Marriage For One

by Maise, Ella

  “My mother is a psychologist, and my father is an investment banker.”

  “No siblings, right?”

  “No siblings.”

  “Why did you want to be a lawyer?”

  I thought about it and realized I didn’t have a straight answer. “I don’t know. It was always something I found intriguing. Lydia, my mom—her dad was a criminal lawyer and I used to think the world of him, so it felt natural to go into law. Plus, I’m good at it.”

  “You call your mom by her first name?”

  “Yes. She preferred that, I think, after a certain age.”

  “You didn’t want to go into criminal law like your grandfather?”

  “I considered it for a time, but turns out it’s not my thing.”

  “Is your grandfather still alive?”

  “Unfortunately, no. He passed away when I was thirteen.”

  “Oh, I’m sorry, Jack. You’re not so close with your family, then?”

  “No. Like I said, we grew apart.”

  A few minutes passed in silence.

  “How much more?” Rose asked.

  “Just a little. You’re doing great.”

  She snorted, and when more liquid came rushing down, her grip on me tightened. “You have no idea how weird this feels.”

  “I can imagine.”

  Another twenty minutes passed much the same way. With each passing minute after the one-hour mark, she started to get paler.

  “How are you doing?” I asked, my voice coming out gruffer than I wanted.

  “Not so good. I feel nauseous and I’m starting to get a headache.”

  “That’s normal. You’ve been hanging upside down for an hour now. Do you want to take another break?”

  As an answer, she pushed her head up, and I had to let go of her neck so she could rest it on the back of the couch.

  I studied the cup as she took a few deep breaths. “Another ten minutes or so and you’ll be done.”

  Opening her eyes, she also examined the cup, which was almost three inches full. “When do you think they’ll be able to tell?”

  I frowned at her. “Didn’t you hear what the doctor said?” When she gave me a blank stare, I continued. “He’ll rush it for us. Thankfully they can do the test here so we’ll come back tomorrow and learn what’s going on.”

  Sniffing, she nodded and took the cup from me. “Your hand must be going numb. I’ll hold it.”

  “I’m fine. I don’t mind.”

  “I know, but I do.” Closing her eyes, she took another deep breath and bent down again, making sure the cup was aligned correctly.

  When her left hand curled around her knee, without thinking I grabbed it and linked our fingers together. This time, she didn’t look at me, and she didn’t try to pull away either. We just held on.

  I wasn’t sure which one of us was holding on tighter, but we stayed like that for the rest of the ten minutes and then finally the cup was full enough to stop.

  “Okay. Okay, Rose. It’s done.”

  She opened her eyes. “Done?”

  “Yeah.” I took the cup from her and snapped on the cover they had left us. I kissed the back of her hand, but had to let it go as I stood up. “You rest for a few minutes and I’ll get this to the nurse.”

  Wordlessly, she nodded and leaned back.

  It took me a few minutes to track down the nurse and hand the cup to her. When I got back to the room and gently closed the door, Rose’s eyes opened. “Can we leave, Jack?”

  “I think you should sit for a few more minutes. Here, take a few sips of this.” I handed her the water bottle I’d gotten for her.

  She downed a third of the bottle. “What time is it?” she asked in a rough voice as she was tightening the top back on.

  “It’s one PM.”

  Before I could stop her, she was up on her feet, and almost just as quickly she swayed back and forth. “Whoa.”

  “For fuck’s sake, sit down!” I grumbled as I caught her arms before she could fall. “You’ve been sitting with your head between your legs for longer than an hour. You’re not gonna get up and start running around.” I tried to soften my rebuke. “Take it easy for a second. For me at least.”

  She just kept her grip on my forearms and, as always, ignored what I’d just said. We had reached for each other at the same time. “I need to get back. I don’t want to keep Owen longer than necessary.”

  “I know, and you will, but right now you need to sit your ass down and get well before you attempt to work for the rest of the day.” As much as I admired how hard she’d worked to get that place up and running, this was not the time for her to run around and get herself even more sick.

