Irrelevant Jack 3

by Prax Venter

  “It’s going to be nice to have a defensive Hero in the party again,” Farah said. “Although, I’ve never heard of your three Classes.”

  Jack nodded. “Yeah, we’re all pretty special. But let’s wait until we get into the Tower before we establish roles. I still have more surprises to show you. Hope you can handle more mind-blowing insanity.”

  The lithe rogue gave him a wink that no one else saw.

  “I’m ready to handle anything you want to show me.”

  Lex turned to look at their new party member for the day, and by the way she hunched her shoulders slightly, Jack knew she was picking up on Farah’s flirtatious nature.

  “How’s Andor today?” the Bastion asked, her voice cool.

  The Shadow Blade’s half-smile faded a little. She sighed and looked over to the stairs leading up to the rentable rooms.

  “He’s not taking the situation well.”

  Reno came out with their food, and the good-natured man kept the conversation light as they finished their breakfast. The cows would be back soon- returning cheese to the menu, Irun and Kev were trying to spawn a child together, and then he turned to gossip about how the Townsfolk loved their miracle-working mayor.

  They all finished their meals, and Jack checked the Rest Bonus he’d received from the cherry and apple pancakes topped with nuts.

  Rest Bonus [+40 Health | +40 Mana | +32 Dodge | +10 Main Hand Damage | Gain 2 MP/ kill | Duration: Exit]

  ~ Fruity and crunchy keeps you fighting fit.

  When they were outside, Jack invited Lex, Haylee, and Farah into his party as they headed for the Tower. It was a warm sunny day for once, and he felt the urge to grab Lex’s hand, run off, and spend the rest of today down on the beach. Visions of the petite blonde beauty with a leather bikini equipped to her Chest Slot faded as thoughts of war and empire-building flooded back into his mind.

  He looked over into her big golden eyes as she equipped her cute leather hat. She gave him a smile, and it was impossible for him to stop his lips from returning it. They weren’t going to be lounging on the beach, but they would still be together.

  “Let’s do this,” he said and then pointed to the old wooden door located at the bottom of the silver Tower extending forever into the bright, indigo sky.

  The three women entered first and then Jack grabbed the ancient iron ring, triggering the flash of white nothing that preceded teleporting into whatever madness the first Floor of the Tower held for them today.

  When Jack could see again, he found that all four of them were still standing out under blue skies. They were up on a mossy stone balcony connected to a massive brick building. The softly pulsing Exit Orb rested on its stone plinth behind them and behind it was a vast dark ocean. The whole brutal structure appeared to be on an island. Ahead of them was an archway with bent iron bars that must have blocked this crumbling balcony at one point. Above the square roof, he saw multiple stories to this structure and on the far end was a distant lighthouse standing over it all.

  Jack shifted his weight between his boots to test the ground and found the cracked, weathered granite indisputably solid. He sighed.

  Time to do the “Welcome to Jack and Alt” speech once again.

  “Okay,” he began, turning his attention to his three party members. “I’m not sure how far we’re going to make it, but this is the first time we have a full party, so I expect we should be able to push a few Floors past our current max of 35.” He got nods from everyone and then turned his focus on their new Shadow Blade. “You seem to roll with the punches, Farah, so I am going to hit you with everything I can do fairly quickly so we can move this right along.”

  He paused as he remembered the Floor-skipping ability Alt had unlocked- ‘Elevator Alt’. Maybe they would use it at some point… but not today.

  “He doesn’t mean he’ll actually hit you,” Lex clarified. “He’s just talking about our good friend, Alt.”

  “Yes,” Jack said, snapping out of his mental derailment, “our party really has five members.”

  With a thought, he activated ‘Call Alt’.

  The sleek miniature spaceship shimmered into existence between everyone, and Jack felt the immovable stone railing at his back as he made room for his imaginary friend.

  “Greetings, Farah,” the spaceship said with his slightly modulated voice. “It’s good to meet you, and I offer my condolences for Emberstone. I am Jack’s minion and can take the form of any enemy he’s damaged with his ranged ability.”

