Serenity (Forever Book 1)

by India R. Adams

  Dereck mumbles to me out of the corner of his mouth, “Here comes the sweet side of Miss Pea,” as he sits next to me.

  Because of Sky’s alarming glare, Rocco explains, “It was either that or Buttercup.”

  Dereck sings a crappy interpretation of Pig Latin. “Ix-nay on the Buttercup-ay.”

  Sky’s face forms a scowl. “Buttercup?”

  Rocco is backpedaling into a steel wall. “Uh, well, see, it’s actually very sweet of me—”

  “Rocco!”

  He jolts. “Your hair is the color of homemade butter, and you’re the size of a teacup… dog.”

  Oh. My. God.

  Rocco peeks out of one eye.

  “Chewbacca! Did you just refer to me as a poodle?”

  “Chewbacca? I’m not hairy.”

  “Neither am I!”

  After dinner, the older waitress clears our plates. “Need anything else?”

  Skyler smarts off, “Apparently, I need some Purina.”

  The waitress—who knows us well—smacks Rocco on the back of the head. “Telling that child she looks like a dog…” She walks away mumbling.

  I push on Dereck’s shoulder. “You two are distracting us. Sky and I have to finish this homework.”

  “I hear ya. Maybe I will enjoy a woman-free house for a bit.”

  Rocco asks, “Mama Faith still out of town?”

  “Yep. Conference.”

  I say, “You’ll miss me, Hamilton.”

  “Already do. Come on, Chewbacca.” Dereck gets up after kissing me.

  Roc smirks while gesturing his head toward Sky. “I’m her ride. I get to stay.”

  Like a child, Dereck stomps his big foot. “I want to stay.”

  I point at a grinning Rocco. “Chewbacca doesn’t get to crawl in bed with his girl tonight, so stop bitching.” Rocco’s grin falls.

  Dereck’s frown is no longer upside down. “This is true.”

  Roc mumbles, “This is bullshit.”

  I walk quietly through the house, thinking Dereck is probably asleep, but an unfamiliar noise draws me to the back patio. Believing my ears are playing tricks on me, I cautiously follow the music calling to me. And then, I hear his voice.

  The back doors are wide open to the pool and cooling night. It’s still raining, and Dereck is playing his guitar. I don’t know the song, but as he continues to sing, I completely understand what Faith has been saying this whole time. Dereck’s voice is the most beautiful sound in the world. Deep, rich, and country. Simply put, food for my soul.

  Not seeing me, Dereck stops singing and strums his guitar while staring out into the darkness. I hold still and listen till the song ends. As I slowly walk to him, Dereck smiles. “I didn’t hear you come in. I thought you were going to call when you were on your way home.”

  I eye the guitar resting in his lap. “I, uh, was enjoying the rain.”

  Making room for me, he places his guitar on a stand that is usually in his room. “Me, too.”

  I straddle him. “That was beautiful.”

  He grabs my hips. “You’re beautiful.”

  My eyes shut, feeling him under me. I’m getting lost in a developing sensation inside my body. There’s no pain, no ache, no guilt, just an awareness in my stomach. My head leans back as my body arches to feel more of him. I rest my hands on his chest and feel his breathing becoming erratic. This only stirs me more and makes my body move.

  His hands tighten, pulling me to his arousal. Releasing me, breathlessly, he says, “I’m sorry, Serenity. I shouldn’t have done that.”

  Opening my eyes, I seductively lean forward. “Don’t remove your hands from me.”

  Dereck stares at me as his panting breaths wisp across my face, and his hands timidly find my hips again. I shift my weight forward. Dereck moans as his eyes close and his head leans back. I understand. I feel the need in me also.

  My body insists on moving again, and my eyes shut. The concentration between us is so heavy, so heady, we both begin gasping for air as I continue to move. My eyes reopen when I suddenly know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I want more. We go still—motionless—as we decide whether or not it is time. It’s been months, and Dereck and I, as a couple, are in a different place now.

