by Kim Nash
They all laughed and agreed.
‘I’m happy to throw a pesto pasta dish together and then perhaps we can have that with the cooked meats that are in the fridge. There was fresh bread delivered this morning and cheeses and stuff. We’ll be able to make a meal out of that, won’t we?’ Liv asked.
The girls spent a leisurely afternoon hanging around the pool, snoozing, reading and chatting. They were all looking forward to another easy evening; when the villa was this gorgeous, they really wanted to make the most of it.
Debs went up to her room to grab her paperback. The French doors leading to her balcony were still open from when she went out this morning and she wandered out onto the large roof terrace. She leant on the railings, admiring the sea view, when into her line of vision walked Eduardo. God, he really was drop-dead gorgeous with his grey hair and suntanned face. The phrase ‘Silver Fox’ popped into her mind. He looked up at her and his face lit up. His smile, as he flashed his bright white teeth, contrasting against his sun-tanned face, was dazzling. Her tummy fluttered as if there were a million butterflies trying to escape. He walked to the bottom of her balcony and she felt as if she could almost reach out and touch him.
‘Good afternoon again, Eduardo.’
‘Good afternoon, miss. Are you having good holiday here in Portugal?’
‘We, erm, yes. We’re having a lovely time, thank you.’
He lingered, waiting for her to say something else, but her words seemed to dry up. He smiled, picked up the hosepipe again and saluted her before he carried on watering the hanging baskets.
She picked up her book and took it downstairs. In a split-second decision, instead of going through the lounge and onto the terrace, she walked through a side door and into the area of the garden where Eduardo had been. He was nowhere to be seen, so she turned and headed towards the terrace when a sudden cough from behind her startled her.
‘Whoa!’ She put her hand to her chest.
‘I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to make you scared.’
‘That’s OK, it’s fine. Honestly.’
She smiled. He really was incredibly handsome. As he smiled back, she noticed that he had the twinkliest eyes she had ever seen.
‘I wanted to give you this.’ He held out his hand, in which a beautiful crimson flower sat. It was a cross between a poppy and a hibiscus. ‘Flor da Romãnzeira, or you might know it as a pomegranate flower. We have many fruit trees here in this garden, lemons, limes, but the pomegranate flower is the prettiest. A beautiful flower for a beautiful lady.’ He held the flower up to her head, tucked it behind her ear, bowed and walked away. She stared dreamily at the space he had vacated and wondered whether love at first sight was really a thing.
She walked round to the terrace and Liv raised an eyebrow. She reached up and touched the flower.
‘Pretty, Debs. It suits you. Did you pick it in the garden?’
‘It’s a Flor da Romãnzeira.’
‘Oh, get you! How on earth do you know that’s what it’s called?’
‘Eduardo gave it to me.’
‘Ooh, I bet that’s not all Eduardo wanted to give to you, judging by the way he was looking at you earlier,’ said Samantha as she came over to the sunbed area.
‘Don’t be vulgar, Samantha. It doesn’t become you,’ said Debs, before she and her friends all laughed at her attempt to be prissy.
‘How do we feel about going into the gypsy market in Quarteira tomorrow?’ Samantha asked. ‘I’ve been doing some research. Don’t roll your eyes at me, Olivia Pemberton.’ She’d anticipated Liv’s reaction before she’d even made it and more laughter ensued. ‘The Internet says that there are loads of stalls selling traditional handmade goods and local produce. Apparently, it’s one of the most popular markets in the Algarve.’
‘It sounds great,’ said Fiona. ‘I love a market. I’d love to see if they have any leather handbags, I do love a holiday handbag.’
‘Fantastic, that’s tomorrow’s excursion planned. How lovely! See, I might be boring for staking out the neighbourhood, but at least we’re getting to do some nice stuff while we’re here. Right then, I’m going up for a nap. I never knew doing nothing was so exhausting.’
They agreed to meet up at six p.m. for drinks. Cocktail hour seemed to be becoming a thing.
Fifteen
Liv had run herself a long luxurious bath and must have dozed off at one stage because she heard a deep rumbling noise and realised that it was coming from her. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt as relaxed. It was so nice, to have a bath in peace and quiet, without anyone yelling up the stairs at her asking where their SuperDry top or their golf trousers were.
All the males in her life, except for Hector, expected to put something in the wash and for it to be back and hanging up in the wardrobe within a couple of hours.
She had hoped that them having that bit of independence while she was away might make them think twice about their constant demands but from the messages she’d had already, it would appear that wasn’t the case. She hoped they were missing her, not just for what she did for them but for who she was.
She knew that Hector would miss her but also knew that Steve from ChasinTails loved him nearly as much as she did and would make sure he was fed and got his walk twice a day. It came to something that she would trust this job to someone outside of the family rather than one of them. Said it all, really.
It was her own fault, in a way. She thought back to when they were first married and how they’d both worked so hard to pay their bills and afford the house that George wanted them to buy to make them look good to their friends. She couldn’t have cared less where they lived as long as they were happy and together. At that time she was working as a personal shopper in a department store. She loved that job, and was very good at it, earning a huge amount of commission and a number of awards from the company for being one of the highest-performing staff members.
