The Wrong Wedding

by Maggie Rivers

  And there better not have been any sex last night, buster.

  She continued, her voice rising, “And nobody better find out about me being in this cabin with you, you … you playboy you. My reputation, mine,” she pointed her thumb at herself, “not yours, is at stake!”

  “My reputation is at stake,” Jack mimicked waving his arms in the air and prancing around flinging his arms as Claire had done.

  He continued, “Well, my reputation is at stake here, too, and I intend for everybody to find out we bloody hell had wild kinky monkey sex hanging from the bloody chandelier! I have to give the damn newspapers something to write about.”

  Claire gasped.

  “The hell you will! And watch your mouth!” she said shaking her finger at him.

  “Lady, you’ve been cussing like a sailor ever since I got up.”

  “That’s different!”

  “Just how’s that different?”

  “Well, it’s …, it’s …, oh, I don’t know. It just is.”

  Jack combed his fingers through his hair as he sauntered passed Claire and headed into the kitchen.

  “All I know is that before we get anything annulled, I need coffee … or a stiff drink. I don’t much care which. I got a hell of a hangover,” he said over his shoulder.

  “I don’t have time to have coffee, I’ve got to get home before Ralph finds out I’m not there. Now do something!” She turned to follow Jack keeping her eyes glued to his tight butt as he passed by.

  Claire’s cell phone rang. Finally managing to tear her gaze away, she looked down at the purse she still held.

  “Seems your purse is ringing.” He smirked. “Or you could just ignore it and keep ogling my butt instead.”

  “You hush, don’t you dare say a single word until I hang up this phone, you hear me? And I was not ogling!”

  “No problem, I just want my coffee,” Jack said as he made his way into the kitchen and started fumbling with the coffee pot. “And yes you were.”

  Claire pulled out her cell phone and flipped up the cover.

  “Hi Ralph dear. How are you this morning? No, no. I’m fine, just fine.” She stuck her tongue out at Jack.

  Jack leaned up against the counter mimicking Claire’s words as he glanced down at the marriage license he’d pulled from Claire’s clutches once again.

  “No, I’m not home yet, dear. I, uh, uh, I spent the night with a friend. I’ll tell you all about it later.” She glared at Jack.

  Jack whispered, “Your face may freeze like that.”

  Claire turned her back to him.

  “No, no, I’ll be home in about an hour. Yes, I’ll just meet you there. Yes, good-bye, dear.” Claire flipped closed the phone and returned it to her purse.

  “Ol’ Ralphie boy getting a tad bit anxious about your whereabouts is he?” Jack sipped his cup of coffee. “Wait’ll he hears how I had you screaming for more last night.”

  “His name is Ralph, not Ralphie,” Claire said as she turned to face Jack. “And he better not hear any such thing. Not a single solitary person better hear anything about this, this, whatever it is.” She again shook her finger at him.

  “And no, Ralph and I are having breakfast together this morning. He trusts me. He’s not concerned in that way at all. I’ve got to go now.”

  “What, no time for coffee? Just wham, bam and thank you sir. I feel so used. Now my feelings are hurt,” he said with a pout on his face.

  “You’ll get over it, I’m sure. I’m sure you can find some hotsy totsy to have coffee with you. Just give one a call and tell her I couldn’t stay long enough for coffee but I did appreciate the sex. I’m sure she’ll be right over.”

  “Funny.” Jack took another sip.

  “I trust you’ll get this marriage thing fixed?” she said while grabbing the license out of Jack’s hand and slinging it in his face. “You caused this, buster.”

  “Dragging me up here for God knows what, “she continued. “I’d take care of it myself but I don’t have time. I have to meet Ralph and then I’ve got things to do before the wedding. I’ve got to get fitted again for my wedding dress and check with the caterer for last minute decisions.” She rubbed at her forehead. “And nobody better find out about this either, you hear me! Here’s my cell number. Call when you need me to sign something. And it has to be done today, do you understand me? So get this thing fixed. Today!”

  Claire headed toward the door.

