Night Surrender
Page 11
A low chuckle slipped from Damon’s lips before he took a deep breath. “Amazing. You spent the last half a year or whatever trying to find yourself and stop being a complete ass, then you do this.” He clicked his tongue. “When you came home you smelled like her. And you knew it because you headed right here and showered for like an hour.”
“I didn’t even see you that day.”
“Rosa said you were coming back, but you didn’t show when we expected you. I was walking the area, waiting, and witnessed you beeline into your trailer like a felon. And I thought it was strange, but now it’s coming together. What’d you do? Fuck her and run away? Sneak out when she was sleeping?”
“I made a mistake,” Wyatt grumbled. “But why are you being so harsh? We can’t have a life together. We don’t mate with humans. It’s never more than a one-night stand.”
“Then you don’t love her?”
Wyatt rubbed at his chin. The rough whiskers distracted him for a second—he needed to shave.
“Coward,” Damon accused.
“Come on—”
“You’re afraid. If you didn’t love her, it’d take you a second to say so. Instead, you’re drifting off, ignoring it. You aren’t fooling us. We’ve known something had changed with you. You’re barely keeping it together.”
Wyatt rolled his eyes. “You’re imagining things.”
“Come clean.” Damon’s gaze turned into hard flint. “Whatever happened between you and Nancy… whatever is happening, she’s human but she’s practically family. If Mija were here she’d tear you limb from limb. I’m taking her place. Nancy is as close to pack as a human can come, and you know we protect pack.”
Wyatt couldn’t deny the truth there. Nancy had been Mija’s only friend for years, which wasn’t something taken lightly given Mija’s tragic past. She’d come to America only to witness the death of her husband and daughter—though the latter had been revealed as a lie, as Charlotte was alive and well.
In the decades of loneliness, Mija had only bonded with a single soul. And Nancy’s soul was as pure as they came. Otherwise, why would she be waiting in a crummy room at a motel in the middle of nowhere?
“I think I should talk to Reid,” Wyatt said. “I told a human about us and he deserves to know.”
“You should talk to him, but you also need to go back and talk to Nancy.”
Wyatt looked away. “That’s done.”
“I doubt that. Whatever she feels, she dropped everything to come here for. She’s willing to face her emotions. So much so that she wound up in the woods at night looking for her. Yet you’re the one who seems terrified.”
“She’s human,” Wyatt said pointedly. “Are you missing that entirely?”
“She’s your mate! Are you ignoring that?”
Damon’s words echoed in the night and Wyatt flinched at the thought of every lupine in the area hearing them. “You don’t understand.”
Damon sat back in his chair and studied Wyatt for a moment. He tapped the table and shook his head. “You’re ashamed,” he said slowly. “Because in all the time I’ve known you, you looked down on humans. Didn’t understand them and didn’t want to. Hated getting involved in their world. It must be terrifying, not to mention humbling, to fall for one.”
“I’ve said it before, it’s not your concern.”
“It is my concern. You’ve always been my concern. When you came to me and wanted to become a runner. When you hurt Charlotte, when you hurt yourself.” He scoffed. “When the only thing I could do was literally smack sense into your thick skull, you were my concern. The annoying little brother I never asked for, but here you are.”
Brother. It was a common sentiment amongst the pack. Brother. Sister. But Damon had never called Wyatt as such. Even though they’d been raised together, they’d never gotten close when they were younger. Training together is what led to them and their wolves bonding in an indescribable way, making them friends. Then for the fated time where they’d both been in love with Charlotte, they grew apart yet closer than ever.
“Fine,” Wyatt said. “I love Nancy. She snuck into my heart, and I didn’t keep her out. But there are a million reasons we don’t work, most of which stemming from her being what she is.”
“Like?”
“All the obvious? She’s not exactly the rugged, outdoors type. I live in a trailer. That’s fine for us, but when have you ever heard of a human female wanting to live in the woods in a fucking trailer? They want mansions. They want white picket fences and a green lawn they never walk on. They want suburbia and stucco against brick. Vaulted ceilings,” he rambled.
