Special

by Chino Chakanga

  ‘There was this bad guy in a mask Titan was fighting—‘ Cody continued.

  ‘Your hands,’ Dad said gently caressing Cody’s bandaids.

  ‘I hurt myself trying to help Mum,’ Cody said. ‘I wasn’t strong enough though. Titan helped me but the bad guy got away.’

  ‘I’m just glad you’re all right,’ Dad said, hugging Cody once more. ‘You’re pretty brave.’

  Dad walked over to me. He hugged me. ‘Are you all right?’ he asked looking me over.

  ‘Yeah,’ I assured him. He hugged me tight. He kissed me on the forehead and proceeded to check on Mum. He looked her over and hugged her. He looked her over again. His eye stopped on her forehead. He ran his fingers over her bruise.

  ‘I’ll be fine,’ Mum told him.

  They hugged once more.

  ***

  ‘Hope!’ I heard my name called as I walked through the school hallway to class. I looked over my shoulder. Eric rushed up to me.

  ‘Hi,’ he said.

  ‘Hi.’

  Eric walked with me to class.

  ‘I had a look at The Hunter’s Curse,’ He said.

  ‘Really? What’d you think about it?’

  ‘It’s deeper than I expected. The underlying theme of fate is brilliant. Dido is a great protagonist. It’s definitely much better than the movie adaptation. It doesn’t follow the typical trope of the brooding bad boy the movie makes out Alex to be. I like that he’s more complex.’

  We entered Math class and stood at my desk.

  ‘I know,’ I said. ‘It’s very thought provoking.’

  ‘Dido is so naive and self deprecating that it’s funny.’

  ‘She is,’ Eric laughed.

  ‘Her inner dialogue made the story corny and paradoxical in the lighter moments especially during the “mating” scenes,’ Eric chortled.

  ‘Yeah definitely,’ I chuckled.

  Allie, Izzy, Rory and Christie walked past us to the back row. Allie’s eyes caught mine for a brief moment. Her look was piercing enough to lower my mood.

  ‘Um, I was wondering—’ he started.

  ‘Good day class,’ our math teacher, Mrs Allen interrupted as she walked in. She picked up a chalk and began to write an equation on the board.

  ‘What was it you wanted to ask?’

  ‘Oh um, just, uh, just wondering what you thought of the Greek origin story,’ he stuttered.

  ‘It was very original and unique compared to other vampire origin stories.’

  ‘Yeah,’ he nodded.

  ‘You should definitely check out the prequel,’ I advised. ‘The tone is—.’

  ‘Take your seat Eric,’ Mrs Allen instructed.

  ‘I’ll check it out,’ he said before walking to his desk.

  ‘Who can tell me what this is?’ Mrs Allen asked referring to the equation she had written on the chalkboard.

  I caught Allie’s stare as I sat down. She shifted her attention towards the chalkboard the instant our eyes met.

  ***

  A grating of drills and hammers reverberated through the hospital when Mum and I entered. Dr Graham had requested to see us a day earlier than my scheduled treatment. Scaffolds were erected around the main entrance, the hole in the ceiling torn by Titan and Gelder and where the pillar had stood. The rubble had all been cleared. A board noting that the second, third and fourth left wings of the hospital were under repair stood at the centre. Below it was a list displaced offices, doctors and their temporary offices. Mum examined it. There was no listing for Dr Graham We walked over to the reception desk where a nurse held a phone over her ear. She smiled to acknowledge us and spoke into the phone.

  ‘Friday is open,’ she said operating the computer. ‘Yes… yes… I’ll do so. Have a great day.’

  She hung up and turned her attention to us. ‘Good afternoon. How can I help?’

  ‘Hi,’ Mum said. ‘We have an appointment for Hope Goodman. We’re here to see Dr Graham but he’s not listed on the notice board.’

  ‘Oh yes, sorry about that,’ the nurse apologised. ‘We’re still updating it.’

  She typed something into the computer. He’s operating from the fifth floor. ‘Paige!’ she called at a nurse that walked by. ‘You mind escorting them to Dr Grahams office?’

