’t know, a couple of inches can make a huge difference,” Euan said.

  Steve laughed. “Uh, true, yes. Can we go inside the castle?”

  “Yeah, of course,” Euan replied. “It’s kind of cool the first few times you go in. Proper 13th Century Norman ruins.”

  They walked up the slope, Steve trying to focus on the place, maybe taking a few pictures, but finding it hard as he walked with Euan. He wanted to talk more, get to know Euan even more, let Euan get to know him. Work was the furthest thing from his mind.

  The castle ruins were cold, but pretty. Steve tried to imagine how they would look under bright sunshine. It seemed so much bigger inside than it had from the corner. Steve could almost imagine how people might have lived there, and he wondered what led to the castle degrading, whether it was abandoned and lost to time, destroyed in war, or changed hands too many times to maintain.

  After a walk around, eventually managing to take some pictures, Steve took a few notes on his phone.

  “Giving up on the pen and paper?” Euan asked.

  Steve laughed. “After the other day? Absolutely.”

  “You don’t look comfortable, how about we go get brunch, or maybe it’s lunch time already? Anyway, we can go get something to eat and you can sit down and work.”

  “That sounds like a plan,” Steve replied, pocketing his phone. Truth be told, it was hard to think of what to say about the place. He just wanted to think and write about Euan.

  Walking down the road towards the town center again, Steve noticed the brightly colored buildings being inter spaced with more traditional stone and brick front terraced houses, shops appearing here and there until finally they reached a street full of both local businesses and big franchise stores. There was something a bit disheartening to see so many familiar brands and signs all of a sudden. It ruined Steve’s immersion, stole away from the authenticity he wanted to find. Deep down he knew that nowhere was truly authentic in that sense. Probably hadn’t been for decades. And yet, after getting this job he had hoped to see something a lot less familiar.

  Euan stopped in front of a small cafe that had chairs out front and a sign advertising all day breakfasts. Its muted colors and the artsy font of its sign were at odds with a lot of the blocky, clean, brightly colored signs of the bigger stores, and Steve felt a little better wandering in.

  “I like this place,” Euan said as he walked to the counter. “Great breakfasts.”

  “I haven’t had an English breakfast yet,” Steve mused. “I think that’s something you have to do when you visit the UK, right?”

  “Well, this is Wales, so maybe you can have the Welsh breakfast,” Euan suggested.

  “What’s the difference?”

  “We serve ours with laverbread,” Euan replied.

  “Lava? So, like, spicy?” Steve asked. “I like hot foods.”

  “No, laver. E-R on the end. It’s seaweed. And not in a bread. I don’t know why it has the name. It’s like a seaweed spread.” Euan fished through his pockets, pulling out his wallet.

  “I am… not convinced,” Steve replied.

  “Want to order some on the side? Then if you hate it, it hasn’t touched your other food.”

  Steve nodded. “Sure thing. And put your wallet away, I’m paying.”

  “Oh, yeah, right,” Euan said with a laugh. “Force of habit.”

  There weren’t as many seats in this little cafe as there had been at the bakery, but the place was significantly smaller, and the sidewalk space was barely big enough for two tables. Steve and Euan ordered two Welsh breakfasts, Steve’s with his laverbread on a separate plate, and then they sat by the window, watching people walk by.

  “So, what is your favorite aspect of Art History?” Steve asked.

  “Huh?” Euan mumbled, looking back towards the table.

  “Your course, what is your favorite bit?”

  “Well, I really enjoyed the theory part, to be honest. It’s like… a module that shows you how to understand art history. How to put all the information together to make sense of an event, or a piece of art. It’s a bit of a challenge, but I love that. I love taking my perspective and changing it around with new information, working on every detail,” Euan explained, his eyes lighting up. “And what about you, you say you love to show people new places, right? What excites you the most about a new place?”

  “Exploring,” Steve replied without hesitating. “There is something amazing about going to a place and finding something on my own. It’s satisfying.”

  Their breakfasts arrived as Euan seemed about to reply. Steve immediately eyed the plate of laverbread, served with a side of buttered toast. “That looks weird,” Steve said.

  “Try it, it’s awesome,” Euan insisted, spooning a forkful of laver onto his toast and taking a bite.

  Steve nodded and copied Euan. It was, surprisingly, pretty good. A little like the ocean, almost like the plant vers
ion of shellfish, it went really well with the toast and butter.

  The slice of round, pitch black meat, was another matter entirely. Steve swallowed the mouthful awkwardly and washed it down with juice. “What was that?” he asked. “I thought it was mushrooms or something. But… ew.”

  Euan laughed. “That’s black pudding.”