Damon cocked an eyebrow. “Dude… what the fuck are you talking about?”
“I’ve spent a lot of time with the humans lately. Reading their magazines and watching tv. They want luxury.”
“And Nancy specifically requested a mansion?”
“No—”
“Then shut the fuck up about it. We’ll get you a cabin. You think Charlotte didn’t need some transition time? She was raised by humans. She can help Nancy, as can Mija. Adjusting to a home isn’t a deal breaker.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Shit, Charlotte’s obsessed with curtains, and what’s that even about? Anyways, I can guess the rest.”
“And you don’t see a problem?”
Damon counted on his fingers as he spoke. “She’s not lupine so you can’t have a spiritual bond. Without a bond, you aren’t promised a lifetime of love. And you can’t have children.” He held up his three fingers. “Three scary fucking things. But that’s all. Just three. Everything else is bullshit.”
“Those three are why we don’t mate with humans.”
“And four, because of children. Children carry on legacies,” Wyatt reasoned. “I’ve heard talk of females leaving the pack—”
“In my years as a runner I’ve met about five mixed couples, and I’ve heard about even more. You’re still learning this, but not all Bronze pack talk is reliable talk. I’ve been out there.” Damon gestured around him. “It can work. And it usually works best if the human joins our world, obviously.”
“Right…”
“I should have known that kids would be your biggest hang-up,” Damon said seriously, glancing at the table.
Wyatt had always wanted kids, but strangely, he was content to imagine a life without them if he had Nancy. It’s not like mating a lupine guaranteed a bustling family. Even though lupine, in general, were insanely fertile, every now and then a couple simply couldn’t conceive.
And when that happened, it wasn’t the end of the world. The pack raised children together. When he was younger, he swore he had about five mothers and nearly every older male was like a father.
“Actually, it’s not. It’s just another thing to consider.”
“But if you don’t care, why consider it? Why are you listing every reason not to do this instead of listening to your heart? You didn’t correct me when I said she’s your mate.”
“I know.” Wyatt brushed his hand over the wooden table and couldn’t deny that hearing someone else put it into words made it feel even more concrete.
“Our pack will welcome Nancy. I can guarantee that Reid won’t turn her away. It’s all about you getting over you.”
“Easy for you to say.”
Damon grinned wryly. “Yeah. It is easy for me to say. And on this, I can only speculate. I know you want a real bond with your mate. I can’t pretend it’s not amazing. But love is love.”
“What if she changes her mind?”
“Isn’t there a saying? Cross that bridge when you come to it?” Damon asked. He folded his arms and met Wyatt’s eyes. “Being afraid of a commitment isn’t a lupine trait. You’re going crazy because there’s no guarantee.”
“Wouldn’t you feel the same?”
“A mating bond is only a guarantee because you work your shit out ahead of time, and mate when you’re ready. It’s not a cure-all. Not like us bonded couples never argue.”
�
�It’s more than logic and pride.” Wyatt rubbed his chin and searched the night, seeking something he couldn’t explain. “With the way I felt before, and the way I acted, do I even deserve Nancy? I don’t even know if I like all humans, or just her. Doesn’t that matter?”
Damon scoffed. “I don’t think it matters. You never liked humans. So what? You never hated them. You didn’t get them. Most of us don’t. It’s mainly runners who eventually soften to them in the first place.”
“Right.”
“Is that it, then? Will you quit dicking around and fix your shit?” Damon’s eyes drilled into Wyatt.
Wyatt hesitated. How far was too far in this strange bonding session? He looked away. “That thing about being with—really being with—a human? There are certain needs…”
The confused expression on Damon’s face made Wyatt trail off, but after a moment Damon simply shrugged.
“I’ve done it,” Damon said. “It’s not impossible. I know you, and I know you never believe a guy when he says he’s done it but believe me. That shouldn’t figure into your decision at all.”
