Series Starter : Firsts in Series Collection

by Kaylee Ryan

  “I don’t want time away from you, McKinley. You’re going to be my wife. I take that very seriously. It may not be a traditional marriage in the sense of why we decided to do it, but it will be a real marriage. I won’t hide things from you and I won’t keep you separated from anything in my life.”

  “I…I wasn’t sure, and I wanted to give you time,” I try to excuse my actions.

  “I don’t need time, baby. You’re a part of this. I’m always going to want you wherever I am, just remember that. I always want you.”

  His words cause my heart to race. I will it to slow down, reminding myself he’s just being nice. He’s appreciative of what I’m doing to help him keep his daughter. He feels obligated to have me there. He’s blurring the lines and I have to hold strong. I can’t let myself fall any deeper than I already have, or I fear I won’t recover from it when it’s all over.

  I should have thought this through a little better. Regardless, I would not have changed my mind. All that matters is keeping Lexi with Evan. This is for Lex.

  “McKinley, oh, give me a hug. It’s been too long,” Carol says. She’s got Lexi in her arms.

  “Hey, Carol,” I say, giving her a one-armed hug. As soon as Lexi sees me, she grins big and holds her hand out. It’s almost like she’s reaching for me, but I know she’s not. When I step back from the hug, Lexi begins to whimper.

  “It’s okay, sweet girl. Grandma’s got you,” I say, stepping close to her and placing my hand on her back. She again holds her arm out and I want to take her, like I know she wants, but I can’t. Carol needs time to bond with her as well.

  Evan steps close and places his hand on the small of my back. “She loves you,” he whispers in my ear. I fight to not break out in tears. I love her too, so much more than I ever thought possible.

  Lexi is still fussing and just like me, Evan can’t handle it. He reaches out and takes her from his mom. “She just needs time to warm up to this,” he says gently.

  “Oh, by bedtime I’ll have her used to me.” Carol grins. “Let’s get you inside. Everyone is dying to meet her and see both of you.” I don’t miss how she includes me.

  With Lexi in his arms and his hand on the small of my back, Evan guides us to follow his mom into the house. Carol leads us into the living room where his grandparents are both sitting in matching recliners and his dad is sitting on the couch looking more frail than I’ve ever seen him, his feet propped up on a pillow on the table.

  “Is that my granddaughter?” he asks. His voice is husky.

  “Hey Dad. Yeah, this is Lexi.” I expect him to drop his hand, but instead, he guides me to the couch. The three of us are now standing in front of his father. “Have a seat, babe,” he says to me.

  I sit next to his dad and gently touch his arm. “Good to see you, Jeff.”

  “McKinley, girl, it’s been ages,” he says, patting my hand.

  Evan kneels in front of us. “Dad, this is Lexi. Lex, this is your grandpa.” Lexi is watching Evan’s dad just as she did Carol. She doesn’t crack a smile, her tiny face so serious. Evan sits her in his dad’s lap and leans back on his heels. I can see what this moment means to him. He’s worried about his dad, the cancer eating away at him. I know he was scared this moment would never happen, worried his children—Lexi—would not get to meet his dad. Evan confessed that before the “wedding” talk started, he was trying to work up the nerve to ask me to take this trip with him.

  Lexi holds her arm out for me and I slip my finger into her tiny hand. “Who’s got you, Lex?” She babbles at me, telling me all about it. I keep talking to her, letting her hear my voice. Once Evan see’s she’s going to be okay with his dad, he takes the seat next to me on the couch. His arm goes around the back and he angles his body toward us, so he can talk to his father and take in the sight of him holding his little girl.

  “She’s a beaut, Evan,” his dad comments.

  “Yeah, she is. I told Kinley she’s not dating until she’s thirty,” he laughs.

  “Oh hush, you,” his mom joins the conversation.

  “Don’t be hogging all the loving, son,” Evan’s Grandpa Lexington chimes in. “I need to meet the angel who carries on the family name.”

