Tell Me Why It's Wrong

by B. Celeste

  “Don’t chicken out,” she throws at me, eyes narrowing. Her pink painted lips are pinched as she scowls. “As soon as I read your message I had to make sure you weren’t stroking. Marriage, Rylee? What’s going on? Where are you right now?”

  I try to explain, but the words get clogged in my throat. Closing my eyes, I take a deep breath and do my best to tell her what’s been happening. “You’re not going to be happy.”

  When I open my eyes again, I see wariness enter her facial features, but she doesn’t say a word.

  “For the record, this wasn’t my idea. It was proposed to me—” I wince at the word choice. It’s not how I thought I’d be proposed to, and part of my heart is crushed knowing I’d dreamt of this exact moment only to accept I’ll never get one like it again. Not a first, but not a last either. “The person in question thinks it’ll be a good idea for the both of us, and he’s offering me the help I need to make ends meet. It’s…”

  I shrug, not knowing what to say other than, “It’s not ideal. It isn’t what I thought I’d get, but it’s something I’m seriously considering. This could help me in a lot of ways, even if the arrangement ends.”

  It takes her a few long moments before she blinks. “Arrangement? This is what? An arranged marriage? Do you even know anything about this guy? Who is he? How’d you meet? Have you even—”

  “You’re not going to believe it.”

  She deadpans. “I’ve watched you do questionable things all our lives, Rylee. There’s not a lot I wouldn’t believe you’d get involved in. In fact, I don’t know why any of this surprises me.”

  Ouch. “That’s not fair.”

  “What’s not fair is you clearly lying about where you’ve been for the past who knows how long. What’s unfair is that you obviously don’t trust me considering I’m only now just hearing about you getting married and acting like it’s a job opportunity.”

  It isn’t often Moffie gets angry with me. We’ve had our disagreements, but it’s not anything we’ve ever gotten too heated over. Minus the time we didn’t talk for an entire day because we didn’t agree on who Hermione should have wound up with in Harry Potter. Since she read the books and I haven’t, she still feels Draco Malfoy is the better option.

  “I see your point,” I finally reply, ignoring the ache in my chest. “But I didn’t keep anything from you on purpose. You know me, Moff. I wanted to figure things out on my own. And I’m telling you now, asking you for advice, because I trust you. I need help because I’m freaking out here.”

  I can tell she wants to stay angry, but when her shoulders drop a fraction I know she’s relenting. Like Garrick, she doesn’t let herself get lost in the negative feelings. Curiosity gets the better of her. “Fine. Who is this guy?”

  My lips press together in a firm line for a moment before I sigh. “It’s Garrick Matthews.”

  She stares.

  I nod slowly. “Sarina wanted me to do a piece on him and then all of a sudden he’s right there helping me at the stupid club when my car broke down, and now I’m at his house—”

  “You’re at Garrick Matthews’ house?” Her voice is no more than a high-pitched squeal, and I’m thankful that none of her elementary students would know who that even is. Their mothers…sure.

  I wince, rubbing my ear. “Yes.”

  Her head shakes in disbelief, despite her insistence that I wouldn’t be able to surprise her anymore since I’ve obviously made plenty of questionable choices in the past. “Is this the same Garrick Matthews of Violet Wonders? Or like one of those Hollywood lookalikes who get paid because they resemble famous people?”

  “It’s him, Moff. Actually him.”

  She blinks a few times before looking away, her hands coming up to brush her frizzy curls away from her face. When she stares back at the screen, there’s wonder replacing any irritation she had over me and my predicament. “I feel like you’re about to tell me this is all a joke and I’m freaking out for nothing, but wherever you are is way too swanky to be a Motel 6, and you’re doing that thing with your nose that you always do when you’re stressed.”

  “What thing with my nose?”

  She taps hers. “You scrunch it.”

  “I do not!” Hand flying to my nose, I realize it’s doing exactly what she says. “Oh my God. How long have I had that tell?”

