Fragile (Rock Stars & Romance Book 1)

by A. K. Evans

  Maybe because it was different now.

  Maybe because I’d finally admitted what I’d been so afraid to admit before.

  This man was everything I never thought I’d want. I had been so focused on who I thought he was that I missed feeling this. And while it still terrified me to think that I’d risk my heart with someone like him, I couldn’t deny it any longer.

  I wanted to give him the chance to change my mind about men.

  I wanted him to show me that this was about so much more than just having a warm body in his bed.

  I wanted him to make me believe that a real, honest, and genuine man existed.

  Watching Cash on stage, hearing his voice, I wanted him to prove that he was that man for me.

  Cash

  Anticipation.

  I thought that the feeling I got before we released a new album was untouchable. Never did I think I would ever feel something that came even remotely close to that level.

  The energy and excitement had been buzzing through me for more than twenty-four hours now.

  Ever since Demi told me she wanted to video chat with me tonight after we performed, I felt like I’d been unable to think about anything else.

  It was a wonder I could even get on stage and perform tonight.

  Even that felt different tonight.

  Just when I believed I’d gotten used to the eager feeling, I stepped out on that stage and something else moved through me. I didn’t know what it was. I couldn’t explain it.

  But if there was one thing I did know for sure, it was that Demi was absolutely the reason behind why I just had my best performance ever.

  With a crowd of twenty thousand people, it would have been easy to give them the credit. No doubt they helped, but that wasn’t what it was.

  It was her.

  It was the promise of her.

  It was knowing that I was finally going to be able to see her for the first time in weeks, even if it was only through a screen.

  I hadn’t ever felt this energetic and alive before.

  Coming from someone who lived a life that took him all over the world to perform for sold-out crowds, that was saying something. And what it told me was that Demi was meant to be someone special in my life.

  I needed to do whatever I had to do to make sure I didn’t screw this up with her.

  I’d just made it back to our dressing room, and it was clear everyone else was running on the same high.

  “There’s nothing quite like performing at home,” Killian declared.

  “Agreed. That vibe was crazy tonight,” Beck added. “Cash, man, you were on fire.”

  “Yeah, you were,” Holland agreed. “What got into you tonight?”

  Did I tell them? Should I let them know that the whole reason I was ‘on fire’ tonight was because I couldn’t stop thinking about Demi.

  My Violent Heart was good. I knew we were good.

  But had my ways all this time held us back from being the best we could be?

  Before I could answer, Beck joked, “It was the best performance we’ve ever had, and Cash didn’t even need to take his shirt off.”

  Shit.

  When everyone had their eyes on me, I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe it was a fluke. Or, it’s like Killian said. It’s just something about being home. I can’t really explain it, but something just felt different when I stepped out on the stage tonight.”

  I was glad that they all felt the same high I was feeling, but I didn’t want to take credit for how everything went tonight.

  “Didn’t you guys all feel it, too?” I asked.

  “We felt it, Cash, but it wasn’t us that made it happen like that tonight,” Roscoe offered. “Tonight was what it was because of you.”

  I didn’t know what to say.

  Tonight felt like the perfect time to celebrate with my band. Something incredible had happened tonight, and I truly believed it wasn’t wise to just overlook it.

  But I didn’t want to bail on Demi.

  I knew she was the reason I had done so well tonight.

  I wasn’t going to not have that call with her tonight, but maybe I could delay it for just a little bit longer.

  “Why don’t we go out for a bit and celebrate this?” I suggested.

  “No!” Holland yelled.

  Stunned by her reaction, everyone’s eyes turned toward her.

  “What’s going on?” Walker asked her.

  Shaking her head, she insisted, “Nothing. I just… I just think that maybe we shouldn’t jinx it. Tonight was good. Great. The best ever. But Cash hasn’t been going out regularly lately. Maybe that’s why tonight was what it was.”

  She made a valid point.

  I’d been spending as much time as I could talking to Demi.

  And I’d just admitted that I needed to do whatever I needed to do to not screw it up with her. Delaying that call to her probably wasn’t a smart idea.

  “We can plan a barbecue or something like that while we’re home for these few days, but I don’t think we should go out tonight,” Holland added.

  “I’m going out,” Killian announced. “I’m not going to let this feeling go to waste.”

  “Same here,” Roscoe said.

  “I’ll go,” Beck remarked. “I told my sister I was going to stop by and visit her tomorrow after I go see my mom. Sadie was bummed she couldn’t make it to tonight’s show, so I want to take her out tomorrow afternoon and do something to cheer her up. Plus, I need to take her out for her birthday since we’ll be on tour, and I’m going to miss the actual day this year.”

  Walker cleared his throat. “I’m calling it quits here tonight,” he started before turning his attention to Holland. “You’ll let me know what you figure out for a barbecue? I’m definitely down for that.”

  Her worried eyes went to his, and she nodded. “Yeah. I’ll work it out and let everyone know the details tomorrow.”

  “We can do it at my place,” I offered. “Anytime you want works for me.”

  “Okay.”

  “You going to come out with us tonight, Cash?” Beck asked.

