Through Each Other's Eyes

by Aleena Ashe

  Darcy excused himself saying, “I’m just a bit chilly. I’ll just go get a shawl from my room and return shortly.” Once he was up the stairs, in the safety of Elizabeth’s room, he sat on the bed and wept. After all these years, it was finally over. He was free of Wickham and his insane need for revenge. Revenge for what? Darcy could only assume revenge for being born poor. The weight of so many years of disappointed hopes, worry for his loved ones, and feeling obligated to ‘help’ Wickham be a better man lifted from his shoulders. He sat another moment to revel in this newfound freedom, then collecting himself, he grabbed the shawl he had ostensibly come for, and returned to the parlor below.

  Chapter 23

  Darcy

  The next day saw Darcy and the Bennet sisters returning to the modiste’s for a final fitting. The ladies’ dresses all fit perfectly and so were packaged to be delivered later that afternoon. Darcy was particularly pleased with Elizabeth’s dress. It was flattering with a low-cut but not indecent square neckline that accentuated her figure without drawing undue attention. The cream color was complemented by the scrolling floral design in dark green with coquelicot flowers that lined the outer skirt and the center panel. The sleeves extended just past the elbow with a double layer of ruffles. As a subtle reminder, Darcy had requested pockets to be added. He smiled to himself, picturing how beautiful Elizabeth would be in this dress.

  While waiting for Mrs. Bennet to finalize her transactions, he strolled through store, looking at various ribbons and baubles. Seeing a rather ornate, pearl encrusted comb, Darcy knew it cost far more than Elizabeth would ever spend on herself. However, having seen the comb, he also knew it had been made for her. He asked for it to be gift wrapped quickly, wanting to stow it away in his reticule without Mrs. Bennet or the others noticing. This comb would be his first gift, among many, that he would give to Elizabeth. He would pay her back and more, once he was back to himself.

  ************

  Elizabeth

  Elizabeth spent most of the day in Darcy’s room. She had snuck some of Caroline’s thread and needles that had been left in the parlor and was using them to embroider handkerchiefs for Mr. Darcy. She wanted to give him something he could not buy for himself and she knew there was little a man like Mr. Darcy wanted for. So, she sat for hours yesterday and today to add the initials “F. D.” surrounded by some simple, fairly masculine scroll work in deep crimson.

  Looking at her completed work, she reclined back into his luxurious bed. “Ah, I could get used to this.” Before she realized it, she was fast asleep. Her dream was little more than a replay of her morning at Oakham Mount with Darcy. However, this time they were back in their own bodies and they didn’t stop at a kiss. They took their time exploring each other’s bodies. While she was familiar with his by now, it was very different touching Fitzwilliam, himself, with the intent to please. For his part, he seemed to be equally in awe. He was so gentle and yet, so passionate.

  When she awoke out of breathe, she vastly relieved to be alone at Netherfield where she was unlikely to be disturbed. She took a few minutes to collect herself, studiously avoiding any direct contact with that area of his body. It was not that she didn’t want to explore his body, she did - very much. She wanted to discover how every muscle reacted to her touch. She just wanted him to be a part of that exploration. Somehow, it would be less meaningful, almost cheap, to do so without him. When they finally came together, she wanted it to be perfect - for them both.

  Elizabeth decided that she needed some distraction. She left his room and went to find Bingley. Finding him in the billiard room, she picked up a cue and prepared to re-rack the table. “Charles. What is the word on Caroline? Is she recovering well?”

  “She is, she is! Much to my relief. She will likely be confined to a chair for a while yet, as she tires easily still. The doctor said she may well have permanent damage to her lungs. This morning when I checked on her she said she thought she would join us for dinner tonight.” Pausing to take his shot, he then added, “I think she must be tired of her room as much as anything else.”

  Watching Bingley run the table, she marveled at how confident he seemed. He was not always so sure of himself. It was nice to see this side of him. Jane had been good for him. She returned to the present conversation, “Very good. And have you heard from your Aunt Matilda?”

