Irons and Works: The Complete Series

by E M Lindsey

  Sam hated the replacement the home-health company had sent over, and after watching his spiraling frustration, Derek had offered to help. Sam was hesitant about letting it happen at first. He tended to keep the more unflattering parts of paralysis to himself—like the bladder control issues, and the spasms, and the times when his entire lower half just wouldn’t respond and he needed help with even the simplest transitions from chair to sofa, or chair to bed. Derek had simply put his mind to the task, and after a while, Sam had stopped hesitating to ask.

  “Did May behave for you today?” Sam’s voice came from the doorway, and Derek turned to see the guy had stripped down and was bare-ass naked in his chair.

  “She was perfect, as usual,” Derek told him as he arranged the bath seat at the side of the tub, and a towel resting on the edge. “Sage was watching Jaz, so we took them to lunch and fucked around at the duck pond for a while. She also got a flower from that little shop near the bookstore. The owner was outside making some arrangements and of course the girls charmed her.”

  Sam chuckled as he wheeled to the edge of the tub and set his brake. Derek tested the water, then carefully helped Sam to shift from the chair, to the edge of the tub, and then into the water. He let out a small groan as he laid back, and Derek slid to the floor, grateful to have a moment of peace, even if it was on cold bathroom tiles.

  “Kat took her pretty early though, so I’m not sure if she stayed in a good mood. You know how much she hates it when you’re away,” he finished.

  Sam let out a tiny sigh. “I know. She’s getting better with the whole attachment thing, but her therapist was talking about this pre-memory trauma she’s got goin’ on from the foster home bullshit and she said it could last for most of her life.”

  “God,” Derek said. He’d never known Sam’s cousin—the fifteen-year-old who’d gotten in way over her head with a too-old boyfriend. The guy was in jail now for assault and robbery, and the girl had sunk so deep into heroine Sam confessed he wasn’t sure she was even alive anymore. “Well I’ve noticed a difference the past few months at least, so that means something, right?”

  “It does,” Sam said with a smile. He pushed himself up to sit, holding the side of the tub for balance, and used his other hand to massage his still-trembling legs. “How are you feeling?”

  “Fucking sick of being asked that,” Derek confessed. “Apparently it was all over my goddamn face today and everyone decided to try to play mom with me.”

  Sam shook his head. “It’s out of love, dearie.”

  “Fuck you,” Derek said cheerfully. “I uh…I sold Kevin.” He hated himself for using James’ stupid name for the octopus, but it meant Sam knew exactly what he was talking about.

  “Seriously?”

  Derek sighed internally. “Seriously. I think the guy from the bank thing last night bought it.”

  Sam sat up straighter, almost slipping before he caught himself. “You’re shitting me. Dude, that’s like…”

  “If you say rom-com, I will punch you. I don’t care if you’re naked and in the bath,” Derek warned him without any real heat. “I think he might work in that flower shop we passed by today. The owner had hearing aids in, and she knew sign language, and she…she looked like him. A lot like him.”

  Sam was grinning and Derek hated himself for confessing it all, though he couldn’t help but admit having the weight off felt good. “Did you go in?”

  “Nah. The girls were getting restless and we didn’t have a lot of time to screw around. But I was…the thing is…Mat pointed out that I might want to hand-deliver it since throwing it in the mail would be such a waste. It probably won’t mean anything but…yeah.”

  Sam’s grin softened a little, and he leaned over the edge of the tub, putting his hand on Derek’s shoulder. “Maybe it won’t mean anything at all, and maybe it will. But it can’t hurt to try, can it?”

  Derek worried his bottom lip between his teeth. “I guess not. I’m just such a mess still, I don’t know someone like him would want to put up with all this shit. It’s a lot.”

  “It is,” Sam told him bluntly, “and it might be a little exhausting, but if he feels the same way about you, he’ll think it’s worth it.”

  Derek shrugged. “I don’t even speak his language.”

  “Well clearly there’s not an easy fix for that,” Sam snarked at him. “I mean, it’s not like Kat and Tony haven’t been up our asses about starting ASL or anything.”

