Elfshot

by M. H. Bonham

  Sure enough, the machine made a loud alarm, and as I was pulling on my shirt, several women, presumably nurses and doctors rushed in. Tuzren followed them, now in his normal size of about a foot and a half tall.

  “Sure know how to get everyone’s attention, Robert Ironspell-Cabas,” he said in typical demon-speak.

  “It’s Bob, remember?” I said. “Where the hell are we?”

  One of the woman with blonde hair and blue eyes—hell, they all had blonde hair and blue eyes—smirked as she waved the other women away. “What’s the last thing you remember, Bob?”

  “Dragging Elryn through the portal and I heard her scream. Oh god, did she get Elfshot? Is she all right? Can I see her?” I pulled on my shirt and jacket.

  The woman held up a finger and I fell silent. “She’s about as well as can be expected given the disease. But you, my friend, are a bit of an enigma.”

  I cocked my head. “Where am I?”

  “You are in Mengloth, the realm of Eir.” She her lips parted in a kind smile. “My realm.”

  I looked at Eir. She seemed unassuming, and yet there was something about her that set her apart from the other women I had seen there. “Eir? You mean like the goddess, Eir?”

  “The one in the same, pally,” Tuzren said with a grin.

  Whoa boy. I took a deep breath and wondered when the lightning bolts would hit. “I’m sorry, uh…miss?”

  The goddess smiled. “You can just call me Eir.”

  “Okay, um, Eir…Thanks for healing me…”

  “I didn’t heal you, although I did provide some basic support for your body. Your body healed itself.”

  “Okay.” The wheels turning slowly in my head. Damn, I needed coffee. “I healed myself?” I raised an eyebrow.

  “Yes, that surprised us, too.” Eir considered me with gimlet eyes. “Everyone else is doing worse, not better. Including Elryn.”

  “Elryn!” I gasped. “She did get hit by an Elfshot? But she’s an Elf.”

  Eir nodded. “She’s a Light Elf, not a Dark Elf. These Elfshot are genetically engineered to take out humans and Light Elves.”

  “Maybe we’re mistaken and I only thought I was hit with Elfshot. Maybe it was just a regular arrow.” I paused, seeing her expression. “No offense intended.

  “None taken,” she said. “I know what I healed—and you were Elfshot. You, Ironspell, are somehow immune to it.”

  I glanced at Tuzren, who shrugged. He was quietly listening instead of talking, possibly for the first time in his life. Maybe it had to do with the fact he was in the presence of a goddess. I looked for the Vorpal sword and my Glock. “What happened to my weapons?”

  “They’re in our armory. You’ll get them back when you leave here.”

  She inclined her head.

  “You said that Elryn is worse? And the others?” I felt a sense of dread wash over me.

  Eir shook her head. “The others are dying. The disease is severe.”

  “Duncan, too?”

  “He’s strong, but the disease is bad. It will kill him along with the others.” Eir shook her head. “I’ve seldom found a disease I can’t cure, but this one mutates in their bodies too fast.”

  “May I see Elryn and Duncan?” I said.

  She nodded. “You may. I’ll take you to them.”

  Duncan was in a room similar to mine, but he looked like death warmed over. Despite running a fever, his skin looked pale and mottled with black. He was on a respirator and had a myriad of medical machines around him. He looked unconscious. I turned back to Eir. “Will he live?”

  Eir didn’t meet my gaze. “I don’t know.”

  I looked at all the technology. “Somehow I thought your methods of healing would look different…”

  “And less like 21st century medical treatments?” she quirked an eyebrow. “You see what you are most familiar with. If a man from the 8th century were to walk in, he would see something totally different.”

  “So, what I’m seeing is an illusion?”

  “Not exactly. What you are seeing is what your mind interprets in a way that you can understand. You see what I see, but it is so alien to you that your mind supplies the analogies to cope with it. Trust me, for all intents and purposes, you are seeing the equivalent of 21st century medical equipment.”

  I nodded. “He looks awful.”

