Rattling Around: The Baxter Boys #5 (The Baxter Boys ~ Rattled)

by Charles, Jane

  “Sounds good.” Ryan pulls himself up and heads up the stairs. I follow him into the dining room and stop short. Besides Ryan and Dylan, Zach, Christian and Alex are at the table.”

  “Where are the girls?” Kelsey and Nina live here too, but they aren’t eating. I don’t think Nina has to work, and Kelsey’s on summer break as a teacher. Plus, Christian spent the night with Bethany.

  “Just us,” Christian says. “You know, to check in.”

  Check in with me, is what he means. Whenever one of us is going through shit, expected or unexpected, we stop what we are doing and usually have a meal and get it talked out. The last time we stopped was when Christian finally told us about the cancer. Today, they stopped for me.

  I could shrug it off and insist I’m fine, but I’m not, and they’d see through the lie. Besides, Ryan already saw the destruction in the basement. “I’m good. Just dealing with the unexpected.”

  “Memories, reminders, your mom?” Dylan asks as I take a seat.

  “All of it. It’s not like I had forgotten or anything but after so long, I wasn’t expecting the anger, almost rage.” That’s exactly what hit me the minute my sledgehammer hit the wall. Pissed as hell at my dad for being a bastard and taking my mom. Rage like I don’t think I’ve even experienced as a kid. “Is it bad that it felt damn good to destroy that wall?”

  The guys look at each other and shrug. “It’s not like it was a person. That would be bad,” Zach finally says.

  “Still that kind of rage, what I felt, can’t be good.”

  “Call your therapist,” Dylan says before he grins. “Don’t wait to talk to him until after you break your hand like I did.”

  About five months ago, Dylan punched a brick wall because he was worried and frustrated when he couldn’t find his sister, Nina. At least I used a sledgehammer to destroy things that were due to be destroyed.

  Not that any of us are violent and pretty much avoid violence at all costs, but it does feel good to let off steam. Maybe that’s why Nina is pretty much a calm person. She plays rugby and soccer and probably gets any aggravation out of her system on the field.

  It’s also probably the reason I enjoy construction. Building and tearing down keeps me busy and physical.

  Maybe I do need to see my therapist. It’s been a long time, and some things are worth revisiting.

  After accepting a big bowl of scrambled eggs from Dylan, I glance up and my eyes lock on the big chalkboard in the dining room. It’s more like chalkboard paint, but it comes in handy when I’m drawing out plans and need to step back and study them. Dylan likes to use a corner for a grocery list. At the very top there are six circles, one of our names in each and lines drawn to the word “Baxter”, which is written at the top of the board. I hadn’t really looked at it since Thanksgiving when Kelsey walked back into our lives. The conversation plays over in my head from that night.

  Kelsey frowns and tilts her head. “Why is that familiar?” she asks.

  “Told you nobody would think a chalkboard in the dining room is odd,” I reminded my roommates.

  “It is odd,” Kelsey counters with a smile. “What’s on it is familiar but I can’t place it.”

  Ryan gets up and writes “Baxter” in the largest circle at the top, then draws an arrow down to six empty circles. We know what they mean, but nobody else would. He then writes one of our names in each one. Beneath each name are three arrows pointing down. “Does that help?”

  She frowns. “Not really.”

  “Old movie, from I think 2000,” offers Christian.

  “I was seven, in foster care and not going to movies,” she reminds us and then her eyebrows form a V over her nose. “You guys are only a year older. You were going to movies?”

  Zach laughs. “No. We actually saw it the first time last Easter.”

  “Zoe caught it on TV, got the DVD and made us all watch it, but she had to leave the room at the end because she couldn’t watch that part again,” Ryan answers.

  Kelsey is just shaking her head, confused.

  “Pay It Forward,” Dylan answers.

  Recognition lights in Kelsey’s eyes, and then she becomes serious, and thoughtful. “I get it. That’s what the kid drew on the board to explain how he was going to make a difference. If you do something for three people and those three people go out and do something for three people each, the cycle will continue.”