  She looked up at me and nodded. That usual light, spark—call it whatever you want—was gone from her eyes. She looked scared and tired, and that pissed me off even more.

  I helped her sit down and lean back as I took my spot next to her and managed to pry the water bottle out of her hands.

  “I was going to drink that.”

  “You’ll have it after you’ve rested enough that you can stay up on your own two feet and hold a water bottle at the same time.”

  That earned me a sideways glance that I ignored. I was hoping for her to snap back at me like she always did. That was why I always provoked her, because I loved seeing that heat in her eyes, but she didn’t respond, and for her, even that side eye had been pretty weak.

  As she was resting with her eyes closed, I leaned back too, my shoulder brushing hers. I ran a hand up and down my face, my stubble pricking my hand, having grown longer than what I was used to. Now, we’d have to wait twenty-four hours. It didn’t sound like much, but I didn’t know how I was even going to make it through the day yet.

  Rose leaned to her left and hesitantly rested her head somewhere between my shoulder and chest. My body froze for a quick heartbeat. When it looked like she was settled, I gently pulled my arm away so she could get more comfortable and rested it on the back of the couch.

  “How do I look, Jack?” she asked.

  I couldn’t see her or her eyes, so I kept my gaze straight ahead on the white wall with the red poster.

  “Like death warmed over,” I said.

  I could hear the smile in her voice when she responded a few seconds later. “I can always count on you for compliments, can’t I?”

  “That’s why I’m here, isn’t it?”

  I wasn’t clear on how long we sat there like that, me breathing in her scent, but after a few minutes passed, my dick started stirring in my pants. It wasn’t the first time it had happened around her and I was sure it wouldn’t be the last either, but the timing was wrong, as it always was when it came to her. I didn’t know if her eyes were open or not, but to be safe, I rested my left arm across my lap in the hopes of hiding the rapidly growing hardness I knew was noticeable through my pants.

  When her hand came on top of mine, adding more weight to what was already a painful situation for me, I groaned and closed my eyes. I was aware of every inch of her that was pressing against my body, and I couldn’t fucking do anything in that room.

  She turned my watch enough so she could see the time then started playing with my wedding ring, just like I’d played with hers plenty of times.

  “You never took it off,” Rose whispered.

  I closed my eyes and tried my best to ignore what I was feeling. No, I never took it off. Didn’t want to take it off.

  “I’m feeling a little better. We should leave,” she said after a few minutes.

  When she was around, I felt like I had no control over myself. So, leaving worked just fine for me—if she really felt fine, that is. “Are you sure?” I felt her head move up and down on my chest in a nod, because her rubbing her face and scent all over me was exactly what I needed so I could think about nothing but her when I was back at the office. “I’ll drop you at Around the Corner then I need to go to the office.”

  “Jack?”

  “Hmm.” Finally, she li
fted her head and looked up at me. With her warmth gone, I felt colder. Swallowing the lump in my throat, I gave myself permission to touch her, in the name of helping her. I pushed back her hair that would not stay in place behind her ear. “Listening.”

  “This wasn’t the deal.”

  My forehead creased. “What deal?”

  “Our marriage deal,” she said slowly.

  Right. My brilliant idea. “What about it?”

  “I’m aware that this isn’t what you signed up for. Let’s not fool ourselves—this is probably what they think it is. Two doctors, one of them a fancy ENT specialist, think this is most likely CSF, so I don’t know how or when I’ll be able to accompany you to your work events and dinners, but at least if the coffee shop tanks you’ll get the property faster and you won’t have to do the free rent—”

  “Let’s not worry about that now. I can get away with not attending by saying my wife is having health issues, and we’ll pick it up from where we left off once you get better.” I didn’t plan on going to any dinners, but she didn’t need to know that.

  She looked away from me. “Okay. I just know I’m breaking the rules, and if there is anything else I can do to make up for it, you can just—”

  I stood up and, with my back to her, quickly rearranged myself to hide my uncomfortable erection. I faced her and met her confused gaze as I offered my hand. She took it after a short pause.