  Derek flushed, knowing he was right, and knowing he ought to do it for Jasmine no matter what happened between him and Basil. “Yeah. I…I guess.”

  “I get being afraid,” Sam told him. “You can’t guarantee happiness forever.”

  Derek was half-sure Sam was talking about Ted now, and there was a moment of slightly awkward silence between them. “I know that. And I feel like I owe it to myself to at least try. I think maybe I’ll adhere the sketch to a canvas and throw some varnish on it, then I can walk it over.”

  “Maybe write him a love note and tuck it in the back so he finds it years later when you two are married with five kids,” Sam said, waggling his brows.

  Derek stood up. “That’s it. I’m leaving you to drown.”

  Chapter Five

  Basil jumped, startled when a hand fell down on the desk in front of him. Under Ama’s flat palm was a bright orange post-it with sharpie scribbled on the front. A name—Jay—and a number. He stared at it for a minute, then looked up at his sister’s smirk.

  ‘What is this?’

  ‘A phone number.’

  Rolling his eyes, he pushed his chair back away from the desk. ‘Thank you, I had no idea. Seriously, what is this?’

  ‘You’ll hate all the Deaf events they have going on in Denver this month. It’s all stuff for young kids—bowling, coffee house meet-ups, I think there’s like a D and D game in a card shop?’

  Basil pulled a face. ‘Sounds like my nightmare.’

  ‘I know,’ Ama told him with a grin. ‘But one of the event coordinators and I were emailing, and I asked him if he had any LGBT events planned? Something for actual gay grown-ups. He said they tried to do that a few months ago but the turn-out was really small. Then he said maybe the two of you could get together and get a drink. And talk. He thought you were hot.’

  Basil blinked at her. ‘When did he see me?’

  ‘My profile picture is us on the trip to San Francisco,’ she reminded him, though he was fairly sure she was lying and had probably let the guy Facebook stalk him. Which, whatever, considering he hadn’t used it in two and a half years. ‘But I think you’d like him. He has an MBA, he works for a tech company, he’s kind of boring, doesn’t have any feelings about sports or boats,’ she signed that with a grin only because she knew how much Chad loved both, ‘and he has Deaf parents.’

  Basil’s eyes narrowed. ‘But is he…’

  ‘No,’ she said, her fingers interrupting his own. ‘He’s CODA, though, and he’s cute and kind of uptight. Just the way you like them.’

  Licking his lips, he stared down at the paper again, then looked back at her. ‘I don’t think this is a good idea.’

  ‘One drink,’ she begged, then leaned over the desk and touched his chin to make sure she had his attention. ‘Please, just one drink. I promise if you hate everything about him, I’ll never bother you again. I’m just tired of you not letting yourself get out there just because you’re afraid. Not everyone is cruel. Most hearing people would never, ever do what Chad did.’

  ‘Enough of them do,’ he reminded her. He wasn’t the only person who had dealt with hearing ignorance, but the fact that she so readily chose to ignore it, or to overlook it, got under his skin.

  Her cheeks pinked and she shook her head. ‘Please.’

  After a long moment, he finally relented. The trouble was, he had been happy. Or at the very least, he’d been content. Every single day up to the moment he walked into that fucking vestibule, he’d been satisfied with his single life. Then, in t
he sweep of rolling thunder, it all changed. Now his entire being was consumed with wanting someone he couldn’t have because Derek was a bad idea all around.

  But this guy—Jay—this CODA tech guy who ran Deaf events, might have been the answer he was looking for. Because he’d take just about anything to get his mind off the one man he wouldn’t let himself consider.

  The problem with Denver was the same problem Basil discovered in Chicago, and in DC—you couldn’t escape the pretention of people’s desire to impress. No matter how down to earth or relaxed the community was, there was always something like this—a upstairs wine loft which served obscure labels and cheese boards covered in meats he didn’t like, and fruits dried beyond recognition. The fact that he could sit and converse with the relatively attractive man in his own language without having to worry about going slow or dumbing down his slang should have been a relief.

