How to Not Fall for the Guy Next Door: A Sweet and Humorous Romance

by Easton, Meg

  “Because I, the big sister, was looking to shield you from the horror.”

  Chloe shot Addison a look, then turned to Ian. “All she told me was that we couldn’t be home because that was the night of the year that our parents made babies, and you never knew when there would be another one. When I asked how they made babies, she just said ‘It’s gross and trust me: you don’t want to be there for it.’

  “She wouldn’t tell me anything more, so the grossest thing that I didn’t want to be home for came to mind, and it was cleaning cat puke from the carpet. So for three years—” she shot Addison a glare “—three years, I believed that’s how babies were made.”

  Ian laughed so heartily the sound practically bounced off the walls.

  “Okay, for the record,” Addison said, her ears getting hot, “I didn’t know that’s what she had assumed until much later. She had believed it so fully, too, because not long after, we got together with some family friends. My dad was out at the grill, my mom was stirring something on the stove, Chloe and I were playing with their son Max, and our cat coughed up a hairball. Max’s parents offered to clean up the mess.”

  “And then,” Chloe interrupted, “when Max came to school on Monday, for show-and-tell, he announced that his mom was pregnant and he was getting a little brother.”

  “Well, obviously you believed it. Max practically handed you proof of your theory.”

  “See?” Chloe said to Addison, but motioning to Ian, thrilled she was getting vindication all these years later for her misinterpretation of the facts.

  Ian was being so funny and charming and sweet, and Addison could barely keep her eyes off him. She could tell from how Chloe was reacting to him that she genuinely liked him and would totally support her being “smitten” over Ian. And who wouldn’t? He was pretty great. It still felt so unreal that he was interested in her.

  “How did you find out you were wrong?”

  “Fifth grade,” Chloe said, “during a basketball game at recess, Bobby Carson said he walked in on his parents naked and making babies, and said his eyeballs were scorched. I just stared at him, confused, and then asked, ‘Why were your parents getting cat puke out of the carpet without their clothes on?’ Do you have any idea what it’s like to be a fifth grader and have eight kids in a basketball game find out that you thought babies were made by cleaning up hair balls together?”

  Ian laughed, and Addison wanted to reach out and touch the smile lines at the edges of his eyes. Then he turned to her and said, “See? This is why, even if it’s in-elegant, you should go for the effective way of telling someone something, instead of letting them figure it out on their own.”

  She smacked him in the arm. “You just wait until that request comes back around to bite you.”

  His smile was big and beautiful. And then he picked up her hand and placed the sweetest kiss on the back of it and mumbled, “I look forward to it.”

  Embarrassing story after embarrassing story, the call finally ended and Addison thoroughly regretted having given Chloe the opportunity to tell so many. Ian had definitely found them entertaining, but there was no way he was going to want to go out with her again after this. Maybe she should’ve called Chloe to ask about inviting Ian to the video chat instead of texting her, and made her promise on a stack of Bibles that she wouldn’t tell stories about their childhood.

  Addison walked Ian to the front door and opened it for him. He stood paused in the doorway, then turned back to face her. “Do you want to go on a date with me?”

  “Yes.” Wow. Did he really just ask? Those stories hadn’t scared him away?

  “Right now.”

  “What? No. You can’t miss work today because of me. You already took the whole afternoon off yesterday to help me babysit.”

  “And I’m going to be scrambling to make up for lost time later, but it’s your birthday. And we’ve got five hours until you need to be back for your roommate dinner.” He reached a hand forward and grasped her hand, tugging her toward him. “Go on a date with me. Then today will be our actual second date, and it’ll be spontaneous.”

  Their hands were touching, and his captivating blue eyes were pulling her to him like they were, once again, magnets. She wasn’t sure she could’ve mustered a no any easier than she could’ve walked away from a sale on office supplies.

  15

  Ian

  Ian held Addi’s door as she climbed into his truck. “Where are we going on this date?”

  He closed her door and went and got in his side. “I don’t know. You wanted spontaneous, so I figured that we would decide as we go.” He tapped his lips, thinking. “It is beautiful outside. We could go for a walk through town, or maybe even go check out the viewpoint?” He hoped he had said it in a way that made his preference of the viewpoint just slightly known—enough to sway her to that choice, but not enough to make it feel like it wasn’t her choice.

  “Ooo! Let’s do the viewpoint. I haven’t been there since I was about ten.”

  A smile spread across his face as he pulled into the parking lot of a hair salon and then backed out and drove the other direction.

  “You’ve been here, what? Five or six weeks? How is it that you haven’t been to the viewpoint?”

  “I guess I forgot about it. Do you go there often?”

  “Not too often. Mostly when I need to think, or if I want to feel... centered.”

  The viewpoint was only a couple of minutes away, but he enjoyed every moment of the drive with Addison sharing the front seat with him. He wanted to reach out and hold her hand, but even though they had kissed last night, the action still somehow felt big. But from the corner of his eye, he saw the pinky on her hand twitch toward him. Like she wanted to reach out, but was waiting for him.