  The tall woman with the tan eyes let her mouth hang open for about two seconds and then she snapped it shut.

  “Okay…” Farah started slow but pulled it together pretty quickly. “Handy. But I have a feeling there’s even more.”

  “You are correct,” Haylee answered in an ominous tone that indicated this woman had no idea how much more there was. Jack saw the Dark Prism’s grey eyes locked on Alt’s “true” form. Haylee was clear that she preferred him in this state.

  “We should explain as we go,” Lex said, pointing toward the dim tunnel ahead of them. “We’re all going to be in here for longer than we ever have. Farah, it would probably be best if you took the lead for now so we can see your abilities and learn how they could synergize with ours.”

  Farah looked at Jack and then back to the shorter Bastion. A half-smile slowly spread on her sly face.

  “Excellent,” she said. “I haven’t been past Floor 10 in a long while. I have a feeling you absurdly capable people are going to help me slide up multiple levels today.”

  “Do you think she’s ready for the interface upgrade?” Alt said, firing his jets to angle toward Lex.

  Jack couldn’t help but grin at that. He didn’t know if it was their linked minds but knew the AI would never have said it out loud if he weren’t trying to manipulate their new party member.

  “I’ll gladly handle whatever upgrades you’re capable of giving me,” Farah said quickly.

  The spaceship tipped forward as if he were bowing.

  “Very well.”

  A moment later, the tall rogue uncrossed her long arms slowly as her smile faded.

  “Even more handy,” she said. “All of this is certainly challenging my sanity. If I hadn’t spoken with other Townsfolk and Harrak last night, I might have… not been prepared.”

  Jack checked his HUD to find their new team member in the list.

  JACK HP 455/455 MP 252/252

  LEX HP 677/677

  HAYLEE HP 287/287

  FARAH HP 395/395

  ALT HP 225/225

  Coins: 9581

  Inventory Value: 0

  Alt Value: 30,559/250,000

  “I’m glad you’re not freaking out,” Jack said. “And, Lex is right. We’ll each take turns sweeping this Floor, including Alt. Please, show us what you got.”

  The slender rogue pulled out her unique daggers and shot Jack a sly grin.

  “All eyes on me.”

  Farah stepped into the dim hallway ahead, her leather-wrapped hips sashaying with exaggerated emphasis, and Jack shook his head. He turned to the Bastion.

  “After you, my love.” He made sure to say it loud enough for everyone to hear. He certainly didn’t need any more complexity added to his life and wanted to clarify the situation before any misunderstandings. Lex gave him a small smirk before following. Jack went in next with Haylee and Alt behind him.

  Jack’s eyes adjusted to the ancient, crumbling hallway, and if this weren’t Floor 1, he’d start feeling a bit worried about the close quarters. The passage was wide enough to maybe allow two of them to fight side by side, but range of movement was still a factor. A small part of him felt anxiety over fighting alongside this relatively unknown Hero, but she didn’t have any negative marks like Meri, the lumberjack who’d stabbed her husband.

  The group came to an intersection in the hallway, and Farah stopped. Ahead, Jack could see the hallway’s stone walls broken up by many small rooms but didn’t have an angle on the new p
ath to their right.

  “Monster,” she said and began stalking forward.

  The rest stood and waited at the intersection for Farah to do her thing. The branching hallway followed the same layout in this new direction, and Jack’s hunch that this was a prison shifted to being an insane asylum when he saw the shambling creature in the stained straitjacket. Its buckle-strapped body seemed human enough, but its head was an enormous moldy, black mushroom. As the thing lurched toward them, dragging one rotting foot as its archaic metal restraints and locks made soft clanking noises. Otherwise, the dark hallways were still and silent.

  Farah moved closer to the left wall as she swiftly stalked forward, and Jack noticed that her black leather boots made no sound as she moved. The mushroom-headed monster angled to intercept the slender Hero, but just before she was in striking distance, Farah faded into thin air.

  Jack blinked as he tried to track her movements, but the Shadow Blade had become nearly invisible.

  The monster in the moldy straitjacket stopped for a moment, equally confused, but it quickly resumed its shuffling gait toward the rest of the Heroes waiting at the intersection. The creature took one step before Farah reappeared behind it and stabbed both of her blades into its back.