When George’s business had taken off she’d been a huge help behind the scenes, and was there at his beck and call. He concentrated on the business side of things and she arranged all the extravagant social events, which were so important in his world. They were the perfect partnership. He talked through all his business decisions with her and she felt part of a very special team. It had been so exciting when everything came to fruition and they could expand into other markets, which had opened up huge opportunities neither of them thought would ever be possible.
When Olivia discovered she was pregnant with James, George was insistent that he wanted her to take it easy and not work. It wasn’t an easy decision for her to make, but she felt it was something she’d go back to when James was a few months old.
Olivia bit her lip as one of her most precious memories hit her hard, right in the stomach. She was sitting in the nursery in the middle of the night feeding James, when she felt another presence in the room. She looked up and saw George watching them from the doorway, totally mesmerised. He walked over to them, knelt at her feet, kissed James on his tiny button nose and her on her forehead, as if they were his most cherished possessions and that life couldn’t get any better. The look of pride on his face at that particular moment had always stayed with her.
She’d not noticed when that feeling had left him. She supposed it must have gradually slipped away after the euphoria of parenthood had eased off, after disturbed sleep and leaking boobs. She felt that after a few months he went on to see them as a bit of an inconvenience in his life.
With one thing and another, the new house and a new baby kept her busy and before she knew it three years had gone by. At that time she had been thinking about getting in touch with her previous employer, to see if there were any jobs available, when she found out she was pregnant with Seb. After that, there didn’t seem to be any point.
George’s involvement with his family lessened when Seb was young. He wasn’t the easiest child, and his colic had meant that sleep was something that didn’t happen for long in that
house. It was hard. But at a time when they should have pulled together, sadly they seemed to pull a little further apart.
Taking on the role of the perfect mother and the perfect businessman’s wife, Olivia spent her days making sure that the house was always tidy, the children were always clean, beautifully clothed, attended the best nurseries and then schools, got to all the right extra-curricular clubs, and that George didn’t have to worry about a thing on the home front.
Thinking about it now, she wished she’d played things differently back then and insisted on returning to work when the children were young, and even in the gap in between them. She knew she could have money for anything she wanted; and anything she didn’t want but George wanted her to have – but it wasn’t about him giving her money. It was about being worth something. It was about being important enough in her family’s lives for her opinions to be considered. Perhaps earning her own money would be a start. It might make her feel more valued.
If she wanted to repair her fractured family, it was about time she stood up for herself.
Being away was clearing her head enough for her to start thinking about how she could make some changes. She couldn’t think straight at home. Her head was always full of crap, of everyone else’s stuff. Where the kids had to be at what time, what they needed to have with them, what homework they had to do and by when. When George went away on a business trip, he even expected her to pack for him.
Food was a constant demand from everyone. She’d had no idea that growing boys would eat non-stop, and she was expected to prepare a meal at the drop of a hat if George brought a colleague home for dinner. Laundry was a huge chore; their washing machine and tumble dryer were constantly on.
And then there was the dog who she loved dearly, but who had been left to her despite the claims from the boys and George that they would share in everything if she allowed them to have a dog. The walks, the feeding, the shit shovelling, the wiping of muddy paws and the repetitiveness of every day was really getting her down.
She felt that in her family’s eyes she was only there to look after them. They never saw her as a person in her own right. She had been a complete fool over the last few years and it was time she made a stand.
She was determined she wouldn’t go back to that life. Time away hadn’t made her heart grow fonder, it had hardened her heart and, although she loved her family desperately, there were going to be some huge changes on the horizon that they weren’t going to like at all.
After carefully blow drying and then straightening her hair, and applying a slick of mascara to her false lashes, Olivia swept some blusher across her cheekbones to enhance the sun-kissed glow she already had from lying by the pool that day. She took a deep breath at the top of the stairs, and held her shoulders back. She could do this. And these wonderful ladies she was surrounded by right now might just be able to help her get back on the right track.
She looked as slim and effortlessly glamorous as always in a simple but beautifully cut black jumpsuit, which skimmed her in all of the right places adorned with some chunky silver jewellery.
Liv glanced across the room at Debs standing at the window, looking out, with a glass of red wine in her hands, and wished she could be more like Debs. Debs always seemed so confident in her own skin and, yes, she carried a little extra weight, but still looked stunningly gorgeous.
George was always quick to point out to Olivia when she’d put on a couple of extra pounds and suggest she spend a bit more time at the health and fitness club they were members of. Cheeky git, when he had that paunch lots of middle-aged men had that hung over the top of his trousers in a most unattractive manner; the belly that came from a few years of too much good food and drink. When she’d dared to suggest that he could maybe spend a bit more time in the actual gym rather than the clubhouse, he told her that he didn’t have all the time in the world to swan about all day like she did, and that his time in the clubhouse was business and therefore a necessity. Yeah, of course it was! He must think she was a fool to believe him.