  Just as he says the words, Lexi lets out a shriek and leans into me. Instinctively, I grab her and pull her into my arms. Her chubby little hands grab at my face as she smiles and shrieks again. Evan rubs her back as he chuckles, and to anyone watching us, we look like the happily little family we’re about to be, but for how long?

  Chapter 37

  Evan

  Tonight, has been…overwhelming. I never thought I would be an emotional sap seeing my parents with my daughter. When Mom held her, I got choked up, but when Dad held her, yeah, I had to bite my damn tongue to keep the tears at bay. Mom made dinner, and the rest of the night was spent passing Lex from one person to the next. That is up until about ten minutes ago when she decided she was done. I took her from Mom, who hasn’t stopped smiling since we pulled in the drive.

  “I’ll make her a bottle,” Kinley offers and scurries off to the kitchen. I watch her go, because, well…she’s gorgeous.

  “You’re smitten,” Mom calls me out.

  You have no idea. “She’s been there from the beginning. I owe her everything.” I try to deter the conversation.

  Dad laughs. “Evan, you look at her like I still look at your mother. You sure this is a good idea?” he says hesitantly.

  Is this a good idea? Hell, if I know. Do I want to marry her? Yes, without question. Is it just to keep my daughter with me? No, it’s not. Can I confess that to them? I’ve always been close to them, but this… “No reservations,” I tell them.

  “Does she know?” Mom asks.

  I look at the door leading to the kitchen, watching for her. I don’t want her to hear this and make what we’re about to do awkward. “No.” I pretty much just lay it all out for them in that simple word. My parents are smart and can read between the lines. This is more for me.

  I’m fucked!

  They don’t get the chance to say more as Kinley walks back into the room. Lexi is snuggled up on my chest, eyes wide as she watches my parents. At the sound of Kinley’s voice, she lifts her head. “Here you go, baby girl.” Kinley hands the bottle to me.

  I settle Lexi into the crook of my arm and she begins to eat. Her arm reaches out and Kinley doesn’t hesitate to offer her finger for Lexi to hold on to. Lexi goes back to eating, never letting go of Kinley. Her other hand is grabbing at my chin, so I offer her my finger as well. She locks on tight and settles. Kinley’s eyes find mine and she smiles my smile.

  My girls.

  Just as Lexi finishes her bottle, Kinley yawns, which causes me to yawn as well. It’s been a long-ass day, and I’m ready for bed. “I’m going to lay her down,” I say to Kinley.

  “I’ll help you set up the pack-n-play.” She stands from the couch and I follow her upstairs. My grandparents’ house has four bedrooms, so Mom made up both rooms, one for me and Lexi and the other for Kinley. She pulled me off to the side earlier and said she wasn’t sure if we wanted to share a room, so she got the other ready just in case.

  Kinley sets up the pack-n-play while I change Lexi’s diaper and get her into her pajamas. She sleeps through it all. She’s been such a good girl today and travels so well.

  “She’s out,” I say as I lay her down.

  “Yeah, she’s had a big day.” Kinley kisses the tips of her fingers and presses them to Lexi’s forehead. “I guess I’ll see you in the morning,” she says and looks back at Lexi one last time before walking away.

  I reach out and grab her arm. She stops and looks over her shoulder at me. “Stay,” I whisper my request, scared as hell she’ll turn me down. I’ve slept a handful of nights with her beside me and as far as I’m concerned, it needs to be that way from now on. She’s going to be my wife after all.

  “Your parents,” she offers a meek excuse.

  “We’re adults,” I counter. A
dults who will be married in just five days. “It’s been a long day, McKinley. I just want to hold you.” What is she doing to me? “I’m going to go downstairs to rinse out her bottle and tell everyone goodnight. I’ll be back in a few.” I don’t give her time to argue. Instead, I kiss the top of her head and leave the room, hoping like hell she’s in my bed when I get back.

  My grandparents went to bed hours ago, and I can tell that Dad has reached his limit as well. I find them in the living room and pick up Lexi’s bottle. “We’re all going to bed. It’s been a long day.”

  “Did you all find everything in your rooms?” Mom asks. I know she’s hinting to see what our sleeping arrangements are.

