The Love Island Bookshop

by Kate Frost

  ‘Three of them are. The little boy in the pale blue T-shirt, he’s Aaron’s son.’

  ‘He’s what?’

  A look of realisation crossed Tasha’s face. ‘He hasn’t told you, has he?’

  ‘That he has a son. No.’ Freya caught sight of the little boy darting behind a tree and out again, giggling at his older cousin. He couldn’t be more than two or three. He was dark-skinned with gorgeous chubby cheeks and a mop of dark-brown hair.

  ‘And if you’re wondering, that’s his mum.’ Tasha pointed to the young Maldivian woman standing by a table that had been set up along the shaded back wall. She was slender and had long black hair tied neatly on one shoulder. She hadn’t once looked in their direction. ‘It’s all been a bit of a scandal,’ Tasha continued. ‘As you can imagine, Mamma was less than happy about Aaron not doing the decent thing and marrying Zahida when he got her pregnant.’

  Anger wrapped itself around Tasha’s words. Freya had no idea what to say.

  ‘Was this your idea or Mamma’s?’ Aaron was by Freya’s side again, his venom aimed at his sister.

  After such a ridiculously happy couple of days, Freya wanted to be anywhere but here. She didn’t know what to say or think.

  Aaron took Freya’s hand and manoeuvred her away from Tasha and everyone else to the far side of the garden. The palm leaves cast long shadows on the ground but perspiration erupted above her top lip and in the small of her back.

  ‘What the hell’s going on, Aaron? You have a son?’

  ‘I’m so sorry you found out like this.’

  ‘So you weren’t planning on telling me at all?’

  ‘It was a messy break-up – I don’t see them often.’

  ‘I’ve literally just met your sister, but she’s mad at you. Mad at me. What the hell?’

  Aaron glanced behind them. The kids were making a racket, still running around. Tasha and Zahida were now talking, and the two men were sitting at the table. Aaron’s mum returned from the kitchen holding two bowls of food and handed them to her daughter. Freya sensed they were being watched.

  Aaron took Freya’s hand and led her out of the garden and down to the beach. There was no one about apart from a local man sanding the side of a boat.

  ‘My sister’s mad because Zahida is her best friend.’

  Freya drew in a breath. It was even hotter down on the beach in the full glare of the sun. She’d been looking forward to another home-cooked Maldivian meal before they left, and now she was faced with spending the next hour sitting round a table with three women shooting daggers in her direction.

  ‘But he’s your son?’ Freya frowned. ‘Even if you’ve fallen out with his mum, that’s something I would have expected you to tell me. For you to be proud of?’

  ‘You’re reading way more into this than you need to.’

  Even though they were far away from everyone, Freya lowered her voice. ‘Aaron, we slept together last night. How do you think I’d feel about it?’

  ‘I didn’t think we’d see them. We’re not together any more...’

  ‘It’s not about that. It’s trust, it’s communication... It’s not like we haven’t talked about our lives, our pasts...’ Freya trailed off, a sudden stabbing guilt that there was stuff that she hadn’t told him because she found it too painful to talk about. But having a son was completely different.

  ‘It’s complicated,’ he said.

  ‘Break-ups usually are, more so if a child’s involved.’

  ‘This one was particularly difficult. I loved her and we were planning on getting married, but then she got pregnant... If you want the truth, I’m almost certain he’s not mine.’

  ‘Really? Whose do you think he is?’

  ‘The whole thing’s a mess and complicated; nothing that I want to go into now. I’m really sorry for not telling you. I would have eventually. It’s just what we have has been so good and... I don’t know, I didn’t want to ruin that.’

  Chapter Nineteen

  Aaron was unusually quiet on the boat ride back to catch the seaplane. Admittedly Freya didn’t know what to say either. Their time away had taken an unexpected turn made even more unsettling by them having spent the night together. Although it hadn’t even been the whole night, just Aaron creeping into her room for sex then leaving again. Freya balled her hands into fists and focused on the cooling spray of the water as they sped across the lagoon and away from the island.