  Quickly turning back around she said, “And I want proof by four o’clock this afternoon. Four o’clock, bucko. And don’t you dare screw this up either, Mr. Romeo in sheep’s clothing. You, you, you disgusting pervert!”

  Jack watched her as she stood with her hands on her hips barking orders like a drill sergeant and not being too nice about it either.

  “Hey sister, I want this thing set straight as much as you do. If a thing like this leaks out, it could ruin my reputation. And, by the way, I may be a Romeo or even a playboy but I’m no pervert! And just for the record, I wouldn’t marry you if you were the last female on earth. Now, how the bloody hell did we wind up in this mess anyway?”

  Jack watched tiny crease lines spring up on Claire’s forehead.

  “I’m, I’m, well, I’m not exactly sure. I don’t remember a whole lot about last night other than being at Sam’s Place for my bachelorette party. I kept telling the girls I couldn’t drink. I have this allergic reaction to something in alcohol,” she said.

  Jack watched as a puzzled look crossed her face.

  “I distinctly remember the room beginning to spin,” she said. “Don’t remember much after that.”

  “Yeah, what are friends for if not to get you passing out drunk? My friends certainly succeeded. I do remember something about a Justice of the Peace though.”

  “Well that probably explains this marriage license. Where are we? Whose cabin is this?” Claire waved her hand encompassing her surroundings. “And how’d we get here?”

  “It’s my cabin, but the how we got here part, I haven’t got a clue. You got a car?”

  “Yes, why?” she asked.

  “Well, mine was parked at my house back in town. The guys picked me up to go drinking so we must’ve driven your car up here.”

  “Well, I don’t have time to wait around here to figure all this out. Ralph’s on his way to meet me for breakfast. Call me when you get that license thing taken care of. I want a copy of the papers just so I know for sure you’ve done your job. I don’t trust you. But I do know one thing; you better not screw this up. I better have a legal document that takes care of this mess in my hand at 4 o’clock today or there’ll be bloody hell to pay. You got that, mister?”

  Claire shoved the marriage license into Jack’s hand. Removing her car keys from her purse, she headed for the door.

  “Sure thing, honey. Anything for the ‘little missus.’ And I use that term loosely, you know. What was your name again?”

  “It’s on the paper,” said Claire as she grabbed her coat up off the floor and opened the door. Then screamed.

  Dropping his coffee cup, Jack bounded over the counter and grabbed Claire, pulling her backwards into him before her scream ended.

  “What’s--”

  “Look at that,” she gasped, “it’s snow.”

  “Woman, I thought you’d seen a bear or something.”

  Jack looked out the doorway.

  He continued, “Yeah, so it’s snow. In December. In Colorado. Imagine that. What the bloody hell’s wrong with you, lady?”

  “I know, I know, but it’s almost halfway up the door.” She clasped her hand to her mouth.

  “Yeah, it is. And this is a fine mess, I might add. Priscilla’s going to be pretty well pissed as hell at me.” Jack caught the scent of Claire’s hair and inhaled deeply. He tightened his grip around her waist and with his other hand began to slowly rub up and down her arm. He could feel her backside pressed against him and for just a moment he forgot about arguing with her. He nuzzled her hair
.

  “What are you doing? Let go of me!”

  “Sorry, old habits die hard.” Jack released his hold and stepped back.

  “This may be a fine mess for you but how am I going to get out of here?” Claire looked around the room trying desperately to put cohesive thoughts together.

  “You aren’t going any place, babe. We’re stuck here until they get the roads passable.”

  “How long will that take?” she asked, afraid of the answer he was going to give her.

  With a shrug of his shoulders Jack replied, “Last time I got stuck up here in these mountains, it took ‘em about five days to get up this far.”

  Jack watched as the color drained instantly from Claire’s face and she dropped to the floor in a dead faint.

  CHAPTER TWO

  “Bloody hell.” Jack stood looking down at Claire. “Damn women always passing out at my feet.” He chuckled. “Right, Wakefield, that’ll be the day.” Reaching over her slender body, he slammed the door shut. Then, bending down, he picked her up in his arms and walked to the sofa.