  Instead, Basil found himself staring at the guy’s exposed forearms, bared from rolled up shirt sleeves, and thinking about how all that pale flesh was just…boring. Basil hadn’t ever been a tattoo guy before—he’d never really thought about it, hadn’t paid much attention to people who sported them except to find himself occasionally distracted when he was trying to pay attention to their words, but now…

  ‘Are you okay?’

  Jay’s waved hand in his line of sight jolted him out of his thoughts, and he flushed a little, giving him an apologetic smile. ‘Sorry. It’s been a really long week,’ he told him. He forced himself to really look at the guy one more time, to search for a spark which wasn’t there, but maybe it could be if he tried hard enough. Ama hadn’t been wrong, the guy was good looking and intelligent. He was taller than Basil by an inch or so, thin but lithe enough he probably ran in the mornings, and his suit fit him like a second skin. His light brown hair sat styled in a prim part just to the side, and when he smiled, Basil saw neat and pearly white teeth.

  Nothing about him was offensive, but on the flip side, nothing about him was intriguing. He’d spent the first half of the date talking about his work at the tech company and how much good they were doing for the Deaf community as far as being offered access to relay devices, captioned phones, and devices to make the trips to the cinema easier. And Basil should have been thrilled by it all. Hell, he’d spent his first half of Freshman year attending every single protest he could make it to, demanding better accommodations and recognition for the Deaf. But something about Jay was exhausting, and even a little boring. Basil felt a little guilty for judging—it’s not like he’d gone into his own chosen career field, but the guy was as exciting as biting into a dry saltine.

  ‘How do you like the place?’ Jay asked him.

  Basil raised his brows in surprise, then shrugged. ‘I don’t usually eat at places like this, but Fairfield doesn’t really have a lot to offer.’

  ‘Small town life,’ Jay signed, and there was something like disdain on his face which made Basil bristle. ‘I’ve been there a few times, no Deaf community at all.’

  Basil wanted to argue that Fairfield didn’t have much of a community period. The people who lived there were either retired or owned businesses, and the rest of their busy life came from the bigger cities who wanted to drive out for the quaint ambiance. Still, Jay wasn’t entirely wrong. ‘It’s been a challenge,’ he admitted. ‘I could never figure out why my aunt liked it so much.’

  Jay pulled a face when he signed, ‘Your sister said she married a hearing man. Maybe she just wanted to assimilate.’

  The truth was, Basil didn’t know her well enough to even begin taking a guess, but the fact that Jay would feel he had the right to be judgmental over a member of his family that he had not only never met, but who had died, made his stomach feel twisted and sour. ‘Are you saying that’s bad?’

  Jay looked a little startled. ‘I thought you were against it. I mean, your sister seems bad enough, but from what she said about you, I figured we were on the same page.’

  Basil blinked at him. ‘You’re hearing.’

  ‘I’m CODA,’ Jay corrected, looking put out.

  Basil couldn’t help his snort of laughter. ‘But you’re still hearing. You don’t really have the right to decide if it’s a good or bad thing.’

  Jay’s jaw tightened and his hands flexed like he had an argument all prepared. Then, after a moment, he relaxed and his face gentled into a smile. Basil wasn’t a fool though, he could see the coldness that remained in his eyes and he knew this was doomed. Guys like Jay—guys who felt they had a right to speak where their voices weren’t wanted—they were a dime a dozen. He was wealthy and arrogant and dull, and nothing like the man Basil wished he was sitting there with.

  Hell, he had a feeling if the night had gone on with Derek, they wouldn’t have come to this place at all.

  ‘I didn’t mean to offend,’ Jay told him.

  Basil shrugged it off. There was no sense in fighting with him about it. ‘It’s fine. The truth is, I didn’t know my aunt very well, but she seemed to love it in Fairfield, and it’s started to grow on me.’

  Jay smiled, but it was a little tight. ‘So, no plans to get out?’

  Basil felt another wave of irritation at the question. There was a sort of condescending tone to his signs, an arrogance in the way he had said it, as though a small town wasn’t worthy of long-term plans. He hadn’t grown up in the place, but it was home for now, and he felt oddly protective. ‘I’m not sure,’ he finally answered.

  Jay looked at him, then laid one hand on the table and signaled to the server for the bill. Basil turned his gaze away, knowing that Jay knew how rude it was to do it right there in the middle of their dinner conversation, but he wanted to make a point.

