It was a journey Fox had avoided in conversation, though it was ever on his mind. He still hadn’t told any of the Shavid what Farran’s plans for him were. And now, he kept the secret from Lai as well. He was not eager to get her hopes up that Adella could be restored, in case he should fail. Besides, it was not his story to tell. That responsibility belonged to Farran.
And it was Farran who was waiting downstairs for them when the pair finally emerged. He was sitting alone in the empty common room, lounging easily with his feet propped up on a table. He had gone, Fox knew, to see Adella in private one last time before they departed. Fox had hoped the meeting would take longer, that Farran would spend weeks in the Whitethorn temple. Now that the god was back so quickly, fear that they would immediately be taking to the road again began to fill Fox.
Lai herself seemed rather pleased to see the god. “I knew you were returned!” she said excitedly, rushing right up to him with a genuine familiarity. “I could feel it, and I knew something had happened, but that you were alright!” And then, almost in the same breath, she added, “And I’ve gotten stronger as well! Look!” She held out a hand, and Fox and Farran watched as she began to summon forth a ball of swirling salt water. It seemed to be an effort for her, but she pushed past it, and soon had a perfect globe of ocean, its insides swirling with tiny fish and bits of seaweed.
Fox applauded, but Farran looked positively astounded. “You’ve done all that by yourself?”
“Of course I have,” said Lai sassily. “What, did you expect me to just wait around for every lesson? You could have been gone for months, and things were changing too quickly. I had to manage it all the best I could.”
Fox watched as the pirate’s face shifted from shock to pride, tinged with sadness. “Well done,” he said putting his hands together twice in a brief, quiet echo of Fox’s applause. “You are beyond impressive. Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined that my ... that any Godkin of my blood would be so gifted, with the potential to be so powerful.” His eyes made their way past Lai now, and met with Fox’s gaze. Something was bothering him. Something was making Farran nervous.
And then, Fox knew. “She’s becoming a target, isn’t she?” he asked.
“A what?” asked Lai. But Fox didn’t answer. Nor did Farran. They were looking at each other, with an unspoken understanding. And then, slowly, Farran nodded.
“You said no Godkin can live their own life after they manifest their parent’s gifts,” said Fox, recalling the conversation so long ago that had preceded the loss of his memories. “You said they are meant to be claimed.”
“Aye,” said Farran bleakly. “That I did. And, I had hoped that I was overreacting. I thought perhaps that once I regained my own powers, she would simply stop.”
“She is standing right here,” growled Lai. “And she would appreciate if someone told her what in the name of Spirit is going on.”
“I am afraid,” said Farran slowly, painfully, “that you are no longer safe. There are people who know about you. Know your powers, and would use them for true evil. My foolish, naive hope was that your own inheritance of my abilities and bloodline would simply fade away once I returned. That this whole experience would be nothing more than a smudge in your history.”
Farran looked so uncomfortable now that Fox stepped in, taking his best friend by the shoulders and forcing her to look at him. “Farran made a choice when he sacrificed himself to save me,” he said firmly. “A choice I will always be grateful for. He left you alive.”
“And why wouldn’t he —” Lai began, but Fox cut her off.
“Because,” he said carefully, “that is why most gods breed half-mortal children. They use them as a vessel, to harness their divine powers if something terrible should happen. And, if or when it does, the child is drained of the power. And, usually, their life.”
“It’s a sick practice,” said Farran bitterly, sounding disgusted by his own kind. “One that’s lasted since the dawn of time, and the creation of the gods. And, it leaves you in the strange minority, Laila Blackroot. One of the few Godkin in history to ever be left alive by choice. Born of love, not of self-preservation. And, now, allowed to continue to grow into whatever half-deity you may become.”
“And these people,” said Lai, surprisingly calm. “The ones who know who I am?”
“It is one man in particular,” said Farran. “A general, called Vol Tyrr.”
“But he died,” Lai insisted. “Fox told me the stories of Calibas, Vol Tyrr died!”