  Insane Fungus -475 | Defeated

  The monster vanished as a blob of buzzing white noise.

  “Nice,” Jack said nodding. Bosses were always the most dangerous and with both Haylee and this new burst-damage Hero, they were going to be ending more of those tougher, higher-Floor fights before they even began.

  Farah’s cocky smile reappeared as she sheathed her daggers and put a hand on her hip.

  “Like what you saw, did you? I’ll tell you what- that new damage notification is exquisite. Seeing the actual number after all this time is… uniquely satisfying.”

  “Alt bestows the best gifts,” Haylee said from behind him.

  The rogue shifted her tan eyes to the miniature spaceship and nodded.

  “Mmm, I hope there’s more to come. I could get spoiled with these kinds of upgrades.”

  “You have a single focused Path, correct?” Lex asked.

  Farah nodded as she walked back up to the group.

  “Correct. Pure Assassination. I can Hide, and I can Ambush.”

  Alt floated forward. “With Haylee’s Expose Weakness ability, Farah’s Ambush critical strike attack can easily reach over 1,000 damage. If I were to add up the potential damage output of myself, Jack, Haylee, and Farah, we might be able to break 3,000 dealt in the span of one moment.”

  “Until we all get better items,” Farah said. “Since most of us wear leather, how are we three going to handle upgrades?”

  Lex answered quickly. “Jack can instantly retrieve all item drops and has a limitless inventory. Upgrades will go to Jack first, as Alt’s power is tied directly to his stats. Then, between you and I, we’ll see what type of leather it is. As a Shadow Blade, I assume you are not stacking Defense.”

  Farah gave Lex her patented sly smile. “I heard about the size of Jack’s inventory; I can’t wait to see this for myself.

  Lex crossed her arms, her golden eyes locked on Farah.

  “Why don’t I go next,” Jack said, stepping past the taller woman and down the hallway. “I need to tag these mushrooms of madness anyway.”

  Their new party member turned to the floating spaceship. “And then you can become one of these monsters?”

  Alt dipped his prow again. “That is correct. Once per Floor.”

  “You sure are one handy minion…”

  Jack let the others fill Farah in on how everything worked as he stalked forward past the empty jail cells. They looked as if it had been covered with linoleum tiles at some point, but age, the elements, and possibly eternally shuffling mushroom monsters had worn the ground down to the solid stone below.

  Jack’s musings about the Floor ended when Alt spoke in his mind.

  “I feel I should inform you that Farah’s Class is also built to dual-wield. She can attack with each dagger in one second. It’s one of those taken-for-granted things in System Sana. Did you want to see her Path information?”

  He did, so Alt summoned a black lacquered interface panel with the Shadow Blade’s abilities.

  PATH Assassination [2]

  ►Ambush - [Activated | 4 MP | Main Hand Damage + Off-Hand Damage | 2.5 x Damage if undetected by target]

  ~ Surprise evisceration.

  ► Hide [Activated (Self) | 20 second recharge | 2 MP | Sneak +500 for 10 seconds]

  ~ Bend light and dampen sound around you. Higher Sneak bonus and duration at higher levels.

  Jack dismissed the information when movement pulled his attention to the right. Another Insane Fungus struggled to move forward inside the small room half-covered by broken rusty bars, but there was a chain looped through a strap on its straitjacket that kept the thing tethered to the wall.

  With a glance over to his party, Jack partially backed into the opposite cell, held out his sword so everyone could see, then activated his Mining Laser. A burst of reddish-orange light illuminated the whole hallway as the beam of energy surged from the tip of his blade.

  Insane Fungus -124 | Defeated

  Next, Haylee used her Withering Stare ability to slow one, called out its weakness (a large brass buckle), and then fired off a Light Ray with her Star Chaser bow to demonstrate its useful piercing ability.

  Insane Fungus Critical! -421 | Defeated

  For the next one, Lex demonstrated her Aether Tone/Shout combo while Alt fired his dual photon orbs directly through the Bastion’s back.

