The Little Book of Hygge
Page 7
CHAPTER NINE
HYGGE ON THE CHEAP
THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE ARE FREE
There is nothing fancy, expensive, or luxurious about a pair of ugly woolen hygge socks—and that is a vital feature of the anatomy of hygge. Champagne and oysters may be many things, but hygge is not one of them.
Hygge is humble and slow. It is choosing rustic over new, simple over posh and ambience over excitement. In many ways, hygge might be the Danish cousin to slow and simple living.
It is wearing your pajamas and watching Lord of the Rings the day before Christmas, it is sitting in your window watching the weather while sipping your favorite tea, and it is looking into the bonfire on summer solstice surrounded by your friends and family while your twistbread slowly bakes.
Simplicity and modesty are central to hygge, but they are also considered virtues when it comes to Danish design and culture. Simplicity and functionality are the main ingredients of Danish design classics, and the Danes’ love affair with modesty means that bragging about your accomplishments and flashing your Rolex are not only frowned upon and considered poor taste, but spoil the hygge. In short, the more bling, the less hygge.
Consequently, you can also play the hygge card as an exit strategy if you enter a high-end restaurant you can’t afford. “Shouldn’t we find a place that is more hyggeligt?” is a perfectly valid reason to find a cheaper establishment. Not Noma, though. That restaurant is really hyggeligt. It has the right lighting.
Hygge is about appreciating the simple pleasures in life and can be achieved on a shoestring budget. The poem and song “The Happy Day of Svante” by Benny Andersen is famous in Denmark. It’s all about savoring the moment and enjoying simple pleasures: “Look, real daylight soon. Red sun and waning moon. She takes a shower for me. Me whom it’s good to be. Life’s not bad, for it’s all we have got. And the coffee’s almost hot.”
Okay, so Danes might be better at hygge than poetry, but one of the most consistent patterns in happiness research is how little difference money makes. Of course, if you can’t afford to eat, money is of the utmost importance, but if you’re not battling poverty or struggling to make ends meet, an additional $100 per month is not going to move the needle when it comes to happiness.
This fits well with hygge. You cannot buy the right atmosphere or a sense of togetherness. You cannot hygge if you are in a hurry or stressed out, and the art of creating intimacy cannot be bought by anything but time, interest, and engagement in the people around you.
Hygge can and often will be about eating or drinking, but the more it counteracts consumption, the more hyggeligt it is. The more money and prestige is associated with something, the less hyggeligt it becomes. The simpler and more primitive an activity is, the more hyggeligt it is. Drinking tea is more hyggeligt than drinking champagne, playing board games is more hyggeligt than playing computer games, and home-cooked food and biscuits are more hyggeligt than store-bought ones.
In short, if you want hygge, there is no amount of money that you can spend which will increase the hygge factor—at least not if you are buying anything more expensive than a candle. Hygge is an atmosphere that is not only unimproved by spending more money on it, but rather, in some ways, the opposite.
Hygge may be bad fort capitalism, but it may prove to be very good for your personal happiness. Hygge is appreciating the simple pleasures in life and can be achieved with very little money. Here are ten examples how the best hygge in life is free—or almost so.
TEN INEXPENSIVE HYGGE ACTIVITIES
1. BRING OUT THE BOARD GAMES
We live in the age of Netflix, Candy Crush, and an endless supply of electronic entertainment. We hang out with technology instead of with each other. However, playing board games is still popular—in part because of the hygge. Every year, my friend Martin organizes the mother of board games: a game of Axis & Allies. Set in World War II, it is essentially a complex version of the game Risk. The game usually lasts for about fourteen hours, and Martin usually leaves his very understanding girlfriend in a hotel for the night. We make the evening into more than simply playing a game. There’ll be classical music on—mostly Wagner and Beethoven—and smoke from cigars fills the room, so you can barely see our group of grown men in uniforms. Admittedly, we may take it to an extreme level, but we do it for the hygge.
But why are board games hygge? Well, first of all, it is a social activity. You play games together. You create common memories and strengthen bonds. All of Martin’s friends still remember the moment in the 2012 game when the Allies suddenly realized that Moscow would fall. In addition, for many of us who grew up with Monopoly or Trivial Pursuit, board games are full of nostalgia and take us back to simpler times. There is also a slowness to the activity (especially if the game takes fourteen hours), a tangibility, and an air of hygge.
2. PANTRY PARTY
This is one of my favorites. Invite your friends over to your house for an afternoon or an evening of cooking and hygge. The rules are simple. Every person brings ingredients to make something that goes in the pantry (or in the fridge). Strawberry jam, sweet pickle relish, ketchup, chicken stock, limoncello, pumpkin soup—you name it. Everybody also brings jars, cans, bottles, or containers in a shape that will allow them to store a bounty of homemade treats. The beauty of it is the diversity. Instead of having ten servings of pumpkin soup, you now have mango chutney, ginger beer, pickled chili, baba ghanoush, a loaf of sourdough bread, plum marmalade, elderflower cordial, walnut aquavit, and raspberry sorbet. Yum.
