The South West Series Box Set
Page 37
“Grockles?!” Beth asked with a laugh.
“Sorry, sorry, the Devon lingo gets to you in the end. Tourists!”
“Well I’ll be one of those tourists, won’t I! But that does sound great… let me check with work, and get back to you, okay?”
“You’re always welcome Beth - say the word, the spare room’s yours.”
Beth felt a flash of guilt - she really ought to visit her sister more, she knew. Whenever they did spend time together it was so great - but they were both busy, and it was easy for weeks or even months to pass by without meeting in person.
“I promise, I’ll come down soon - the beaches are calling to me!”
Chapter 2
The week passed by in a hot blur, with most of her work conversations revolving around the unusually warm and dry weather they were having, and whether there was a maximum temperature the office could be before they had to be sent home (it turned out there wasn’t).
After work on Friday, before even heading up to her flat, she decided it was far too nice to be stuck indoors. She headed out along the river, wandering the well-worn footpath and jumping out of the way for cyclists that beeped their horns every now and again for her to move out of the way, without any real purpose to her meandering.
She watched as a couple sat on a bench, sharing a sandwich and looking out over the river; a young woman sat curled up on the next bench with a well-worn novel, and Beth let her mind wander to the last time she’d read a book. As a kid she’d devoured novels, but of late she couldn’t bring herself to start one, even with plenty of long evenings by herself.
Making a promise to herself to head to a bookshop in the near future, she head for home, making a stop along the way for a nice cold bottle of wine.
***
Saturday evening rolled round just as balmy, and after a day spent lazing around the house and not getting enough housework done, Beth was looking forward to a night on the town with Jasmine. Nights out had definitely become less regular, and she relished the chance to get dressed up, put some make up on and drink a few - or more! - glasses of wine.
They’d arranged to meet at eight, and it was almost ten to by the time Beth stepped into her taxi, wearing a failsafe little black dress and gold heels that caught the sun as much as her blonde hair. She had always been quite petite, and the heels made her feel a little more powerful out in the wide world.
Jasmine was late, as usual, and Beth sat on a bench outside the bar, looking over the river, thinking not about their evening but about her upcoming trip to Devon. Work seemed happy enough for her to take the holiday she was owed in a little over a week’s time - which Beth found depressed her a little. After all, if they didn’t need more notice or time to find someone to cover, how useful could she really be?
Luckily, Jasmine bounced into view, wearing a killer gold dress with heels to match, derailing Beth’s thoughts from their miserable path.
“They’re not going to know what’s hit them!” Jasmine said in way of greeting, glancing over Beth’s outfit. “There better be some fireworks tonight!”
“What about you?!” Beth said with a laugh. “You’re in a relationship, remember?”
“Doesn’t mean I can’t make an effort! I dress like this for me, not for the men who might happen to see me!”
***
Three glasses of wine and two shots later, Beth was not feeling quite so cheerful.
“What am I doing, Jas? With my life?”
“I have no idea. What am I doing with mine?”
“But you’re five years younger than me!” Beth hiccuped as she spoke. “I’m on the path to nowhere.”
“That’s not true! You’ve got a job-”
“That probably wouldn’t replace me if I got hit by a bus tomorrow.”
“And a flat!”
“That’s a mess! And is rented, so they could kick me out any time they like.”
“You’ve got family-”
“Now you’re clutching at straws. They don’t live near, and besides, I need something in my life that’s not my mother or my older sister. They’ve got their own lives!”
Jasmine sat, silenced, looking a little stumped.
Beth groaned, and lay her head on the table - before immediately regretting it when she realised it was slightly sticky. “You know I’m right. No career, no proper home, no serious relationship on the horizon… before you know it, I’ll be five years older and be in exactly the same situation.”
“Would that be awful?” Jas asked, sipping some bright pink cocktail.
“I think it would. I think I need… something.”
“A man.”
“No, not necessarily a man! Something else in my life, other than all this!”
“Charming,” Jas said with a sniff.
“Oh you know what I mean! But at some point your internship will come to an end, and you’ll leave me for some hotshot career, and I’ll still be here, thirty-odd by that point and still alone, and still with no real goal, or passion, or…”
“Something,” Jasmine supplied, not too helpfully.
“Something.”
“Tonight was supposed to be fun!” Jasmine said, prodding her friend in the arm. “Not being drunk and miserable. We were meant to be finding you fireworks!”
“I’m not sure they exist anymore… I can’t remember the last time I felt true fireworks,” Beth replied.
“No. We are not spending the whole evening like this. Just because I can’t hook up with random strangers does not mean the same is true for you. You are not over the hill, Beth - you are twenty-eight years young. Come on, no arguments.”
