Bitter Thorns (The Entwined Book 1)

by Chrissy Jaye

  She walked over to me, a smile on her face. “Probably. Now strip woman or I’ll have to call the boys.”

  I snorted at her commanding tone. She wouldn’t really call them if I refused, would she? Taking a moment to examine that thought, I considered her with a frown. She was all smiles and sunshine but behind all that, there was a seriousness in her eyes.

  “You really would, wouldn’t you?”

  She nodded enthusiastically. “Yep. Your safety is more important than your modesty.”

  I sighed and started pulling off my dress. “So, do I have clothes for later?” I staggered, feeling a bit dizzy with my arms over my head. Someone grabbed my waist to keep me from falling over. Once I got the dress over my head, I looked around to see Brooke, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was staring at my back with a dark look in her jewel colored eyes.

  Her gaze flicked up to meet mine for half a second before she threw her arms around me, hugging me from behind. It was almost funny since she could easily tuck my head under hers. Almost. She wasn’t really hugging me for me, but for herself. I knew how ugly my scars were and most people couldn’t hold themselves together when they saw them. She’d seen me naked before, but I think this was the first time she allowed herself to see them. I closed my eyes and leaned into her and patted her arms awkwardly. Brooke just seemed to know what she could and couldn’t do with me.

  “Okay. Naked hugging is done,” I cried out, forcing a laugh when she held on a second longer than I wanted her too.

  “Right, sorry!” Her voice was stiff, like she was still struggling with whatever she was feeling. When she spoke again, her voice was back to normal. “Get out of those panties. There’s a towel on the bed and I brought your robe up earlier. It’s on the back of the door.”

  “Thanks, Brooke,” I said, trying to put as much feeling and meaning into it as I could so she’d know it wasn’t just for the clothes. It was the best I could do to let her know I appreciated her.

  I really did like her, the realization made me sad. I mean, I’d known that I was warming up to her. The curvy blonde was easy to be around. Did she know how broken I was? That I would never love her half as much as she would try to love me? I peeked at her as I wrapped a white towel around myself.

  Fuck! I took several fortifying breaths, trying to keep the tears at bay. I definitely did not like this feeling. I wanted to be in control. I’d done enough crying to last me several months. Crossing the room with more confidence than I felt, I snagged the hunter green robe from the back of the door.

  “Let’s go get sweaty,” I called, eliciting another giggle from her.

  Fuck. My. Life.

  That’s all I could think as I stared around the sauna, still wrapped up tightly in my robe. I was squished between Ben and Vian on one of the benches that ran along three walls. The guys must have been in here for a good fifteen minutes before Brooke and I got there. Each of them had a towel wrapped around their waist, leaving their chests exposed, their skin already slick with sweat. I was doing my best to ignore it, but I dared anyone else not to look in my position. Not my brother, obviously, because eww, but yeah. Admiring people’s bodies wasn’t the same as touching them.

  “You know, most of us have seen you naked,” Liam remarked, a lazy grin stretching across his bow shaped lips.

  “When?” I squeaked, tearing my eyes away from a bead of sweat that rolled down Flynn’s stomach. If I wasn’t already flushed from the heat, I might have blushed.

  “Well, I mean…” Liam looked away, uncomfortable.

  “He means while you were sick. Everyone took a turn taking care of you,” Flynn said from his spot across from me. His legs were kicked out toward the middle of the room, completely relaxed. “But not as much as I did. Still waiting on you to thank me for that.”

  “What a pity that you’re going to have to wait so long then. You don’t seem like the overly patient type,” I teased. My head fell back as I squeezed my eyes shut. Everyone else chuckled.

  “Shall I go into detail about how you kept pressing your—” One of my eyes popped open at the sound of something being hit. Flynn glared at his twin as he clutched the back of his head. I shut my eyes again and smiled to myself.

  Ben leaned into my side. “I know you want to be modest, but the robe is really dangerous to wear in a sauna, especially for how long we have to sit in here.”

  “He’s right,” Lucien said. “I didn’t bring enough water to keep you hydrated and wear that thing.”

