Orc Glitch- The Mad King

by KJ Harlow

  “Best to get this done and out of the way.” Doctor Tran abruptly stood up, turned to the window and waved the police in. Without a backward glance, he squeezed past the pigs as they filed in, ready to make the next hour of his Cal's hell. Bastard.

  The fork clattered against the plate. Hospital food was the worst. Still, if there was anything that worked up an appetite, it was answering the same, damn questions over and over again.

  “I’m sorry, but visiting hours are over…”

  “10 minutes and I'll be outta here.”

  The door burst open. A woman wearing jeans and a black t-shirt with Deadpool spreading his ass cheeks open on it barged in, a brown, paper bag under her right arm.

  “Eyre,” Cal breathed.

  She plonked herself down in the lumpy seat next to his bed. As she slid the paper bag onto the table, Cal breathed in the scent of mayonnaise and peaches. “Sounds like you’re actually happy to see me,” she quipped.

  “After you’ve been interrogated by the cops for an hour, even talking to you is bearable.” In a blink her hand was in the air, ready to karate chop down onto his arm. Cal flinched and she caught sight of the cast. She slowly put her hand back down on her lap.

  “Tell me what happened.” Her voice softened.

  “Eyre…” Cal rolled his eyes, landing on his cast. She stared at him, her eyes boring deeper and deeper into him. “OK fine.”

  She tilted her head back just a touch, her mouth quirking up at the corner. She only did that when she knew that she had won an argument with Cal. “Hold up.” She swivelled in her seat, taking off her back pack. Her ponytail swung like a pendulum as she bent down and dropped it onto the floor. Streaks of blonde regrowth broke through her chestnut hair.

  “Just tell me what happened before you were taken to the hospital.”

  Cal opened his mouth then furrowed his eyebrows. “Wait… how did you know I had been taken to hospital?” He sat up, inching away from Erika. “How did you know where I was?”

  Erika heaved a sigh. “Poor, naive Callahan,” she said, shaking her head in mock sympathy. “Work at Moon Macrosystems must be really killing off your brain cells.”

  “You have no idea.”

  “Well… let’s see now.” She raised a hand, pointing at her thumb. “I know where your office is. I know what time you clock off. I know you like taking short cuts. I also know the alleyways from the city back to Condor Street pretty well.” There was that confident tilt of the head again. “Don’t forget that you moved into my hood, not the other way around.” Cal snorted but kept his eyes transfixed on Eyre. Her voice was giving him something to focus on other than his pain.

  “So after you hung up on me, I was back on burger duty. Right in the middle of making a triple cheeseburger I just left. Just like that. Pulled my gloves off, pulled my apron off, stuffed them into my bag then I was out the door.” Her mischievous eyes faded when she saw Cal’s WTF look. “Oh it’s no big deal. I told my manager I had gastro. Anyway, I half ran, half jogged towards MM. Stood outside then visualized where you went. 10 minutes later, BINGO!” Her thunderclap made Cal blink. “Ambulances, police, gawkers. Didn’t see you, but hung around long enough to hear that a guy in a wheelchair had been knocked. The. Fuck. Out.”

  Cal nodded slowly. “And here you are.”

  Erika leaned back, her smile of satisfaction tempered by concern filtering through her verdant eyes. “Your turn.”

  Cal proceeded to tell Erika everything that happened from the moment he hung up on her until his head lost a battle with an empty beer bottle. She had that triumphant head tilt by the time he finished, but he just ignored her. “I swear, Doctor Tran is behind the scenes, pulling the strings. He knows I haven’t been back here since…”

  He glanced up at Erika. She didn’t turn away, the concern now etched in her dimples. Concern was fine. It was the sympathy he couldn’t deal with.

  “Since your mom died.” Cal felt like a cannon ball had been shot point blank into his gut. He held Erika’s gaze and realized a clock had been ticking above the door the entire time.

  “Shittest birthday present ever,” Cal said. The joke fell flat, just like his attempt at a laugh, which sounded like a cross between a squeak and a croak.

  “Do you still think about her?” Erika asked.