  “I have. She would love to host Caroline for the winter or longer if needed. She was also very amenable to Caroline bringing her own nursemaid. I explained that Jeana had an unusual situation. That her husband had recently been called to war and was killed soon after arriving on the continent and that we chose to keep her in our employ so she would be able to support the babe. Truth be told, I think the old bat is more excited to host the baby than she is Caroline!”

  “I don’t doubt it. How did Caroline take the news?”

  “Er, well… I plan to tell her tomorrow night before we go to the Bennet’s dinner party. She isn’t well enough to join us and I figured that way she could only rant and rave for so long before we would have to take our leave. Am I a coward?” he asked, a little afraid his friend would answer honestly that he was.

  “Not at all. Why should you let her berate you in your own home? She may be upset, but she will get over it. She brought this on herself. My only concern is, do you think she will agree to keep Jeana’s secret?”

  “I am not sure she will even know it is not true. She doesn’t usually take an interest in the lives of her servants. However, I plan to threaten her that if she does not accept Jeana, she will have no maid or nurse, or even a companion at Aunt Matilda’s. She will not argue, even if she doesn’t like the idea.”

  Dinner that night was a subdued affair. Miss Bingley had entered the room on the arm of her brother, leaning heavily on his support. Elizabeth was shocked by the change in Miss Bingley. Not only did she look physically frail, but her demeanor had altered greatly as well. She seemed almost… shy or humbled.

  She took her seat at the table, next to Darcy, and to Elizabeth’s further surprise, she hardly spoke a word. Elizabeth tried to balance the desire to be cordial with the stronger desire not to encourage a reappearance of her earlier attentions toward the gentleman. Louisa who was glad to have her sister’s company again - she had not been allowed in the sick room due to her condition - ended up monopolizing much of Miss Bingley’s conversation.

  Foregoing the separation of the sexes, they all gathered in the parlor after the meal. Bingley escorted his sister to a chair by the fire and placed a blanket over her lap. After a scant 30 minutes, Caroline yawned and expressed her wish to retire for the evening. Louisa, being early in her pregnancy, added her own wish to retire and implored Mr. Hurst to help them both to their rooms. However, Elizabeth caught a look that passed between the expectant parents and thought they likely had other plans for the evening that did not include sleep. Someday, she thought to herself that will be me.

  *********

  Darcy

  That night, after dinner at Longbourn, Mr. Bennet asked Lizzy to join him in his study. Seeing the confused look on his daughter’s face, he attempted to soothe her fears. “Don’t worry Lizzy. You are not in trouble. But I do have some questions I want to ask of you.”

  Swallowing hard and hoping not to betray his extreme discomfort, Darcy simply replied, “Of course, Papa.”

  Once in his study, Mr. Bennet did not beat around the bush. “You and Mr. Darcy appear to have grown closer.” It was not a question. “I have to say I like the young man, but I had been under the impression you did not... Clearly something has changed.” He chewed on the end of his pipe, apparently thinking over his next words. “It seems to me this change came about around the same time as the Netherfield ball.” Also, not a question. Darcy sat nervously, silently waiting for Mr. Bennet continue.

  Smiling, Mr. Bennet went on, “I see you’re not going to take pity on your poor, old Papa. What I want to know is, has Mr. Darcy made his intentions known to you?”

&nb
sp; Despite himself, a broad smile spread across Darcy’s face. “Oh well… in a manner of speaking, yes. He has told me that he loves me.”

  “He has told you that he loves you? But he has not asked for your hand? I am not sure how I feel about that, Lizzy.” Mr. Bennet sat in his chair, a mixture of emotions swirling through him. He had known whilst watching them play chess that she was no longer his little girl. She had given her heart away.

  “And you… return his feelings?”