  “We’ve been trying to prevent the plague from going septic, but as you can see, we’ve had little success.”

  “Plague? You mean like Black Death?” I asked, not believing what I heard. “You mean like the disease that wasted a third of Europe in the Middle Ages?”

  “Precisely.” Eir nodded. “Normally even your medical community can treat plague with antibiotics, but this is a different form. The bacteria are resistant to antibiotics and even magical cures. It recognizes certain genomes and attacks those who have them. For some reason, you are immune.”

  I looked at her puzzled. “That’s strange. This is the second time I’ve shown resistance to Dark Elf magic.”

  “Oh?” The goddess looked at me with interest. “When was the first time?”

  “When we fought the Dark Elves, they unleashed their alchemical toxin on Earth, they grabbed my breathing mask. I had an asthma attack because of all the particulates, but they thought I had a heart attack like any human that came into contact with the toxin. I wasn’t affected by the toxin at all. I always assumed it was my mom’s ancestors. She comes from druid lines and I probably have Light Elf in me.”

  “That would not protect you against this plague.”

  “No, it wouldn’t.” I looked at her. “How is the family that we rescued?”

  Eir shook her head. “They’re in worse shape. The children have already died.”

  “Oh shit,” I said, bowing my head, before I realized I had just sworn in front of a goddess. “Sorry, I mean…”

  “No need to apologize.” She studied me for a moment. “I’d like to draw some samples of your DNA. Normally I would simply take them, but I feel that maybe I need your permission first to find what I am looking for.”

  “Will it help find a cure?”

  “It might.”

  “Then, go ahead.” I nodded. “I don’t want anyone else to die.”

  “Okay, then it’s done.” She inclined her head slightly.

  I stared at her. “That’s it? No swab or blood draw?”

  Eir smiled. “Of course not.”

  I laughed at my foolishness. My brain was still stuck in 21st century technology. “May I see Elryn?”

  “You may. Your little demon will be able to show you to her room. When you are done, come find me.” With that, she left.

  I turned to Tuzren. “You’re awfully quiet.”

  Tuzren flew to my shoulder and sat down. “She’s a very powerful goddess. I’m surprised she let me in here at all.”

  “Where is ‘here?’” I asked.

  “We’re in Lyfjaberg, which is a pocket dimension between Alfheim and Vanaheim,” he said. “She’s a healing goddess that the Light Elves learned their healing craft from. She isn’t just a healer for the Elves. She anyone who needs her help.”

  “Why are you surprised she let you in here?”

  Tuzren looked askance. “I’m a demon. My kind aren’t exactly welcomed in most places.”

  “I guess not,” I said. “It’s nice to see you back to your more normal size.”

  “Says you. I liked being big.”

  “When did you finally revert back?”

  Tuzren squinted as he thought. “Two, maybe three days ago.”

  “Oh shit! How long was I out?” I started to panic. We had left Luna and Salazar above ground. Right now, they’d be walking into a trap, if they hadn’t already.

  “Five days, but don’t worry. Time flows differently here. I thought about your two friends too. Eir assures me that when we go back, hardly any time will have passed.”

  I relaxed a little. “I was out for five days?”

 
; “Yeah, the Elfshot you got hit with also had poison. It was pretty gnarly stuff, but Eir figured out the antidote. It’s the new plague she’s having problems with.”

  “An arrow that carries both poison and disease.” I considered that insane thought.

  “Yeah, they really want humans dead.” The little demon scratched a horn. “I don’t get it—humans would welcome Dark Elves if they played nice.”

  “Light Elves wouldn’t,” I said, remembering how Elryn had killed two Drow in cold blood. “They kill their cousins on sight.” I paused. “So, how come you’re not in your own room with tubes hanging out? Last time I saw you, you were playing a Dark Elf pincushion.”

  Tuzren grinned. “I thought it looked quite fearsome. But have you ever heard of a demon with a cold?”

  “Well, no, but my experience with demons is pretty limited. So, you don’t get sick or poisoned?”

