Transient Moon

by Kos, Gaja J. ;

  In an explosion of speed, Voit leaped from the bench and positioned himself before me. “We’re not going anywhere until Lotte says so.”

  “You might be Raya’s kid, but you’re not my sovereign,” the sword-fumbler growled.

  It was the last sound he made.

  Lightning fast, power burst from Voit. I blinked at the shock of potency, and the next thing I knew, both demons lay sprawled across the ground.

  “I said,”—fire danced at Voit’s fingertips—“we’re not going anywhere. Now get the fuck out before I flay you alive.”

  His wrath rode the air, yet when it reached me, the presence held a comforting quality. Warmth swelled in my chest anew.

  The two assholes broke down into particles the instant Voit released them from the translucent weight that had kept their bodies pinned and made a beeline for the door. They entered the shadowy landscape beyond the courtyard, their absence oddly tangible.

  Another perk of my demonic self? Or just my overactive imagination?

  Fuck if I knew.

  I rested my chin on my palms. “So this is it, huh?”

  A sympathetic smile pulled on Voit’s lips. He reclaimed his spot beside me, gaze sweeping the greenery before meeting mine.

  “Actually, no. My mother…” He sighed. “My mother wants to offer you a deal. In all honesty, I don’t know why the fuck she didn’t lead with that, but I guess she valued intimidation over common sense in that moment. Or, well, in general, given all the shit choices she’s made lately…”

  The stirrings of a laugh rose in my chest, but never broke free. Whatever Raya had to offer, I was fairly certain I wouldn’t like it.

  “The demon who attacked Melina is called Svinimir,” Voit said quietly.

  I sucked in a breath. “How—”

  She knew. Raya knew even before I did who lay at the heart of it all.

  “You asked her,” I said at last. “When I told you about the demonic essence.”

  A tick worked in Voit’s jaw. “She put me under a blood oath. I couldn’t say anything to you until you came to the Shadow World.”

  I tipped my head back and stared at the dainty leaves of the birch—rustling again, now that Voit’s agitation leaked into the atmosphere. Suffocating the impulse to tear into Raya sucked up nearly every last ounce of my energy. I didn’t care how she figured out who was behind the attack. All I could think about was where I would be right now if I hadn’t had Liva’s help.

  At the mercy of a bloody heartless, power-hungry liege.

  “Well, the joke’s on her,” I said dryly. “I already knew it was Svinimir.”

  Voit didn’t answer.

  Unease slithered through my insides. I swallowed past the lump in my throat and looked at the demon beside me. At the grim expression on his face. “What?”

  He shook his head, cursed under his breath, then faced me. “But do you know how to get to him?”

  It was my turn to stay silent.

  “Raya is prepared to send her demons after Svinimir and deliver him to you on a platter. Under one condition.”

  I grimaced, but forced myself to ask, “Yeah, and what would that be?”

  “Your pledge to our court.”

  The blood in my veins seemed to freeze over and boil at the same time. I curled my fingers into fists, nails scraping skin hard enough to draw blood.

  “Lotte…”

  I growled a warning and looked away, hoping Voit got the message. He had nothing to do with this mess, but right now, I was afraid I would lash out at him all the same. With my mind flashing red-hot, my emotions less than stable, and the wolf—as well as the demon—thrashing inside me, a single unintentional trigger could set me off. So I kept controlling my breaths, kept controlling that foreign pulse of power inside me until the urge to burn everything to ashes subsided.

  Subsided, but didn’t go away.

  “You know,” I ventured carefully, still not trusting my temper, “Raya’s proposition sounds a lot like blackmail. And let me tell you, I’ve had enough of that shit to last me a good long while.”

  It was kind of ironic, really, that the second Isa saw the light and offered me a choice instead of threats, another would-be queen swooped in to claim Senior Agent Vogt’s former pain-in-the-ass mantle.

  As I started to massage the pain throbbing in my temples, Voit put a tentative arm around my shoulders. Surprisingly, I didn’t flinch away or bite his head off.

