Adventure Bike Club and the Tire Giant

by Brian Bakos

itching for a chance to use it again.

  Meanwhile, the dynamo is picking up speed and making more noise. The robots recover their senses and fly off like a flock of nervous pigeons checking for damage.

  “I hope that explosion didn’t wreck anything,” I say. “It would be too bad if the aliens got stuck here.”

  “Not necessarily,” Melissa says, looking straight at Kintz One. “We’d just have to make the proper arrangements is all.”

  The prisoner groans back into consciousness and tries to move. Kintz One jams a knee into his chest to hold him down. Eddie shoves the spike under his chin.

  “Go ahead, Dog Face, give me an excuse to use this!” Eddie snarls.

  The prisoner settles back. Soon we have him tightly wrapped up in tires and inner tubes. The Kintz girls find some thick wire to finish the job. The Basitch guy looks like a half-baked mummy wrapped up the way he is.

  As a finishing touch, Quentin twists an inner tube around the prisoner’s neck and sticks a wrench through it as a tightener.

  “Just in case he needs some persuading,” Quentin says.

  I don’t like all this cruel stuff, but I must harden myself to it. After all, the Basitch guy planned to throw all of us into outer space – not to mention all the mean stuff he did to the Kintz kids.

  The dynamo is spinning a lot faster now, and it can’t be long before it reaches take off speed. The time for us to leave is now.

  “He seems under control,” I say. “We ought to be going, don’t you think?”

  “I’m all for that,” Tommy says. “We’ve been inside this rubber coffin way too long.”

  “Yeah,” Quentin agrees.

  Melissa turns to Kintz One and takes his hands.

  “It would be really nice if you could come with us,” she says, “but I suppose you have to get back to your family ... and your girlfriend.”

  She kisses him on the cheek. Kintz One reddens.

  “You’re embarrassing him,” I say.

  “Good,” Melissa says, “at least he’ll remember me.”

  Kintz One changes the subject in a hurry.

  “You will have to use the emergency hatch, my friends,” he says. “I shall find out how it works.”

  He says something to the prisoner, but gets no reply.

  “Use the persuader,” Eddie says.

  Kintz One wrenches the neck inner tube, and the Basitch man chokes loudly. Despite myself, I feel a bit sorry for him. Of course, I can afford to be now that he’s no longer a threat.

  Eddie does not share the feeling.

  “Twist his rotten head off!” he says.

  The Basitch man’s face turns red, then purple. When Kintz One finally release the pressure, the former guard is more cooperative. A torrent of alien words pours from his mouth.

  “That is much better,” Kintz One says. “I shall open the hatch for you now.”

  “Let me help, okay?” Eddie says.

  “Certainly, Lord Eddie.”

  Kintz One and Eddie move off while the rest of us say our good-byes. The Kintz girls crowd around, hugging us and talking sadly in their musical voices.

  “I’m sorry we didn’t get to know you better,” I say. “I’m really glad we could help each other out, though.”

  “Yeah,” Quentin says. “I wish you could have taught us that flame ball game.”

  We all seem to understand each other, even without the communicator. A warm flood of affection rolls over me, and I almost want to stay behind. The Kintz girls hug me close, like the sisters I don’t have back home.

  Then, off in the darkness, a small oval of light appears.

  “Go now!” Kintz One shouts. “Farewell, my friends!”

  “Hey, what about my bike?” Melissa says.

  “Forget it!” I say.

  I grab Melissa’s arm and take off. But we don’t make any progress. The more we run toward the escape hatch, the farther away it gets, like when I tried to chase after the Kintz girls.

  “This isn’t working out,” Melissa says.

  Then Kintz A grabs my hand. The twins take hold of Tommy and Quentin. We all run like crazy. The emergency hatch gets nearer, but also smaller. It’s starting to shrink closed!

  We jump.

  31. Escape Tumble

  “Farewell! Farewell ...” The Kintz voices drift away behind us.