  “I don’t know Eyre, you tell me.” Cal snapped. “If you had Muscular Dystrophy and your dad walked out on you as a kid, then had to watch your mom literally work herself to death just to make sure that you could afford treatment for a disease that robbed you of your ability to walk, would you think about her?”

  “I’m sorry, Cal, I didn’t…”

  “Nurse!” Cal jammed down on the red button by his bed. Seconds later, a middle-aged woman, with chubby cheeks and pink scrubs shuffled in.

  Erika looked at Cal a moment longer before scooping up her bag. “Rest up, Cal.” The nurse kept her eyes on her the entire time as she and her ponytail bounced out of the room. Erika stopped in the doorway. “Happy birthday.” The smell of mayonnaise and peaches was gone.

  Dear Dipshit,

  I know this letter is messy. Deal with it. I wrote it in the hospital lobby.

  I know it’s your birthday, but I’m going to pretend that it’s mine because I want to. That means I get 3 birthday wishes. Yeah, because I said so.

  1. I wish that you would stop doing stupid shit, like getting into fights with people. I don’t even know what happened to you yet, but I’ve just got a feeling it involves you picking on people twice your size. That’s how we met, remember? When you could still walk? Some dumb ass kid from down the road pushed me over. Then 6-year-old you rushes in all like, “I’m gonna kill you!” Then he drops you, you cry like a little bitch and I had to door knock with you until we found your mom. Yeah… I’m never going to let you live that down.

  2. Speaking of walking, I wish that you would at least try. MD’s your disease, but don’t think that I haven’t Googled it. I know you’ll lose more motor function over time. I know that you’ve got a short life expectancy. I know that there’s no cure. But don’t act like there’s no hope. Scientists have been working on it. Someone could find the cure for it tomorrow. When it’s ready, think about fast your recovery will be when you’ve gotten a head start by keeping those malnourished drumsticks moving.

  3. Finally, I wish that you would be honest with yourself. Moon Macrosystems is what, job #5 in the last three years? You tell yourself that companies are lining up to hire you because you’re in a wheelchair, but is that any way to live? The Cal that I grew up with hated being defined by his condition. “I’ll be dead in 10 years Eyre, what’s the point?” So you keep reminding me. But answer me this: if there really wasn’t a point, why did you “save” me all those years ago? Why do you keep getting into fights? I’ll tell you why: because it FULFILS you. Maybe you want to be a hero, I don’t know (if you were, your name would be SUPER RETARD). I do know that being a monkey chained to a desk is never going to make you happy.

  Ooops written another essay. I’m going to wrap this up while you unwrap your gift (see what I did there? Hehe). It’s not the cure for MD, but it’ll get you back on your feet in other ways. Costed me an arm and a leg too so if you break it, I will break you.

  Douchette xo

  Cal folded up the letter and put it back in the paper bag. He eyed the clock. 11:48; she’d be in bed now.

  “Remind me to call Erika tomorrow at 9 am.” His smartwatch chimed in acknowledgement. He laid the paper bag onto his thighs, reached in with both hands and slid a box out. Wait, this is...

  Two green “V’s” in Gothic font emblazoned the box. Is this the ValorVania VMMORPG that’s been hyped up all over the Internet? The one reviewers said boasted a surreal level of immersion, almost as if you were transported to another world?

  Cal broke the holographic seal on the box and pulled the headset out. It was jet black and had a lime-green, transparent visor. Cal rapped his fingernail against it. Glass, not p
lastic. Nice.

  He pressed the “ON” button on the side and the headset hummed to life. He turned it around. Tiny, green words appeared on the inside of the visor:

  Put the Sol headset on to sync IdentiChip.

  He turned it around the right way and brought the headset down on top of his head. Jiggling it until it was snug, there was a blip as a built-in scanner read the chip embedded into his head the day that he was born.

  Welcome, Callahan Rogers.

  To start the game, say, “Enter ValorVale” clearly.

  Cal’s heart beat twice as fast as the cursor on the visor blinked. He licked his lips and cleared his throat.

  “Enter ValorVale.”

