Illiam
Page 3
“Are you able to clear the atmosphere?” she asked. “My transmission can’t get through. Maybe if you can thin the atmosphere, someone can hear my request for help.”
I can’t do that.
She nodded once, refusing to allow a fresh wave of disappointment to distract her. Instead, she began to chew her lip as she prioritized the work that needed to be done.
—(|-|)—
Elysa hid in her broken starship after a long day of failed repairs. Dejection hung heavy over her. All signs pointed to the inevitable conclusion: she was shipwrecked.
Now everything depended on her transmission, but nothing had changed. Her distress call continued to reflect off of an impenetrable atmosphere.
She ate a meal, habitual and without thought. Finally, Elysa prepared her crashcouch for sleep, stretched out, and swore she would never rise again. Not unless her transmission was finally answered.
She understood she was being melodramatic, and that if she had to survive on this planet, there were things she needed to do. But she just couldn’t imagine starting that work. Not yet. Committing herself to that effort would mean she was prepared to actually live here.
But the heart of the matter was that she could never fix the reactor—not with what she had on hand. And, without a working reactor, she could never do anything more than survive.
Illiam was interesting, but Elysa knew enough xenology to understand that she could do more harm than good when it came to the sentient planet.
She would need to handle Illiam carefully. Not only would her survival depend on it, but all its future associations with humankind would now be shadowed by her amateur interactions.
Elysa considered the black pill secured in her medical kit. As far as she was concerned, carrying one was standard procedure, a common practice for anyone who spent as much time in space as she did. Nobody wanted to starve or freeze to death, so the pill was a small piece of insurance that she could always die by choice, instead of suffering...if it came to that.
Would isolation qualify as suffering?
Elysa shivered at the thought and queued her favorite comedy onto her ship’s console. She’d hoped it would make her feel better, but it only reminded her of Ulani.
She couldn't afford to believe in karma, but maybe after everything she’d done to Ulani, fate was giving her exactly what she deserved.
Elysa turned off the show before finishing the episode. She rolled over but couldn’t get comfortable. She pulled the transmission log to the forefront of the screen, and watched the return signal: a flat line at 100% that kept growing longer. Nothing changed.
Nobody knew she needed help, and nobody would know where to look.
She lay there, waiting for sleep to claim her. She watched the return signal, begging for it to change values. All she needed was a tiny opportunity for her plea to escape the atmosphere. But nothing changed.
So, Elysa fell asleep monitoring the unwavering line that traced her predicament.
IV
—thunk—
Elysa’s bunk rocked as the sound resonated in the cabin. Reflexively, she scanned the nearest panel for information on the ship’s status. The display reminded her she was shipwrecked.
She turned over to go back to sleep.
—thunk—
The sound came from the airlock side. Sighing, she checked the video feed. The eight-limbed aeluri stood beyond. He raised his paw, preparing to strike the Onyx a third time.
—thunk—
Elysa considered ignoring it.
What did it matter if the cat broke her airlock? And if Illiam really wanted to destroy her ship, there wasn’t anything she could do that would make a difference.
—thunk—
There was no point in putting off the inevitable. Elysa walked from the couch, donning her holster and pack as she passed through the airlock.
She opened the door.
The aeluri fell back from the hatch and eyed the pistol with comprehension but didn’t react. Elysa glanced beyond him to see the sun glinting through the trees.
She blocked the sun with her hand and looked around.
Her ship was surrounded by animals. Ground critters clustered nearest to the ship, while the largest predators lingered in the back. None of them were more intimidating than the aeluri.
They stood unnaturally still, waiting. For something. For her.
Elysa inhaled and held the planet’s air within her lungs. It felt as if she’d never taken a proper breath in her life.
The aeluri took another step back from the airlock.
“Illiam?” Elysa asked the cat.
She understood Illiam actually was the entire planet but realized the need to simplify her viewpoint into something comprehensible.
“Can I call you Illiam?” she asked the aeluri. Then, feeling silly, addressed the watching animals. “This aeluri, I mean. I need something—someone—to represent you for me. It’ll help me communicate.”
The aeluri dipped his head in agreement. You may call me Illiam.
“Thank you.”
I have something to show you. Illiam lowered to his stomach, inviting her to climb onto his back.
She considered resisting, telling Illiam she needed to go back to sleep, but curiosity stopped her. Elysa strode to the aeluri and pulled herself on. She wrapped her hand deep into his scruff.
“I’m ready,” she said.
The aeluri responded by rising to his full height. Elysa tightened her legs around its sides. She rode the animal with fluidity, allowing her hips and back to sway in rhythm with the creature's gait.
The animals surrounding the starship parted as the aeluri carried her through their ranks. They followed her as they left the clearing, marching far too orderly for normal animals.
As she rode on the back of the aeluri, her confidence grew, her hope built. She might be shipwrecked, but she had Illiam. She wasn’t alone.
This wouldn’t be the life she’d wanted. Nor was it the one Ulani had planned for them. But this would be a life that she could live. That had to be enough.