“I see.”
“Now that all that’s out of the way, how about a drink?” Damon asked, looking meaningfully at Wyatt’s front door.
Being known for always keeping copious quantities of the strongest beer, Wyatt was used to that part of the conversation coming up, regardless of who sat at his table. As nice as it would be to continue the brotherly love, Wyatt declined. “I have somewhere to be. And some crow to eat.”
SIXTEEN
Wyatt stared at the door. The golden numbers were tarnished and scuffed. Green paint peeled away at the edges of each metal curve, years of layered cheap paint trying to escape.
He’d come to recognize the subtle déjà vu of the situation. How many times did he fuck up and have to knock on Nancy’s door? Apologize and admit he’d been an ass? Too many, and hopefully this was the end of it.
He rapped his knuckles on the wood, though he didn’t have words planned. No matter how much he thought of it, he wasn’t the poetic type, at least not right now. A year ago, he would have had the perfect words for any situation.
Nancy had a way of disrupting his usual rhythm.
The door swung open. It had to be close to midnight, but her light had been on and she was wide awake. She stepped to the side, ushering him in with an icy stare and nothing else.
He entered and took quick stock of the room. Nicer than he’d had when he visited her, but not by much. A book lay on the bed next to a half-open suitcase. He spun around and looked her top to bottom. He hadn’t allowed himself to appreciate her earlier. Didn’t want to get lost in her eyes or let a glimpse of her cause flashbacks that would weaken his resolve.
Gone was the puffy coat. She wore slim jeans and a simple turtleneck, and on her ears were tiny silver owls. Her expression was cautious, but her cheeks were rosy.
“You look beautiful,” he said.
She tucked her hair back behind her ears. “That’s all?”
“I went full in a circle. Trying to do the right thing made me into an ass, and I’m sorry.”
“Go on,” she muttered.
“I was scared, and being that fear isn’t a normal part of my life, I reacted poorly.”
She arched a brow. “I’m scary?”
“The thought that I may fuck it up.” He took her hands, which she allowed reluctantly. “When lupine mate, it’s for life. It’s a bond of two spirits, blessed by the ancestors. There’s no escaping it.”
“Right,” she said carefully. “You mentioned it.”
“Imagining the rest of my life with you is easy. But I have trouble accepting that at some point in the future, maybe years down the line, I’ll mess up and you’ll leave, and we won’t have the rest of our lives. Because we can’t know that we’re soul mates.” He squeezed her hands in his. “You’re the brave one here, and I’m giving in.”
“Giving in? Do you mean what I think you mean? Us?” She tilted her head and studied his face.
“I love you. And like you said, I already claimed you. If you really think you can forgive me for ditching you, then I’d like you to come home with me.” A heavy weight lifted from his heart.
A smile flickered on her lips but turned into a slight frown. “I thought… nevermind.”
“What?”
She bit her lip for a second then exhaled. “Do you remember the night in my car? I thought this—all of this—was in your head as a rescue. I thought you were pushing me away because in your head you were trying not to be my hero. And I came here… not like I thought it was a test, but because I wanted to prove that I can make my own decisions.”
He blinked at her. “I hadn’t thought of that at all.”
“Well, after everything with Brent…”
“I never saw that as me rescuing you,” he admitted. “But yeah, if you wanted to prove you’re not the damsel in distress, point taken. You technically bullied a wolf to track me down, and you’ve put me in my place more than once.”
“Oh,” she murmured. “If you put it that way. I’m used to being seen as a doormat.”
“Total wolf in sheep’s clothing,” he said cupping her face in his hands. “Or owl’s, I suppose.”
“Funny,” she replied, her face deadpan.
“Do you forgive me, though?”
“Of course I do. That’s why I’m here.”
“That easily?”
“You’re a complicated, crazy guy. Somehow, I mostly understand how you think and why you think that way,” she said with a sigh. “And it wasn’t easy. Before I got here, I spent every day split between hating you and missing you.”