  “Yes, please strip,” Flynn said loudly.

  My eyes flew open again as I glared at him. He just smiled back, acting completely innocent.

  “What happened to me not being your type?” I snapped. The words left my mouth before I even thought about them and I internally kicked myself. Why does it matter? It shouldn’t. I don’t care about whether Flynn or any of them find me attractive. So why did I even bring that up?

  “When did he say that?” Ben asked. He sat forward slightly to look at me before turning to Flynn. “Please tell me you didn’t.” Flynn shrugged and rolled his eyes.

  “Umm…” I was suddenly more uncomfortable.

  “Olive, just take off the robe. I will personally kick the shit out of anyone here who bothers you,” Vian said. His voice held an edge of dark promise.

  “Here, I’ll help you,” Ben offered.

  I side-eyed him. “I know how to undress myself,” I replied, trying to keep the bite out of my voice. I stood quickly and shed the robe, making sure my towel was still wrapped tightly under my arms. I folded the robe in half and placed it on the bench. As I sat back down, I noticed everyone except my brother and Brooke were staring at me. Swallowing, I forced myself to relax back in my seat.

  After a few moments of awkward silence, everyone started chatting and the tension slowly leeched from my body. Lucien placed a jug of water at my feet. Right. I’m supposed to drink from that every fifteen minutes. Thankfully, the saltwater was done. This was just regular water with a hint of lemon in it.

  “Drink up, Clones,” Lucien said. Both Flynn and Kieran glared at him.

  “Don’t call us that,” they said in perfect unison, causing everyone else to erupt in laughter. My cheeks hurt by the time I was able to catch my breath.

  “Why do you call them that?” I asked, catching Lucien’s eye.

  He stretched back, folding his hands behind his head and giving me a full view of his chest and abs. “They’re the only set of identical twins in our Circle, and it annoys both of them.”

  Flynn grabbed a towel and threw it, but his aim was off and didn’t hit his intended target. It hit Brooke full in the face which started a mini war as towels flew through the air.

  I let the heat sweep over me as I started to notice the others. I mean, I’d seen them, but it was almost like I was seeing them for real. As if everything from before had been a show and they were finally being themselves.

  Liam was the center of attention, constantly up out of his seat as he talked. He had a habit of touching everyone, whether to brush their legs with his hand, to steady himself on someone’s shoulder, or to lace his fingers with someone to get their attention. I found myself fascinated with the way his muscles bunched and uncoiled underneath his tan skin. His honey blonde hair was damp with sweat and slicked back away from his face, so I could easily see his dilated pupils. So unlike how he normally carried himself. Not so much serious, but sad, like he carried a heavy burden.

  My eyes were often drawn toward Flynn and Kieran as they talked back and forth, laughing. Both of them had a smattering of hair on their chests, though I noticed that Kieran seemed to be a bit bulkier than his twin. Their muscled chests gave way to flat, hard abs. A warmth that had nothing to do with the sauna filled me, and I had to force myself to look away.

  Ben was a great source of distraction. He’d collected one of my hands in his, rubbing his thumb in a delicious circle against my skin. Whenever he did it, a shiver would run up my arm and coil in my chest,
making it hard to breathe. I think he did it on purpose. Every time I broke out in goosebumps, I’d catch him with a secret smile on his lips and his eyes would sparkle like two-toned jewels. At one point, his eyes dipped to my lips and something akin to terror tore through me as I ripped my gaze away from his.

  Lucien was content to sit back with a delirious grin on his face as he watched us all. He kept checking in with everyone, lazily pointing to our jugs of water, reminding us to drink. He winked at me several times when he caught me looking at him around Vian and Brooke. He spent a fair amount of time observing the two of them which made me want to see what was so special about them too.