  So he reached out, putting his hand in hers, and she responded immediately by curling her fingers around his. The smile on his face was likely going to be there for a long time today.

  He pulled into the parking lot at the viewpoint. Only one other vehicle was there—the one he had expected. After he opened Addi’s door, they walked over to the guardrail at the edge of the parking lot and looked out across the valley filled with trees. There were only a few clouds in the sky, casting giant shadows across the valley while the parts that the sun shone lit up the area in brilliant greens and gold. Quicksand River meandered through the valley, which was perfectly framed in the distance by the ridge of the Devil’s Backbone and the brilliant white of Mount Hood.

  “I forgot how beautiful it is here,” Addi breathed.

  He stepped up next to her, marveling at the valley. They moved to the telescopes to see everything closer, and while she looked, he glanced up the road. Caden should be here any minute.

  “I don’t think I’ve ever been here on such a clear day,” Addi said. “Check it out—you can see the sun glinting off the river clear out there.”

  As he looked in the telescope, he heard the sound of wheels on gravel behind him. It was all he could do to keep looking in the telescope until he heard a woman say, “Excuse me.”

  He turned to see Caden and his girlfriend, Melinda, both with one foot on the flat base of electric stand-up scooters, a hand on the handlebar, helmets tucked under their other arms.

  “We rented these scooters at the little station on Settler’s Boulevard. We were about to put them in the back of our truck to return them, but they’re paid for until five. Are you two interested in taking them?”

  “You’re okay trusting a couple of strangers to get them back in time?” Ian asked.

  The grin on Caden’s face was going to give him away. “You two look trustworthy.”

  Ian turned to Addi and raised an eyebrow. “What do you think?”

  “Sounds fun!”

  Perfect. Caden and Melinda drove off, so Ian locked his truck, and the two of them put on the helmets and headed down the road on the scooters, the wind blowing in their faces as they rode. He kept glancing over at Addi to see if she was having fun o
r hating it, and the look of bliss on her face told him he had made a good choice.

  When they reached the end of the road and stopped at the stop sign, he said, “What do you think? Should we head toward town?”

  She nodded and turned right. He glanced over each time they came to a road where they had a choice of which way to turn, and could mostly tell which way she was thinking about choosing before she did it, so he only made the choice when hers would’ve taken them away from where he was aiming.

  They were getting closer to the middle of town when he spotted the small food truck up ahead. “Do you want to stop in the shade by that truck so we can decide where to go next?”

  Addi nodded and headed toward it.

  When they pulled to a stop, he took off his helmet. “What did you think of the scooters?”

  “This was the funnest thing I’ve done in so long! I think I’m going to have to get one of these for myself sometime.”

  He had hoped that would be her reaction.

  The guy at the food truck poked his head out of the window. “Hey. The lunch rush is done, so I’m packing up. I have enough fresh lemonade for about two cups full that I’d hate to throw out. You two interested?”

  “Wow, thanks,” Ian said. “We would love some.”

  After the man gave them their drinks and they thanked him profusely, they sat down at the picnic table in front of the truck.

  “Does this kind of luck always follow you around?” Addi asked. “Because it doesn’t for me, so I figure it must be you.”

  He shook his head. “I think it must just be the two of us together.”

  When they finished and got back on their scooters, he cocked his ear in the general direction of the high school. “Do you hear music?”

  Addi cocked her head too, concentrating. “I don’t know.”

  “I swear I hear it. Want to find its source?”

  The grin on her face said she was up for the adventure, which didn’t surprise him, so they headed off on their scooters, him mostly choosing which direction they took until they were actually close enough to hear, then he let Addi lead them the rest of the way to the high school. The entire band class had their chairs, music stands, and instruments on the lawn just outside of the band room.

  “Do they always practice outside?” Addi asked from where they’d pulled to a stop at the edge of the parking lot by the grass.

  Ian shrugged. “Want to stay and listen for a bit?” He motioned to where a woman was sitting with her two little kids on a blanket, watching them practice. “It looks like it’s okay to.”

  Addi nodded, so they stood with one foot on their scooters, watching. Less than a minute later, the woman came up to them, her toddler in her arms, the preschooler standing next to her. “Can you two do me a huge favor? My husband is the band director, and we want to see the practice. But my son needs to use the restroom, and I don’t want to pack up all our stuff to take him. Will you just sit on my blanket until I get back so it won’t blow away?”

  “We’d be happy to,” Addi said, and the two of them sat on the blanket, legs outstretched, leaning back on their arms as the band played a concert for two.

  When they finished playing the song they’d been practicing when they first arrived, they started playing Ed Sheeran’s Perfect—a song that he had heard playing in Addi’s room when he was helping Timini move in, so he knew she liked it. And he was right. She snuggled in closer to him and whispered, “I love this song.”

  They played a variety of songs, and each time, the band teacher said something like “Let’s do the song we’ve been practicing for halftime,” or “Let’s do our concert number.” Then, after they’d listened for about fifteen minutes, he said, “Let’s practice the one we do for birthdays.”

  Addi’s eyes flashed to his, a look of wonder on her face.