  We stayed like that for a while—me inhaling his familiar scent, Voit’s fingertips mapping out a soothing pattern down my upper arm as he held me. The shadow echoes of trees shifted across the stone as the light adjusted, mimicking the path of the sun this realm would never see.

  But the silence, even the gently ebbing power that was apparently encoded in the very air of this world—unwound the tight coils of my body until all that remained was a bone-deep weariness.

  I wished I could just hide in this pocket of solitude, but also knew better than to long for something that could never happen. Svinimir was out there. Melina still in a coma.

  I owed it to her to catch his vile ass.

  Possibly sensing the change, that flicker of the predator adamant to finish the job, Voit broke off the embrace with a reassuring squeeze, then sat cross-legged on the bench, facing me.

  “When I learned Raya wanted you, I tried to explain that if she offered her assistance without expecting anything in return, there would be a far greater chance of you joining us. Which is also why I wanted to be the one to reach out. I sincerely thought I’d convinced her,”—he groaned—“but my mother isn’t patient. Nor is she the type to give anything for free.”

  I snorted. “No wonder you wanted to make a life for yourself in our realm.”

  This was part of the reason I’d chosen to be a lone wolf and had separated myself from the pack I would have belonged to once I finished my werewolf training. While the majority followed liberal, modern ways where there was no alpha calling the shots, the democracy tended to fall apart in times of danger. And being coerced into doing something I would rather not wasn’t a kind of life I envisioned for myself.

  Somehow, even working for ICRA seemed less of a blow than following the likes of Raya who was basically the worst kind of pack. On steroids.

  Voit glanced up from under his long lashes, a sympathetic smile on his lips. “My mother’s the kind of controlling hard-ass that gives our kind a bad name. Of course, that’s why she’s been our sovereign for so long—and why I want as little to do with her court as my lineage allows. Raya tolerates my whims, as she likes to call them, but there will be repercussions for what I did today. Opposing her is bad. Doing it in front of her subjects is a death sentence for anyone not of her blood.”

  I winced. “Shit, Voit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to put you in this position—”

  “Lotte, I don’t give a fuck about that.” He placed a steady hand on my knee, and I really didn’t like the sharp edges his features suddenly gained. Dangerous territory after what he’d just said. “You’re my friend. You fought for me. Kept me from dying in a fucking cell like some wasted lab rat. Trust me, whatever punishment Raya will come up with, it’ll be worth it.”

  “For getting me out?” I frowned.

  Somehow, I had a feeling I was missing something vital.

  Voit’s shoulders rose, then fell as he drew his hand back. “For warning you.”

  A dash of demon fire lit at his fingertips, but he doused the flames before they could spread. His gaze traveled across the courtyard, brow furrowed as if he were contemplating whether to say anything more or leave it at that. I wasn’t entirely sure what I wanted, either.

  “She won’t stop,” he said quietly after seconds passed, though the words were as hard and pointed as if he’d shouted. “If you refuse to join our court in exchange for Svinimir’s apprehension, she’ll still pursue you. With your powers… Raya believes that left alone, you could become a threat. And she’s adamant to shackle you to her b
efore that happens.”

  Chills snaked down my spine.

  “Lotte,”—he sighed, looking even more conflicted and bothered than before—“I might lead a fairly straight life, but I certainly didn’t get that from my mother. She’s ancient, and she doesn’t shy away from the traditional demonic ways even if she doesn’t advertise them outright. And I’m not talking about living in the gray area between light and darkness, like most of us do. Murder, torture, blackmail… That’s where her true power lies. She won’t hesitate to unleash its full weight on you if your defiance crosses the line. And unless you’re ready to bow before her, trust me, it will.”

  The can of Paulaner I pulled from the fridge was gone before I even made it to the living room. I grabbed another, then padded over to the couch and all but collapsed on the cushions.

  Allies.

  That was the last thing Voit told me before he dropped me off at my place. I’d need allies to fend Raya off.

  I blew out a frustrated breath. It wasn’t like I didn’t have capable individuals surrounding me—individuals I was sure could hold their own against a demon of Raya’s power. But I wasn’t entirely sure I could live with myself if I dragged them into this. If something were to happen to them just because I was neck-deep in shit creek.