  “I’d like to think it was our brilliant idea, doing good deeds and all, but it wasn’t. Hell, we didn’t even get the idea until we saw the movie,” Alex tells her. “But that movie stuck with us and we got to talking afterwards. Where would we be without Baxter?”

  “The streets, doing drugs, dealing drugs,” Zach says.

  “Gangs or prison,” adds Dylan.

  “Dead.”

  “So, we are trying to pay it forward whenever we can.” Alex shrugged.

  Interest lights in her brown eyes. “How?”

  “It’s not that much,” Dylan says as he starts cleaning up the dessert plates from the table.

  “Right now it’s just serving in the soup kitchen,” I offer.

  “It’s better to be on the serving end than the receiving,” Ryan shudders. “Not that the food is bad, but all that goes with it is. So poor that you can’t afford a meal, or maybe not even a place to live. I don’t want to ever visit that life again.”

  “Someday, when we have money,” Alex begins.

  “If we ever have money,” Dylan laughs.

  “We are going to do something big. Really make a difference.”

  I lifted my glass of wine. “To Baxter.”

  “To Baxter,” we echo and toast.

  “Dead?” Christian asks. “What the hell are you thinking about?”

  I blink, then shake my head. “Nothing. Just thinking about giving forward.” Something I really haven’t done. “Serving in a soup kitchen and giving presents at Christmas isn’t enough.” Not nearly enough. Baxter may have put me on the right path but it was Tink who saved me and it was time I started doing more. Someway, somehow, I will make a difference.

  The guys glance at the board. “If you have any ideas, we’d love to hear them,” says Dylan. “I haven’t been able to think of anything I could actually do.”

  That’s just it, I don’t have any clue what else we could be doing but there has to be something.

  “I applied to Kelsey’s school to teach,” Christian announces. “Those kids need music, but if I get the job, I’ll need to figure out where we’re going to get the instruments.”

  “Where does that leave you with playing with the band at Bee Bee’s?” Dylan asks. “Or the recording deal?”

  “I’ll try to do them all,” Christian shrugs. “All I know is that if I get success, more than I’ve had, it will mean little if I didn’t give forward.”

  If he’s applied, then Christian was already thinking about what else he could do before I said anything this morning. I just wish I could think of something bigger and better—to make a real difference.

  Alex pushes back from the table. “Well, let’s get started on the basement.”

  “Don’t you need to be at work?” He owns a tattoo shop and has been there every day, and many nights, since it opened right after the first of the year.

  “I don’t have anything scheduled for the next couple of days and I was going to catch up on paper work. I’d rather work on the basement.”

  “Let’s do it.” Dylan starts stacking the dirty dishes as everyone gets up, taking stuff into the kitchen and piles them on the counter next to the sink before heading downstairs.

  “Dishes?”

  “Can wait.”

  “Since when?” I call as I follow them down. Dylan hates it when just a spoon or a coffee cup is left in the sink.

  “Some things are more important,” he reminds me.

  Damn, they must really be worried about me if Dylan is going to let dishes set. I’ll have to convince them that I really am okay.


  Kaden is dressed in jeans, red sneakers and his favorite Captain America t-shirt. I know I should make him dress nice for court, but it’s more important that he be comfortable and in Kaden’s mind, Captain America is the best super hero there’s ever been. He and Uncle Tink talked about super heroes last night, about what makes them heroes, and that even Super Heroes get scared but they still do the right thing. It’s all about courage.

  My brother grasps my hand as we step into the courthouse and is reluctant to let it go when he has to go through the metal detectors. He hurries and waits not so patiently for me to go through. Once I’m by his side, he grabs my hand again and we wait for Uncle Tink and the other guys, which takes twice as long with their belts and a few have chains on their wallets. They’re small, the chains, but still set off the sensitive sensors.