  Standing because he couldn’t remain seated while expressing his feelings, “Yes, Papa. I do. You’re right, something did change that night. I am not sure I can even explain it. But…”

  “That’s quite alright, dear. I too was once a young fool in love. However, I will expect your Mr. Darcy to apply to me for a private audience, sooner rather than later.”

  “Yes, Sir. I think he is just waiting for the ‘right time’ to do so.”

  Nodding, Mr. Bennet narrowed his eyes at his daughter. “That is all well and good but he best not wait too long or I may begin to think his intentions are not honorable.” Then he opened his arms to his favorite daughter and beckoned her to come. Darcy hesitated only a moment and then stepped into Mr. Bennet’s open arms. Whilst he never would have thought to have done so as himself, Darcy silently conceded that Mr. Bennet’s loving embrace of his daughter was comforting. He had often missed his parents’ affection, freely given (at least until his mother had passed away). After a few moments, Mr. Bennet released him saying, “Off you go dear. Leave your sentimental ol’ papa to the comfort of his books.”

  Darcy left the room, filled to overflowing with hope and joy. If Mr. Bennet approved, there would be no obstacles… save one. I wish to ask for Elizabeth’s hand the right way… as myself. I don’t want her to feel in any way obligated because we seem stuck with each other. I want her to know she has a choice.

  Chapter 24

  Darcy

  The next day was the dinner party to celebrate Mary’s and Charlotte’s engagements. However, Mrs. Bennet’s focus was on Mary alone, much to the young lady’s chagrin. But Mrs. Bennet’s pride would not let her be anything less than a thorough hostess and so, every possible detail was seen to to celebrate both ladies. The meal would be decadent with three full courses, each encompassing a variety of choices from which her guests could choose.

  Darcy noticed that while Mrs. Bennet spent the day giving orders for this and that to be done - doing so loudly and often repeatedly - that all was prepared well in advance of the guests arrival, leaving plenty of time to fret over what the girls would all wear. The older girls, of course, were to wear their new dresses (there would be eligible gentlemen present after all) and the youngest had been given leave to retrim their best dresses with new ribbons for the occasion. The result of so much preparation was not as Darcy expected - an overly ostentatious affair - rather it was a delightful evening with everyone looking and feeling quite marvelous.

  At the appointed hour, the guests began to arrive. The Lucases were first bringing Mr. Paulson with them. He was a tall man, very thin and quiet but with a decided air of intelligence about him. Though he didn’t speak often, what he did say was astute and even, on occasion clever. Darcy concluded that he would be a very good complement to Charlotte.

  Some ten minutes later, Darcy began to shift his weight back and forth, impatiently looking at the parlor doors while waiting for the Netherfield party to arrive. When they finally did, Darcy noted it that both Charles and Elizabeth looked a bit out of sorts. Introductions were made and Elizabeth soon joined with the group of three while Charles found Jane. And though he wanted to pull her aside to ask if everything was alright, she soon allayed his fears. “I apologize for our tardiness. Miss Bingley had thought to join us but at the last minute, was just too tired. She has not yet recovered from her recent illness.” Elizabeth gave Darcy a meaningful look indicating there was more to tell but at a later time.

  Dinner was served, all were suitably impressed, and toasts were made to the happy couples. Lady Lucas turned to Mary and Mr. Collins and asked, “Have you set a date yet? Charlotte has planned a spring wedding, haven’t you my dear?”

  Caught off guard in being addressed, Charlotte almost choked on her bite of mutton but after a quick sip of wine she recovered enough to nod. “Yes, we had thought to marry just before Easter.”

  Lady Lucas turned back to Mary, “And you, dear?”

  Mr. Collins interrupted, “We are to wed within the month so that my bride can join me in service to our parishioners as quickly as possible.”

  “I still say a wedding should not be planned in such haste, but no one seems to think my opinions are important. I am just your mother…” Mrs. Bennet lamented.