Farran shook his head. “I stayed in Calibas for over a week after the destruction, searching for any sign of his body. I couldn’t feel him in my floodwaters, and I couldn’t find him in my piece of the afterlife. The home for those who die by drowning or in shipwrecks.”
“That’s where you’ve been,” said Fox. He’d been wondering why Farran had disappeared so frequently since his return, if he hadn’t been spending time with Lai or Fox. “You’ve been looking for him, just to make sure he’s dead.”
“And I do not believe that he is,” said Farran. “He knows I have a daughter, and he knows where you are.” There was pure desperation in his eyes now as he looked at Lai. “He will come for you. And I cannot keep you safe here in the valley.”
In a horrible instant, Fox realized what Farran was about to say. “Farran, a word in private?” he said quickly, but the god waved his hand dismissively and pressed on.
“The quest ahead of us is dangerous, and unknown. But, we will be together. Somewhere Fox and I can keep you safe, and help you realize your own potential. And, when the journey is done, I promise, no man will be able to harm you. And you will need no man to protect you.”
Lai pulled away from Fox and Farran, fists clenched as she apparently tried to think. She took several deep breaths, looking around the Five Sides as she did. She walked around the entire common room, tears slowly beginning to fill her eyes as she ran her fingers along the edges of tables and the names carved into the pillars and the mantlepiece. Fox had known her long enough not to even need to feel her emotions with the wind: the conflict within her was clear, even from the outside. He watched her with his heart in his throat, knowing that the choice wasn’t his anymore. Should she choose to stay in Thicca Valley, or run away with Cullen and find a life where Vol Tyrr would have a harder time tracking her down, it was not Fox’s decision. And, should she choose to join them, Fox knew he might never sleep soundly again, distracted with worry over her at every moment.
It was several minutes before Lai finally turned to them again, her jaw set. Her cheeks were wet with tears, but her eyes were filled with determination, and her voice did not waver as she said, “Tell me about this quest.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
The Pirate King’s Daughter
Lai listened intently to Farran and Fox as they told her all about the hidden places, and all they knew of the journey ahead. Fox, she thought, looked truly miserable as she agreed to travel with them, but she never got a chance to ask him why. Soon, the Shavid began to arrive, and Fox sighed. “I suppose it’s finally time to tell them,” he said gloomily.
Fox stood and cleared his throat, calling the Shavid to attention. “Listen,” he said, climbing onto the counter top at the bar so he could be seen and heard by all. “I’ve got a tale to tell, but I’m not sure you’re going to like it.” Lai smiled softly at him, remembering suddenly how they used to dance and sing up there as children. It seemed so long ago. Now, though it had only been months since he’d left, she felt they were both years older. As the Shavid began to quiet, Lai marveled at how well Fox managed to command the room. Something he’d learned on the road, no doubt.
“Is this going to be another boring story about hunting?” shouted one of the Shavid jokingly from the back. Some of the others chuckled good-naturedly, but when Fox didn’t so much as crack a smile, they all fell silent again at once.
Slowly, he said to the gathered players, “It seems the wind is calling me. I hav
e a journey I must take, and I don’t believe it will lead me down your paths.”
There was immediate sorrow on every face, and some started to argue. But the one called Radda raised his hand to stifle them, and they quickly obeyed. It was Radda himself who spoke next. “If you hear a different call than we do, my boy, it is not our place to stop you. The wind may have different roads for all of us.” He bowed his head respectfully. “May the Wanderlust guide you, and the wind be ever in your heart.”
He placed a hand over his own heart, and the rest of the Shavid quickly followed. Fox opened his mouth to speak again, but before he was able, someone else spoke up. “I’m afraid it’s not just the mapweaver,” said a male voice. A dwarf stepped forward until he was right beside the bar, looking up at Fox. This, Lai realized, must be Darby. She’d never met him, but she had read about him in many of Fox’s letters.