  Lunch had been as uncomfortable as she’d imagined it would be. After Aaron’s brief and confusing explanation on the beach, they’d returned to the courtyard. Aaron’s mum had gathered the children together and got them sitting at one end of the table with a firm word in the ear of her eldest grandchild to keep the others quiet and in their seats. Not once did Aaron attempt to engage with his son. He could barely look at him. Freya sat in silence, glad of the distraction of food even though she was no longer hungry. She ate purely to have a distraction, and it was delicious too, home-cooked fish curry with fluffy rice. It should have been joyous being immersed in the real culture of the country with a family. Although Aaron’s mum was fluent in English, and Tasha obviously was too, the family spoke in Dhivehi and Aaron didn’t bother to translate. He barely said a word anyway, only an occasional nod or grunt in answer to something. Zahida was quiet too, not once looking in their direction. Aaron’s mum and Tasha made up for it, along with the two men who Freya discovered were Tasha’s husband and an older cousin. Freya couldn’t wait to leave the table. She thanked Aaron’s mum for her hospitality and retrieved her bag from her room. She waited on the sandy path while Aaron said goodbye to his family on his own.

  Aaron didn’t say a word all the way back to the boat, so Freya had plenty of time to think. It had all slowly become clear. Aaron’s mum couldn’t understand why he wasn’t with the mother of his child and why he was hooking up with some British girl he worked with, while Aaron had been unaware his mother would go behind his back and invite his ex-girlfriend over. But the way Aaron had reacted to his son left her unsettled. It was one thing not telling her he had a son – she could probably forgive him that and understand it might not be the first thing he’d want to tell a new love interest, but to completely dismiss the little boy... He came across as cold and she’d had enough of heartless men who couldn’t deal with difficult emotions.

  Tasha was protecting her best friend rather than her brother. Her brother who’d got her best friend pregnant out of wedlock. It might not seem like a big deal to Freya as it happened all the time back home – she had a handful of friends who were pregnant or had young children and weren’t married through choice or not having got round to it yet, but in a conservative country, and with a traditional family and a mamma who frowned on that sort of thing, it was no wonder his sister was upset. Freya cringed at the thought of the opinion Aaron’s family, his mum in particular, would have of her. From what she’d gleaned, Aaron and Zahida had been in love and were planning on getting married, while she was some foreign girl with loose morals eager to jump into bed with him at the first opportunity. Although was that really fair? He’d invited her to his home. And he’d jumped into bed with her. He’d been the one to slip out of bed in the night, climb down from his room and then back up a tree to climb into hers. And Zahida had a best friend who was looking out for her, a best friend who had taken her side over her brother’s. While she had missed all the signs that her best friend was bitterly unhappy and struggling. She’d missed everything. She’d never asked the right questions, and when it mattered most, she hadn’t been the supportive friend she should have been. She’d been blinded by love and a new relationship with Owen, her attention and time given to that rather than a friend who was struggling. And then that same boyfriend didn’t stick around to support her when she needed him the most. She stared over the side of the boat at the clear blue water zipping by, her tears dripping down into it, lost in its depths.

  ~

  Their arrival by boat at Loabi Fushi was less dramatic t
han when Freya had arrived by seaplane and had her first jaw-dropping view of the island and lagoon. Aaron was in a bad mood. She had felt so optimistic about moving on from the break-up with Owen, but the morning’s events had left her confused and vulnerable. She had let him into her bed and let him inch into her heart.

  Freya pulled her rucksack on and stepped off the boat. The sun was already starting to make its journey to the horizon. Lots of guests were sitting in Reef sipping drinks and she wondered if a lucky couple were on Sunset Beach sharing a romantic picnic. The other staff members went on ahead, and Freya and Aaron walked to the path beneath the trees, away from the restaurants and guest area.