  Insane Fungus -44 | Defeated

  It was only after they found another balcony and stood out under the blue skies again that Jack thought he recognized this particular structure.

  “Alt, did your America have a Fort Alcatraz?”

  “I think you’re right,” the spaceship said slowly, as he spun around to take in the area again. “I have access to old records that appear vaguely similar to this layout. Alcatraz Asylum was most notable for Amelia Earhart’s daring escape by seaplane across the entire Pacific Ocean.”

  “That’s all kinds of wrong,” Jack said, leaning over the railing to see wet rocks and foaming black waves. “In my world, Alcatraz was a military fort where they stored the nation’s gold reserves.” He turned to face Lex who was listening intently- they all were. Jack continued. “This whole place was piled to the walls with gold bars. Stacks and stacks of ‘em. And there were mounted gun turrets that launched searing hot metal chunks at any thieves that might try and take it. There was this great movie- er… um story that was told called Flak Cannon about a battle over the island fortress. Bad guys in flying machines planned this complicated heist to rob the place, and the sky was filled with explosions and twisted metal. One of my favorites as a kid.”

  “Utterly fascinating,” Alt said while Lex, Haylee, and especially Farah seemed to be still trying to comprehend Jack’s words.

  “Our walls have our own powerful turrets now, thanks to you,” Lex said.

  Haylee remained quiet, as was normal, but the way her thin brow was furrowed gave Jack the impression that something he said about the real-world place that this Floor layout reminded him of troubled her in some way.

  “Let’s move,” Jack said, extending his arm back toward the crumbling asylum. “Alt, please clear the rest, but save me the Boss.”

  “Understood,” the spaceship said, and his blue jets of flame intensified as he flew through the darkened doorway.

  The rest of the Floor went swiftly, and Jack instantly obliterated the moldy doctor with syringes for hands that burst through a locked door after the other monsters were all dead. He shifted Alt into the Boss as a demonstration for their new party member, but Jack’s minion reported that the form wasn’t all that remarkable. With the Floor cleared, Jack moved to loot the golden Boss chest.

  “We usually skip that trash,” Farah said as she watched Jack deposit items worth a total
of 4 value into his inventory. “Everything about your Town makes so much more sense now.”

  They climbed Floor after Floor, and Farah seemed to be taking Jack’s special abilities in stride. What had she and Harrak talked about last night? He last saw them chatting at the bar when he went up to bed with Lex after the town hall meeting. Floor 2 was knee-high gray lint that spread from horizon to horizon with unsettling skin-covered jack-in-the-boxes popping out from the layer of fluff. Floor 3 pitted them against cords of logs with arms and legs wielding axes, and 4 was a long, winding river hosting aggressive, yellow reeds.

  Jack felt the gradual change in their group dynamics as their movements and strategies accommodated their new burst-damage member.

  Floor 33 was where Farah began to gain new levels, and with them, new gear. The Shadow Blade also began to show her deadly competence in straight melee combat as the difficulty steadily increased. On Floor 35, Jack watched her dodge a projectile fired from a plastic ape with a crossbow then close the distance swiftly to stab the thing in its painted face.

  Synthetic Protector -100 | HP 345/445

  She activated her Hide ability and the monstrosity with matte-brown paint swiveled its head around in search of her, a fake snarl painted on its molded face. Farah reappeared behind the confused creature just as it switched its aggressive focus to Lex, and she jabbed both daggers into its back at once.

  Synthetic Protector -488 | Defeated

  Jack shifted his focus back to his Mining Laser melting his target as it fired its bolts skillfully blocked by the Bastion’s shield. Moments later, the fight was over.

  “That was nice and quick,” Lex said as she sheathed her sword and rejoined the group.

  Floor 35 was the furthest anyone in the party had been, and they all stood as a group as they looked out over the bizarre, tea party landscape toward the giant mech-like action figure standing near the far end. This was the fifth and last table of plastic creatures that stood between them and the Boss and Jack had to agree with Lex. There were countless tables set for tea with porcelain tableware and little bite-sized sandwiches or cake, but only five of the tables had been occupied.