  Groaning, I opened the beer and swallowed several mouthfuls. I typed out a quick text to Alec, letting him know I was all right but in no mood to talk. Knowing him, he’d see straight through the lie. But he also wouldn’t push me into a discussion I wasn’t mentally prepared for just yet.

  After I hit send, I tapped the phone against my thigh, eyes closed. The dull sound pulsed through the silence, and it wasn’t until the rumble of a van going faster than the speed limit intruded on my unintentional mantra that I moved at all. Curling my legs beneath me, I unlocked the screen and tapped the contacts icon, ignoring Alec’s text. I contemplated calling Isa to let her know what was going on—and hopefully brainstorm a plan—when a knock sounded at my door.

  I placed my phone next to the Paulaner on the club table, pressed down on the button to lock its scratched screen, then sucked in a few deep breaths to sample the air. Another groan uncurled from my chest, but I pushed up nonetheless, my bare feet making no sound as I padded across the hardwood floor.

  Just for a second, I hesitated.

  Then yanked the door open.

  Twenty-Seven

  “May I come in?” Afanasiy was standing on the threshold, almost painfully beautiful in his chiseled masculinity except for the weariness shadowing his violet eyes.

  A grunt and a wave of my hand was the only answer I could give him. I stepped aside, then locked the door with an ominous snick.

  Afanasiy made a beeline for the couch, his broad shoulders uncharacteristically slumped as he claimed his usual spot—as if whatever strength had kept him upright deflated from his frame in one massive wave.

  Some part of me itched to curl up next to him, comfort him as much as myself, but I crossed my arms and resisted the temptation.

  Afanasiy had been there in the throne room.

  He’d stood by Raya when her lackeys manhandled me. When she threatened me.

  No. There was no safety in his warmth.

  Afanasiy had made it perfectly clear where his allegiance lay. And it sure as fuck wasn’t with me.

  “I wasn’t aware of her plans,” he said, gaze pinned on something in the distance. “Not until she already sent her enforcers after you.”

  One of my eyebrows rose of its own accord. “And after?”

  Violet eyes locked on mine. For what it was worth, Afanasiy looked haunted, with an underlying current of thoroughly pissed off, but, well…

  It really wasn’t worth that much.

  “She’s my liege.”

  “Yeah. But she isn’t mine,” I said with surprising calmness. “I’m a werewolf, Afanasiy. Whatever those sick fucks in the lab did to me, it doesn’t change who I am. Or where I belong. And it isn’t the Shadow World.”

  Every muscle in his toned body locked up. I wasn’t even sure he was breathing until he asked, “Not even with me?”

  No. Yes.

  Fuck, I wasn’t sure about anything anymore.

  Save for one thing.

  “I do love you, Afanasiy. I’m pissed as fuck, but I love you.”

  The relief that swept through him was a visible thing, echoes of it warming the hidden mark on my arm. Damn it. I scooted next to him on the couch, unable to stand the distance any longer. His knuckles trailed down my back, and I leaned in for a kiss.

  “I love you, too, kāros,” he whispered before his lips claimed mine. His tongue sought entrance, and I moaned, opening myself to him until his taste, his touch, was the only reality left.

  His fingers explored my spine, my waist, dipping down to my ass before coming back up again. Afanasiy was letting me decide how I wanted this to unfold. Giving me all the control he could.

  And for that, I was grateful.

  Heat pooled between my thighs as his caresses charged me. I straddled him, grinding against his erection before I pulled back slightly to liberate him from his pants.

  Afanasiy didn’t stay idle as I fumbled with the first button.

  His thumb hooked behind the pajama shorts I’d changed into when I got home. He tugged the material aside, making me extremely glad I opted for the comfortable wide fit instead of the snug male boxers I usually preferred to sleep in during the winter months. The warmth of Afanasiy’s presence grazed my folds, followed by the brush of his fingers. I moaned into his mouth, cursing how wet a single touch from him could make me.