  I whisper, “I’m ready.” There is nothing I want more than to be with him tonight. Our eyes don’t break contact as I lean forward. My mouth hovers above his for a moment, then I slowly kiss him. His eyes shut as his need for me takes control of his body.

  I make love to my friend, my everything.

  “The rest of my siblings want to meet you. My dad went home and bragged about you.” Dereck waits for my response as I sit in his robe, on the kitchen counter. We slept in this morning. I think we’re still exhausted. He pulls a bowl out of the microwave and hands me the warmed soup his mama made before leaving town.

  I grin as I blow on my spoonful of lunch. “Should I be scared?”

  He leans against the counter while waiting for his bowl to warm up. “Terribly spoiled, but harmless.”

  “Well, have your people call my people, and we shall see.”

  “Spoken like a true Hamilton in training.” As he grabs the bowl from the microwave, he watches for a reaction. Lately, he keeps speaking of marriage. Whenever I ask for my IOU list, he says, “You’re letting this nonsense go when we marry, right?”

  “I don’t have good examples of marriage, Dereck. Do you?”

  He exhales. “No. I guess not. Wait. Roc’s parents rock. But I’m the product of an affair.”

  “What? Your dad said he married Faith.”

  “For a short while, but Dad went back with David’s mom. Mom signed a prenup, but Dad insisted on taking care of her. She won’t say much other than she and he had to do what was right. I think that decision crushed her, but she never talks bad about him.”

  Pain of the untold love rips through me. They once had passion.

  “Now I have a brother, Colt, and two sisters, Chloe and Cali.”

  “I’m sorry.” The sun lights the room, but I still feel the sadness from this story.

  “Why?” The microwave beeps, so he opens it.

  “You deserve the fairy-tale family.”

  “My life is one to envy, Serenity, so have no pity for me. I have a great mom and dad that had to make sacrifices. For whatever reason, they could not be together, but I have the best friends in the world and a girlfriend who makes my life worth living.” His eyes sparkle.

  Heart, be still.

  “Not to mention, the money that’s attached to me. Out of my personal savings, I could buy you a helicopter tomorrow, if you wanted one, and still be set for life.” He knows I’m getting uncomfortable but pushes on. “I have millions, yet you hold on to this ‘list’ like a pit bull. Why does my money make you uncomfortable?”

  “It’s your money, Dereck, not mine—”

  “Fine. Marry me. Then this argument can finally end.”

  He’s being borderline rude. I put my bowl down. “First of all, you just sucked the romance out of this proposal. What the hell is wrong with you? Second, I’m seventeen—”

  Dereck is to me in a heartbeat, his eyes full of regret. “I’m so sorry.” He grabs my face. “I’m sorry—”

  I lean back as he tries to kiss me, but he holds on as if losing me.

  “Please don’t pull away from me,” he begs.

  I stop and try to read him. “What is this about?”

  He stares back at me, opens his mouth, but stops himself. Then he hides his face in my neck, wrapping his arms around my waist, sliding me closer to the edge of the counter. “Nothing. Nothin’s up, Baby Doll.”

  I pull his face from hiding. “Look at me. I love you, Dereck, and have every intention of marrying you, i
f you want me—”

  He’s nodding desperately. “I do. I—more than—”

  “But… not till after college.”

  His eyes close in defeat. I rest my forehead to his. There’s much to discuss, but frankly, I lack the energy. I’m still so emotionally battered and bruised because of my parents. Why is Dereck pushing this? “You tired, Mr. Hamilton?” Without opening his eyes, he nods and kisses me so tenderly it melts my heart, confirming I will marry him someday. “I love you. Finish your lunch, then let’s lie down.”

  “Serenity.” My mom sounds ghostly, distant. “I need you.” Walking through a house I don’t recognize, I follow the haunting call. I see stairs and believe my mom is down there. But as I head down, her voice suddenly changes, sounding peaceful. “Serenity? Where are you going?”

  “I’m looking for you.” I can’t see her yet but am so glad I’m close. I want to feel her this way—so beautiful and calm. At the bottom of the stairs, I’m disappointed to find the cold water again. Even though I’m not in my old home, this damn chilling water finds me.