  “We’re good, Mom. I’m just going to rinse this out and then head back upstairs. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”

  In the kitchen, I wash the bottle and place it in the strainer. I hear my parents as they head to their room. There are two bedrooms upstairs and two downstairs. Dad’s weak all the time, so they occupy the second “in-laws” suite, as it’s called. I wait until I hear their bedroom door close and take the stairs two at a time.

  I enter my room and release the breath I didn’t even realize I was holding. Kinley’s standing in the middle of the room in nothing but a pair of panties. She’s digging through my luggage with nothing but the light from her cell phone, I assume for something to sleep in. Closing the door and turning the lock, I reach back, grab the neck of my shirt, and pull it over my head, all the while walking toward her.

  The room is dark, but I can hear her with each rapid breath she pulls in. Reaching out, I snake my arms around her waist, her bare back now flush with my chest. Resting my chin on top of her head, I hold her. Her head rests against my heart and I know she can feel it as it thunders inside my chest. It’s all different with her. Every touch is…more.

  “Arms up,” I say, releasing her. She complies and I slide the shirt I just removed over her head. As soon as she drops her arms back to her sides, I’m hauling her back against me. Everything is different with her, it’s…more.

  “Let’s get some sleep.” I pull back the covers and wait for her to climb in, following right behind her. As soon as I drag the covers up over us, she backs into me and I wrap her in my arms, just like I have each night we’ve shared a bed.

  “Night, Evan.”

  I hold her a little closer. “Goodnight, baby.”

  Chapter 38

  McKinley

  The week has flown by. Evan and Lexi have gotten to spend a lot of time with his parents and grandparents. Lexi warmed up to them by the end of day two. Now it’s like she’s been around them since birth. Tonight, is our last night with them before my family and Jeff’s parents arrive. Day after tomorrow, we’re getting married.

  “Mom, yes, I’m sure he hasn’t seen it. It’s not like this is going to be a real marriage. Why are you so worried?”

  I’m currently up in our room, or Evan’s room, talking to my mom. “Honey, it’s a real wedding and your first, so, of course, I want this to be perfect.”

  I fight the urge to roll my eyes. “Carol showed it to me the day it was delivered. Evan was outside with his dad and grandfather. She has it in her room.”

  “Good. I just talked to her too, and the flowers will be delivered early Saturday.” She rambles on about the wedding.

  It’s hard not to get caught up in the excitement of it all, especially when I fall asleep with his arms around me each night. He always finds little ways to touch me—hand on the small of my back or on my knee, arm around the back of my chair. It’s endless.

  He calls me babe in front of everyone and doesn’t care who hears him. He even slipped up and called me baby last night when he asked me if I was ready for bed. His mom heard him; I could tell by the smirk on her face. Evan didn’t seem to notice or care. He just said his goodnights, picked Lexi up, and guided me up the steps.

  This sweet, caring, charming, sexy-as-hell man is going to be my husband day after tomorrow. Yeah, it’s hard as hell not to get caught up in that. He makes it all feel real.

  “So, either Evan or I will be at the airport to pick you up. I don’t know that both of us will come, so there will be enough room in the Durango for your luggage.”

  “Great. Our flight lands at three,” she tells me.

  “Sounds good. I’ll see you all tomorrow then.”

  “Love you,” Mom says as we end the call. I drop my phone on the bed and fall back against the pillows. Staring up at the ceiling, I think about living with him every day, taking care of Lexi together. It’s what we do now, but I don’t live there. I’ve spent the night a handful of times, but this is different.

  “Hey, babe,” Evan says from the doorway.

  Turning my head to face him, I smile. I can’t prevent it; he does that to me. “Hey, Lex with your mom?”

  “Yeah, I actually asked her to watch her for a few hours. I thought maybe you and I could get out of here for a little bit.”

  “Really?” I don’t even try to mask my excitement. We’ve pretty much stuck to the house all week, and not that I don’t love his family, but getting out for a few hours sounds great.

  “Yeah, it’s nothing fancy. Just thought we could take a ride, maybe grab some dinner,” he suggests.

  “Perfect. When do we leave?” I grin.