  Tuzren shook his head. “Those conditions are mortal conditions. Demons can ingest just about anything and we don’t get sick.”

  “So, your preoccupation with good food…?”

  “Hey, you could eat shit and survive too, but you don’t.”

  “Touché. Let’s see Elryn.”

  ~ * ~

  I walked down the hall until Tuzren told me to enter a room. There, we saw Elryn lying in a hospital bed, a spider web of diseased blackened skin ran across her face, neck, and arms. She had a sheet and blanket cover her body. Large buboes marked her neck where the pus and plague accumulated. Her hands were black—a sure sign she was suffering from septicemic plague. I had a feeling that it was only the goddess’s powers that kept her from death. But, she was dying at a rapid rate.

  “Oh, Elryn,” I said, feeling utterly helpless, looking down at her frail body. There wasn’t a spell or potion I could cook up from my wizardry magazines and texts that would save her. If a goddess couldn’t save her, what chance did I have?

  Elryn’s eyes opened and she met my gaze with her own glassy one. She moved her swollen and darkened lips a few times. “Iron…”

  “Shhh, save your strength.”

  She shook her head slightly. “No. Ironspell…not affected?”

  “No, Eir thinks there’s something in my genetic makeup. I gave her a sample to test.”

  She looked at me with her glazed stare. “You’re…one of…them.”

  “Hey, Elryn!” Tuzren said. “No, this is Ironspell. You know, the son of the mage whom you helped to close the Gateways?”

  “No, I…should have…known. Iron…spell.” She began coughing.

  “Easy, Elryn. Hang in there. We’ll find a way to save you.”

  A woman who looked like a doctor walked in. “You’d better go now. Eir wants to see you, and Elryn needs rest.”

  “Can you save her?” I asked, glancing back as Tuzren pulled me toward the door.

  “That’s what Eir wishes to talk to you about.”

  Chapter Seven

  Another woman, dressed in a white gown, led us to Eir’s throne room. Looking at her, I realized the woman was a Light Elf like Elryn, only her skin was fairer and her body thinner than Elryn. Looking at this Light Elf, I thought how delicate she was compared to Elryn, the warrior Elf.

  To say this Elf was gorgeous would be an understatement. Where Elryn was pretty, this woman looked like something an artist would draw—lithe, wispy, and ethereal. She looked more like she belonged in a china cabinet than alive and moving. She kept her long blonde hair loose and it flowed around her, past her waist like a cape. She was so alien looking, it was hard to believe she and Elryn were the same race.

  We walked down the long hall of the hospital; then the corridor morphed into a different passage. We were no longer in the hospital with patient doors on either side. Instead, we were walking through a portico with white trees as columns. Their leafy boughs made a roof over our heads. It was night, although light filled the portico from lanterns hanging from the branches. A large pool lay to the pathway’s right and reflected the stars and three moons in the sky. The moons were small by comparison to the Moon on Earth, being in the gibbous phase. I stopped and stared at the sky in sheer wonder. I had been on another planet when I had traveled to the Dark Elves’ home world, but the enormity didn’t strike me then as it did now. I didn’t think about the Drow’s world largely because so many of them were trying to kill me. Go figure.

  The Light Elf touched my arm gently to bring me back to the present. “Come, Eir is waiting for you.”

  I looked at her. “What is your name?”

  She smiled. “You may call me Allynna.”

  “Allynna,” I repeated. “That’s a pretty name.”

  “Thank you. Eir is waiting.” She continued to walk down the path and motioned me and the demon to follow.

  I caught up with her. “This is a beautiful land. Do you live here?”

  “Yes, I do.” Allynna smiled again. “We love it here and Eir is so beneficent. It is hard to imagine living in another world.”

  “Is all of Lyfjaberg like this?”

  Allynna nodded. “We are on top of one of the mountains here. Although it would normally be cold, Eir keeps our temperatures mild and our weather pleasant. If you were to leave Mengloth by foot, you would walk into a frozen mountain range which isn’t very hospitable. But our portals make it easy to go where we need to both on this world and to other worlds.”