  ‘Sure,’ Paige said. Paige came over and asked us to follow her. Mum thanked the reception nurse. We followed Paige. We waited for a few people to get out of the lift and got in. Paige hit the fifth floor button. The lift smelled of plaster and paint. There was a protective matt and some protective sheets wrapped around the walls.

  ‘It’s a bit chaotic at the moment with the repairs,’ Paige said.

  ‘Looks like the damage was very intensive,’ Mum said.

  ‘It was. Repairs might take two months. Luckily no one was seriously hurt.’

  The lift beeped and the lift doors opened to the fifth floor. We exited There were caution signs and tape down the hallway to the left wing.

  ‘This way,’ Paige said.

  We followed her down the hallway to the right. A prominent notice board read Paediatrics. We followed her past a few offices and made a few turns. Most of the offices had sandblasted glass walls. We passed an open office clear class. Inside there was some toys and play sets. We stopped at an office a few doors down. The door was open. Dr Graham went through a shelf. There were a few boxers around the floor and one on his desk.

  ‘Dr Graham, you have visitors,’ Paige said.

  ‘Thank you,’ Dr Graham told her.

  ‘Come on in?’ he told us.

  Mum thanked Paige as she left.

  Dr Graham got a chair from the corner of the office and placed it next to the one in front of his desk. He asked us to sit and removed the box from his desk.

  ‘Excuse the mess,’ he said when we were all seated.

  ‘No problem. I hear the damage was very extensive,’ Mum said.

  ‘Yes, the repairs might take weeks. Had to move my entire office for the time being.’

  ‘Do they know what the robber wanted?’ Mum asked.

  ‘Yes,’ Dr Graham said. His tone was grave. ‘It’s actually the reason I asked you here today. I called you as soon as I found out. The hospital and Investigators are certain that only Hope’s treatment records and blood samples were stollen.’

  Mum had a few questions. I tuned out at the mention of my blood. What would anyone want with my abnormal blood?

  Chapter 17

  My neurological disorder was unique, aetiology unknown. It could not be cured or treated with conventional methods, so most of the treatments were experimental and unorthodox. Before Dr Graham’s treatment, I had undergone a series of treatments that aimed at improving my Severe AD through the regulation of my gut microbiota. Extensive meta-analysis had confirmed a two-way linkage between gut health and the operation of the central nervous system, but also identified differences in gut function that were primarily found in people with ADSD. The overgrowth of bad bacteria in the gut inevitably led to an overproduction of by-products – including toxins. These could make the gut lining more permeable. Toxins, by-products and even undigested food could then get into the bloodstream and travel to the brain. In a child under three years old, whose brain was at the height of development, the presence of these chemicals could impair neurodevelopment, leading to ADSD. The series of treatments aimed at regulating my gut microbiota included taking probiotics, prebiotics, changing my diet to gluten and casein-free and a Faecal Microbiota Transplant.

  The Faecal Microbiota Transplant or FMT was the most debasing treatment I agreed to. It required the administration of a donated stool sample from someone with a healthy diverse community of gut bacteria to a patient with an overgrowth of bad bacteria via a faecal enema. In my case the donor was Mum. The thought of it made me cringe.

  ***

  I could feel the eyes on me the moment I entered school. Two girls stole a glimpse at me and murmured something to each other. Heads turned as I walked down the Ha
llway. Maybe I had something on my face or hair, I thought. I rubbed my face and combed my hair with my hands.

  I was amongst the first in English class. Mrs McKinley was busy erasing the blackboard when the rest of the students flooded in.

  ‘Have the shrinks figured out what’s wrong with you yet?’ Izzy mocked as the adroit walked past my desk.

  Christie and Rory giggled. Allie was silent.

  ‘I’d be screwed up too if I had poop shoved up my bum and I was so pathetic my little brother put me in ICU,’ Izzy said for everyone to hear.

  The back row cackled with laughter.

  ‘Quiet down,’ Mrs McKinley said.

  ***

  ‘Earth to Hope.’ Mr Cleary called.

  ‘Yeah,’ I responded.

  ‘Are you with us?’

  I nodded. My head was a million miles away. Izzy’s taunts plagued me the whole day. Enough to disrupt my attention. What bothered me most was that Allie told.