  I thought a moment. I did. I really did.

  But I’d made a commitment to Demi. If I was a changed man, I needed to follow through on the promise I made.

  I shook my head and answered, “No, I think I’m going to head home tonight.”

  “You sure?” Killian pressed.

  I nodded.

  At that, I got to work on gathering up my things and getting ready to head out. After saying goodbye to everyone, I took off.

  Twenty minutes later, I was finally back home.

  Now that I’d made the decision to follow through on my original plans for the night, I thought it was wise to reach out to Demi ahead of time.

  Me: Hey, I just got back home. I’m going to hop in the shower quick. I’ll call you in five. Does that work?

  I set the phone down on the sink in my bathroom and started stripping. I’d just barely gotten all my clothes off when I heard the chime of an incoming text.

  Demi: That’s perfect.

  I smiled at the phone.

  Normally, I would have spent some time lingering in the shower after a show, but I wasn’t going to do that tonight. I had waited long enough.

  As quickly as I could, I did what I had to do and got out. After toweling myself off, I pulled on a pair of loose, gray sweats.

  Just as I settled them on my hips and prepared to go get my phone, my doorbell rang.

  Fuck.

  At this hour of the night, I couldn’t imagine who would be stopping by. Unless, of course, one of my bandmates found it easier to crash at my place instead of making their way to their own. This wouldn’t be the first time that happened.

  Instead of checking my outdoor camera to see who was here, I just went to the door.

  When I opened it up, I received the shock of my life.

  “Demi,” I gasped.

  “Hi, Cash.”

  I blinked in surp
rise. “What… what are you doing here?” I asked.

  “I missed you, too,” she admitted, her voice hoarse.

  It took me a moment to come to grips with the fact that Demi was standing right there in front of me, close enough to touch.

  Close enough to touch, I thought.

  I reached out to her and demanded, “Come here.”

  Demi didn’t hesitate to fly forward into my chest. While keeping one arm firmly around her back, I used the other to close the door and lock it.

  Once I had both arms around her, she tipped her head back and looked up at me.

  “What is it?” I asked, seeing the strange expression on her face.

  She swallowed hard before she begged, “Please don’t break my heart, Cash.”

  With that, she pressed up on her toes and touched her lips to mine.

  Just like that, I was gone.

  Fifteen

  Demi

  Why had I waited?

  Why did I hold back?

  For far too long, fear had consumed every part of my being and prevented me from doing something that felt this natural.

  Just one touch of my lips against Cash’s lips was all it took.

  Heat and desire flooded me. Desperation took over, and it felt as though I couldn’t get close enough. I couldn’t touch enough.

  My moans filled the air as Cash claimed my mouth in an all-consuming kiss. It was hot, deep, and wet.

  And the way his arms and hands held me—like he never wanted to let me go—felt like he was telling me he’d be sure to do just as I had asked him.

  He wouldn’t break my heart.

  The front of my body plastered against his, my hands drove into his hair until they reached the back of his skull. Cash had moved his arms from around me and brought both of his hands up my body. One drove into my hair while the other landed just beneath my jaw, curling around the side of my throat.

  Allowing my tongue to sweep into the warm recesses of his mouth, I tasted the man I’d fantasized about for weeks now. And I did it as he spun me around and backed me up against the wall.

  I couldn’t even begin to comprehend how he kissed. It was far beyond any expectations I had. If I wasn’t so caught up in how good this was already, I might have questioned whether or not I could even hold a candle to that level of kissing.

  When another moan tore up my throat, Cash pulled his mouth away from mine.

  His forehead was just inches from mine, and he was staring me in the eyes. “What are you doing here?” he asked, his voice low and husky.

  I didn’t hesitate to answer him honestly. “I’m risking it all.”

  The intense, heated look on his face faltered, and I instantly regretted saying those words. Just as he parted his lips to speak, I pleaded, “Not now, Cash. I just want to feel good right now.”

  Cash wavered for all of a few seconds before he captured my mouth again. I couldn’t have been more grateful he didn’t push to talk.

  That was the last thing I wanted to do right now.

  I didn’t want to talk. I knew if we did, it’d lead to painful discussions that would put a halt to this. And I absolutely did not want to risk not having this with Cash.

  We could talk later.

  I’d discuss it all with him if he wanted to know it.

  But right now, I just wanted him.

  I’d been yearning for this for days now, and the minute I made the decision to come to Pennsylvania to see him, the anticipation and longing grew tenfold.

  I didn’t even know how I made it through the performance earlier tonight. He was amazing on stage, and I wondered if I’d missed that when the band played at Granite because I’d been so caught up in trying to protect myself from a man who seemed, at least for now, to want to change for me.

  God, I hoped he was serious.

  Unable to control myself, I began kissing Cash’s naked torso and allowing my hands to roam over the smooth skin of his chest. I moved to one side, brought my mouth to his nipple, and tipped my head back to look up at him as I swirled my tongue around it.

  His hand put a bruising grip on my hip and he groaned.

  Somehow, I managed to push my back away from the wall and turn so that Cash’s back took my place there.