There definitely were arguments, but Jasmine was deaf to them, and dragged Beth onto the dance floor and into the pathway of a group of blokes who looked to be in their twenties. There was definitely a lack of women in the bar tonight, and the men weren’t going to pass up the chance to dance with them.
Beth threw herself into the rhythm of the music, dancing with Jasmine but fully aware of the cute curly red-head who was dancing closer to her. She gave him a smile, and before she knew it she was dancing with him and Jasmine with one of his friends, without a word even being exchanged. She didn’t particularly want to exchange words, anyway; the beat of the music filled her ears and her heart, and she let her body move, feeling his arm snake around her waist and their movements syncronise.
She felt a freedom in her movements that the sensible part of her knew was thanks to the copious amounts of wine and multiple shots she had drunk, but gave in to it anyway. Before she knew it, her arms were round his neck, curling into that red hair, and his lips were on hers and then…
No fireworks.
He was cute, he was probably younger than she was, and she could feel beneath her arms that he had a body he worked hard for. And yet the spark… it did not ignite. There was no fire inside her, no desire that made her desperate to be closer, to call a cab and go anywhere to be alone. The kiss broke after a few moments and Beth did not try to re-initiate it. In fact, once the song had ended she made her excuses - although she doubted he could hear her over the noise - and disappeared out into the smoking shelter.
She had no interest in smoking, but the cool breeze and relative quiet gave her a chance to regain control of her swirling, drunken mind. She sat on a step, ignoring the other patrons, and let her head hang forwards.
“Are you okay?” a voice that she did not recognise asked, and when she found the energy to raise her head, she saw it was the red-head from the dance floor. She tried not to let her face show her disappointment in the fact that he had followed her… it wasn’t his fault, after all.
“Yeah. Bit warm,” she said.
He sat down on the step next to her, leaving her some space which she was grateful for. In the harsh outdoor lighting, she realised he looked a lot younger.
“Sorry,” he said. “If it was something I did.”
She smiled then, and patted his arm clumsily. “Nothing you did. Hon
est.” She squinted at his slightly blurry face. “How old are you, anyway?” She could have argued that the alcohol was making her bolder, but truth be told she was always fairly direct. Always had been - her mother had always said it was her biggest failing, even though she was fairly sure it was that same mother she’d inherited it from.
“Twenty,” he said, blushing red, and Beth groaned.
“You’re a baby!”
“I’m not!” he said, clearly offended.
“Sorry, sorry, ignore me. I’m a miserable drunk old woman, who just realised she was making out with a- with someone too young for her. Forgive me.”
“You’re not old,” he said, and she smiled at his sweet words. Really, he didn’t seem all bad - just way too young for her, and certainly not a firework starter.
“Thank you for saying that,” she said.
“So we established you’re not old,” he said, with a smile, his cheeks fading back to their normal colour. “And I think drunk is probably a fair assessment, so I won’t argue with that one. But why are you miserable?”
“I’m not sure you’d understand,” she said with a shrug.
“Try me.”
“I’m sure you have better things to do with your time…?”
“Tony,” he interjected.
“Tony. I’m Beth.”
“Nice to meet you,” he said, shaking her hand in a formal way that seemed out of place on the floor of a smoking shelter. “And since you clearly have no interest in making out on the dance floor with me - I’m going to try not to take offence at that - it’ll do my reputation far more good if they think I’m out here with you, so go on - why are you miserable?”
“You’re very confident for a twenty-year-old, aren’t you?”
“Yes,” he said with a grin. “And I’m also drunk. Who knows which is more true. And I probably won’t even remember this in the morning, so you might as well tell me.”
She looked him up and down for a moment, this blurry figure, this cute, young, interesting boy, and thought - what the hell? “My life’s going nowhere,” she said. “I’m stuck. Stuck in a dead-end job, rented flat, no love life to speak of… There’s nothing that excites me. I feel like my life is over before I’ve even hit thirty.”
“Told you you weren’t old,” he said with a crooked smile.
“Go on then, fix all my problems,” she said with a daring look.
“Hey, what do I know, I’m just a student on a night out. But I think the answer’s pretty obvious…”
“It is?”
“If you’re stuck, change something. Move. Get a new job. I would say a new man, but you’ve turned me down so you’re obviously not on the market right now…”
“Cocky as well as cheeky!” she said, but she liked his attitude.
“Seriously, though. You’re too young to feel like you should be in a nursing home already. Find a hobby, or charity work, or a new group of friends - changing one thing might make the world of difference. Or, throw caution to the wind and change everything…”
“Are you my guardian angel?” Beth asked, with a hint of sarcasm dripping through her lips.
“Too good looking for that,” he said.