3. TV NIGHT
One of my best friends and I always watch Game of Thrones together. Every two weeks or so, we watch two episodes. No more. I know it is borderline Amish in the age of Netflix not to binge-watch a whole season of your favorite show once it is released, but this approach has some advantages. First, it brings TV back to being something more sociable. Second, it allows you to look forward to something on a regular basis. So restrain yourself from bingeing and invite friends over for weekly viewings of a specific TV show.
4. CROQUET
Playing croquet is a great way of hanging out with family and friends. The game is informal and slow, so it allows for conversation at the same time and there is something to watch while you talk. Find the nearest park or a yard with a stretch of grass you can use as a croquet field, and bring blankets and a picnic basket.
5. SET UP A MINI-LIBRARY
An inexpensive and sustainable way to make a shared space (in your apartment building or neighborhood) a little bit more hyggeligt is to build a small library. Find a rustic dresser or some shelves and put them in the hallway or on the stairway landing (you may want to ask for permission first). Put a handful or more of the books you have already read in the library, but let your neighbors help you increase the selection of titles by following the principle of leaving a book whenever you take one. Being greeted with a display of books when you come into your building is a more hyggelig way of returning home. Also, it may encourage more hygge interaction among the tenants.
6. MAKE A FIRE
A fire is definitely part of the hygge equation and so is the slow preparation of very unfussy food, but also involved is the togetherness around the fire, the fact that there is no need to keep the conversation going because you have the sound of the fire. Now the fire has burned down and the embers are ready. You have found a suitable straight stick and stripped the bark from the end. Wrap the bread tightly around the stick and place it over the glowing embers. People are gathered in a close circle around the fire now, moving around a little as the smoke changes direction. Your eyes hurt from the smoke, your hand hurts from being close to the fire, and your bread is turning black on the outside yet remaining unbaked on the inside. But it doesn’t get any more hyggelig than this.
7. OUTDOOR MOVIES
Many cities offer outdoor film screenings during the summer. In Copenhagen, they take place during August, as in June and July it is simply too bright in the evenings to show movies. T
he sound is usually difficult to hear, you sit kind of uncomfortably on the ground, without back support, and the people who were smart enough to bring small chairs set up camp right in front of you and thus block some of your view of the screen. However, it is still total hyggeligt. I often go with a couple of friends. We set up camp, eat some food, drink some wine, talk, and wait for the movie to start.
8. SWAP PARTY
Remember that lamp you have in your basement and have been meaning to put on eBay for two years now? Or that extra blender you and your partner now have since you decided to move in together? Why not get rid of it by swapping it for something that you do need—and have a hyggelig evening at the same time? Invite friends and family over for a swap party. The rules are simple. Each person brings something he or she doesn’t use anymore that could be of value to someone else. Beyond being wallet-and eco-friendly, it is also a nice opportunity to clean out your wardrobe, kitchen cabinet, basement, or wherever you store the things you never use. Furthermore, it may be more convenient and fun to swap with friends than to spend a weekend pushing your junk at the flea market or posting a listing.
9. SLEDDING
In the wintertime, it is easy to feel stuck inside. And while it can be hyggeligt to relax with your book and a cup of tea, it is even more hyggeligt after you have spent a day in the snow. So gather a group of people and head for the hills. If you have a beautiful wooden sleigh stashed in the basement, great, but cheaper options exist. You can use a sturdy plastic bag to sleigh down a hill. Sledding is free and fun. Bring a winter picnic basket with tea or mulled wine for afterward. Don’t drink and sled.
10. PLAY
In many ways, some of the activities above, like sledding and board games, fall into the same category—play. We loved them when we were kids but for some reason we stop doing them when we become grown-ups. Adults are not supposed to play. We are supposed to stress, worry, and be too busy dealing with life’s problems. But according to a study undertaken by Princeton University and led by Alan Krueger, professor in economics and public affairs there, we are happiest when we are involved in engaging leisure activities.
One of our issues as adults is that we become too focused on the results of an activity. We work to earn money. We go to the gym to lose weight. We spend time with people to network and further our careers. What happened to doing something just because it’s fun? Notice in the table that follows how social activities such as sports, hiking, partying, and playing with children are the top scorers.
CHAPTER TEN
HYGGE TOUR OF COPENHAGEN
HYGGE SAFARI
If you should visit Copenhagen, you might want to visit some of these hyggelige places.
NYHAVN (NEW HARBOR)
This used to be a dodgy part of town with rowdy sailors and “ladies of pleasure.” Today you can visit one of the many restaurants for a pickled herring and schnapps. If that is not your thing, and if the weather is nice, do like the locals and buy a few beers from a shop, have a seat at the bulwark, and watch the city go by.
LA GLACE
Dive into the cream. Remember the importance of cakes? If there were a Camino de Santiago for cake, La Glace would be the Santiago de Compostela Cathedral. La Glace was established in 1870 and is the oldest confectionery shop in Denmark.