  “We didn’t set any rules, Rose. If necessary, we’ll make them along the way. Let’s just focus on your health for now. I wouldn’t take you anywhere like this even if you wanted me to.”

  She got up with my help then stared at me with her piercing eyes, a smile breaking out on her face, which didn’t help what I had going on in my pants at all. I frowned harder.

  “I think you’re nothing but bluster sometimes, and I also think I might have gotten the better end of the deal by marrying you.”

  I arched an eyebrow at her as I opened the door to the hallway.

  “Come on, Jack Hawthorne, help me end my day with a high. Let me count to six. Show me that smile. You can do it—I know you can. It’s in you.”

  I couldn’t have held back my laughter even if I’d tried. Then she just kept staring up at me as we started walking. She had this crooked but beautiful and expectant smile on her face as she tried to keep up with my steps. That was what I’d wanted from day one, wasn’t it? To be on the receiving end of that smile?

  I would fight for her when the time came. I would fight with everything I got. “Stop grinning and walk faster. I can’t wait around for you the entire day—you’re making me late to work.”

  When we exited the building, Raymond was waiting for us. It took us almost an hour to get her to work, and when we finally made it, I walked her up to the door.

  “Looks like we have a full house,” she commented, staring inside before turning back to me. “So…I already made you late. You should leave.”

  I had my hands in my pockets, my best protection against reaching for her. I nodded. “Yes. I need to leave.”

  We didn’t move.

  “How are you feeling?” I asked, trying to stay longer.

  She winced and took a deep breath. “Still a little nauseous, to be honest, but better. The headache feels like it’s a permanent thing now.” She gently touched her nose. “This stopped for the time being.”

  “When we know for sure tomorrow, you’ll feel better. Eat something as soon as you get inside.”

  “I’ll do that.”

  When the door opened behind her and two customers walked out, we had to move to the side, to the right of all the flowers she had put up. Her eyes caught on them as well.

  “They look good, don’t they? I wanted people to take photos in front of it and post on social media so it can be its own advertising.”

  “That’s smart.”

  She smiled shyly, and even that looked beautiful on her. She hugged her coat tighter to herself. “It’s going to snow soon. It’s getting colder. I want to change out the roses for a winter theme with big beautiful wreaths on every window, and something for the entrance too. It would look gorgeous for winter and Christmas, but if I end up having surgery—”

  “There are easier ways to ask for my help. You don’t have to resort to histrionics.”

  She chuckled, and finally some warmth returned to her eyes.

  “Okay. Will you help me? I’d like to do it with you again. Maybe that could be like a little tradition too. Not for show, for us.”

  “I will.”

  I looked over her shoulder and saw her two employees watching us with concerned faces. They were probably anxious to hear what had happened.

  I gestured inside with my head. “Sally and your other employee are watching us.”

  “Owen. His name is Owen.”

  As if I didn’t already know.

  She looked back and sent them a quick wave with a smile.

  “So you have to work from your office today, huh?”

  Did she want me to stay? If she asked, I would.

  I checked my watch. “I rescheduled yesterday’s meetings for today, so I need to get back to them.”

  “Oh, okay. Yeah. Then I shouldn’t keep you.”

  I wanted her to keep me forever.

  She pulled her hands out of her grey coat’s pockets and took a step forward. Placing one of her hands on my shoulder, she reached up and pressed a kiss on my cheek. “Thank you for today. It means the world to me,” she whispered into my ear.

  “I didn’t do anything.”

  My control, already frayed as it was, could handle neither her sweet kiss nor the whisper. I wrapped my arm around her waist and held her against my body before she could back away.