  We pitch through a dark tunnel for what seems like hours, bouncing off the walls and into each other. Melissa’s hair is in my face, almost smothering me, then somebody’s foot replaces it, then I am tumbling around alone.

  I can’t see a thing! Time is all crazy. Which way is up – what universe am I in?

  I try to cry out. Shouts and screams loop around as if they are coming from a million miles away. Pictures flash through my mind like a fast-forward movie. All the people and things that matter to me zip by – Mom and Dad, Grandpa Searles, school, my Russian grandparents. I see my room back home; it’s beautiful now, like a palace.

  Then, just as it seems I’ll never get away, I am suddenly lying in the wet grass outside. I have no idea how I got here. It’s as if some magician has abracadabra-ed me onto the spot.

  I feel rooted to the earth, my beautiful United States of America, but my head is still spinning around in some other dimension.

  It’s getting late now, and the sky is clearing up. Low sun rays jab through the broken cloud cover. My clothes are all wet from the damp ground, and a picker weed stabs into my back. The discomfort almost feels good because it tells me that I’m part of the real world again.

  “Oh man,” Tommy groans, “I feel like I’ve been tossed through a clothes dryer.”

  I roll off the picker weed. Tommy, Quentin, and Melissa are sprawled around me. They are as dazed as I am, but nobody seems badly hurt. The Tire Giant looms over us nearby, rumbling and whooshing, shooting out sparks. I try to avoid looking at it. Melissa is the first to stand up.

  “Just look at my outfit,” she says. “It’s completely ruined!”

  “What could be worse?” I say.

  The rest of us get back on our feet. I’m a bit unsteady, but not nearly as bad as when the Basitch man zapped us.

  “Where’s Eddie?” Quentin says.

  We all glance around. Not a trace of him.

  “He’s got a real knack for disappearing,” Melissa says.

  “Maybe he landed in the bushes,” Tommy says.

  I run toward the thick greenery.

  “Eddie! Are you okay!” I shout. “Eddie!”

  “Up here, Amanda!”

  I turn back toward the Tire Giant, only it isn’t a tire any longer. It’s disguise is vaporizing, revealing the flying saucer type thing inside. The middle spins at great speed, whipping the air; growing vibrations shake the ground.

  Only the outer part of it is motionless. Eddie’s head pokes out from a hatchway.

  “I’m going with them!” he yells. “It’s got to be more fun than here. Kintz One says I’ll be a hero.”

  “Good luck,” I shout, “give them my love!”

  “Same to you,” Eddie says. “Catch!”

  He tosses out the New York Yankees baseball cap. The wind from the spinning saucer flings it onto the bushes.

  “Give it back to Joey Blanton, okay?” Eddie says. “Tell him to hang in there.”

  “Sure Eddie.” Quentin snatches the cap out of the bushes. “You’ve got my camera. Send us a picture post card.”

  “Have fun riding my bike!” Tommy yells.

  “Thanks!” Eddie tosses something else out. “Here’s a souvenir.”

  The Basitch man’s floppy hat comes wafting down. Tommy leaps up and snags it before it blows into the bushes. With a final wave, Eddie closes the hatch.

  “You know, I’m going to miss him,” Tommy says.

  “Yeah, he was pretty cool,” Quentin says, “once you got past the railroad spike part.”

  “He’s got my English racer,” Melissa says.

  The whole ship
is spinning now, faster and faster. The whine becomes a deafening roar. Then the whole thing simply vanishes. We are alone, staring off into a blank sky. I rub my eyes with both hands.

  Has any of this really happened, or am I just going off my rocker?

  “I wonder how Eddie managed things,” Tommy says. “Didn’t Kintz A tell us they couldn’t carry any more passengers?”

  A bright flash appears high up. It streaks across the sky like a shooting star, then blinks out.

  “I believe that answers your question,” I say. “It looks like they ejected the guard without a parachute.”