  Moffie snorts. “Since forever. How do you think your parents always knew when you lied to them about something?”

  “I just thought I was a terrible liar.”

  She shrugs. “That too.”

  I frown. “We’re getting off topic here.”

  She sighs heavily. “You’re right. We’re supposed to be talking how you somehow got tangled up with Garrick-frigging-Matthews. Are his eyes really that blue? Have you seen him naked? Have you slept with him? Oh my God! If you did, you need to tell me every single detail. I need to live vicariously through you because I’ve read he’s a total freak in bed.”

  I’m so glad I’m the only one here, because there’s no way Yasmin couldn’t hear this if she were still cleaning.

  “Does he know you love The Wild more than his band? Has he seen your screenname before? I mean, your username is literally CannonIsMine. Not Garrick. You had posters of Cannon Rhodes on your bedroom wall for years.”

  The Wild is a band that started a little before Violet Wonders formed and has killed it from day one. I still listen to them religiously and run to the app store every time a new song drops to download it. Moffie teases me for following some of the band members on social media, but she’s no different with her favorite celebrities. Including the man I’m staying with.

  And as for Garrick… “We haven’t really sat down to talk about that sort of thing. And, no, we didn’t sleep together. You know I’m not like that, I can’t believe you’d ask.”

  “Okay, first, you’re the one who was dead set on losing your virginity before you graduated high school. And then you were determined to make it happen before 21, and we both know how that turned out. Don’t get all prude-like on me now that you’ve found the exact guy you’ve been looking for who can teach you a thing or two.”

  How does she even hold that over my head knowing we have the same body count when it comes to sex? “Can you not bring that up? I was young and stupid. Everyone made sex seem like such a big deal back then.”

  “It is a big deal. I’ve told you that a billion times and you still went to some random dude to get the job done like you were paying a contractor to do reno work for a day.”

  I squeeze my eyes closed. “Let’s not talk about that.”

  “Fine. I’ll move on to my second point. How come you haven’t told the man who asked you to marry him that you’re obsessed with his competition?”

  I groan. “It’s not like it’s a big deal. And I’m not as obsessed as I used to be. Working here and writings stories on people has made me realize that celebrities are people too.”

  She gapes. “You mean the people you write bad stories about? The ones who have human feelings that you rip into for a quick buck?”

  “Not you too. You’re supposed to be on my side!”

  “Oh, so Garrick knows about that?”

  “Yes.”

  “And how does he feel?”

  “How do you think?” I quip.

  She hums. “You want my honest opinion? Are you sure, Rylee?”

  This can’t be good.

  “For as long as I can remember, we’ve talked about our future husbands. Who they’d be, what they’d do, where we’d live together with them. You and I always dreamed of being neighbors and raising our families next door to each other. You never wanted this.” I go to speak, but she cuts me off. “Let me finish. You need to hear this. All these years, you’ve closed yourself off from dating or being near a guy because of your health or your job or some other excuse, and I’ve seen what it’s done to you. You’re lonely, Ry. You’re not happy. You’re being drained by trying to make ends meet, so you’ll never get
the dream life you’ve wanted if you keep running yourself ragged.”

  I blink. She’s not really suggesting…?

  My best friend offers me a soft smile. “I think you should do it.”

  I must have heard her wrong. “What?”

  Her chin dips once in confirmation. “I think you should take him up on his offer. If he can help you out, then say yes. You deserve to let someone take the pressure off your shoulders.”

  “But we’ve always talked about finding true love. You have Eli and you’re happy—”

  “I’m not saying you have to fall in love with Garrick,” she says plainly. “But maybe he’ll be good practice for the real deal. He can take the edge off and help you live a little because you’ve spent years only existing. Living paycheck to paycheck, stressing out over if you can afford this or that. He’s rich. He’s willing to help. It seems kind of like a no brainer. You’re not me and Garrick certainly isn’t Eli, you can do whatever you want, Ry.”

