Under an Alaskan Sky

by Jennifer Snow

  He finally wore the old man down and the bar became his first real job. With his dart tournament winnings, he bought a small tent, sleeping bag, water cooler and stove and he learned to survive any weather in the Wild River outback, showering at the community’s rec center after a morning workout. His membership fee there was worth the cost for a place to get cleaned up and also meet some of the other guys around town.

  Everyone knew he was too young to be on his own, but they also must have seen his strength and determination. He wasn’t causing any trouble, so they left him alone to make his own way.

  And he did. Wild River became his permanent home. He made great friends and connections within the community. And for eight years, things were going better than he could have ever expected. He saved enough for a down payment on a condo and lived modestly, but by his own means, his own hard work... Buying the bar from Mr. O’Neilly had given him confidence in his future. During those days, he often wondered if his parents would be proud of the way he’d turned out.

  Then he realized the only pride he needed was the pride he felt for himself and what he’d been able to accomplish.

  He’d made his way before. He’d made a life for himself when all odds were stacked against him. He had to believe he’d be okay now.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  CASSIE COULD BARELY keep her eyes open as she parked her van in front of SnowTrek Tours three days later and climbed out.

  Three days. Felt like a lifetime.

  She went around to the back, opened the doors, and started unloading her camping gear as her newest guide, Mike, exited the store to help her.

  His eyes watered and he wrinkled his nose. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you stink,” he said, taking the sleeping bag from her.

  “That’s what three days in the woods will do to a person.” The campsite shower facilities hadn’t been operational. Something they’d conveniently forgotten to mention when Cassie had booked the site for the couples’ therapy retreat.

  Funnily enough, none of the couples had cared about the lack of hygiene options. Not enough to prevent them from having sex in their individual teepees the night before. Apparently, their unplugging to reconnect experiment had worked.

  Unfortunately, Cassie had only been reminded of the sex she wasn’t having. And the conversations she needed to have with Tank. Mike had texted to let her know that Tank had stopped by SnowTrek to see her and he’d let him know she was out with the retreat. Shortly after, she’d received Tank’s customary stay safe out there, don’t make me have to come save your ass text, which had both made her smile and broken her heart at the same time. Could they really just act normally around one another now? After the kiss that had changed everything? For her at least. She’d waited so long for that kiss. And it had delivered. Tank had to have felt the connection between them explode in the best possible way, as well.

  Could they go back to being just friends while he figured everything out? Had he already figured things out with Montana while she’d been away?

  Trying to stay focused on keeping a tour group alive when her mind and heart were back here in town, wondering what the hell was going on with Tank and his ex, was near impossible.

  In her imagination she envisioned the worst case scenario—that the two had reconciled. Images of the two of them together had plagued her dreams for the last two nights, and combined with the noises from the teepees, sleep had been nonexistent.

  Shutting the van door, she followed Mike inside.

  “So, how was it?” he asked, carrying the sleeping bag into the back storage room.

  “Horrible.”

  He frowned. “Really? Positive reviews are already starting to come in from the retreaters.”

  “I meant for me. The retreat was great for the couples. They certainly reconnected...”

  Cassie had learned a lot too. More than she’d wanted to, really. The couples’ therapist on the retreat had really put things into perspective. Cassie’s lack of setting boundaries in her relationship with Tank hadn’t done either of them any favors over the years. She’d set a precedent of always being there for him and he’d continued to be emotionally unavailable. They’d both accepted things the way they were, and changing the pattern now would be tough.

  Or it would have been tough. Things had changed dramatically in the last forty-eight hours. Now, changing their friendship to something more might never happen at all.

  Cassie yawned as she unpacked her backpack.

  Mike stopped her. “Seriously, boss, you need to shower. I’ll put all of this away.”

  “Okay...okay, I’m going,” she said, leaving the storage room.

  “And don’t forget you have that private VIP event tonight at North Mountain Sports Company,” he called after her.

  Cassie groaned. “Damn! I forgot all about it. I’m exhausted. This is the last thing I want to do tonight.”

  “Go shower and take a nap. You’ll feel much better,” Mike said, pushing her toward the door.

  Trudging upstairs to her apartment, Cassie unlocked the door and went inside. It was dark, quiet and empty. Reed and Erika were puppy-sitting Diva. Normally, Cassie would have left her with Tank and Kaia, but she hadn’t been prepared to drop the dog off three days ago out of fear of seeing a family reunion that would have destroyed her. She still had no idea what Montana’s intentions were, but the woman’s connection with Tank had been arguably stronger than hers—they had a child together and had tried to make a relationship work...or at least that’s how the pieces of the puzzle fell into place in her mind. If Montana was back in Wild River, Cassie was willing to bet there was a strong motivation for it.

  She tossed her keys onto the kitchen counter and stared at the VIP event invite stuck to her fridge with a promotional magnet in the shape of skis.

  She really wasn’t in the headspace for this right now. Kissing Tank had been the first time in months that her thoughts hadn’t been consumed by her company and North Mountain Sports Company. For a brief respite, things hadn’t felt so uncertain. Now she was in danger of losing not only her company but her best friend, the man she loved, as well.