  I kissed his mouth once more before moving down his body. I ran my mouth over his broad shoulders and spanning chest. I licked his nipples again as I felt him squeeze my biceps when I did. My mouth moved down his abdomen and trailed along the skin toward his hip, where there was the unmistakable beginning of the V, which disappeared beneath his gray sweats.

  Seeing him in those sweats, I realized it was a thing.

  A pair of gray sweats slung low on the hips of a man like Cash was the kind of thing that could make a girl forget she ever had any worries in her life.

  And considering Cash’s sweats weren’t just showing a bulge but a rather impressive erection instead, I thought I was a very lucky girl.

  Wanting to tease him, I tipped my chin up, looked at him through hooded eyes, and curled my fingers around his hardened length. Gripping him tightly through his pants, I asked, “Is this for me?”

  “Jesus, fuck,” he hissed. “You’re incredible.”

  I smiled at him.

  There was one sweet moment that followed as his hand came up to the side of my face, captured a lock of hair between his fingers, and pushed it away.

  No sooner had he done that when I could no longer prevent myself from allowing the clean, masculine scent of him to push me to drop to my knees. My hands went to the sweats at his hips and yanked them down his legs.

  I watched as his cock sprang free, jutting out from between the tops of his legs, and licked my lips.

  He was perfect.

  His penis was perfect.

  Beautiful.

  Long, thick, and very, very hard.

  I tilted my head back one last time to look up at him. The moment our eyes locked, Cash rasped, “You’re so fucking beautiful. I could come just looking at you like that.”

  Feeling like I was on top of the world, I reached my hand out and curled my fingers around the base of his cock. Then I brought my lips to the tip, parted them slightly, and slowly took him in my mouth.

  I kept my eyes on his just a bit longer and was overcome with emotion at the intensity of his stare. It was as though having my mouth on him was his every wish come true. Seeing that only encouraged me to continue.

  For the next several moments, I focused all of my effort on giving him pleasure. My hand held him firmly while my tongue glided along the velvety soft skin of his hardened length. Initially, I had only allowed my mouth to cover little more than just the tip. But once I’d had my fill of teasing him, I parted my lips again and took as much of him as I could into my mouth.

  The sound that came from him as a result was gratifying. He was loving everything about this.

  All I wanted at that moment was to give him more.

  So I did.

  I worked him hard. My jaw began to feel the effects of it, but I didn’t care. I wanted to give this to him.

  My free hand had moved from its place on his thigh to his hip. The moment it landed there, Cash’s hand covered it.

  And as I continued to suck and lick and tease and taste, the pressure his hand and fingers put on mine alternated. It went from soft and delicate to hard and bruising.

  I hadn’t gotten anywhere near enough of him when he was suddenly no longer in my mouth. Cash had pulled his hips back, bent down, and lifted me up under my arms. He dragged my body up along his, captured me behind the head with one hand, and planted his other firmly on my ass.

  “You’re remarkable, firecracker,” he praised me just before he took my mouth. He kissed me in a way that communicated his appreciation for what I’d just done for him. I was simply grateful he had a solid grip on my ass because I would have surely melted into a puddle at the heat and building desire I felt. When Cash gave a gentle tug back on my hair and separated his mouth from mine, h
e added, “I’ve fantasized about this mouth from the very first day I saw you. Now that I’ve experienced the real deal, the things I’d do for this mouth border on criminal.”

  “Cash,” I whispered.

  He spun me around and pressed me up against the wall before he smiled and said, “It’s my turn to have a taste.”

  For the next several moments, I waged a war within my body. Part of me was caught up in what he was doing while the other part of me was struggling to remain standing.

  Cash’s mouth left mine, and his lips trailed down my throat toward my chest as his hands began tugging at my clothing. It was clear the material was in his way, and he wanted access immediately.

  I would have helped, but I couldn’t.

  I was too far gone, lost in the feel of having him near me like this.

  Kissing me.

  Touching me.

  Somehow, he managed to get my clothes off so that all I was wearing was a sexy bra and a G-string.

  Yes, I planned for this, and the last thing I was going to do was have him see me naked for the first time wearing a pair of full-bottomed cotton underwear.

  No way.

  I was going for seductive.

  I wanted his heart pounding in his chest at the sight of me.

  Truthfully, if he had been experiencing any of this the same as I was, his heart started pounding right about the time he opened the door.

  For a brief moment, Cash stepped back and looked at me. My upper back was leaning against the wall, my hips pushed forward. My body was mostly on display, and Cash stood there completely unabashed by his nakedness as he allowed his eyes to roam over me. He made no secret of the fact that he liked what he saw.

  “How are you this beautiful?” he asked, his tone ragged. “Are you even real?”

  Cash didn’t give me a chance to respond. He closed the distance between us and yanked the cup of my bra down to expose my breast. His large hand caught the soft, rounded flesh as his mouth descended on it.

  Wetness pooled between my thighs as his tongue teased my nipple. His free hand unhooked my bra with expert-like ease before reaching up to the strap at my shoulder and pulling it down my arm.