As Illiam climbed up and out of the valley, Elysa studied the morning sun, as it glided from behind the mountain, drifting upward as its full disc became visible.
She began to sweat in the heat of the journey. Her throat was growing dry with thirst.
Maybe she could ask Illiam where they were going, but she recognized this path. And as the aeluri began to climb the hill towards the cave, she wrapped her arms around his neck, nuzzling into his fur, so that she wouldn’t fall.
As they neared the cave, the animals began to scurry with excitement, sprinting ahead into the cavern. Others climbed the low trees, seeking a vantage point.
When the aeluri reached the cave’s entry, he lowered his belly to the earth, and Elysa slid to the ground.
Look.
She looked where the aeluri did, beyond the cavern and above the wide river valley. Her gaze found the scar in the canopy where the Onyx lay broken.
The sun was now fully illuminating the valley with bright, bold daylight, allowing her to see more colors in this single snapshot than she’d known in her entire life.
Look, Illiam repeated.
The cat turned and began walking into the cavern. Elysa followed. The dark cave was lit, filled by ambient light.
Strange luminous rocks had been placed around the perimeter of the cave, providing an eerie, but practical, glow. The side of the chamber had been filled with bowls made from the shells of a hard fruit that’d been cleaned and halved.
The bowl had been filled with a kind of food, something not unlike a berry.
Eat, please. I studied your biochemistry and think you’ll find it agreeable.
Her lenses agreed with his analysis, and Elysa selected the ripest-looking one, placed it on her tongue, and bit into it. A burst of sweet juice filled her mouth.
This whole planet is ripe for you.
Like everything else, the fruit overwhelmed her senses.
She picked up a second bowl; this one contained freshwater. She drank it all.
She walked deeper into the cavern. There, she discovered Illiam had made a bed for her from giant leaves. Firewood was collected in the opposite corner.
Illiam had provided a safe nook for her. This was a place she could call her own.
A fraction of her wanted to stay angry at Illiam for presuming that her spacecraft wasn’t enough, but Elysa knew there was something right and organic about this gift.
The Onyx had been her residence her entire adult life, but it was lodging fit for a wanderer. This cave was something that could become her home.
She thought of her little black pill, still tucked away in her medkit, and Elysa knew she couldn’t sleep on the ship another night. Illiam, either by accident or intent, had given her what she needed to survive. As much as it made Elysa ache, she knew the Onyx couldn’t meet her needs anymore.
“Thank you,” she told the aeluri.
Illiam shook his fur and turned away from her. He strode to the mouth of the cave, where he laid down on the landing and began to groom himself in the midday sun.
The other animals retreated back to the forest below, all guise of Illiam’s control released.
Determined to make this her own, Elysa began to inventory the food.
It wasn’t everything she wanted, but she could survive on this planet that called itself Illiam.
interlude
Illiam rounds the sun again.
The planet had taken eons to develop into the complex being it had become—to form the mountains that were its height and the oceans that were its depth.
It had grown in isolation and by instinct. There was nobody to explain what a planet was, and yet, it became one.
Once, there had been no questions because there was nobody to answer. Now that the Elysa-human was with Illiam, it had someone to mirror to Illiam what it was.
So Illiam grew.
Not by shaping sandy beaches or studying the flow of lava. But because of its Elysa, Illiam became something more than it had ever been.
Illiam
and Elysa
round the sun
again and again...
V
The morning light became too intense to ignore, and Elysa turned to her other side, longing to drift back to sleep. But it was hopeless—she was awake, and another day had begun.
She looked across the cave towards the sleeping Illiam. The aeluri that she had come to see as the planet itself, was twitching in his sleep.
She studied Illiam’s muzzle. Had it always been that white? She didn’t think so. He was growing old. There were other changes too, more subtle ones; the cat was less prone to play and tended towards sleep more than he once had.
She understood that he wasn’t really the planet and that when the cat died it could be replaced by another. Regardless, they had shared too many adventures together. They were companions.
Elysa had aged too. She saw it on those rare occasions when she visited the Onyx to check her relentless transmission. Or those times when she had a new idea on how to repair the vessel, only to be disappointed when it failed. She would glance at her reflection in the mirror and quickly look away.
The crow's feet at the corners of her eyes had grown deeper, and her limited diet had stripped fat from her bones.
Elysa pushed aside the blanket and stood. The aeluri continued to sleep.
After years with only Illiam for company, her desperation for human company had only grown. Fortunately, today her loneliness was like an old injury, a familiar ache that she understood even if she couldn’t shake it.
Elysa carefully stepped around Illiam’s paws and contemplated what to eat for breakfast.
The stony pantry looked so different from when she’d first arrived. Now it overflowed with her supplies. She’d built shelves from wood logs and filled them with bowls and woven baskets she’d made.
As Illiam had chosen it, but Elysa had prepared it, and the cave had become her home.
Their home.