  Going to this event would only make her feel worse. Taking the invite from the fridge, she tossed it into the trash.

  Then retrieved it. She really should go.

  But first a shower and a nap.

  By six thirty, she’d talked herself in and out of going four times. Lying on her bed, one leg in a stocking, her head in hot rollers, she suddenly wished she was a coffee drinker.

  A hot shower had helped alleviate the smell, but the nap had only made her groggier. Her eyes flitted closed...

  The sound of her doorbell made her jump an undeterminable length of time later as her eyes flew open.

  Shit, she’d fallen asleep.

  Pulling off the pantyhose, she grabbed a robe and headed downstairs, opening the door a second later to find Tank.

  He was dressed in a pair of tight-fitting jeans that hugged his thighs and a black crewneck sweater that displayed the toned chest and shoulders she’d been fantasizing about for two nights out in the wilderness, alone in a teepee. Normally, he’d be a sight for sore, exhausted eyes, but right now, with her conflicted state of heart, she hadn’t been ready to see him. Not yet. Especially looking so freaking hot. Her mouth felt like sandpaper and her pulse raced. “Hi.”

  “Welcome back.” His smile was slow...nervous.

  “Um...thanks. What are you doing here?” Have you talked to your ex since the party? Have the two of you reconciled? Have you told her anything about me?

  So many questions and she couldn’t find the courage to ask any of them.

  “I came to pick you up for the VIP party. Did you forget?”

  Cassie sighed. “No. I’ve just decided to go and then not go so many times, I think I was just hoping I’d run out of time while try
ing to decide.” She stepped back to let him in.

  “Well, if you’re not up for it, I can go and do recon for you...”

  Did he sound relieved at the prospect of going alone?

  Still nothing about Montana and anything that may or may not have happened in the last few days. He had to know she was aching for answers. She shook her head, sending one of the hot rollers across the room in the process. “No. I should go. I guess I just wasn’t expecting...” Him to still be available that evening, him to still want to go. He had to have a million other things on his mind right now.

  “You thought I’d bail on you?” he asked.

  Well, yes, actually.

  Tank picked up the hot roller and handed it to her. His fingers lingering on hers a fraction too long. Tingles shot up her arm and radiated through her body... His timing really sucked. She was completely vulnerable in that moment. Barely dressed, after nights of missing him and thinking about him, listening to other couples have sex in neighboring teepees, replaying their passionate kiss in her mind, and now he was standing there looking so incredibly hot with his hair gelled to one side, his beard trimmed just the way she loved it and smelling like cologne...which he never wore.

  “You know I’d never do that,” he said in her silence.

  Why? Because he cared about her or because he’d feel guilty letting her down right now, when he was no doubt going to let her down about other things...more important things.

  She pulled her hand back. “Make yourself comfortable. I’ll be ready in ten minutes,” she said, hurrying back upstairs, to safety. She took a deep breath and stared at her reflection in the mirror.

  He was here. He hadn’t forgotten. He hadn’t stood her up. He wasn’t avoiding her...for better or worse.

  She yanked the rollers out and ran her fingers through the curls. She stuffed her legs into the pantyhose and pulled a simple yet classy black dress over her head. Two-inch heels and a red cardigan completed her outfit and she headed back downstairs.

  “Wow, you look amazing,” Tank said, turning at the sound of her footsteps on the stairs.

  “I wear this exact same thing to every formal event I don’t want to go to,” she said with a tired laugh.

  “And you look amazing each time. I should have told you that before.” His expression was pained. His words suggesting it was already over between them. He cleared his throat. “Cassie...”

  For the first time ever, she wasn’t ready to talk, to know where his head and heart were, to know that once again she was nothing more than his best friend. “We should get going,” she interrupted.

  And as usual, Tank looked relieved to avoid the conversation. “After you,” he said, opening the door for her.

  * * *

  NOT UNTIL HE was standing right beside her did it fully hit him how much he’d missed seeing Cassie the last few days. Holding himself back from a relationship with her over the years, he’d been successful in keeping his emotions in check, his feelings pushed way down, knowing he couldn’t act on them. Now that he’d kissed her, his heart and mind had been in constant conflict since the party.

  He always worried about her when she was out on adventure tours, but they usually texted constantly. This time had been different. Her brief reply of thanks to his usual text may as well have said fuck off and he couldn’t blame her.

  He’d almost lost his nerve on the drive to her condo that evening. He knew she was upset and she was waiting for answers, deserved answers...but right now he didn’t have any, and being there with her, for her, that evening was as close as he could get to trying to make it up to her, to showing her that he was still here...no matter what happened with Montana.

  He’d yet to talk to his ex. True to her word, Montana was giving him time and space to process, but he knew that reprieve was short-lived.

  He parked his truck in the lot of North Mountain Sports Company and turned to Cassie. “Ready?”

  “No, but let’s go before I change my mind,” she said, opening the door and climbing out.