  “Pudding?”

  “Uh, like a blood sausage,” Euan said.

  “Please tell me it isn’t really made of blood?” Steve asked.

  Euan laughed some more. “Of course it is. Don’t tell me you like laver, but not black pudding?”

  “I do not like black pudding,” Steve replied.

  “Oh, I’ll have it then,” Euan said, in the same beat reaching over with his fork, piercing the nearly complete circle of sausage and putting it on his own plate. “Your loss, really.”

  “I think now I understand why folk say Brits eat weird food. Although I’d expected it to be more bland, not so much organ meat for breakfast,” Steve said. “Anything else on here I need to worry about?”

  “Uh, guess not? Eggs, bacon, fried tomato, sausages, baked beans, which are really just stewed in tomato sauce, and more toast,” Euan said, indicating each item with his fork.

  “I still thought they had mushrooms,” Steve replied.

  Euan shrugged. “Sometimes. Still think you could live here?”

  “Is the blood sausage mandatory?” Steve asked with a grin.

  Euan laughed and shook his head. “If it were, I’d eat your servings every day. I’m just that generous.”

  “Truly magnanimous,” Steve said.

  “Wanna go for more of a walk after this, or get back home and write it all up?” Euan asked.

  Steve paused a moment, stirring his beans with his fork. “I guess I should try and put this to paper.”

  Euan nodded. “Would be good for me to get back to the bakery too. I can probably open a few hours, so my father isn’t too upset I was gone this morning.”

  “Just tell him you were delivering stuff? I mean, you technically delivered me here, right?”

  Euan laughed, the gap in his teeth a little more prominent in the light from the window. Steve thought it was adorable. “Well, yeah,” Euan replied. “But I don’t feel right lying to him, you know?”

  Steve nodded. “It was a joke, really. But do you really need to tell him?”

  “I guess not,” Euan mused. “He has so much to worry about, may as well not give him any more...”

  Truth be told, Steve didn’t mind where he was so long as he could spend time with Euan.

  Chapter Five

  “Weren’t you going to open the cafe?” Steve asked as he watched Euan wandering about the back of the bakery.

  “I don’t know, it just feels a bit senseless. I’ve been out most of the morning. Nobody will miss us for a day. And if I do open, then the window-shoppers will all come in to look at the shelves and ask questions, but never buy anything. I just feel like this is a better use of my time,” Euan replied, carrying an empty crate to the back.

  “Can I help?” Steve asked.

  “Aren’t you supposed to be working?”

  “I can’t focus right now,” Steve replied. “And it feels awkward to just watch you work and not do anything.”

  Euan paused in the doorway. “I don’t know, maybe get that other crate and bring it through?”

  Steve looked down. It was just an empty wooden box. He went to pick it up, a little surprised at how heavy it actually was. Euan was handling them like they were cardboard moving boxes. Moving into the back of the bakery, Steve looked around, more than a little curious about what was back there. It seemed mostly uninteresting. Shelves and a few boxes, a dishwasher, a long shining metal counter. Through another open door at the far side of the room, he could see the ovens.

  “So, what have you got left to do?” Steve asked.

  Euan shrugged. “Not much. Set the dishwasher, make sure the dough resting back there is progressing properly.” Euan reached to take the crate Steve was holding.

  “No, just tell me where to put-” Steve fumbled a little, and instead Euan’s hand seized Steve’s hand, not the crate.

  Euan paused, then smiled. “Say, do you want to show me what your room is like? I haven’t seen inside the B&B, but everyone says it is really nice.”

  “Uh, sure, yes,” Steve replied.

  Euan took the crate from Steve’s hands and put it on the stack. “Let’s go, then.”

  ***

  Walking up the stairs to his room, Steve felt like a kid sneaking his boyfriend home after school. He was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to have other people in the room, considering it was reserved for one person. He also didn’t doubt that they might turn a blind eye to people coming and going during the day, but this was a level of awkwardness he would rather avoid.

  Euan seemed far more comfortable doing this, but was still rather quiet on the way up.

  As soon as they were in the room, Steve breathed a sigh of relief.

  “What’s the matter?” Euan asked.

  “I just- I guess I don’t want staff to ask why someone else is coming up here,” Steve replied.

  Euan laughed. “I’m sure they won’t mind. Nice room, too. Feels like being back at my cousin’s cottage in Lampeter.” As he spoke, he placed both hands on Steve’s hips, leaning in and kissing the nape of Steve’s neck.

  Steve gasped and shuddered a little. It felt good. He leaned back against Euan, feeling how strong and warm Euan’s arms were as they wrapped around him gently, pulling them closer together. He could also feel a hardening bulge pressing against him gently. “Already?” he asked.