  Once everyone is through, and we’ve got six guys with us today, we head to the elevator. The bikers surround us and all I can see is the back of Uncle Tink. No matter which way I look, I see a big biker. They are shielding and protecting Kaden, not me, but since my brother won’t let go of my hand, I’m shielded to. They did the same thing yesterday and will keep us surrounded until Kaden finally takes the stand.

  We follow without sight of where we are headed until the guys start to slow and then I hear the ding of the elevator.

  I glance down at Kaden. He’s staring straight ahead, his blue eyes wide and I pray he finds his courage and can testify to what happened the night our mother died. I squeeze his hand and he looks at me and the fear in those blue depths squeezes my heart. “You can do this,” I whisper.

  “I know,” he responds. “I have to.”

  “I’ll be right there in the courtroom with you. All of us will be.”

  He gives a nod then looks forward as the guys move into the elevator.

  As the doors close behind us, I blow out a breath, wishing this day was behind us so that we could begin to move forward. Each day is one hurdle. Today’s hurdle is Kaden’s testimony. The next few days will be waiting for the trial to be over, but at least Kaden won’t have to come back to the courthouse. I’ll be here every day. I want to know what is said, no matter how difficult it is to hear. I need to watch the jury too, to make sure they are reacting the way they should.

  All I can hope is that the current jurors will see through my step-dad and his story of an accident for the fabrication it is.

  The numbers flash as the elevator climbs until it stops on our floor. Two bikers hold the doors so we can all get out before they close on us. My pulse picks up with each step we take as the guys lead us to the benches we occupied the day before. Kaden slides into his spot and the guys stand in front of him. I remain standing because I know that I’ll be sitting a lot once we go into the courtroom.

  At the click of heels on the tiled floor I turn to find Mrs. Croft, the prosecuting attorney, approach. She looks grim and my stomach tightens. The trial starts today and she should look determined and confident, not concerned.

  Beside her is an officer of the court and he is carrying folded papers.

  He stops before us.

  “Noelle Dubois?”

  “That’s me.”

  He hands me a folded document. “You’ve been served.”

  He then names each of the bikers that are with us, including Uncle Tink, and others who aren’t.

  “What’s going on?” I ask Mrs. Croft without looking at the document.

  “A subpoena to testify.”

  “For the defense?” There is no way that Gary wants me to actually testify. He can’t want to hear what I have to say. “Why?”

  The prosecutor blows out a breath. “To keep you out of the courtroom.”

  “What?” Surely she doesn’t mean that I have to stay out here while Kaden is in there testifying.

  “Shit!” one of the bikers said.

  Another biker shoots him a look then motions to Kaden with his eyes.

  My brother has heard much worse from me, but I don’t tell him that.

  “They’ve tried this before,” Uncle Tink explains. “Usually we get served before we show up at the courthouse.”

  “So what happens then? You don’t show?”

  “The guys who formed the bond with the kid still show up, but we bring in other guys who haven’t been summoned.”

  Panic is rising, my throat closing, but I can’t let Kaden know because I don’t need him any more scared than he is. “Can you get someone now?”

  “Court starts in about fifteen minutes. The bikers work. With notice, their bosses are good with giving them the time off but not on this short of notice.”

  I pull the prosecutor off to the side. “So, are you telling me that none of us can be in there?”

  “Not until after you’ve testified.”

  “Can we testify before Kaden?” Maybe this isn’t as bad as I’m afraid.

  “If only that were possible,” Mrs. Croft sighs. “We have to put our case on first, which includes the police officer, medical examiner and Kaden. They won’t call their witnesses until after we rest.”

  The bikers all have their phones out tapping away on the keys. It’s almost frantic, like a bunch of teenage girls who just learned the latest juicy gossip. But, this isn’t gossip. They are trying to find bikers to replace them. At least that is what I assume, and I pray that Kaden accepts the new guys since it took him so long to warm up and trust the ones that are here.

  “It won’t do any good.” Mrs. Croft pulls a sheet of paper from her briefcase. “I got an updated witness list this morning. If I’m not mistaken, every member of your Chapter should have received a subpoena, or will shortly.”