  Entering the main showroom of North Mountain Sports Company was definitely an experience. The three-story, open concept building boasted a six-thousand-square-foot sales floor, a room full of virtual reality experiences and a floor of sales and booking offices for their real outdoor adventures. Unlike most businesses in Wild River, this one screamed high-end, upscale luxury. Even the mannequins were the full body ones complete with heads featuring makeup or five o’clock stubble.

  And Cassie looked devastated, taking it all in.

  “It’s actually not that great,” he said.

  “Nice try,” she said, looking around at the expansive space that housed all of the top-end suppliers. “Look at those mannequins! Jesus—they look like real people.”

  “I think they’re creepy.”

  “Compared to the headless ones?” Cassie shook her head. “How on earth am I supposed to compete with this?”

  Unfortunately, he had no idea. Luckily, he knew she wasn’t expecting an answer. He’d prefer her no-frills, no-nonsense company any day, but North Mountain Sports Company would be new and shiny and it cast a huge shadow.

  “Hey...welcome! You’re The Drunk Tank owner, right?” Mr. Hartwell said, approaching them with a tray of champagne.

  Odd that he was serving at his own event. “Yes, hi again...”

  The store owner/billionaire/server for the evening turned to Cassie. “And owner of SnowTrek Tours, Cassie Reynolds.”

  “Hello Mr. Hartwell.” Cassie offered a polite smile. “This place is incredible.”

  “Please call me Miller.” He nodded, scanning his store. “We’re very proud of it. Have you taken a tour yet?”

  “No, we just arrived.”

  “Perfect! Let me escort you two throughout the building.”

  Cassie’s eyes widened. “Oh no, that’s okay. You have so many guests here...”

  It was true. There were a lot of familiar faces in the room. Even those originally opposed to the town allowing the big chain store to open. “Yeah, we can look around on our own,” Tank said, sensing Cassie’s intense unease. And now he was only partially to blame for it.

  “Nonsense. Follow me,” Miller said, setting the tray of champagne glasses on a nearby table. “Would you both like to grab some food first?” He gestured toward an hors d’oeuvres table on the right and a dessert table on the left.

  “No, thank you. I’m good,” Cassie said. She glanced at Tank, but he shook his head. An act of solidarity only—he was actually starving. Leftover birthday cake the morning after the party was the last thing he remembered eating in days, but they couldn’t eat at the enemy’s table.

  “Okay, well, this is the main showroom. Our brands include all of the best-known names in sports, as well as some local designers...” He gestured to a section of the display room that consisted of all local products from hand-knitted hats and gloves to a line of skincare ointments Tank recognized from the apothecary shop on Main Street.

  So the guy was living up to his promise of carrying these items and helping other business owners. Though Tank suspected it was all for show and once the items weren’t top sellers—the markup he noticed on the price tags would send customers directly to the source—they would disappear from the shelves at North Mountain Sports Company.

  Unfortunately, beside him, Cassie didn’t seem to have the same train of thought. “I wish I had thought of that,” she whispered as they moved along.

  “In here, we have our virtual reality experiences.” Miller handed them both a set of glasses as they entered the room filled with machines that simulated skiing, snowboarding, tobogganing. Nature backdrop scenes were set up so people could take photos of themselves to post to Instagram... They’d literally thought of everything.

  Most of them were in use and everyone seemed to be enjoying them. He glanced at Cassie. He
gave her credit for trying, but her expression revealed that she’d already mentally packed up her office and permanently closed up shop.

  He couldn’t let her get discouraged. “These are interesting, but we find most tourists prefer the actual outdoors.” Tank placed his glasses back in the basket.

  Miller laughed. “Most do—sure. We just like to be able to offer something for those who prefer something less cold, with less exertion...less risk,” he said, staring pointedly at Cassie. “But you both are most definitely the outdoorsy type, so let’s head upstairs to the offices...”

  Did they have a choice? He wasn’t one to be rude, but the minute they’d appeased Mr. Hartwell, he was getting Cassie out of here. She looked more defeated every second they were inside the building. He hated that his actions had hurt her a few days ago, and he planned to do everything in his power to make it up to her, but this stranger making her feel shitty wasn’t acceptable.

  They rode the escalator in silence and he quickly squeezed her hand...just a friendly gesture. But she surprised him by gripping his right back and holding on tight.

  The gesture both gave him hope and terrified the shit out of him.

  At the top, Mr. Hartwell gestured toward the long line of booking offices. “Each tour guide will have their own office, and we operate on a rotating system...”

  “Aren’t the guides better suited for one type of adventure or another?” Cassie’s crew all boasted specialization in different areas, and she always sent out the best person for each adventure tour.

  “We hire very versatile staff. Only the best make it through a rigorous selection and interview process,” Mr. Hartwell said. “Follow me, there’s just one more thing I’d like to show you.”

  His impressive corner office, no doubt.

  Tank’s prediction wasn’t too far off. The owner of the store did stop outside a beautifully decorated corner office, but it wasn’t his name on the nameplate beside the door. It was Cassie’s.