It was at that moment that Jasmine appeared in the doorway.
“There you are! I thought you’d gone home with someone.”
“She was about to,” Tony said, and Beth elbowed him in the ribs.
“No, she wasn’t. But I am going to go home. You coming?” She glared at Tony, daring him to answer.
He laughed but stayed silent, and Jasmine nodded, eying the young man suspiciously. “Come on then,” she said, offering Beth a hand and helping her to her feet. She wouldn’t like to admit it, but she needed the help up - things were swaying a lot more than they should have been.
“Thanks guardian angel,” she said, sticking her tongue out at him and laughing as she exited the door. “Sorry for the crappy kiss!”
Chapter 3
“Oh I do like to be beside the seaside…” Beth sang to herself, packing her belongings on the morning of her visit to Devon. Change may have been on her mind, but being organised enough to pack before the day wasn’t something that was going to happen anytime soon. The weather looked to be nice, and so she threw in a hodge podge of dresses, shorts and cardis, hoping there would be enough to last her the week. She could generally get away with stealing her sister Lee’s clothes in a pinch, although trousers were definitely a no-go - the difference in their heights made that simply comical.
The drive was peaceful, since she had chosen to go in the middle of the day and before any of the school holidays started, and she enjoyed the thrill of speeding down the motorway, the windows slightly open and the music blaring. It became windier as she headed away from the city, merging onto the A road that had twists and turns and a few sheer drops. It was a journey she knew she should make more often - after all, it was only an hour or so.
The sun dazzled across the hot tarmac, and Beth felt a buzz of joy as she sped away from everything that was getting her down at home. She sang badly to whatever came on the radio, and only got lost twice trying to find the winding driveway up to the little cottage that Lee shared with her fiancé James.
It really was a Christmas-card cottage, Beth thought as she parked - although not now, of course, in the sunlight. But you could imagine it covered in snow, with a robin on the fence and Christmas lights in the windows, at Christmas time. It was an old, red brick building, with a white picket fence and herbs growing in the front garden. The windows had shutters although they were all open, and ivy grew up one of the walls.
“Beth!” Lee shouted from an upstairs window, and Beth shaded her eyes to see her sister bathed in sunlight. “Come in, the front door’s open, I’m just changing Holly, be down in five.”
She dragged her poorly-packed suitcase out of the car and through the front door, taking her shoes off before walking in to the wooden-floored living room. It was all very tidy, she thought, even with a young baby in the house. There were a few toys dotted around, and a half-drunk mug of tea on the coffee table, but other than that everything was in its place. There was a sense of peace around that Beth knew would be broken as soon as her little niece was let loose, and she allowed herself to wallow in it for a few minutes before wandering to check out the photos on the mantelpiece. Some were clearly new; a candid shot of Lee, holding baby Holly at what looked like a few days old; and a family shot of the three of them, James with Holly in a sling, the two adults grinning like fools in front of the crashing waves at the seaside.
A wail announced her sister’s entrance, and Beth turned round to see tall, blonde Lee wearing a black maxi dress, hair thrown up in a bun and a confused looking Holly on her hip.
They hugged, and Beth held her hands out for a baby cuddle.
“Come to Aunty Beth!”
“I’ve been referring to you as Aunty Elizabeth…” Lee said with a smirk, causing her little sister to smack her on the arm. “Hey! You deserve it, you called me Shirley last week.”
“Thank you mother for old fashioned names, eh,” Beth said with a grin, jiggling a slightly unsure Holly up and down on her hip to settle her. “Mummy’s being mean to me,” she confided in the little girl in a loud whisper. “But at least she gave you a sensible name, that you won’t need to shorten.”
Lee flopped onto the sofa. “Who knows, maybe she’ll hate it!”
“James at work?”
“Yeah, he’ll be back in time for dinner.”
“No work for you today?”
“Nope, taken most of the week off to spend with you, little sister! You sounded like things are a bit rubbish…”
“Let’s not talk about that right now…” Beth said with a shrug, passing a now tearful Holly back. “This little lady wants her mummy, not me I’m afraid!”
“It’s just because she hasn’t seen you in a while,” Lee said, taking back the baby who immediately settled in her arms. “She’ll be fine once y
ou’ve been here a couple of days.”
“Let’s hope so! Anyway, that conversation can only happen over wine, I’m afraid, so let’s wait until a bottle is cracked open before I moan to you about my life.”
“Deal. So, what shall we do while you’re down? I presume you want to go to the seaside?”
“Definitely. And Dartmouth, always.”
“Fish and chips by the water - always good when you’re in Devon!”
Beth stretched out on the sofa. “It feels good to get away from everything,” she said. “This house feels like it’s so far away from everything else in the world.”