  As they played the first few notes, Ian murmured in her ear, “It looks like the universe wants you to have a great birthday.”

  She turned and murmured back, “I think the universe is doing a pretty amazing job of it.” Her breath was warm and soft against his neck, and between her breath and her words, heat spread through his chest.

  Right after the last few notes of the happy birthday song, the mom and kids came around the corner, so he and Addi stood up. With his back to Addi, he mouthed “Perfect timing” to the mom and gave her a thumbs up.

  He and Addi meandered on the scooters through a lot of streets that neither of them had been on before, just talking about random things. He found out that she liked baby goats, things organized alphabetically, and cheesecake, but really didn’t like her mom’s meatloaf or pens that wrote in black ink. Her favorite thing to do to relax was watching home organization shows, she was terrified of needles, and she got the cutest dimples on her cheeks when she was thinking of something that made her happy.

  The more time he spent around Addi, the more he realized how truly good a relationship could be. For so long, he’d been hurt that Zoe had called off their engagement and canceled their whole future together. As he and Addi rode scooters and chatted, he finally realized that, although Zoe could’ve handled things differently, she hadn’t been mean or malicious or hurtful. Calling off their wedding had been the right thing to do. By ending things, Zoe had opened the possibility for Ian to have a life with Addi. And imagining what that might be like was a million times more incredible than what he’d ever imagined with Zoe. His whole soul was filled with a forgiveness toward Zoe that he hadn’t guessed he’d been lacking until that moment.

  Just before five, they headed back toward Settler’s Boulevard and returned the scooters to the kiosk.

  “How are we going to get back to your truck now? Maybe we should’ve just ridden back to the viewpoint and brought them back in your truck.”

  Ian shrugged. “It’s your birthday and we’re together, so I’m sure the universe will have our backs on that, too. Want to go for a walk down Settler’s?”

  They chatted more as they walked past shops and restaurants, enjoying the rare cloud-free day. As they walked past the front of a café, a man inside knocked urgently on the bay window of the restaurant. When they turned to look, he held up one finger asking them to wait, and then raced around the other tables in the café to the door. Holding it open, he said, “We just ate and they’ve cleaned up the plates, and they were about to bring us dessert. My wife just went into labor, though, so we have to leave. Do you two want to come in and have the dessert? It’s already paid for.”

  Addison looked blown away at how this date was turning out, and Ian was thrilled. They thanked the couple, wished them all the best with the delivery, and sat down in their seats.

  “What are the chances of this happening, especially after everything else magical this day!”

  Ian just shrugged.

  The waitress came over, holding a dish with a molten lava chocolate cake, the chocolate filling spilling out, two scoops of vanilla ice cream, and a candle sticking up out of the ice cream, three other employees behind her. “What’s your name, honey?”

  Addi just looked confused. “What’s going on?”

  “The couple who were here before had ordered this dessert with a side of birthday wishes, so I need your name for when we sing happy birthday.”

  “Okay,” she said, eyeing Ian, who did his best to look perfectly innocent and just as surprised by what was going on. “Addison.”

  The four employees sang their restaurant’s version of “Happy Birthday,” and guests at a few other tables joined in. After the waitress put the dessert on the table, said, “I hope you have a wonderful birthday,” and walked away, Addi went back to eyeing him as she picked up her fork and got a bite of the cake. He scooped up a bite, too, making sure to get some ice cream with it, and she continued to eye him as they both chewed.

  “Did you set this up?”

  “I’m pretty sure the couple who just left did that.” He put another bite in his mouth.

  “Ian. You still do that e
yebrow thing you did as a kid whenever you weren’t telling the whole truth. Confess. You knew that today was my birthday before today, didn’t you?”

  “Yes,” he said slowly, “but not until last night.”

  “Bex?”

  He nodded. “Moments after I left the inn last night, Bex knocked on my kitchen door. When I opened it, she said, ‘Remember how I said I owe you for watching my sister’s kids today? I’m going to start paying you back by letting you know that Addison’s birthday is tomorrow, since I know she didn’t tell you.’” He gave her a look, reminding her how he felt about the fact that she hadn’t told him. “Then I just made a few calls today.”

  “So you knew the couple who was here before us?”

  “Yep. He’s a buddy of mine who does plumbing at a lot of the same sites as me.”

  “His wife didn’t just go into labor?”

  He shook his head. “She still has two or three weeks. I bribed them with the meal they ate before we got here if they would set up this.” He pointed at the dessert with his fork, and then loaded up another bite.

  As he chewed, he could see her working through the date, analyzing each thing, her expressions going between confusion and realization. “And the couple who gave us the scooters?”

  “My friend Caden and his girlfriend Melinda. I paid for the scooters. They took them for a ride along Ridge Street and planned it so they could be at the viewpoint by two-thirty.”

  She shook her head in disbelief, but also in amazement. Like she was impressed. “You set up the lemonade too, didn’t you?”

  He nodded. “I stopped by this morning on my way to a job, bought them, and talked the guy into playing along, which he was way more excited about doing than you would’ve guessed.”

  “Don’t tell me you set up the band, too.”