  “Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy, if you ask me,” Melissa says.

  Tommy holds up the hat.

  “Maybe he was coming back for this,” he says.

  Two smaller flashes appear in the sky.

  “That must be Old Reliable,” Quentin says. “Good-bye friend!”

  I am overcome with joyfulness and gratitude, so are Tommy and Quentin. We stand together in a group hug, our tears flowing freely. Not even the super macho Quentin shows any embarrassment.

  Only Melissa seems to be in a sour mood.

  “Just when I finally meet an interesting boy, he’s got to take off in a hurry,” she says. “And my poor bike! I’ll never get another one like it.”

  32. The Posse Arrives

  Three policemen emerge from the trees with their guns drawn. Another mean-looking guy in a suit is with them; I think he’s the police chief. A fifth person that I recognize as Mayor Lazar brings up the rear.

  “Looks like we’ve got company,” Tommy says.

  The men look astonished to discover that the tire giant is gone.

  “Check the area over there, men,” the police chief says.

  Two of the cops roam about the spot where the tire had been, as if they expect it to somehow pop into existence again. Another cop and the police chief approach us.

  “What can we do for you?” Tommy asks.

  He’s always so diplomatic.

  “Did you see what happened here?” the police chief barks.

  “Actually, we just got here,” Quentin says. “Isn’t that right, guys?”

  Quentin doesn’t sound very convincing, but we all agree with him. The police chief drills us with a suspicious glower.

  “Maybe you can tell us your story down at the station,” he says.

  “You can’t take us there!” Quentin protests. “My mom would kill me.”

  “Can’t I?” the chief says. “You’re trespassing, for starters, and a town ordinance specifically forbids people to walk along railroad tracks. You did get here along the tracks, didn’t you?”

  “Well, no,” Tommy says. “We just sort of tumbled into this place.”

  While this confrontation is going on, I slip away to Mayor Lazar. He’s standing off to the side trying to look important, despite his muddy, soaked clothing.

  “A little late, aren’t you, Mayor?” I say. “What happened, did your blue diamond take a powder?”

  Lazar gives me a startled look, like he’s been socked in the gut; then he turns a shade paler.

  “What do you know about blue diamonds?” he says.

  “I know plenty,” I say, “and unless you want everybody else to know, you’ll let me and my friends go – no questions asked.”

  Lazar flushes red, then back to pale.

  “Come now,” he says, “this is only a routine investigation.”

  “We want to routine it out of here, right now,” I say.

  Mayor Lazar straightens his soggy jacket, then walks over to the police chief.

  “I’d like a word with you in private, Chief Bascomb,” he says.

  They walk off a short distance to confer. The two policemen checking the area where the tire giant had been come back to guard us so that we don’t run off. The third policeman stands by with a shotgun. Our tax dollars at work.

  After a minute, Lazar looks our way and waves his had irritably, as it to say: “Get out and don’t come back!”

  And so we are free, pushing our way through the shrubbery and into the railroad track wasteland.

  The whole area is wet and dreary, but to me it seems like the middle of paradise.

  Epilog: Demise of the Club

  This was the end of the Adventure Bike Club, seeing as none of us had bikes any more.

  That’s not exactly true. Melissa’s twin brother, Davis, also received an English racer for a birthday present. He didn’t really want it, though, and he gave it to Quentin who was in desperate need of a bike.

  “I never forget a pal!” Quentin said.

  After that, he kept an eye on Davis, elbowing aside any bullies that might try to bother him.

  “How’d you like to get your face rearranged?” Quentin would ask them.

  We’re all still friends, but without our trusty wheels we have to turn to different things for adventure. And that’s a whole other story.

  Editor’s Note:

  If you’re ever on I-94 near Detroit, you can see a real giant tire alongside the road. It was once a ride at the World’s Fair and then became an advertisement. It’s not scary like the tire in this story, but it is pretty cool.

  THE END