  This causes him to laugh. “We can go now, baby. You ready?”

  I look down at my skinny jeans and sweater. “Am I dressed okay for what you have in mind?”

  “You’re perfect.” He leans in and kisses the corner of my mouth. “Let’s go say bye to Lexi and get out of here,” he says, grabbing my hands and pulling me from the bed.

  Once I’m standing, he laces his fingers through mine and we walk down the stairs side by side. We find his parents in the living room on the couch, Lexi eating up their attention. “We’re headed out,” Evan says, stopping in front of them. I try to drop his hand, but he holds tight. Bending over, he gets eye level with Lexi. “You be a good girl. Daddy and Kinley will be back in a little while.” He kisses her cheek and she shrieks.

  With my hand that’s not occupied by Evan’s, I reach out and tap her nose. “See you soon, sweet girl.”

  Evan pulls me from the room and out the door. “Where are we going?”

  “Well, there’s a diner not far from here that my grandparents would always take me to when I would come to visit. They have great home-cooked food---comfort food.” He grins.

  It’s right on the tip of my tongue to tell him I’ve had so many meals this week I don’t think I will fit in my wedding dress, but then I remember he doesn’t know about the wedding dress. “Sounds good.”

  He opens my door for me like the gentleman he is, only this time, he leans in and kisses me before pulling away and closing the door.

  As we drive to the restaurant, Evan reaches over and laces his fingers through mine. My heart flutters in my chest. I never had a chance in hell to not fall for him.

  The restaurant is not busy for a Thursday night, so the waitress tells us to seat ourselves. Evan leads us to a booth in the back and I slide into one side as he goes into the other. “It’s all good here,” he tells me, handing me a menu.

  “Chicken and Dumplings,” I say with way more excitement than I should have for a simple meal. “It’s been forever since I’ve had that.” Decision made, I close my menu and place it on the table.

  “That sounds good, but so does the homemade chicken pot pie.”

  “That does sound good,” I agree. It really does, but I’m still sold on the dumplings.

  “Are you nervous about the wedding?” he asks after we place our orders.

  “No. Are you?”

  “Surprisingly, no.” He reaches over and takes my hand in his. “You’re my best friend, McKinley. You’re putting your life on hold in order for me to keep my daughter. The only thing I’m feeling is admiration. You’re an amazing person and I will never be able to repay you for what you’ve done for me and Lexi.�
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  “You don’t have to. I love her, Evan. She needs to be with you. You’re my best friend too, and that’s what you do for your friends.”

  “Thank you, McKinley Rae,” he says, his brown eyes holding mine.

  The waitress brings our food and the conversation moves from how delicious it is to how much extra stuff we have to take home with us. “Really, Kinley, Mom has gone nuts with the shopping. It’s a good thing we didn’t fly,” he says, taking a drink of his water.

  “Yeah,” I giggle. “She’s just doing what grandmas do. She’s excited and she knows you’re doing this on your own.”

  “I have you,” he counters.

  What do I say to that? Nothing. I ignore it like we do most other topics, which we should discuss but don’t.

  “Try this.” I once again change the subject. I scoop up a big bite of my chicken and dumplings and hold it out for him. He doesn’t hesitate to lean in and wrap his lips around my fork.

  “So good,” he says after he finishes his bite. “Try this,” he mimics me and offers me a bite of his pot pie.

  “Delicious,” I say, covering my mouth with my hand.

  “Right?” He grins.

  We enjoy the rest of our dinner with easy conversation. It’s always easy between us. “Where to now?” I ask once we are back in the car.

  “I thought I would take you to one of my favorite spots.”

  “Is that all I get? No hints?” I pout.

  “You’re cute,” he says, tapping my nose just like I do with Lexi. “My grandparents own some property not far from their house. It has a huge pond, and every time I visit, Gramps and I spend a lot of time there. When I came to visit a few months back, Dad came with us. It was good to spend time just the guys. It’s always been my favorite spot, and I want to share it with you,” he says sheepishly.

  “I can’t wait to see it,” I tell him. I really can’t. Anything that’s important to him and makes his eyes light up like that, I’m in.