“You hear the same call, Darby Whistler?” asked Radda.
“He is my apprentice,” said Darby simply. “I am meant to go where he wanders. And until I am given another sign from the wind, I will remain by his side.”
“Darby,” said Fox, “you don’t even know where we’re going. You don’t have to —”
There was a commotion in the heart of the group, and two more people quickly pushed their way forward. One, Lai recognized at once as Neil, the tall, dark young man who had become close with Fox during their first visit to the valley. Clinging to his arm was a pale, redheaded female. Gully, Lai would have to guess. Fox had mentioned their wedding in one of his stories last night.
“We will travel with you,” said Neil firmly. “You’ve saved both of our lives, and we don’t feel the same calls as the Shavid.” He grinned sheepishly. “In this one instance only, I am grateful not to be Blessed. It means I am free to journey by your side, brother.”
“Brother,” repeated Fox, hopping down from the counter top and grasping Neil’s arm. “I am always grateful for your company.”
“So then,” said Radda, glancing all about the group. “Anyone else?”
When no one answered at once, Fox spoke up again. “Looks like it’s just the four of us, then! And Farran, of course. And Lai.”
“And when do you depart?”
Fox glanced over at Farran, who groaned and stood, apparently resigned to drawing attention to himself now. Most of the Shavid, in fact, looked startled to see him when he spoke. Lai found herself wondering if he’d shielded himself from their gazes on purpose. Then, almost immediately after that, she wondered if she could learn to do that herself.
“We leave in four days,” said Farran. “I know it’s not long, but the sooner we abandon ship, the better off everyone will be.”
“Then three nights hence, we shall celebrate with a grand send-off,” said Radda. He was met at once with cheers and hurrahs from the Shavid, and immediately people began gathering to speak to Fox and his companions. Excusing herself from Farran, Lai pushed her way through them to join the smaller group, eager to meet those she would be traveling with.
For several minutes, the Shavid pressed in on them. Wishing Fox well on his ventures, lamenting that the wind had not permitted them to hear the same call and wander with him. A girl Lai recognized as Mindi swiftly kissed Fox on either cheek, and hugged him for a bit longer than anyone else had. And then she winked at Lai before disappearing into the chaos again.
And then, a familiar face appeared before them. The confused, crestfallen face of Cullen, who’d made his way up to their group, and now stared at Lai. “Is what I’ve heard true?” he asked. “You ... you’re leaving?”
It seemed that, quite suddenly, the rest of the people in the room were giving Lai a wider berth. They became interested in other things, and slipped away to speak to other people. And Lai, a moment too late, remembered that she had invited Cullen over for breakfast, to finally meet Fox. And now, here he stood, looking more heartbroken than she had ever seen anyone in her life.
∞∞∞
“So then,” said Cullen, sizing up Fox as they stood in the kitchen, Lai between them. “You’re the reason my family had to uproot themselves and barely escape town with their lives.”
“A lot of that going around lately,” said Fox lazily, arms crossed over his chest. “It’s an occupational hazard of being a hero.”
“Funny, ‘hero’s’ not the term I would have chosen first,” said Cullen.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get the chance to tell you,” said Lai, trying and failing to ease the tension in the room. “I wanted to, really. To explain. But it all happened so quickly, and there’s things I need to do. Things I need to be a part of, with my fath – with Farran.”
“And with him,” Cullen replied, jerking his chin at Fox.
“He’s the one who has to find our way,” insisted Lai.
“And why do they need you?” asked Cullen sharply. And then, immediately contrite, he softened his voice and said, “I only mean, why do you have to go at all? I can protect you.” He took Lai’s hands, and she saw Fox turn away out of the corner of her eye. “We can keep training together, and learning everything about your gifts. Lai,” he said, a hint of pleading creeping into his voice now, “I want to marry you.”
“I want to marry you, too,” whispered Lai.