  I can’t believe this. “I thought you’d talk me out of it.”

  “I know. You always seek me out when you want me to shoot you down because you need somebody to agree that you’re making stupid choices. If you really wanted to be talked out of it you would have called your mom. But Garrick Matthews is…Garrick Matthews. I mean if Grandma Birdie were around she’d be cheering you on with pom-poms. It’s not like he’s some 90-year-old you have to bathe and push around in a wheelchair. This could be fun for you. You’re not your parents, you’ve never believed in the same things they did, so live your life the way you want to and don’t worry about the things they always preached.”

  Still in shock, I shake my head. I thought Moffie believed in the whole only-marry-once thing too. The way she talked, she didn’t believe in divorce or anything else either. “Are you just saying this because you’re a fan?”

  She grins. “Maybe. I’ve got enough time saved up that I could make a trip out to see you and the eye candy you locked down. Eli wouldn’t understand, but he’d still come support you no matter what. You’re family.”

  I huff out a laugh, knowing she’s right. There’s nothing Eli wouldn’t do if it makes Moffie happy. And I want that someday too.

  “And maybe Garrick knows Cannon,” she adds nonchalantly.

  I glare at her, not finding her as funny as she thinks she is.

  She giggles. “I’m just saying, this could be really good for you, girl. I forgive you for not telling me sooner, but now I’m invested.”

  Great.

  “So, what are you going to do?” she asks.

  It isn’t until much later, long after we hang up when she had to stop one of her kids from drinking paint, that I walk downstairs when Garrick gets home. My hands are twisted together, my heart racing rapidly, my forehead dotted with anxious sweat as he looks up when I approach him.

  He’s in the kitchen getting dinner ready, something with herbs and spices from the smell, when I blurt, “I’ll do it.”

  He stares with raised brows.

  I stare with nervous eyes.

  And Garrick says, “Okay.”

  11

  Rylee

  My heart is beating so hard that it vibrates my ears with every step I take alongside the man in a silk blue button-up and black dress pants. My eyes are glued to the shining polish of his dress shoes, which the florescent lights reflect off of as we walk. My lackluster flats and dress don’t compare to the material sophistication wrapped around his lean yet toned body.

  Garrick tried offering me money to buy anything I wanted for the occasion—a new dress, shoes, anything to make me more comfortable. But instead of accepting the cash he’d handed me, I decided to don my best white summer dress that I haven’t worn in years that was a little too short and a pinch too tight, and my best pair of ballet flats. My hair is down and curled to the best of my ability, and I put makeup on that hides the dark circles under my eyes so nobody can see how little I’ve slept since agreeing to this.

  Getting married.

  Getting married to Garrick Matthews.

  I wish my parents were here. Moffie. My grandparents. By the time I said ‘yes’ Garrick told me he’d get something set up two days from then. Forty-eight hours. Not a lot of time to plan a wedding, yet plenty of time to talk myself out of it and then back in again.

  The deciding factor was the updated e-statement I got online for my monthly medication costs. A number that made me cry myself to sleep the night after I agreed to walk into this courthouse. There’d been a soft knock at the bedroom door before I’d drifted off, but I pretended not to hear it. Whoever was behind it thought better to leave me be.

  Nausea settles into the pit of my stomach as the arm wrapped tenderly around mine stops us in front of the judge appointed to cement our fate with pretty words and dried ink.

  Chase is standing off to the side, looking as dressed up as his older brother in a maroon shirt and gray slacks, watching the two of us with indifference.

  When Garrick told him our plan, he hadn’t said anything for a long time. He studied both of us with a close eye, glanced back at his brother, and said, “Mom is going to kill you.”

  I’d froze.

  Garrick chuckled.

  Chase agreed to be our witness.

  Here we are.

  It isn’t until we’re almost done repeating our vows, which I stumble over making Garrick’s blue eyes light up with humor and even Chase fight a secretive smile, that I realize what comes next.