  “Mother, we talked about this. If I am to be a clergyman’s wife, I need to be of service to both God and man. It is more important that I am there to serve those in need that it is for me to have a large wedding. Besides, the money wasted on these extravagant affairs really is quite ridiculous.” Then seeming to realize the unintended insult that others may have perceived, she turned to Charlotte, “I don’t mean to say your wedding will be a waste. I am sure it will be beautiful and… I’m sorry. You know I am just not one for the attention.”

  Charlotte - ever gracious - just smiled. “I know, Mary. I am not the least bit offended. In fact, I don’t want a large wedding myself but Mr. Paulson is quite the social butterfly so it seems I cannot escape it!” At this Mr. Paulson protested and the room dissolved into laughter.

  While everyone else was distracted with that end of the table, Darcy took the opportunity to find and squeeze Elizabeth’s hand under the table. Leaning over just enough to ensure only she would hear him, he said, “I need to speak with you later.” She gave a small nod and they rejoined the rest of the table’s merriment.

  After the meal they chose not to separate and, instead, adjourned to the parlor. Slowly but surely, larger groups broke into smaller groups and eventually the couples were able to find their way to the more isolated corners of the room. Mr. Bennet and Sir William Lucas went to his study to get away and play chess. Lady Lucas and Mrs. Bennet sat drinking tea and gossiping happily, oblivious to the rest of the room. The three youngest escaped to Lydia’s bedroom probably to talk about soldiers. And Mary went to the pianoforte with Mr. Collins promising to faithfully turn pages for her.

  Elizabeth looked at Darcy. They both had much to say but not in the presence of others. Looking around and seeing that everyone was engrossed in their own conversations, she whispered, “Follow my lead.”

  Standing, she walked over to the terrace doors and opened them. “It’s a bit warm in here. Do you mind if I open the doors?” She said this to no one in particular.

  Catching on Darcy followed, “Of course.” No one seemed to hear or notice them. They spoke for a few more minutes before quietly inching their way out onto the terrace but the doors remained open for propriety’s sake. The air was crisp but not bitter. A thousand stars could be seen and the moon was full and high.

  Not wasting any time - because who knew how long they had - Darcy began. “I wanted to wait. I wanted you to choose based solely on your feelings, but it seems I cannot. I must ask you: Elizabeth, you hold my heart. You are my future. Even before fate intervened, I knew I could love no other.” Taking her hand in his, “Elizabeth Francis Bennet, will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

  She laughed through the tears of joy that began to fall, “Yes!” She wiped her eyes and couldn’t help but tease, “but only if you promise never call me ‘Francis’ again.”

  Laughing, he quickly drew her into his embrace and kissed her passionately. It was perfect, magical even. When they pulled apart, both were filled with awe as they looked above them at the shower of stars streaking across the sky. It looked almost like fireworks there were so many. He chuckled softly, “It appears the heavens approve.”

  At the sound of his deep, baritone voice, Elizabeth started. “Fitzwilliam,
we have switched back!” Looking down into her eyes, he marveled at the depth of feeling he saw in them. Pulling her to him, he reveled in the feel of having her in his arms. Placing both hands on her cheeks, he lowered his lips to hers. This time when he kissed her it was a longer, more passionate kiss. The kiss he had been yearning for for so long.

  “Ahem!”

  Startled, they jumped apart and turned to see Mr. Bennet standing in the doorway. “I certainly hope you are planning to come to my study in a moment, young man.”

  Groaning inwardly that he would have to sit through a second interview, he looked Mr. Bennet in the eyes. “Yes, Sir. I certainly am.”

  Turning to go back inside, Mr. Bennet said over his shoulder, “I’ll expect you shortly, then.” While he was not loud or demonstrative, Darcy knew Mr. Bennet meant to see his Lizzy was treated with respect.

  In their remaining moments, Darcy looked at Elizabeth. “My love, you are so beautiful.” He placed a soft kiss on the back of her hand. “You’ve made me the happiest of men, Elizabeth. And I promise, for the rest of my life, I will strive to ensure that you have all you need to make you happy.”