  2

  Walk & Orc

  The remaining feeling in Cal’s legs disappeared first. Like numbing quicksand, he lost feeling in his entire body. All that remained was his awareness, floating in an endless grey. Seconds later, a green prompt appeared.

  Callahan, welcome to ValorVale, the world’s first fully immersive Virtual Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game (VMMORPG)!

  You will join the human race, push back the scourges of monsters with weapons and craft, befriend native tribes and train your fighter to be the strongest in all of Terrafaytum.

  Alright, alright, let’s get into it already. The green prompt faded away. A yellow prompt bounced up, filling the entire screen:

  WARNING!

  IdentiChip #0210172011 may have altered functionality in ValorVale. Do you wish to continue?

  YES | NO

  ‘Altered functionality’? A faint outline of a triangular cursor hovered over the ‘NO’. Not like I can do anything about it. He looked at the ‘YES’ and the cursor followed. “Yes,” Cal uttered. The prompt disappeared. A spark giving off faint puffs of light followed a circular groove in the middle of the space.

  Gong…

  There was a chime, like a bell in a village clock tower a hundred yards away. The spark disappeared and the greyness faded to black.

  20,155th Cycle

  1-Sibelle

  A cool breeze sighed over the plain. Blades of tender grass swayed in unison, ushering hushed whispers of welcome eastward. Cal lay there, watching pearls of light form in a circle all around him, eventually breaking off and dripping upwards towards the heavens. Seconds later, all the light was gone.

  That was a lie; there was actually a lot of light. Four gargantuan moons hung in the sky, gazing down at the newest arrival. Cal propped himself up on his elbows and stared at the biggest one. It was heavy and round, casting an earthy, warm glow over the plain. A pink-red moon peeked out from behind it, about half in size. The one behind that one was milky-white, most similar to Earth’s moon while the one behind that one was sky-blue and the smallest of them all. All four were full.

  Cal inhaled and held his breath. Closing his eyes, he let another zephyr wash over him. He smiled. No bullshit from idiotic customers. No George. No…

  He opened his eyes and looked at his outstretched legs. Simple boots made out of some kind of dense hide covered his feet while roughly hewn trousers were hitched to his waist with a thin piece of rope. That’s the best the devs could do?

  He exhaled. OK, let’s see how immersive ValorVale really is. Concentrating on his left foot, he slowly twisted it until the top of his boot grazed the ground. Sweet! He did the same thing with his right foot. So far so good. He wriggled his toes inside his boots. “Awww yes!” A guttural, throaty voice escaped his lips.

  Cal clapped his hands over his mouth. Holy shit, what’s with my hands? Wiry hairs erupted in random tufts along the back while slivers of skin peeled from his sandpaper palms. He raised his hands, bewilderment etched on his face as he observed his chipped and jagged fingernails. ‘Altered functionality’, huh? More like gangrene.

  OK, moment of truth. Ignoring his ugly digits, he drew his knees up and placed his feet flat on the ground. In one swift movement, he pushed off the ground into a squat. The tendrils of grass fell still, collectively holding their breath. Slowly, he stood up.

  Holy shit… wooooo! He yelled and an otherworldly cry of triumph made the grass shiver. The plain he stood on seemed to expand for several hundred yards behind him, as well as to his east and west. About 50 yards in front, he could see a gleaming expanse. Cal took one tentative step, followed by another. By now, he had forgotten the strangeness of his voice as his baby steps in this new world turned into a canter then into a full-blown sprint.

  Man, forget befriending villagers and fighting monsters. I can run again! The liquid rippled in front of him, the moons reflected on its surface. As he approached it, he realised how thirsty he felt. They weren’t kidding when they said this game was completely immersive. Cal stopped by the surface and observed the lake-sized body of liquid and a notification popped up:

  Unlike the water on Earth, ValorVale’s water is completely reflective, like mercury. It is 100% safe to drink. Just beware of monsters lurking beneath!

  Gong! There was that clock tower bell chiming again.

  You have learned Examine! By focusing on different things, information can make itself known to you. Try it on friends, foes, living and inanimate objects. This is one of several Abilities in Terrafaytum, which you have to discover for yourself. How many can you find? Note: Abilities cannot be levelled up.