  The pair of them were close together on the bench, their heads tipped toward each other as they talked softly every so often. Brooke’s eyes met mine a few times, shining with a happiness I vaguely recalled from my childhood. My brain became so muddled, I struggled to bring the memory to the front of my mind, but once it was there, I saw it for what it was. Love. They were in love. My parents used to look at each other that way. I searched within myself, looking for the jealousy I thought I’d always feel if Vian ever found someone he loved, but I couldn’t find it. In the back of my mind though, I’d always thought he and Emma were secretly a thing, maybe I’d been wrong about that.

  “How much longer?” I blurted out, interrupting Liam who was in the middle of an impression of Flynn.

  “Not much,” Lucien answered, eyeing his watch. I wondered how it was still working with so much steam. Probably money. “About ten minutes. How are you feeling?”

  “Umm, okay?” I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to feel different. I was still sort of dizzy from the heat. Or the dried flowers.

  “You’ll probably see a difference when we get out,” Kieran supplied, leaning forward to stare at me. I sucked in a breath as his blue eyes searched my face. Out of everyone, I think we’d interacted the least.

  “What did you guys find out about that hex?” I blurted. Seriously? A hot guy stares at you and you want to know about witchcraft? I mentally kicked myself.

  Wait… No. He’s not hot. Wait. Shit. He is but I’m not… What the fuck was wrong with me?

  “It was a renewal,” he answered honestly. If he saw the war of my thoughts, he didn’t react to it. “Of the growth blocker. That’s what Valek told us, at least. We’re not entirely sure how it got there, but someone will be looking into it.”

  I cut a glance in Lucien’s direction. He’d told me not to worry about it, but if someone knew about the spells they found on me, how had someone set up a renewal? He frowned slightly but I looked away quickly.

  “Oh.” I didn’t really know what else to say. Thanks? It was a bit disconcerting how nonchalant they were about it. I thought back to my conversation with Evan, however brief it was, and I had to suppress a shudder. He was looking for me. But, if that hex was any indication, it seemed someone else had already found me.

  Chapter 15

  Everyone except for Brooke and Vian got out of the sauna. I gave them a lingering look as I left but decided now was not the time to question them about their relationship. No matter how much my curiosity burned. The way they were looking at each other suggested they had something else in mind entirely.

  “Let them be,” Kieran said quietly after I stood in the door a second too long. The cool air hit my skin like a soothing balm as he dragged me away. My fingers were pruney and I wondered if I’d ever properly dry out. Lucien and Flynn disappeared into the house through the sliding glass doors, while Liam and Ben collapsed into sunning chairs next to a pool that looked more like a pond. The water had a slight teal color to it, suggesting that was what it was. It was surrounded by a small patio of white cut stone with a few chairs dotted around it and a natural looking waterfall that bubbled softly on the other side. As with the front yard, the back was also lined with trees and plant life. The whole setup had a very chic natural resort vibe going for it.

  “We’re gonna need more chairs out here,” Kieran remarked. “The ones that we broke haven’t been replaced yet.” He moved to one of the remaining sun chairs and sat, pulling me to sit down with him. Because of his large frame, we just barely fit with his arm tucked over my shoulders.

  “Put it on the list. Brooke planned to do it, but we got distracted,” Ben answered tiredly. His head rolled in my direction. “Notice a difference yet?”

  I thought about it for a second and realized he was referring to my body. Kieran had been right. Out of the sauna, I felt different. Better. Less tense, but there was something else too. I was lighter; my mind clearer. “I feel surprisingly good,” I finally answered.

  He nodded. “Good. Tomorrow I want to look at your levels. Dem sent over some equipment so we could do it at home.”

  “More tests?” I groaned. “No. Just no. I’ve had enough of those.”

  Ben looked at me with sympathy. “I understand but I have to insist. We need to be sure you’re in the clear. I promise I know what I’m doing. I’ve been volunteering in my spare time at the lab.”

  “Plus, you want to get your hands on her again,” Liam quipped from where he was stretched out on his own lounger. I glanced over and then quickly averted my eyes. His towel sat low on his hips, revealing the vee of his abs more and a small bit of his pubic bone. I felt my skin heat.

  “Dude, don’t embarrass her,” Kieran barked, making me jump. His hand smoothed up and down my arm.