“Then why can’t we stay here, and carry on as planned? We can keep building a life together, and we’ll keep each other safe. You know we can. I know you’re strong enough. We can run, we can fight, whatever you want. But you don’t have to wander off into the unknown, away from everyone and everything you know and love.”
“She’ll have me,” Fox growled quietly.
Before Cullen could snap back, Lai took his face in both of her hands. “Cullen,” she said quietly, “I know we could survive. We’re strong partners. But ... I think I truly want to go. I don’t want to leave you,” she continued quickly. “I don’t want to leave anybody. But this journey, this quest ... it’s my family. It’s my life. Every question I’ve ever wanted answered about who I am is out there. And I have to find it.”
“Lai, you know who you are,” said Cullen. “You’re our Captain.”
Lai smiled sadly at him, and swallowed back a painful lump of emotion. “But,” she whispered, “I could be so much more.”
Cullen looked at her for a long moment, sorrow in every crease of his face. Finally, he leaned over and kissed her gently on the forehead. He bowed to Fox ever so briefly and, without another word, saw himself out of the kitchen.
“Are you sure this is what you want?” asked Fox.
“It is,” said Lai. “More than I realized, in fact.” She glanced over her shoulder at Fox. “You know, I’ve fantasized about going out on the road with you. Even had your parents suggest I join you on your travels, and see the world as you did. When I chose to stay in the valley instead, it’s because I was afraid. I thought I had no real choice. That there was nothing out there for me that I couldn’t find within the valley.”
“And now?”
“Now,” said Lai, straightening up resolutely and turning her back to the kitchen door, “I am more afraid of staying who I always was.”
∞∞∞
Cullen did not show up to training the next morning, nor the one after that. Instead, Fox and Neil joined the ranks, briefly lending their expertise to the drills. Neil taught them a few very useful hand-to-hand combat tricks he’d learned, and Fox demonstrated his own skills with throwing knives. That evening, almost every unattached woman in the group found some excuse or other to join the boys’ table at the Five Sides, apparently impressed by their displays.
On the second morning, Norda accompanied them, proving herself to be a staggeringly dangerous combatant, even wrapped in countless layers of winter clothing. She quickly demonstrated the flaws in the trainees’ footwork and stances, and Lai asked the lady-in-waiting to return that afternoon for Picck’s exercises. By dinner, Norda’s own group of admirers dwarfed both Fox’s and Neil’s combined, and she found herself surrounded by
women eager to learn from her, and men clamoring to court her. The attention, it seemed, made her uncomfortable, and soon Lai had to swoop in and rescue her from the crowds.
And, every day, Lai took to the woods on her own, finding peace in the frost-covered quiet. She would first wait for Cullen by the edge of the trees, and when he never showed, she would embark alone. There, the wolves kept her company. She could always hear them, just out of sight, and she always left them something of her kills as a thank you. They had once kept Fox and Neil alive, and she felt safe knowing they’d been here in the woods for her, too.
For three days, Lai busied herself with farewells and fulfilling promises. She journeyed further into the forests on her hunting trips, bringing in as much game as she could for Trapper Foxglove. She named Widow Aedish as her successor, writing her detailed instructions on how to run the morning training if Cullen never came back to them. And, though it broke her heart to do so, she wrote a letter of apology to Cullen himself, wishing him all the best.
Farewells were said to Rose and Picck. Baby Rivena was too young to remember anything, but Lai still held her tightly on her last night at the tavern, and only let her go when she became too fussy to hang onto any longer. Picck insisted on filling her rations with the finest breads and cheeses for the road, and Rose helped Lai patch any loose threads in her wardrobe, before the two packed them away, talking for hours about nothing in particular.
The eve of departure had come far too soon. And the goodbye Lai had been dreading most finally arrived, when Borric found her perched on the tavern rooftop, watching the snow begin to fall around her. He poked his head out through an upstairs window and called, “Mind if I join you?”
“You still know how to climb?” teased Lai, and Borric laughed heartily.
Inkspice (The Mapweaver Chronicles Book 2) Page 31