  ***

  I noticed Allie walking into the girls room after lunch and followed her. She rinsed her hands in the sink when I entered.

  ‘You told the adroit about my treatments?’ I demanded.

  Allie looked up. She stared at me in reflection of the mirror in front of her, but she didn’t respond.

  My heart raced, and my voice trembled.

  ‘Are you that desperate to fit in?’ my voice trembled.

  Allie closed the tap and turned around to face me.

  ‘It just slipped out. It’s no big deal. Why are you so upset?’

  Izzy exited one of the stalls. She washed her hands in a sink next to Allie.

  My voice broke as I said, ‘I never thought you would talk about me behind my back. What’s it gonna be next? You also gonna start calling me names?’

  ‘I gotta get to class,’ Allie said before exiting the bathroom.

  I swallowed hard to clear the lump in my throat. I fought hard to restrain the tears forming in my eyes. I flinched as Izzy flicked her wet hands in my face, spraying me with droplets of water.

  ‘Out of the way Hopeless!’ She mocked as she manoeuvred around me to get to the paper towel dispenser on the wall beside me. I remained frozen in place unable to move, anchored by the weight of Allie’s betrayal.

  ***

  Mum, Cody, and I sat down for dinner. Cody animatedly entertained us with a story from school. I, however, could not pay much attention. I picked at and nibbled on my food throughout dinner. I barely ate more than five bites.

  ‘How was your day?’ Mum asked.

  I was so absorbed in my thoughts that I didn’t realise she was talking to me.

  ‘Hope?’

  ‘Yeah,’ I finally answered.

  ‘How was your day?’

  ‘It was okay,’ I said.

  ‘Just ok?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  Mum didn’t pry.

  I continued to pick at my food.

  ‘Who wants dessert?’ Mum asked.

  ‘Me!’ Cody enthused.

  ‘All right,’ Mum said, ‘help me clear up these plates first.’

  Mum didn’t have to ask twice. There was a gust of wind and motion blurs towards and from the kitchen. Within seconds, the dining table was cleared. The only piece of cutlery left was the fork in my hand. Using a super-speed ability, Cody had cleared up the table.

  ‘All done!’ Cody said out of breath. He was back in his chair. His hair was dishevelled as though he had been swept through a tornado.

  ‘One… dessert coming up!’ Mum said.

  She looked at me with concern before heading into the kitchen.

  ***

  I laid in bed staring at the ceiling. I couldn’t being myself to sleep. I looked at my alarm clock. It was past midnight. I switched on the nightlight and climbed out of bed. I rummaged through my nightstand for my pain killers. I took one in hopes that the mellow high might put me to sleep. It worked. In a few minutes I felt began to feel numb. I crawl back to bed and closed my eyes.

  ***

  The next day wasn’t any different. I received overt stares and snickering the minute I walked into school.

  My life became a vicious cycle of looking forward to lunch so I could retreat to the barren sports field where I would barely touch my lunch.

  After lunch I would look forward to the solitude of my room.

  I fell behind in class.

  I would have trouble falling asleep at night. My mind would race for hours. I would remain awake and only find solace with the aid of one or sometimes two painkillers.

  For the next few weeks, this became my life.

  ***

  I examined my lower back in the mirror. My skin crawled at the sight of my mortified flesh. My rash had resurged and spread throughout my back. I applied some itching cream around the rash. I looked in the mirror. I could barely recognise the girl staring at me. I had sunken eyes and lost some weight. I washed my face and rubbed the dark patches under my eyes. My hand fell to my rumbling stomach.

  I took an antiemetic with my usual two painkiller dosage before bed. That night I dreamt I was on stage accepting an award. The crowed applauded as a doctor handed me the award. There were a couple of doctors with medical masks and kids from school amongst the cheering crowed. They grew silent. When I opened my mouth to give my acceptance speech however I couldn’t speak. I had something stuck in my throat. I turned my back away from the crowed and reached down my throat to pull out whatever was lodged down my throat. When I woke up my throat was soar but nothing compared to my stomach. A sharp pain shot through my side. I groaned and wiped the cold sweat from my forehead. I set up to calm my churning stomach. It didn’t help.