  ‘Are you going to ever talk to me again?’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ he said. ‘About everything that happened today. There were too many people on the boat... It’s hard to talk over the engine noise.’ He stopped in the middle of the path and took her hands. ‘I got completely taken by surprise. I know how uncomfortable that was for you. And it had been so perfect.’ He looked at her pleadingly with his deep brown eyes, and it took her right back to the night before and him climbing into her room and kissing her. That was what she wanted, that was how she wanted to feel, not the messed-up emotions of today.

  ‘I was let down and hurt by someone I thought cared for me. I don’t want any surprises that make me worry we did the wrong thing last night. And it was a shock today, finding out stuff about you in that way.’

  ‘I didn’t mean for it to happen, and I’m sorry I wasn’t honest with you.’ They started walking again along the empty path, the birds flitting between the trees their only company. She thought he was going to say more; it was an opportunity for him to open up and elaborate on the situation that had played out, but he remained silent all the way to the staff village.

  ‘I’m going to dump my stuff and head to the dive school, catch up with the guys. I’ll see you later, maybe for dinner?’

  There was no one about but she noticed him checking before he pulled her close and kissed her. Her heart was torn in two with desire to repeat last night and savour the feeling of love and happiness she’d woken up with, before confusion and disappointment had spoilt all that over lunch.

  ‘I really am sorry. I should have told you about my... about everything.’

  Freya nodded, but he couldn’t even say the word ‘son’ and he couldn’t have acted less like a loving father around such a gorgeous little boy. She had a lot more questions, but none that felt right asking now. Now they were back on Loabi Fushi, there was little privacy. Maybe last night was just a one-night thing and they could go back to being friends and enjoying each other’s company.

  Aaron’s hands left her waist and he gave her a wave as he set off towards the men’s block. Their relationship had changed though, with a mix of intimacy and distrust. It had changed everything.

  Chapter Twenty

  ‘How was your weekend away?’ Drew slid on to the seat opposite Freya and gave her the biggest grin.

  It was early evening and Freya had been back for a couple of hours. She bided her time, chewing and swallowing a mouthful of food. ‘It was... interesting.’

  ‘Oh my God, don’t do this to me, Freya. I need gossip. I need details.’ She raised an eyebrow.

  Freya glanced round, conscious the courtyard was filled with staff having dinner. No Aaron; she hadn’t seen him since they’d said goodbye earlier. Despite him suggesting having dinner together, it was beginning to feel like he was avoiding her.

  ‘Have you eaten?’ Freya asked.

  ‘I had a main meal at lunch.’

  Freya finished her last mouthful and put her knife and fork on her plate. ‘Let’s go somewhere quieter then.’

  The fire pit was unlit but three staff were sitting around it chatting, so Freya and Drew walked on across the beach to the far side where a cluster of bushes and trees met the ocean, neatly separating the staff beach from the rest of the island. They sat with their backs against the curved trunk of a palm tree which drooped right on to the sand. The ocean gently slid back and forth only a short distance from their feet.

  ‘So...’ Drew said, hugging her knees to her chest.

  Freya stretched out her legs and wiggled her toes in the sand, watching the grains shower over her dusky-pink painted toenails. ‘So his mum’s a bit of a dragon. Maybe that’s unfair, she’s the perfect host to the guests who were staying there and looked after us really well – her food is out of this world, but I got the feeling she wasn’t keen on Aaron bringing me back. She gave us separate rooms.’

  ‘You’re kidding me. I thought this would be your opportunity for a romantic night. Arse. So you didn’t sleep with him?’

  ‘Oh, I did.’

  Drew squealed and nudged Freya’s arm.

  ‘But we didn’t spend the night together. He had to climb into my room through the window so his mum wouldn’t hear. We had sex and he crept out again.’

  ‘That’s kinda hot though. What am I missing? You don’t sound happy. I mean you and Aaron are like totally meant to be. It’s obvious from the beginning that you fancied each other, that you get on. He’s hot as hell. You’re a total babe and one lucky lady...’

  ‘I was happy. It was a... I had a really good time. I didn’t want him to go. I wanted to wake up with him in the morning, but anyway that wasn’t meant to be...’ The water lapping the sand was mesmerising and had a calming effect as she talked and tried to make sense of the last couple of days.