  Her wide eyes were staring straight into mine while she was still holding on to my shoulder, so I kissed her like that. As I held her waist tightly, I parted her lips with my tongue and kissed her until she slowly relaxed in my arms letting me have her. When I tilted my head and sucked her tongue, a small gasp escaped her and she closed her eyes, pressing her body into mine even more. Then her tongue slid against mine and she turned eager. As the rush of pleasure started to get too intense for an outdoor kiss as people walked by us, I had to slow it the hell down, but even with that, I took my time and kissed her swollen lips a few more times, just for myself, just little pecks, just to hold me over until the next time I could get away with tasting her.

  When her eyes opened lazily, I explained, “Your employees—”

  “Are watching,” she interrupted, a little out of breath and flushed. “I guessed as much. Good kiss. You’re getting better and better. Practice seems to be working. No sighting of a turtle, but was it maybe a little bit because you wanted to kiss me too?”

  I chuckled, and her eyes dropped to my lips.

  “Yes, it wasn’t just for your employees,” I admitted, leaving it at that.

  It was only because I wanted to kiss her. The only thing I had been about to say was a reminder that she had people waiting.

  “Six.” It was just a soft whisper, but it was more than enough to stir my dick even further after our short-lived kiss.

  “Go inside, Rose. Try to sit down for a while before you jump back into everything.”

  Nodding, she turned away.

  “Don’t work too much,” I added.

  “I’ll talk to you later?” She opened the door halfway and looked back at me.

  “Yes.”

  Her smile was another favorite of mine, sweet and happy. “Okay then.”

  When I came back to Around the Corner two hours after dropping her off, the smile she gave me, the one that made her eyes sparkle in surprise and happiness—it became another favorite as I guided my client to one of the corner tables and had my meeting, feeling Rose’s eyes on me the entire time.

  I hadn’t been able to stay away after all.

  * * *

  The next day we were sitting at the ENT’s office again as he gave us more information
about Rose’s sickness. He said everything the other doctor had said to Rose before, and whenever I cast a quick glance her way where she was sitting next to me, her eyes were glazed over. I didn’t know how much of it she actually heard. Her hands were grasping the arms of the chair in a white-knuckled grip, so I didn’t think my touch would be welcome. Instead, I asked every single question that came to my mind about her upcoming unavoidable surgery.

  “After we see the results of your MRI and the CT scan, we’ll schedule your surgery.”

  Rose cleared her throat and interrupted the doctor. “I’m sorry for interrupting you, but I’m claustrophobic—is there any way we can avoid the MRI scans if we already know from the samples that this is a CSF leak and I’m gonna have surgery anyway?”

  “I’m afraid not, Mrs. Hawthorne. Since you didn’t have a head trauma or any other injuries that could cause a CSF leak, we need the MRI to see if…” The doctor’s eyes flicked to me and then back to Rose again. “We need to see if there are any tumors that would create pressure on the membrane and ultimately cause the leak. We’ll also need to see where exactly the leak is. We need to know everything before we can go in.”

  My body tightened, my anger boiling over. A brain tumor?

  Rose crossed her arms against her chest. “Can I have an open MRI? Is that possible?”

  “I’m afraid the specific scan we need, the open MRIs can’t take.”

  “Okay, I understand.”

  “I’ll see you tomorrow and we’ll have a better game plan on what the next step will be.”

  Much to Rose’s and my horror, they managed to squeeze her in for the MRI and the CT scan as soon as we were out of the doctor’s office. We took the elevator down to get to the radiology department in complete silence. I didn’t need to ask her if she was okay; I already knew she wasn’t. I wasn’t either, but I still felt the need to hear her say something…anything. The doors opened and we got off after an older couple holding hands.

  “Rose—”

  Her eyes slid my way and then she quickly looked down. “Brain tumor sounds fun, huh? That was something I hadn’t thought of. Oh, there’s radiology.”

  She didn’t even give me a chance to say anything, and in a few minutes she was guided into a small room where the radiologist, a young girl with round glasses and an easy smile, told her to take off her shoes, bra, jewelry, and belt along with any metal objects and place them in the secure locker. When she came out after a few minutes, she looked paler than she had when she’d gone in. Her hair was down in soft waves around her, the hair tie that had been holding it up gone.