  Smells nice. He nuzzled her hair again. Like strawberries and almonds. Can’t weigh more than a flea on a tadpole. Placing her gently on the couch, he stuffed a pillow underneath her head. Jack sat there for a moment staring down at the woman.

  “I probably should loosen her clothing so she gets more air.” He grinned. “That’d piss her off royally.”

  He lightly slapped at her cheek but got no response.

  “Okay, loosen the clothing it is then,” he said as he looked for buttons on her sweater. “No buttons. Okay, this could be fun.”

  Reaching underneath her sweater he ran his hands behind her back and undid her bra hooks. Then he undid the snap of her jeans and loosened the zipper a bit.

  “There, that’s better isn’t it?” It is until she comes to, at least.

  Jack sat staring down at Claire’s face. You have cute freckles. Still no response from her.

  “Hey, hey, uh,” Jack picked up the license from the coffee table and scanned it quickly. “Claire, Claire.” Again he lightly tapped at her face.

  Claire began to stir and opened her eyes, squinting up at him. “What happened?”

  “You fainted.”

  “Oh … no I didn’t. I don’t faint.”

  “Sweetheart, you can call it what you want, but one minute you’re standing there complaining about some snow and the next minute you’re unconscious on the floor. I’d call it fainting myself but you call it whatever you want. Makes no difference to me.”

  Jack could almost see the wheels of thought turning in Claire’s mind.

  “Snow. Snow! Oh God, the snow! What am I going to do? I’ve already told Ralph I’d be back at my house in twenty minutes. Now you tell me I can’t get there for days.”

  Shoving Jack out of the way, she quickly stood up. He could tell the room began to swirl for her and she instantly plopped back down on the sofa.

  “Take it easy. Blood’s got to get back up to your brain so it can function.”

  Jack watched as Claire began to notice her clothing’s disarray. She quickly zipped and snapped her jeans. Her hand reached around to where her bra had been hooked. Anger rose on Claire’s face.

  “What did you do, you pervert?” Why is my bra undone and why were my pants unsnapped?” She slid a little further away from Jack.

  “I was just doing as the rescue books say and letting you breathe better. You should be thanking me instead of yelling at me!” Jack’s voice rose again with each word. “And I’ve already told you, lady, I’m no pervert!”

  “Thanking you, thanking you? I will not thank you for undressing me while I was unconscious.” She looked down to be sure body parts were covered. “And were you insinuating there’s a problem with my brain?”

  “Nope. Not at all. Back off sister,” Jack said as he held his hands up in the air as if to say I give. “It just needs some blood before you go trying to get up is all.”

  “I’ll be just fine, thank you very much!” Claire replied as she rose from the sofa and reached underneath her sweater, awkwardly re-hooked her bra and began to pace back and forth.

  “I can’t stay here for days. I’m getting married Saturday. This can’t happen. You just go find your snow shovel and dig my car out of this mess. I’ve got to be home in twenty minutes.” Claire threw her hands in the air.

  “Ralph will just kill me. Married. Of all things. Oh my God. I’ve got three days left of freedom and I’m stuck up here in a cabin with you, you kidnapper! This just can’t be.” She whirled to face him.

  Continuing, she said, “This will not do.” She stomped her foot on the floor. “This will just not do at all. Do you understand me! This can’t happen. I absolutely forbid it. Get me out of this place! Get me out of here now!” she said, shaking her finger in his face accenting each syllable as she shrieked.

  Hysteria crept into Claire’s voice and took over. Her hands and arms beat the air wildly. Her animations seemed to help the words fly from her mouth like darts as she continued to erratically pace back and forth.

  “This is just too much. I can’t stay here. I’ve got to get out. I’ll just have to walk back. That’s it, I’ll just walk back. How far is it to town? Where the heck am I anyway? Where’s my car? You’ve got to get my car out!” Tears gathered at the corners of her eyes. “I can walk. It shouldn’t take me long. You’ll have to walk with me. There could be bears or mountain lions or, or, or moose or elk or something …”

  Jack could see she was beginning to make no sense at all. Only one thing to do for a hysterical woman. Taking the glass of water he’d brought from the kitchen for Claire to drink, he pitched the water directly into her face.