TIVOLI GARDENS
The Tivoli Gardens were founded in 1843 and are a classic attraction in Copenhagen, where many citizens purchase annual passes to the gardens. While many people visit during the summer, the best time for hygge is when Tivoli dresses up for Christmas and New Year’s Eve (usually from mid-November until January). This is a celebration of light. Several hundred thousand lights turn the garden into a magical place in the winter darkness, and you can enjoy some gløgg near one of the bonfires in the garden or get warm by the fireplace at Nimb Bar.
ROWBOAT IN CHRISTIANSHAVN
Christianshavn is part of the city center in Copenhagen but it is separated from the rest of the center by the Inner Harbor. It is dominated by canals and may remind you a little of Amsterdam. The best way to experience this part of town is by renting a rowboat and rowing along the canals. Bring blankets, wine, and a picnic basket.
GRÅBRØDRETORV
Being surrounded by the old houses here will transport you back centuries. This hyggelige square gets its name from the monastery of the Grey Brothers (Grå brødre), established in 1238. There are plenty of cozy restaurants in the square. At Peder Oxe you can get classical Danish smørrebrød and enjoy the fireplace. Even one of the hairdressing salons has a fireplace (and a French bulldog, who will happily sleep on your lap while you have your hair cut). Total hygge. You might also be lucky enough to see a full pig roast at the square.
VÆRNEDAMSVEJ
At Værnedamsvej, cars zigzag between cyclists and pedestrians. This short street will make you slow down and smell the flowers and the coffee. Florists, cafés, wine bars, and interior design shops make this a wonderful place to spend a lazy and hyggelig afternoon.
A SMØRREBRØD PLACE
Smørrebrød means, literally, spread bread. It is an open sandwich on rye bread. Danes are huge fans of rye bread, so it is usually one of the first things they miss when they are living abroad. Some expats living in Denmark will, however, refer to the bread as the devil’s sandals, as they really dislike the taste and find the bread tough to chew. In all regards, smørrebrød is a truly Danish lunch experience. Smørrebrød can have an almost limitless number of toppings, from herring to raw beef, egg, and seafood, and some have colorful names like “the veterinarian’s night food.” Smørrebrød is usually served with beer and schnapps. In Copenhagen, you will find many traditional smørrebrød places, and such a lunch will surely get the hygge going.
LIBRARY BAR
In the Plaza Hotel, near the central train station, you will find the Library Bar, which opened in 1914. Here are sofas, wooden panels, leather-bound books, and really hyggelig lighting. The bar features live music from time to time, but on a quiet night it is well suited for deep conversation. If you visit during Christmas, you will find a Christmas tree hanging upside down from the ceiling.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHRISTMAS
IT’S THE MOST HYGGELIG TIME OF YEAR
For many people—Danes included—Christmas is a wonderful time. However, wonderful is far from the only word used to describe it. If you ask people of any nationality to describe Christmas in one word, adjectives like happy, cheerful, warm, and heartfelt would probably surface. Danes would agree with a lot of these. But, they would object, “the most fitting word is missing. You forgot hyggelig!”
In Denmark, in one month of the year, the days are so short you will be lucky to catch a glimpse of the sun. Riding your bike to and from work in the cold and wet and in complete darkness, you begin to question why anybody ever thought that settling in Denmark would be a good idea. Yes, I know, in Denmark it is not –30 degrees outside, nor are we troubled with hurricanes or tsunamis. But living here, you do get the sense that the weather gods have taken a certain disliking to the Danes; that they want us to feel miserable and uncomfortable at least one month a year.
As unlikely as it sounds, this is the season of hygge in Denmark. Danes simply will not let the weather or the laws of nature define their emotional well-being. Therefore, instead of going into hibernation—which does indeed seem appealing on damp December mornings—Danes have decided to make the best of things.
Even though it is possible to hygge all year round, only once a year is hygge the ultimate goal of an entire month. Without achieving hygge, a Dane’s toil for the Christmas project is redundant. Chestnuts, a fireplace, friends, and family coming together around a table of delicious treats; decorations of red, green, and gold; the fresh scent of pine from the Christmas tree; carols everybody knows; and the broadcasting of the very same TV shows as last year—and every year before that—these are features of a fairly ordinary Christmas all over the world. From Dallas to Durban, people sing along to t
he words of “Last Christmas.” From Dublin to Dubai, people know the plot of A Christmas Carol. This is no less true in Denmark.
Indeed, there are Christmas traditions which are specifically Danish, but a Danish Christmas is not considerably different from a German, French, or British one in terms of activities or traditions.
What is different in Denmark, though, is that a Danish Christmas will always be planned, thought of, and evaluated in relation to the concept of hygge. At no other time of the year will you hear Danes mentioning hygge as much. It is literally mentioned at any given opportunity. And, of course, Danish includes a compound word, julehygge (Christmas hygge), which is both an adjective and a verb. “Do you want to come over for some julehygge?”
In the pages that follow, I will try to outline a recipe for a proper hyggelig Christmas—a perfect Danish Christmas—which is in itself a daunting task. Danes hold their Christmas dear, and I am sure a lot of Danes will disagree with the elements of Christmas I am going to mention. However, most will probably recognize more than one element from their own traditions.