  “Serenity! No!”

  My heart and body tense. Is it him? I choose flight and catapult myself forward to escape. Suddenly I’m immersed in the water, trying to get to the surface. I feel the waves his body is creating as he gets closer. I scream under water as his hands grab my upper arms, pulling me to the surface and back against his chest. He’s dragging me backward! As soon as my feet reach the ground, I spin in his arms and swing violently, desperate to be freed. I’m terrified of being captured and terrified to find my mother dead again. I have to know. “Did you kill her?”

  “What? Willow?” Father asks, possibly toying with me.

  As I swing frantically, I hear, “No! Don’t touch her.”

  Relief almost feels the same as terror. “Dereck! He has me!” I squirm and push off Father’s chest, but he won’t release me.

  “What’s happening?” Father asks, confusing me further.

  Dereck’s voice trembles. “Trust me. Let her go.” Father’s arms finally release me. My legs quickly pull me backward through the water for an escape, but concrete walls are trapping me. “I’m here, baby. Shhh, open your eyes.”

  I’m trying to listen for my dad’s whereabouts, so I whisper, “He’s here. In the water. I’m trapped.”

  “Not anymore. He ran away. Can I come to you?”

  I touch along the walls, crying, looking for Dereck. “I can’t find you.”

  “Shhh, just listen for me. I see you. I’m coming. Shhh, here I am. Baby Doll, I’m right behind—” His glowing light warms my back, so I spin around and throw my arms around his waist. His wet arms engulf me. His relief is as grand as mine as we exhale, finding each other. He says, “You have to bring her down slowly, or she fights for her life.”

  My eyes slowly open, and I recognize the walls. They are the pool walls. “Dereck?”

  He rocks me side to side. “There she is.”

  “I’m in a pool.”

  “Me, too,” Dereck replies.

  “Me, three.”

  I jump. Dereck only tightens his hold. “It’s okay. It’s just Josh.” He twists his upper body so I can see behind him. Josh waves. He’s in the pool, too.

  Trying to understand what just happened, I timidly say, “Hi, Josh.”

  His hand lands on his chest. “Hi, baby girl.”

  Eyes, worried eyes, surround me. Jolene, Rocco, and Skyler stand on the pool patio. Sky tells them, “I told you it was scary as hell to see.”

  Dereck talks calmly, but I hear his hidden worry. “Serenity, you’re shaking like a leaf. You with me?” Trembling, I nod and try to apologize, but Dereck doesn’t seem interested. He scoops me up and rushes out of the water and into the house.

  Jolene hands out towels. “Her lips are blue.”

  Josh is pulling off my shirt. “Texas is hot every day except for the one day Serenity takes a dip in the pool?”

  Josh and Dereck are stripping me down and wrapping me up. Dereck glances up and stops moving. “What the hell are you doing?”

  Rocco has his shirt halfway off. “Body heat.”

  Skyler peers around the room, so Dereck asks, “And what are you doing?”

  She smirks. “Looking for Edward, Jacob, and the tent in the snow. Apparently Serenity has the role of Bella.”

  Dereck laughs as he goes back to toweling me off. “This ain’t no Twilight scene. Roc. Put your damn shirt back on.”

  “Technically, that scene was not in Twilight. It was in the third installment—”

  All heads, including my trembling one, turn and stare at Josh. He shrugs, “What? Joles made me watch them.”

  “I guess I made you read them, too?”

  Rocco gasps in apparent horror, his palm covering his mouth. He sounds like a lost child. “El Ca-pee-ton?”

  I’m wrapped in blankets, sitting on Dereck’s couch and snuggled next to a clothed Rocco, when closet Twilight fan Josh brings me some hot tea. My shaky hands welcome the warm cup, and I love the almost boiling sensation going down my throat.

  In dry clothes, Dereck walks around the corner, drying his hair with a towel. Studying Josh’s dislocated jaw, he asks, “What’s wrong with you?”