  ‘So what’s bothering you?’ Drew asked.

  ‘Did you know he’s got a kid?’

  ‘He’s got a what?’

  ‘That was exactly my reaction. He has a two-year-old son. And an ex-fiancée. And a whole family who thinks he’s abandoned them. It was no wonder his mum wasn’t thrilled about me being there with him.’

  ‘Why didn’t he tell you?’

  ‘I don’t know, but he didn’t expect to see them, like I said, his mum was a little on the scary side. She arranged a lunch with everyone without telling him they’d be there.’

  Drew’s eyes narrowed. ‘So she tricked him?’

  ‘Sort of. And I ended up in the middle of this strained domestic situation. And it was made worse because of being with him the night before. It had been so bloody perfect.’ Freya sighed and stared at the darkening sky and the moon reflecting on the still ocean. ‘It feels like I read him completely wrong. Having a child is such a big part of someone’s life that it worries me he held that sort of information back.’

  ‘I wonder if anyone else knows? He’s never talked about having a son, not to my knowledge anyway, but then again, I’ve not been here as long as him. I wonder why he’s never said anything?’

  It didn’t feel like her place to say it was because he didn’t think the child was his. She didn’t want to spread any further gossip about him or his reasons for staying quiet. It was a conversation they needed to have at some point, a proper talk about everything that had happened today, and last night. What were they to each other? Just friends? Friends with benefits? Boyfriend and girlfriend? Although how that would work on an island where it would be nearly impossible to be intimate with each other, she had no idea.

  ~

  With the return to the routine of island life, the week raced by. Freya slotted back with ease into working at the bookshop. She liked being busy and with the frequent turnover of guests, there was always someone to chat to about books, new guests wanting the barefoot bookshop experience, to sit out on the deck in one of the comfy seats with a new book, a chilled drink and the view through trees to the beach and ocean. She even got to host her first evening event since the launch – a cocktail party themed around Ian Fleming’s James Bond classic, Casino Royale. With martinis served by waiters in tuxes, Bond themes from over the years as the soundtrack and Zander making an appearance looking as suave as 007 himself, Freya captured everyone’s attention with a reading from the book to set the scene. The evening drew to a close and Zander insisted she t
reat herself to a martini to celebrate its success. She couldn’t quite believe this was her job and where she worked. She felt beyond lucky.

  Whether it was because he’d been trying to avoid her or their paths just didn’t cross, she didn’t see Aaron until the end of the following weekend when he joined her for dinner after work.

  ‘Take a walk with me,’ he said after they’d cleared away their plates.

  Drew had just sat down to eat and she caught Freya’s eye as they walked past. She raised an eyebrow and crossed her fingers. That smallest of gestures meant the world to Freya. It was a real comfort to know she had a friend she could talk to who was rooting for her. A new friendship that meant more to her than she’d anticipated.

  Aaron didn’t say a word until they’d left the staff village behind and turned on to the main path.

  ‘I’m sorry again about everything.’ It was an apology but his voice was laced with anger. Tension seemed to bristle off him.

  ‘Have you been avoiding me on purpose?’

  ‘No, of course not.’

  ‘Okay, it kinda felt like it though.’

  Aaron stopped in his tracks and turned to her. ‘Well maybe a bit. I didn’t go out of my way to avoid you, but I didn’t exactly seek you out either.’

  ‘You realise how it looks to me? We had sex; I found out stuff you didn’t want me to know; then you ghost me.’

  He took her hand. ‘I meant it when I said I’m sorry.’ His voice softened. ‘It always messes me up when I see them. I don’t handle it well. I didn’t handle any of it well, but I didn’t mean for you to be dragged into all of that... My sister, my mum, they can be overbearing at times.’

  ‘I get that, but you should have been honest with me, particularly when you were the one who wanted me to come to your home and meet your mum.’

  They carried on walking and naturally turned off the path towards the bookshop. The sky was darkening and through the trees Freya could see the wash of sunset, red and pinks flooding the sky as they merged with the ocean.