He kissed her forehead and took a deep breath. She smelled sweeter than ever. “I’ll make it up to you.”
* * * *
The bed creaked softly, and all Wyatt had done was sat down to kick off his shoes. It was a sign that if the night progressed how he planned, it was going to get loud.
Nancy stood between his legs and rested her hands on his shoulders. “You and me and cheap motels, right?”
She’d read his thoughts exactly. “I wish I could say it’ll get better.”
“I don’t care about the decor,” she promised.
“I hate laying you down on sleazy mattresses that a hundred other people have been on,” he said frowning.
She pressed her forehead to his and rubbed their noses together. “I don’t care if it’s squeaky beds or a cold floor or a tiny shower,” she whispered. “You make everything magical.”
He kissed her lips briefly, a teasing glance of flesh. “What about under the moon? In the grass?”
Her lips curled up. “Sex outdoors is on my bucket list.”
“What’s a bucket list?”
She didn’t answer, instead sucking his bottom lip into her mouth as she climbed onto the bed and straddled his lap. He gripped her waist and growled softly, a teasing sound that attempted to hide his absolute desperation in the moment.
Every time he’d been with Nancy so far, it had been a frenzy. He didn’t know if his hunger for her would ever fade—he hoped not—but he knew that one of these days he’d like to take it slow. Lay her down and make love to her in a way that he could savor every second.
Tonight that couldn’t happen. He had plans, and they involved making her scream and beg for more.
“I like you in this position,” he said while bringing a hand up to curl around a soft breast. “But I have things I want to do to you.”
“Am I not allowed to be on top? Lupine thing?” she asked with a wicked grin.
“Oh no, not at all. I look forward to watching you bounce up and down on my cock. Tonight, I thought we’d do something different.”
“Different from the usual mind-blowing sex? I’m listening.”
He chuckled and with a smooth motion stood and tossed her onto the bed, which groaned predictably. She scurried onto the center and watched him.
“Striptease?”
&nb
sp; “You’re incorrigible.”
“Oooh, big word. Not a yes or a no, though.” Her eyes landed at his waist. “Tell me what you’re up to.”
He yanked his shirt off and tossed it aside. Nancy’s brown gaze swept over him, turning him on further than he already was, not that he needed the encouragement. He was increasingly delighted to have somehow avoided the dog house, so to speak.
“Wyatt,” she whined. “You’ve dropped the lupine bombshell on me, made me track you across a state line, and now you’re really going to say you want something ‘different’ and not explain what? I’m excited but sort of nervous too. You don’t have a second… you know… do you?”
His eyes widened. “Are you serious?”
“I don’t know. You already hinted vampires exist. I don’t know what other fantasies could actually come true.”
“You fantasize about vamps?” He shook his head. “Wait, you fantasize about a guy with two dicks?”
She covered her face and snickered. “No… I meant… I can’t imagine what you mean.”
He rolled his eyes. “Your imagination is more fertile than I assumed.” He moved to the edge of the bed, reached out, and yanked her to him by the ankles. “Remember our first night together?”
She nodded and a sparkle lit her eyes. It was a sweet memory.
“I told you I would work your body to get you ready.”
“And you did.”
He pulled her shoes off and dropped them to the floor before tugging her jeans down. “What I have in mind is that. But rougher.”
“I’m connecting the dots and I’m still lost,” she said with confusion. She lifted her hips to allow her jeans to finish sliding off then rested on her elbows and peered at him. “I’m already ready for you.”
He knelt on the bed and crawled between her legs. Shoving up the soft fabric of her top, he exposed her perfect skin and lacy peach bra. The lace was a likely sign that she was optimistic that he’d cave into her, and it made his heart pound.
He sat back and admired her for a second. His eyes slid over the matching underwear. He hooked them on his finger and ripped them off, the tearing sound echoing in the quiet room.