  Josh points at me. “I told her it had some kick.”

  “What?” Now Dereck’s jaw hangs as I swallow the last drop.

  Jolene smacks the back of Josh’s head. “You put alcohol in her tea?”

  Josh—rubbing the back of his head—defends himself. “I thought she’d sip on the toddy. Not guzzle it like a damn construction worker with his cold beer.”

  A fabulous warm sizzling sensation penetrates my frigid body. My cheeks relax, as do my shoulders. I grin as the tea spreads throughout my body. “I feel much warmer.”

  Rocco talks over all the surrounding laughter. “Technically, your blood is thinning, and that is the worst thing for ya, but what the hell, bottoms up! Who needs one?” He stands, abandoning his post.

  “Me!” Josh shouts.

  Rocco cringes. “I can’t talk to you yet,” he says and shakes his head as he walks away.

  Josh follows him. “What? It was a romantic series.”

  A shriek echoes from the kitchen.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  My Personal Prayer

  Nightmares are down to one a week. Dereck is relaxing more and more with my dad confined. Knowing I’m struggling with worry for my mom, Dereck now takes me to visit her. We bring fruit and flowers. There are rules, though: I’m not to go in the house by myself.

  I don’t think this is Dereck trying to control me. I believe this is compassion. He doesn’t want me to face my mother alone. I’m grateful not to be alone in this anymore. She’s always drunk now and has been fired from her job. The shadows seem to be gone, but the damage can’t be denied. It’s a pitiful sight and drains me every week, but she’s my mom, so I go, regardless. I replace the rotten fruit with new, in hopes that maybe next week it will be different—my mom will be sober.

  The Crew and I have a couple of drinks, chillin’ out but not ending up looking like the dilapidated woman on the couch. I wonder, why the difference? Why can we have two and stop?

  Jolene once asked, “Can’t we get her help?”

  Unfortunately, it doesn’t work like that. I’ve tried. Faith says alcoholics have rights, too. I called the paramedics; mom refused them. They asked her her name, where she was, and if she wanted to cause herself bodily harm. She gave all the correct answers. The paramedics explained that my mother can do as she pleases.

  Maybe if she’d had a “Dereck” when she was younger, life would have turned out differently for her. Faith says, sometimes, when living it up like there’s no tomorrow, a person wakes up and wonders where yesterday went. Sometimes, they do
n’t wake up at all. I think that is what’s happening to my mom. I think the cloaked one was right. The constant drinking and drugs left a gaping hole in my parents’ lives that they can no longer fill. It allowed in the darkness that is swallowing them whole. According to my visions, they’ll be back in another lifetime, trying again.

  Dereck’s tires hum down the road as they take us back to his house. “You okay?”

  Staring out the window, I’m deep in thought about others’ futures. “I was just thinking of all the mes without yous.”

  His silence fills the cab of his truck. “Um, I’m not sure I understand.”

  “What about all the kids who have no one to make it all better? I’m smart enough to know I’m a lucky one.”

  Staring over his steering wheel, Dereck tilts his head.

  Even though my life is hard, I have the fairy-tale prince to see me through. These problems are happening in households all over the world. Will those victims find their prince, in whatever shape or form they need? Will their destiny be one of strength, to see them through the hard times and awful memories?

  Then I sense her—the one who wrote in the journal, the one from my dreams, the one I saw in the hospital the night I almost went there because of Father. At that moment, she feels like another version of me. A part of me out in the world somewhere. I can’t help wondering, is she living her destiny?

  Dereck finally speaks. “Serenity, to handle a thought like that, I have to have faith and know there’s another plan for them. As special as I find you, it doesn’t mean they are not just as worthy of a happy ending, like hopefully you will have. They’re just on a different path. But if they hold on to what they know deep in their hearts, they, too, will find some peace in this crazy world. I believe that’s the agreement we made before we came.”

  Inhale. I just inhale and smile as I watch him speak what feels so right to me.

  He grins, pointing at his cheek. “Mmm, can I have some of that sugar right here, please?”