  I glanced at her intrigued. “You have a portal to my world?”

  “Of course. We have portals to nearly every world, though some are kept secret because of the nature of the denizens.”

  “Like the Drow.” I could imagine the Drow being terribly upset with Light Elves showing up on their doorstep.

  She considered me for a moment, looking askance. “The Drow would be the least of our concerns. There are creatures which are incredibly dangerous which dwell in the other eight worlds.”

  “That’s true,” said Tuzren, speaking up for the first time in a while. I would’ve forgotten he was there except for the ever-present weight on my shoulder. “There are universes within the multiverse that have creatures even demons wouldn’t tackle.”

  I was going to ask more about that when we approached a door that seemed to appear out of thin air. The portico ended at the door, but I could see nothing around or behind the door save the mountain ranges and the dark sky lit up brilliantly with the thousands of stars. Allynna opened the door and stepped through. It seemed that she disappeared into nothing but the backdrop of stars.

  I glanced at Tuzren. “Another Gateway?”

  “It would seem so.” The demon nodded.

  “With all these portals, have you thought to ask Eir about getting home? If what Allynna says is true, they probably have a portal directly to your dimension.”

  “Yeah, well,” Tuzren hedged. “Eir offered it to me while you were out. I declined.”

  “You declined? I thought you wanted to go back.”

  “Yeah, well, I thought I did too. To be honest with you, I really like staying on Earth now that I have digs. And these past two weeks have been the most interesting I’ve ever had.” He paused. “Plus there’s no Beau Jo’s pizza in my dimension. And I kind of like being able to grow bigger.”

  “Uh huh.”

  “And I now have friends here. I’ve never had friends before.” The little demon’s face flushed red with the admission. “Nobody in my plane has treated me as kindly as you and your friends.”

  I felt a lump in my throat. “Seriously?” I croaked out. “Dude, I am so not giving you a hug.”

  “No, that would violate man-law,” the demon agreed.

  I stepped through the doorway, feeling a mild zap like static electricity.

  Suddenly I was no longer outside Mengloth but instead stood in what looked like a giant Viking mead hall. The chamber was rectangular with a giant fire pit in the middle. A fire blazed in the pit, and I could feel the warmth of it even from where we stood. Benches surrounded the fire pit with warriors, both men an
d women, Human and Elven, dressed in what looked to me to be Norse or Saxon clothing. They were brightly colored but simple in design: tunics, bloused trews, and laces that ran up the lower leg and tied at the top. They were talking as servants brought mead cups and poured more mead in each of the warrior’s cups. Other warriors were standing on the outside of the benches where there was the only path to the other side of the room.

  On the far side of the fire pit was a throne with a woman sitting on it. I recognized Eir immediately, but she looked so spectacularly beautiful, I stared at her in wonder. She made Allynna look plain.

  “Follow me and do as I do,” Allynna said. I nodded, wondering what sort of protocol was required in the hall of a goddess.

  As we walked toward Eir, the crowd of warriors parted. Many nodded their greeting to Allynna and us and Allynna acknowledged them with her own head nod. I did the same, figuring whomever they were, they deserved as much respect. When we approached the throne, Allynna bowed deeply to Eir. I did likewise and that was the only time Tuzren took to the air before settling back on my shoulder.

  “Mistress Eir,” Allynna said. “I have brought you Ironspell.”

  “Thank you. You are excused.” The goddess nodded to the Light Elf. Allynna bowed again and joined the other warriors, taking a cup of mead.

  Eir turned to me. “Robert Ironspell-Cabas, you are indeed a surprise. First, you defeat Vindar’s forces on his home planet. Then, you are Elfshot and you survive it and the plague. Do you know why that is?”

  “I thought it had something to do with Light Elf ancestry, but it clearly doesn’t.”

  Eir shook her head. “No, but it does have to do with Dark Elf ancestry.”

  I stared at the goddess in shock. “That can’t be. You must be mistaken.”