  Shit, what were we talking about? I searched frantically for a safe topic. My eyes latched onto Ben. “You really like that sort of stuff, don’t you? Science, I mean.”

  His face lit up. “Yes. We’ve been holding off on careers until our Circle was completely trained. Family will always be our priority. But, yes, I want to go into the research department. There’s still so much we don’t know about what we can do.” The longer he talked, the more animated he became. I couldn’t help but grin at him. Aside from Kieran—who barely talked at all—Ben was the quietest. Well, okay so I couldn’t be completely certain of that. Maybe Kieran was a chatterbox and I just hadn’t seen that side of him yet. Either way, I liked how Ben talked when he was passionate about a subject.

  “You’re doing that thing again with your face,” Kieran whispered in my ear. I clamped my mouth shut quickly and internally cringed. I needed a picture of this look so I could work on not making it. Especially if it was going to garner so much attention.

  “Speaking of training,” Liam said, completely oblivious to what Kieran had just said. “You’ll start yours in the morning. I’m sure we’ll all vote at dinner, but I think defense should be a priority. What happened to you shouldn’t have been possible.”

  “I’m sure Emma did her best with the constraints she had,” Kieran remarked.

  “No, I know that. But she should have had more support. Why the council decided a fifteen-year-old girl in the middle of a coven of undeclared witches was the best idea, I’ll never understand.” Liam sounded angry, but his face was clear. If anything, he looked thoughtful.

  “Why did they then? Send her I mean,” I asked. “Why not just do what they did with Vian?”

  Kieran smoothed my hair down on the side of my head and pressed his cheek against my forehead. I was so interested in getting answers to my questions, I didn’t even bother to swat away Kieran’s affections.

  “They couldn’t,” Liam stated. “Your file—Look, it’s clear you’ve had a much harder life than any of us imagined. But you were under observation by people who would have fought tooth and nail to keep you. Witches are much more integrated into Human society than we are. They would have locked you up and—” He stopped abruptly, a haunted look bleeding into his eyes. My heart sped up as I recognized what was happening. He was reliving something, and I hated myself for doing that to him.

  “I understand,” I rushed to say. “I get it.” He didn’t have to say anything else. The details weren’t important, especially if they caused him pain.

  Liam stood up and stretched before flash
ing me a mischievous grin. The look from before was completely gone and I sighed in relief, returning his smile. “I’d cover your eyes, Ms. Modest,” he said throwing his head back to whip his blonde hair out of his face.

  “What?” I asked but it was too late.

  His towel dropped, flashing me with his impressively toned ass before he jumped into the pool, splashing us all in the process.

  “You asshole,” Ben shouted, jumping up. His towel fell to the ground before he launched himself into the pool on top of Liam.

  Holy fuck. How was I going to survive living here if they insisted on flashing me?

  Kieran chuckled behind me as I stared with wide eyes. “You’ll get used to that,” he said, adjusting his arm around me. “Circles are not modest. Or secretive,” he added.

  “Yeah, I think I’m starting to get that,” I muttered still a bit stunned.

  “So, these scars,” he said, making me tense and forget about the two naked men wrestling in the water.

  “I don’t want to talk about it,” I said quietly and cringed. “But if you have to know, ask Flynn or Vian. You have my permission,” I added quickly. Ugg.

  He tucked a finger under my chin and turned my head toward his. His blue eyes were like deep pools, full of concern. “You’re not the only one who’s suffered here. I’m not trying to undermine your pain and I won’t go into details, but you should ask Lucien about his past. Liam doesn’t like to talk about it, but Luc will. You’re not as alone here as you think.” When I didn’t speak, he pulled my head forward between two hands and kissed my forehead before cradling me against his body.

  He was being sweet, really. I logically recognized that, but emotionally it wasn’t that easy for me. I couldn’t just magically change how I was and open up to them. I’d admit to trying. Part of me wanted them to like me. And I wanted to like them too. But I could never be what they wanted me to be. Trusting. Easy. Open.