  Cal fell to his knees and shuffled closer to the edge of the body of water. Just as he went to scoop up some of the brilliant liquid to his face, he could see something rippling above his head:

  Mercat Lake

  The gothic text shimmered in the air for three seconds before dissolving. Mercat? What were they, like the pets of Mermen or something? Cal put his hands on the ground and peered into the water. A dark-green angular face with finger-length tusks curled out either side of his mouth greeted him. Beady, amethyst eyes smouldering in their sockets glared back at him.

  Aaaargh! Cal threw himself back. Why were Mercats so damn ugly? Cal sat on the grass, collecting himself for a moment. Wait a sec… ‘ValorVale’s water is completely reflective, like mercury.’ Cal got back onto his knees and edged closer to the lake again. That wasn’t a Mercat, that was…

  He flinched as he caught another eyeful of the putrid creature that stared back at him. He brought his dark, mottled hands to his face and touched his left tusk. His right hand stroked the wafty, black beard that flowed from his chin, extending all around his head. He was completely bald, save for a braided ponytail that extended out the back of his head. Last time I checked, humans didn’t look like this. He slapped his hand into the surface of the lake. Plunging his hands into the water he scrubbed every finger carefully. The shining water clung to his skin as he observed his hands under the moonlight. Nope, still ugly.

  In the corner of his vision, a small cross pulsed with a “1” in a circle in its top right. Concentrating on it, a green, transparent screen expanded left then down, blurring his view of the resplendent lake:

  Great job! That’s how you view notifications in ValorVale. Whenever see a number next to the cross, simply focus on it and it will expand open. Bear in mind that your in-game experience doesn’t pause, so pick your time and place to do this wisely!

  Let’s have a look at your Status Screen for the first time. To view it, simply say, ‘Status Screen’.

  “Status Screen.”

  The notification screen minimized back to the top right before a new screen appeared. Cal was drawn to the rotating figure on the right. Based on the ugly ass face, he could see that it was him. On the left were several lines:

  NAME: Callahan Rogers

  AGE: 29 (Earth)

  CLASS: Orc Fighter

  LVL: 5

  HP: 100/100

  MP: 100/100

  AFF: Earth (x30)

  STR: 10

  DEF: 10

  AGL: 10

  INT: 10

  ABILITY: Examine

  SKILL: NIL

  WEAPON: Axe – Level E – Next Level in 99%

  �
�Orc Fighter’? That would explain the crime against nature that stared back at him in the lake. Cal fingered his tusks absent-mindedly while poring over the screens. Troubleshooting, troubleshooting, troubleshooting…

  He paused. Was this Erika’s idea of a joke? A way to get back at him? As far as he knew, she didn’t moonlight as a hacker. Maybe she had friends in high places. Cal sighed. Whatever. No skin off my teeth… or tusks. Cal looked back at the cross, the status screen disappeared and the landscape around him came back into focus.

  Wait, it said that I had an… ow! Cal looked down to his left hip, bringing his hand down to it at the same time. He nicked his thumb on the corner of a small axe that dangled from its holster. Well, they did say it was ‘fully immersive’.

  -1 Damage!

  The red prompt floated up in his line of vision before disappearing. He sucked his thumb and reached around his body with his right hand to slowly draw the hatchet out. It was blunt on one side and sharpened on the other. Good for cutting branches but not much else.

  Cal sheathed his weapon and put his hands on his hips. The grass continued to bend and sway in the wind while the water rippled. I wonder if there’s a map. Cal brought up his notification screen but there were no new messages. He flipped back to his status screen but besides the drop in health, there was nothing else. He did notice a settings page that had an ‘Exit’ button, but he closed the page.

  This lake can’t go on forever, right? Cal started walking to his right along the perimeter of the lake. He closed his eyes and sighed as another breeze blew at his back. How’s the serenity… wait, what’s that? 50 yards in front, he could see something bending back and forth. He drew his axe and got down into a half crouch, the grass brushing against his legs as he crept towards it. 20 yards away, he slowly stood up. Were those… dandelions?