  “It’s been a while,” Euan replied, easily spinning Steve on the spot and leaning in to kiss him.

  Steve sighed into the kiss. He was eager as well, but also a little nervous. Euan really was a gorgeous man, and, though Steve was excited to see Euan undressed, he couldn’t help but wonder what Euan would think of his own naked body. Steve stepped back towards the bed slowly, Euan mirroring each step, until they collapsed onto the soft duvet, Euan on top of Steve, their kisses deepening, tongues teasing one another.

  Almost in unison, each reached for the other’s shirt. Steve began pulling Euan’s t-shirt off at the same time as Euan’s hands slid underneath Steve’s. Euan paused, sitting up and swiftly taking his t-shirt off. His body was as beautiful as Steve had expected. Strong all over, broad chest and shoulders, large hairy pecs, and the slightest hint of abs above a lightly hairy, slightly fat belly. He was what Steve’s friends called a “cub”, a young man with all the makings of a bear, who was not quite there yet. Steve wondered what Euan would look like with a full beard. He pulled Euan down, kissing Euan’s neck, rubbing their cheeks together.

  Euan lightly bit into Steve’s neck and Steve, without thinking, spread his legs, feeling Euan’s weight move between them, their still clothed crotches rubbing together. Euan gripped under Steve’s t-shirt and pulled it up. Steve sat up a little as Euan did so, and as soon as the shirt was off, Steve nuzzled and licked Euan’s strong, hairy chest. Euan smelled of manliness in its purest form.

  Steve gasped when Euan pushed him back down onto the bed with one hand, moving in to kiss and bite some more at Steve’s neck, and now his exposed chest. Steve bucked up and held himself there as Euan continued moving over his body, nibbling, licking, and kissing. Euan hesitated, his breath hot over Steve’s nipple. Steve understood the unspoken question.

  “Yes,” Steve whispered, shivering in anticipation. He loved having his nipples played with, and it was always one of the highlights for him, building the sexual tension more than any other act put together.

  Euan lightly gripped Steve’s nipple between his teeth and Steve moaned. Euan flicked his tongue over the nub as he held it, and Steve wrapped his legs around Euan’s hips, grinding their rock-hard cocks together, desperately wanting to remove their jeans and yet not wanting the sweet torture to end just yet.

&n
bsp; As though reading Steve’s mind, Euan moved over to the other nipple, his hand at the same time gliding deftly between their tangle of legs and in seconds undoing Steve’s jeans. Moments later, Euan was gently gripping and squeezing Steve, only the fabric of his boxers between Euan’s hand and his cock. Euan dropped the weight of his hips between them, almost completely trapping his hand, and entirely taking away any control Steve had through bucking and grinding. Now every moment of pleasure Steve had was up to Euan.

  Euan’s other hand slid over to Steve’s still wet nipple and rubbed it, as Euan continued to gently bite at Steve’s other nipple, his hand still squeezing and releasing Steve’s cock. Steve was trapped under Euan’s weight, unable to move anything but his arms and head, so he wrapped his arms around Euan’s back, feeling how wide and strong it was. He was also surprised to feel that it was also lightly hairy. Steve had never been with someone who had a body like this before, and it felt like he had discovered his type. Everything about Euan was just right.

  Euan toyed with Steve more and more, using each new sensation to bring Steve to the brink before moving onto something else. It was unfair, and it was amazing. Steve wanted to stay like that forever, being teased and brought to the edge and back over and over by Euan.

  Euan’s hips raised just a little bit, and his hand began to pump Steve rhythmically. At the same time, Euan released Steve’s nipples, using his other hand instead to prop himself up as he kissed all the way up Steve’s neck to his ear, which Euan nibbled lightly. Steve moaned, pushing and bucking as hard as he could with the little room he had, eager to finally get his release. And, just like that, Euan dropped his hips again, stopping all movement.

  “Do you want to cum?” Euan whispered.

  Steve groaned. “Yes, yes please. I’ll do anything… just… please.”

  Euan hummed, his breath warm on Steve’s ear. Then, biting down harder on Steve’s earlobe, Euan began to rock his hips hard, their motion moving his hand on Steve’s cock without releasing an ounce of pressure, the tightest firmest grip Steve had ever experienced. The same motion kept Euan’s hairy chest grazing against Steve’s still-wet nipples, faster and faster. It was all too much, the pleasure building up was irresistible, and Steve gripped Euan’s back hard, his hips pushing against Euan’s weight as he came, his cock throbbing harder than ever before as his hot cum shot out as hard and abundant as a shaken can upon opening.