  When Judge Jenson says those six words that has my body locking, I try not to suck in a breath when the Australian in front of me steps closer until our shoes touch. One of his hands gently cups my cheek, his eyes seeking silent permission to kiss me, and I know I can’t say no.

  Giving him a barely-there nod, he leans down and closes the gap between us. I swallow my startled breath when his pillowy lips brush against mine, not demanding more than a tender kiss for show. Blood rushes to my face when he pecks my bottom lip, then the top one, and finally both of them together before drawing back enough to graze his nose along my cheek and caress my parted lips with his warm breath.

  My heart drums wildly as I run my tongue across my lips and try fighting the blush when his eyes watch me closely, noticing every little movement I make in awareness of his body right there towering over mine.

  I take a step back with a shy smile, and with a safe distance between us again, the judge completes the ceremony looking about as pleased as he can be for two strangers. “I hope you two always find happiness with one another. Congratulations.”

  The words strike me, a blow right to the heart, and Garrick must see the panic in my face. He takes my arm and places it on his, guiding me back out so Judge Jenson won’t see whatever mood I’m radiating. I can hear Chase follow behind us until we’re outside the judge’s quarters, and that’s when the reality of what I just did sinks in.

  Oh my God, I’m married.

  It isn’t until I know we’re clear before I let out a tiny breath that relieves some of the burning in my lungs, but the hyperawareness and unreadable emotion is still packed inside my chest cavity, imploding by the second.

  It’s Chase who says, “There’s a car waiting out back for you two. I’ll go out the front to make sure nobody got tipped off.”

  My eyes go between them. “You think someone would do that?” They both stare at me with brows raised as if I’m ridiculous for asking that. When I realize they’re right, I blush deeper than I already was. “Stupid question. I’ll shut up now.”

  Chase tries to hide a smile, but I see the way his lips curl slightly at the corners. He and Garrick may not be blood related, but they have the same mannerisms. His older brother just doesn’t hide his amusement as well.

  Garrick puts a hand on the small of my back and gestures for me to walk down the same narrow hallway that leads to the back doors we came in. We’re quiet for a few moments before he says, “Breathe, Rylee.” His hand puts more pressure on my back, gently
soothing me. “Are you okay?”

  When I was little, I figured my wedding day would be the happiest day of my life. My father would tear up when he saw me, and let a tear shed when he put my hand in my future husband’s to officially give me away, and my family would watch with tender smiles as I said ‘I do’ to the love of my life.

  Instead, I can’t sort through the wide variety of emotions all swirling around in my head. There’s fear, regret, and panic, and deep down, contentment, hope, and faith that everything will work out how it should. But not even that little faith eases any of the guilt over my family not being there.

  Relaying that information to Garrick is near impossible in the moment, so I remain silent until I can express myself with words instead of emotions.

  Not pushing the matter, he stops us by the door and squeezes my shoulder. “This is going to work for the both of us, Rylee. Everything will be okay.”

  I inhale slowly, lifting my eyes to his and see the sincerity staring back. We don’t move, don’t say a word, as we watch each other in the silence of the building.

  It isn’t until his chin dips once, his hand returns to the small of my back, and the other pushes open the door for me, that we leave the courthouse behind us as Mr. and Mrs. Matthews.

  In the quiet ride back to the house where we don’t touch or put any effort into expressing ourselves and the severity of what we’ve done, something drastic happens.

  Everything changes.

  12

  Garrick

  Normally, I don’t bother ordering nearly every item off the takeout menu unless the guys are here, but I have no clue what Rylee likes.

  Despite not having said a word since we got home, she’s curled up at the end of the couch absentmindedly watching TV instead of locked away in her room like usual. I think she feels obligated to stick around down here considering what today is, not that I’d blame her if she needed space.

  I’ve never given much thought about marriage before now, never considered who my future bride would be or what it’d feel like to find love. Mum never preached anything of the sort to us because she wanted us to find happiness in any way we could—whether that was in a significant other, family, career, or otherwise.