Debs was staring out the window and hadn’t noticed Liv watching her. As always, Debs looked alluring and sexy. She had an air about her that Liv had never possessed in all her years. It was strange how some people had it, and some didn’t, and Debs had it in abundance. Debs had clearly been unhappy since she and Dave had split up, and she had seemed to have lost a little of her sparkle. Liv hoped that these few days away would help her friend get back her fizz.
It was strange how women were never happy with themselves, Liv mused. The way they were all envious of what others had, whether they were friends or not. Liv had always thought Debs was the prettiest of the group and she still was. Liv was striking, yes, she knew she was, but none of it was natural these days. There was nothing that couldn’t be enhanced or lifted or tucked at a price.
‘Hey, Debs, you’re looking very serious there!’
‘Ah, Liv. I was thinking what Dave would have thought of this villa. I know I shouldn’t be thinking about him, but after being together so long, it’s like my brain will never stop wondering about him and what he’d be thinking or doing if we were still together.’
She looked so sad. Liv walked towards her and rubbed her arm to comfort her.
‘I suppose it’s a habit that you have to try to break. It must be so hard after all those years. I can’t imagine how you must feel after what happened.’
‘I know he went off with PFP behind my back, and I should hate him, but I don’t, you know, Liv. You can’t suddenly hate someone you loved so much, just like that, can you? I just feel so bloody sad most of the time that our lives have come to this. I even wonder what I’d do if he told me he’d made a huge mistake and wanted to come back. I think I’d say yes, you know, and I’d try really hard this time to keep him happy. I could try harder to lose some weight. I know that’s something he’s not been happy with me for. And I’d make more of an effort with myself. Go out more often. Go on dates together. I’m sure we could get things back on track if PFP would just take her skinny little arse and fuck off out of the picture.’
Liv smiled. Debs always did have a way with words.
‘Well, I know there’s a very fine line between love and hate, Debs, but maybe it’s time to look forward now and not backwards. If you want to lose some weight, do it for you and not for anyone else. And if it does happen, then that’s great, but if it doesn’t, perhaps you need a plan B. Perhaps we just need to find you a new man. Someone to put a smile back on your gorgeous face.’
‘I know you’re right, Liv, but it’s just bloody hard. I literally have no one now and could you imagine going out dating again? Seriously? We never had kids because we were always enough for each other, but now I really regret it! I just want someone to need me.’
She picked up the bottle of red wine and refreshed her glass. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll snap out of it. I was just having a moment.’
‘And you are absolutely entitled to have a moment any time you like, and we’re all here to help you through this, Debs. It’s ridiculous though, isn’t it? I feel like my family need me way too much and can’t do anything for themselves. I wonder if we’re ever truly happy or if we’re constantly looking for something that doesn’t exist. Perhaps we all need to actually work out the things that really do make us happy and strive for them. Otherwise, if we never know what makes us happy, how are we ever going to reach that point? We’ll be constantly looking for something we won’t be able to recognise!’
‘Christ, that was profound. I think I need another drink after that little outburst!’
They laughed and Liv was pleased to see Debs smile again. She had looked so sad a few moments ago.
‘Anyway, is that footsteps I hear? The others must be joining us.’
Sixteen
Samantha realised she must have looked a bit gloomy when she came down.
‘What’s up, hon?’ Liv asked her. ‘Something happened?’
‘Nothing in particular. Oh, lots
of things at the same time. I tried to sleep but my brain wouldn’t shut off.’ She took a deep breath. ‘I didn’t know whether to say anything to you, but I’m driving myself bonkers. I’m so fed up with my life, girls. I rarely go out at home, and being here with you guys has made me realise how much I love having company and even getting ready to stay in, let alone go out. I live in my pyjamas or a pair of tatty old trackie bottoms at home because what’s the point of dressing up to stop in if no one is going to see me? Since Peter went to uni, I don’t think I’ve had a night out. Not even once that I can remember. I’ve realised that I put my life on hold for a long time for my family and now they’ve gone I have nothing. I spend my evenings surfing the internet, shopping on Amazon and spending money on things I really don’t need. It makes me happy for the split second when I buy it and then two minutes later I regret it.’
‘Get your notepad, Samantha. Let’s do some mind mapping and write down some ideas for you to get out and about. You should get yourself a dog, you know.’ Liv smiled. ‘I think Hector is my soul mate. I miss him more than my family, if truth be known.’ She looked round at her friends and they all looked really serious. ‘Only joking!’ She laughed, nervously fiddling with her necklace. ‘Or if you’re not sure about getting a dog of your own, perhaps you could put yourself up as a foster home. Loads of dogs need temporary homes, while they’re looking for the right one.’
‘I honestly don’t think I could do that, Liv. I’d get too attached to them and then wouldn’t want to give them away. It would be heart-breaking.’ She shook her head. ‘I do like the idea of having a dog though. A little pal of my own to chatter away to and to snuggle up with on the sofa of an evening.’
‘So, come on then. Shout up with ideas, everyone.’ Liv was bossy when she wanted to be. ‘Nothing too daft, let’s get all the ideas out and then we can go through each in more detail and see what suits. And I’m putting “get a dog” at the top.’