  Only it wasn’t just a single touch.

  Holding my shorts aside, Afanasiy plunged three fingers inside me. We both groaned, my back instinctively arching as the sensation threatened to sweep me to a whole other plane, but I didn’t give in. I ripped away the final two buttons, then wrapped my hand around the thick, hard base of his cock.

  Afanasiy’s teeth bit into my lip as I guided my palm up his length, but before I could do anything more, he pulled out his fingers fast enough to make me gasp, grabbed hold of my hips, then rammed himself inside me.

  I cried out. My nails dug into his shoulder blades as he buried himself all the way to the hilt, stretching me to the point of that fucking perfect pain. His grip on my hips was bruising, turning me on so badly that every split second we remained locked like that, unmoving, became torture. I squeezed my muscles in warning—which coaxed a low growl from his lips, but no action.

  Damn him.

  Trembling, I shifted my hips and teased his length. Slowly at first, then faster. His fingers dug into my sides, enforcing my rhythm as I rode him, feeling him get harder, thicker, his breaths more out of control with each downward thrust.

  My orgasm erupted without warning. A force that ripped through my flesh and cast Afanasiy overboard right along with me. We held on to one another, both of us shivering as ripples of release gradually lessened their hold, then subsided, until there was nothing left but the sweet scent of sex dominating the room.

  “I won’t let anyone take this away from me,” Afanasiy whispered into my neck before planting a trail of kisses down to my shoulder.

  “What?” My voice was shaky, though clarity returned to my mind full force. “Afanasiy? What are you talking about?”

  His thumb caressed my jaw, violet eyes stark with lingering passion—and something darker. “Raya knows of our fledgling bond.”

  I wanted to push back, put some space between us, but my body refused to obey. Instead, I sank deeper.

  Afanasiy brushed my hair away from my face. “She won’t allow me to see you unless you join our court.”

  This time, I didn’t even have to put in any effort. My body recoiled and shot back, calves hitting the table and spilling what was left of the Paulaner on the floor.

  “What?”

  “We might not have accepted the bond yet, Lotte, but it’s there. And staying away from one another will be tort
ure for us both. Raya knows that.”

  “And you’re just, what, going to let her threaten you?” Anger burned inside me bright enough that it was a wonder I didn’t catch fire. “How can you serve someone like that?”

  “She’s my liege.”

  “She doesn’t have to be,” I spat.

  Demons could change courts. I knew as much from what Lena had told me of the Shadow World. It might not be common, but it’s certainly possible if you find another demonic sovereign to take you in.

  Something snapped inside me when Afanasiy shook his head.

  “It’s not just her I serve, Lotte. It’s her subjects. Demons like Voit. And I’m honor bound—”

  “Fuck honor!”

  I was shouting and I didn’t care.

  This was the demon I’d been prepared to spend my life with. Prepared to give my heart, body, and soul.

  My stomach churned.

  “Is it honorable to take someone against their will?” I seethed. “Honorable to blackmail people into subservience? Is it fucking honor that’s driving Raya to withhold information that could bring down the bastard who nearly bludgeoned my friend to death? Who put her in a fucking coma just because he didn’t take no for an answer?”

  Tears streamed down my cheeks, but they weren’t fueled by hurt. Yes, that was there, too, but right now, the thing claiming the spotlight was my undiluted fury.

  My gaze burrowed into his. “You know what, Afanasiy? What I told Raya goes for you too. I. Don’t. Need. This. Shit. I’ll suffer the distance between us if I have to. But I won’t be owned by anybody. And I damned well won’t be bargained like some fucking prize.”

  Without waiting to hear any more of his excuses, I turned on my heel and marched out the door, then slammed it behind me. All of my things were still back at the Zentrum, including my ICRA credentials, but I was beyond caring. I’d reach Isa somehow. Even if it meant snarling at security until they let me up.

  I was done being everyone’s pawn.

  The shift flowed over me, paws padding down the cool sidewalk as I shook off the tattered remnants of my clothes. My wolf senses surged to the front, but not even that was enough to hold the roiling thoughts at bay.