The walls were decorated with drawing made from chalk and charcoal. She had collected other things: stone daggers that she had sharpened and small river stones she thought were pretty. Illiam even had his own corner, overflowing with the odd toys that she had made for him.
She heard the movement of Illiam’s large body and saw that the cat was shifting. Elysa grabbed a fistful of dried berries and sweet-nuts and put them in a clean bowl. She poured herself some water.
She took her breakfast to the bed and settled herself next to the cat. She ate while Illiam studied her with one sleepy eye.
“I’m running low on sweet-nuts,” she said. Illiam’s animals could bring her more, of course, but she had long learned the value of doing work herself. It gave her a sense of satisfaction on a planet that seemed capable of doing everything. And usefulness kept the darkness at bay.
It’s a long hike. Illiam stretched.
“Perhaps,” Elysa scratched the cat behind its ears with both hands, “but it’ll be an adventure.”
Illiam purred under her attention. It meant he agreed. They would look for the sweet-nuts today.
The sweet-nuts grew at the waterfall that defined the jungle valley. Hiking there took the better half of a day. Technically, she would be able to go out, harvest, and return all in one day, but there was no pleasure in that. No reason to rush.
Instead, Elysa preferred to spend the night at the falls. It was mid-summer, and she wouldn’t need the protection of her cave.
There wasn’t anywhere else she needed to be. There never was. As always, she imagined her own busyness and the drive for productivity. It kept her sane. Or at least, as sane as could be expected.
Her life on Illiam was completely unlike her time on the Onyx. There were no delivery dates to meet or maintenance to complete. There wasn’t even Ulani, begging her to spend less time with the antiquated starship.
Maybe that was the greatest irony of all. Ulani had asked her to give up the Onyx, and now Elysa avoided the ship as a reminder of the life she had lost.
Elysa started collecting food for their trip into a woven sack she’d made a while back. She tied the bag to the stone-tipped spear that doubled as her walking stick.
Like many things, the spear was unnecessary. Illiam allowed its animals to run wild, but it could always stop any predators before they attacked.
Upon realizing the full extent of Illiam’s powers, Elysa had stored her pistol in the Onyx and made her first spear. She had asked Illiam only to intervene if she was in danger for her life.
Then she’d taught herself to hunt with the spear. Over years of practice, her aim had improved to the point that she could take down many of the ground animals.
She understood that this was just another of the many games she’d created for herself, but they weaved the illusion of a productive life.
Over the years, there had been good times and dark ones. She had learned to respond to them as she might the seasons, and even her darkest moods had become familiar.
It wasn’t that she had given up. She still found the courage to try new approaches to fixing the Onyx, even if they always failed.
Regardless, she was still able to hope—most of the time—but maybe, hope was just another survival game.
So, Elysa did what she could to keep herself busy. If that meant using her time to hike to a distant waterfall, harvest some nuts, and hike back…so be it.
She tied a few empty bags to her spear and told Illiam that she was ready to begin. Together, they stepped from the cave and into the morning sun.
The hike to the waterfall was straightforward. They simply had to follow the river upstream until they reached their destination. The path was shaded, and the river ensured cool water was readily available.
Despite its simplicity, this had become one of Elysa’s favorite hikes. It was uphill, and it challenged her endurance. She had to watch her step, and the movement kept her occupied.
Closer up, the waterfall was actually two falls. The higher one was the one visible from her cave. It rose tall, the king of the valley. But the water pooling at its base gave way to a shorter, stouter fall. The sweet-nuts grew at the landing between them.
Even though the sweet-nuts grew high in their trees, harvesting was fairly easy. Illiam and Elysa had long ago developed their preferred method.
Illiam called five young maliums from the surrounding forest. The creatures were monkey-like, but with eight-limbed and bluish coloring. The maliums jumped through the canopy, playing to see who could knock the most sweet-nuts below.
Meanwhile, Elysa chased the rattling sound of falling nuts. She did her best to collect them as fast as the maliums knocked them down.
Illiam watched from the rocky shore, his paws submerged in water while his back soaked in the sunlight.
Once her bags were full, Elysa set them aside and stripped off her jumpsuit. Over the years, it’d become worn in spots and patched in others. She washed it in the water before hanging it on a tree.
Then, finally, now that her work was done, she jumped into the pool, the water refreshing against her hot skin. She drank her fill, cherishing the water that she knew Illiam kept clean for her.
Illiam joined her, and she climbed onto his back and jumped into the water. As she landed, she splashed the curious maliums who were wading at the water's edge. Three of them screeched with disapproval while the others lingered.
When the sun hung low in the sky, she climbed to the top of a large boulder and laid down on it. The hot rock smarted against her naked back, but she welcomed the sensation. She laid before the sun, allowing it to deepen her already darkened skin.
Illiam mimicked her, stretching out nearby. Soon, she heard the giant cat sigh and guessed he had fallen asleep.
Yet Illiam spoke within her mind, Tell me a story. Tell me of the woman that you once loved.
Elysa’s heart raced as she snapped up into a sitting posture. “What?”