  I barely made it to the toilet before I lost my dinner. My dry throat burned as I retched and regurgitated the little I had to eat. I leaned against the bathroom wall to catch my breath.

  ‘Are you okay?’

  Mum stood at the bathroom door.

  Off-course not.

  ‘I’m peachy,’ I said wryly.

  I hurled into the toilet some more. Mum knelt beside me and held my hair. She rubbed her hand around my back, but I pushed her away.

  ‘I’m fine!’ I moaned.

  Mum backed off. She watched as I hurled until there was only bile and air.

  ***

  I opened my mouth wide and said ah while Dr Graham probed me with a tongue depressor. Mum waited by the window of Dr Graham’s office.

  ‘All right,’ he said, ‘all done.’

  He walked over to Mum. ’We will need a blood test to be absolutely sure but I am certain it’s a vitamin deficiency. I’ve seen it with other patients. Co-tritopotine side effects are usually linked to inhibition of synthesis of essential vitamins. Loss of appetite and poor nutrition could also be the cause. A multi vitamin supplement should help alleviate the side effects while we wait for a thorough blood test.’

  Mum nodded.

  Throughout my treatments, the doctors and nurses would walk me through the procedures and risks. It didn’t matter whether I understood though, the consent forms were signed. The doctors were merely informing me out of obligation.

  ‘Don’t you want to fly like daddy?’ Mum would ask when I protested taking the medications and injections. ‘It’ll be a little prick. In a few months, you’ll be able to fly.’

  Sometimes it would be, ‘Be a good girl and take your medication.’

  I didn’t want to be a bad girl so naturally I behaved. I loathed the needles and taste of medicine. I hated being hospitalised, yet I conceded. I complied because I wanted to fly. I complied because I trusted and believed Mum. I agreed because I wanted to belong.

  It had been that way since I could remember. There was a time when I truly wanted to fly. A time when I believed I could be normal. Overtime, however, I had become nothing more than an experiment, a plaything for doctors to pull apart and study.

  Dr Graham collected a liquid medicine bottle and a syringe from his cabinet. He walked over to me.

&n
bsp; ‘It’s a multi-vitamin to help with the side effects,’ He explained as he prepared the shot.

  I rolled up my sleeve baring my shoulder. Dr Graham sterilised my shoulder. The needle barely pierced my skin when I yelled, ‘Stop!’

  ‘What’s wrong sweetheart?’ Mum asked.

  I got up and put on my jersey.

  ‘I want to go home,’ I trembled.

  ‘Can we talk about—’

  I stormed out of the office.

  ‘Hold on, Doctor. Let me talk to her,’ Mum told Dr Graham before following me into the hallway.

  ‘What’s wrong, honey?’ she asked.

  ‘I don’t want this anymore,’ I told her. I trembled as the words escaped me. ‘I’m tired of being poked and prodded like some kind of science experiment.’

  ‘Where’s this coming from?’ Mum sighed. ‘Maybe you should take some time to—’

  ‘I’m done!’

  A doctor and nurse walked past us.

  ‘Why don’t you take some time to think about it?’ Mum said in a soft tone.

  ‘No! I’ll never be normal!’ I grunted before storming down the hallway. I frantically pressed the down button when I reached the lift. It took forever to come. It seemed stuck on the second floor. The numbers on the indicator panel finally began to change—three, four, five. The doors slid open. I barely waited for a woman and child to get out before I rushed in and slammed the ground button.

  I wiped the tears streaming down my chicks. The lift doors opened. A nurse—Paige— greeted me with a smile as I exited. I stormed past her and trampled through the reception area to the exit. I pushed the doors open and stomped to the parking lot. Mum appeared in front of the car right before I reached it. I walked around her and pulled on the car door. It was locked. Mum reached into her handbag for the car remote and opened it. I rushed into the back passenger seat as soon as the car beeped open.

  Mum occasionally looked at me through the reflection of the rearview mirror on the drive home. I continually sniffled and wiped away an endless stream of tears with the sleeves of my jersey.