  Surprise registered on Claire’s face as water dripped down and soaked into her sweater. Her arms stopped flailing at the air and her eyes grew large. She gasped.

  “Bu bu bu bu …” She tried to speak. She gasped again. Her eyes widened even more. “What the …”

  “Sister you’re crazy if you think I’m digging your car out from under six feet of snow.” He knew his anger showed on his face. “You’ll just have to call Ol’ Ralphie boy and tell him you’re stuck up here in my cabin and you’ll see him in however long it takes for the snow plows to dig us out. Or do you want me to call him for you?”

  Claire gasped. “Oh, don’t you even dare think any such thing!”

  Jack’s cell phone rang.

  “That one’s mine,” said Jack, “and no talking from you either.”

  “My pleasure,” Claire snapped.

  He could feel her eyes shooting angry bursts of sarcasm straight at him.

  “Morning Priscilla,” said Jack after picking his cell phone up off the counter and flipping it open. “Yes.”

  Claire watched as Jack listened.

  “Yes.”

  Jack shifted his weight from side to side.

  “Yes.”

  He walked over to the window and stared out.

  “Okay. Okay.”

  Turning back towards Claire, Jack rolled his eyes and with his hand made a mouth yapping motion.

  “Yes.”

  Claire took interest in the fact Jack seemed to be bending to this Priscilla’s orders.

  “No. Okay. Bye.” He closed his cell phone, walked over and placed it back on the bar.

  “Well, that sounded like mama was handing out the orders. She got you whipped?” Claire said feeling the agitation in her voice. She had read about Jack’s engagement in the newspapers and tabloids but it hadn’t bothered her then.

  She didn’t quite understand why she should feel so perturbed with Jack’s phone call. It was almost as though she were jealous. Jealous had never been a word in her vocabulary before and she had no idea why it sprang to her thoughts now. She definitely was not jealous of a man she’d only actually met a few minutes ago.

  “She’s just finalizing some last minute stuff for her wedding and needed my opinion.”

  Claire t
urned and walked back over to the sofa and sat down in front of Jack who had resumed his spot on the edge of the coffee table. She’d caught his inference to Priscilla making last minute decisions for ‘her’ wedding.

  “I noticed you didn’t bother to tell her you were stuck up here with me.”

  “Well, I noticed you didn’t tell Ralphie boy you wouldn’t be there for breakfast this morning either.”

  Claire shivered.

  “Bloody hell, I’m sorry. You’re sitting there wet and it’s freezing in here.” Jack jumped up and headed for the fireplace. “I’ll get a fire started.”

  He knelt down and placed some logs in the fireplace and lit the kindling underneath. A few moments later, the fire caught and began to glow.

  Returning to his seat on the coffee table he said, “It’ll be warm in here in a few minutes.” He could see tears beginning to form again in Claire’s beautiful hazel eyes.

  “Thank you,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “Oh God, what am I going to do? This is just too much. What am I going to tell Ralph?”

  Ralph had always handled everything. Ever since they were kids, Ralph had been her protector and she allowed him to be. Life was just easier that way. It wasn’t that she couldn’t make her own decisions. She’d made plenty every time Ralph was gone. It was just easier this way.

  Ralph had made all the decisions. She had never had to do anything but follow along with whatever Ralph planned. Ralph was her secure haven from the world.

  She needed that safety to offset the cruel blow life had dealt her at birth and Ralph was her rock. She desperately needed him now. She didn’t want to have to think. She didn’t want to have to be in charge.

  Jack cleared his throat.

  “What about being honest with him? Won’t he understand you spending the night in a secluded cabin with another man?” Jack’s eyes twinkled.

  “Absolutely not!” Claire replied, shock registering in her eyes. “Ralph is a minister!”