  Suddenly, out of the corner of his eye, Basil caught a flash of bright color on skin, and he whipped his head around without thinking. A group of three people—one man and two women, all of them sporting colorfully inked skin—were being sat two tables over. When the man turned, Basil’s breath caught in his throat.

  Derek. It was Derek. Their eyes met and the guy smiled a little, but there was no recognition there. Before Basil could panic, he suddenly became aware of the different hair, of the tattoo on his neck and it hit him.

  That was Not-Derek. The twin.

  Relief hit him like a sack of bricks, and he forced himself to turn away before he made a spectacle of himself. He returned his attention to Jay who was staring at them openly with a look of disdain.

  ‘Disgusting,’ he signed. ‘How could a person do that to themselves?’

  ‘Tattoos?’ Basil asked.

  Jay’s expression deepened. ‘It’s trashy. Why would someone ruin their future like that? Someday they’ll want a real job and then where will they be?’

  Basil couldn’t help it, his laugh bubbled up and he felt it vibrating in his chest loud enough to draw attention from people around them, but he didn’t care. ‘What year are you living in? No one cares anymore. And I’m willing to bet those people aren’t miserable fucks like you. Thanks for dinner, I have to go.’

  He felt Jay swipe at him in an attempt to get his attention, but Basil was a lot faster and a lot more fit than he was. He managed to bob and weave through the crowd and he made it out of the loft and down a dark alley, hurrying to a long string of bars where he could get lost in the crowd for a while.

  He could make it to his car no problem, but he had a feeling Jay would be waiting, and after all that shit, he needed a drink. He picked the place with the loudest vibrations, then slapped a ten into the doorperson’s hand and went in. The dance floor was crowded, but the bar was nearly empty, so he whipped out his phone and typed his usual.

  Hi, I’m Deaf. Can I please have a vodka tonic with a lemon twist?

  The bartender glanced at his phone, then smiled up at him. ‘I know sign language if you want to sign with me?’

  Basil felt the tension in his chest unknot and wondered if the universe was doing him a kindness after that bullshit date. ‘Thank you. That�
��s great. It’s been a bad night.’

  The bartender—a good looking guy, tall and skinny, dark tawny skin and thick, straight hair combed into an elaborate pompadour—gave him a sympathetic smile. ‘Want to tell me about it? I can sign and work.’

  ‘You deaf?’ Basil couldn’t help but ask.

  ‘HOH,’ the guy signed with a shrug. ‘You?’

  ‘Deaf. My name’s Basil, and if you don’t mind, I would love to complain.’

  The guy chuckled as he twisted a lemon peel into Basil’s drink and handed it over. ‘I’m Amit,’ he signed, then offered his sign name. ‘Were they a local? Some of them aren’t so bad, but we get some awful ones from time to time. Too much mountain air.’

  Basil laughed as he took a drink and let the burn of alcohol soothe him. ‘He took me to a wine loft.’

  Amit pulled a face. ‘Terrible.’

  ‘The worst. He’s CODA, hearing, spent the entire date telling me what a gift he is to the Deaf Community for his tech work. Then he insulted Fairfield, then told me that everyone with tattoos is trash.’

  Amit’s eyes widened. He was called over to make a few more drinks as server’s tickets came pouring in, but he kept Basil’s gaze and signed fluidly with one hand. ‘I have twelve. You?’

  Basil shook his head. ‘None, but I met a guy who works in a shop in Fairfield and his work was gorgeous. The guy was a dick.’

  Amit’s face brightened and he pulled up the side of his shirt to reveal a bright red and orange phoenix cascading up his ribs. ‘I had this done there. Guy named Sage did it for me. Hurt worse than anything, but I love it. I know the place and they’re amazing guys.’

  Basil bit his lip, but he couldn’t help asking, ‘Did you meet a guy named Derek?’

  He wasn’t expecting Amit to smile and nod. ‘Yeah. Sage’s brother. Twins, but Derek does more Neo-Traditional work and Sage does a lot of geometric and abstract design. Sorry, I’m a tattoo nerd.’