  The bikers stop texting and stare are her as my mouth pops open and my mind reels. “Most of them haven’t even met Kaden.”

  Uncle Tink is shaking his head. “This is even beyond anything we’ve dealt with before. We have a lot of numbers, and each witness needs to be paid a fee.”

  My heart sinks. “Gary has very deep pockets. Lots of zeros in his accounts and investments. Even if it costs a million, he probably wouldn’t notice the money was missing.”

  I sink down on the bench beside Kaden and take his hand. “There’s no chance that they’ll let even one of us in?” I look at the prosecutor, trying not to alarm Kaden or spell out my concern.

  “None. Everyone on the list must remain out of the courtroom until they’ve testified.” Then she takes a step forward. “But, I will drag the day out, as much as I can, and try to buy time. While I’m in there, try to think of someone, anyone, you can call to be in that courtroom.”

  Uncle Tink and I look at each other. “Sean and Zach?” he asks.

  Those are the only two people I can think of that Kaden might be comfortable enough around. And, Sean’s been in Kaden’s shoes. Not that I know the details, but he told me enough that he’d be sympathetic. At least I think they’d help if we called, but maybe they have jobs too and wouldn’t be able to get away.

  “Do you have his number?” I ask.

  “No. You?” Tink counters.

  “I didn’t think to get it.”

  “Call Dad. He’s got to have it.”

  Yes! He must. If not Sean’s then at least Zach’s. I grab my phone and call Gramps.

  There is no answer. None!

  I keep trying, but it just rings and rings.

  I know they’re home so why the hell aren’t they answering the phone? “Kaden, did Gramps say anything to you about leaving?”

  “No.”

  “Why isn’t he answering the phone?”

  “It’s unplugged.”

  I take the phone away from my ear. “What?”

  “Grams makes random phone calls so he finally unplugged it.”

  “Random phone calls?”

  “She just dials and talks to people.”

  Hanging up, I shove the phone back in my pocket. First hurdle after the trial is to figure out what do with my grandparents. Gramps needs surgery and Grams, well, she nee
ds something that I’ll have to deal with later.

  “Kaden, we need to have a talk.” Uncle Tink holds out his hand. “Walk with me.”

  My brother takes his hand and my heart breaks as I watch them walk away to a far bench in the corner. The two sit. I can’t hear what Uncle Tink is saying, but the color drains from Kaden’s face, then he looks panicked, but Uncle Tink keeps talking and by the time he’s finished, Kaden lifts his chin and with a determined look gives a nod.

  Thank God for Uncle Tink because if it was just me, I’d be lost and probably screw everything up.

  The two come back over and there is determination in my brother’s eyes.

  “I asked him if I should send one of the guys for Sean and Zach, but he’s determined to do this and doesn’t want any of us to leave.”

  As much as I want to get someone here who can sit in the courtroom, I’ve got to trust in my brother. If he says he’s got this, then I need to believe him.

  6

  The basement is coming along quicker than I anticipated. If this keeps up, the bulk of the heavy building and installation might get done before I go back to work next week. The only reason so much got done was because all of the guys were down here helping. The six of us haven’t worked on a project, all of us at once, since we cleaned out and painted the attic before Kelsey moved in. The attic was a really quick job. We didn’t have to hurry today and just got the work done, joked and talked.

  The guys stayed because they were worried about me, but really, I’m fine. So, I took a sledgehammer to a few walls that needed to go, it’s not like I’m going to go on a rampage and destroy the house. But, I’m also glad that I wasn’t down here alone, stuck in my own head, and worried about Kaden and remembering my mom from that night.

  “A good day,” Zach says as he comes back down with six beers.

  We each take one and sit around what will eventually be a living room.

  “What’s Bethany say to you teaching, the recording deal and playing at Bee Bee’s?” I ask Christian with a half grin. “She’s going to have a baby and probably wants you around at least some of the time.”