Even though Gabriella was happy for her aunt and glad that she had a fulfilling life, she still felt a sense of dread. “So are you selling the house?”
“Why? Do you want to buy it?”
Did she? She had the money. And the property was a size she could easily manage. But still... Could she make a move like that? It would be difficult to do under normal circumstances, but now that Reggie was showing an interest in her kids, did she have a right to get in between them? Would staying in Sweet Briar benefit the kids? Or would it hurt them?
“I’m not sure. I need to think about it.”
Aunt Mildred raised her eyebrows as if surprised by Gabriella’s answer. Heck, she was surprised herself. Moving here would mean a massive lifestyle change for herself and the kids. But being different didn’t make it wrong. It didn’t make it right, either. Still, it was an idea that deserved consideration.
How much of her decision-making was based on her hope for a future with Carson? Would she even consider making this move if he told her that they would never be more than friends? How would Reggie react if she moved to Sweet Briar?
“I see. Well, take your time and think about it. I don’t need to sell right away. When I sold off the land, I paid the remainder of the mortgage, which wasn’t all that much. I also paid cash for my town house, and I have plenty of money left over.” She smiled broadly. “I’m not as rich as you, but I’m not hurting either.”
“Thanks. It helps to know that I’m not costing you money.”
“I didn’t say that,” Aunt Mildred said, her eyes twinkling with humor. “I just said that I’m not desperate for money so I don’t need yours. Nor do you need to make a hasty decision.”
“Okay.”
“So now, tell me more about you and Carson. What kind of trouble have you two gotten into?”
Gabriella knew her aunt was thinking about all of the mischief she and Carson had gotten into over the years, but her mind instantly flashed back to the other night’s kiss and her cheeks warmed.
“Oh, I see.”
“Do you? I wish I did. My life is a mess, and I have a feeling his isn’t much better. Yet there is something about him that makes my heart happy, which, given his secret, has me worried. I’m not even sure if he’s thinking of me that way. For all I know he’s still stuck on Raven.”
“I don’t think so. In my opinion they were just two lonely people reaching out who happened to find each other.”
“They were engaged.”
“I know. But Donovan was always the only one for Raven.”
That addressed Raven’s feelings, but not Carson’s. “But Carson still wanted to marry her.”
“Perhaps he thought it was time to settle down and she was available. And you’d already gotten married. Was he supposed to live the rest of his life waiting for you to come back?”
“It wasn’t like that between us. We were always good friends. Only good friends.”
“Friends who spent every waking minute together. Who knows what would have happened between the two of you if you hadn’t been pressured to marry Reggie.”
“I wasn’t pressured.”
Aunt Mildred snorted. “You were too young to have been involved with that man. Your parents should have slowed things down. Instead, they had dollar signs in their eyes. I’m not saying I don’t understand where they were coming from. They wanted you to have a more secure future than they’d had. But still, the cost was too high.”
Hearing Aunt Mildred voice thoughts Gabriella had recently begun to entertain made her emotional, and she could only nod as a lump materialized in her throat. Her aunt must have sensed that Gabriella had reached her emotional limit, because she turned the conversation to lighter topics.
When they finished their tea, they drove back to the youth center to pick up the kids. This time Aunt Mildred accompanied Gabriella inside. She signed out the kids and waited for a volunteer to bring them to the entry.
A group of preschoolers passed by. One of them spotted Aunt Mildred and let out a happy squeal. “It’s the book lady.”
As one, the kids charged Aunt Mildred, wrapping her in their arms. “Are you here to read to us? Do you have your puppets?”
“Not today. But I’ll be back soon.”
Gabriella smiled as she watched her aunt give each child a hug and then help them get back in line. Once they’d been corralled, the teen leader led them back down the hall. One little one waved to Aunt Mildred before disappearing into a room.
“I see you’re just as popular as ever.”
“With some. With others?” She shrugged. “Who cares?”
That was a strange answer. Before Gabriella could ask her aunt what she meant, she heard her name being called. Turning, she saw Justin barreling toward her, Sophia behind him. Whereas Justin was running, Sophia was walking slowly, carrying a clay sculpture in her hands.
“Is it time to go home already?” Justin asked.
“Yep. Did you have a good time?”
“I always have fun here.”
Sophia reached them and held out her artwork. “Look what I made in art class.”
“It’s beautiful.” And that was the truth. The horse sculpture looked exactly like Angel. Sophia had captured the likeness perfectly, from the shades of brown to the white socks. The horse seemed to be in motion.
“Mrs. Knight said that I have an artist’s eye. I didn’t know what that meant, so she told me that I am talented.”
“You certainly are.”
The children greeted their aunt, and then they all climbed into the SUV. When they pulled up in front of Aunt Mildred’s town house twenty minutes later, the children got out and gave her big hugs.
“I’ll come and see you very soon,” Aunt Mildred promised. Then she blew a kiss to Gabriella. “And you. Be brave. The answers are inside you. All you have to do is listen.”
Gabriella laughed. “I wish it was that simple.”
“It is. Just trust yourself.”
Aunt Mildred’s words repeated in Gabriella’s mind all the way home. Was it possible that the answers to her questions were inside her? Maybe. But unless they revealed themselves, they weren’t doing her a bit of good.
Chapter Ten
Finally. He was home. Carson had spent three of the past four days on the road, taking two previously abused horses to their new homes. He could have had the owners pick them up, but he’d wanted to help them get the horses acclimated to their surroundings. And truth be told, he needed some time away from Gabriella to clear his head. It was impossible to think clearly when she was around. He needed to come up with answers to some pressing questions, and soon. He’d planned to use his time on the road to think, but he’d been too preoccupied with the way she’d felt in his arms to think of anything else. Now he was back on the ranch, and the questions still remained unanswered.
Did he want a more intimate relationship with her or was he satisfied with just being friends? If things worked out between them, would she be willing to relocate here? Was he willing to move to Ohio if she wasn’t?
Rivers Ranch had been in his family for four generations. He was connected to every acre and couldn’t imagine living anywhere else. Despite all that had happened here, his life was here. Gabriella and her children were enjoying their time in North Carolina. But he knew that everything was fun on vacation. Could they be happy living here all year round? Though he loved ranch living and the small town of Sweet Briar, he knew that the town didn’t have the amenities that were available in a larger city. There weren’t any big-box stores or fast-food restaurants. To him, that was part of the charm, but when you’d grown up with conveniences, their absence could be a problem. It was a matter of perspective.
But Carson had spent so much time in his own head mulling over these questions and a dozen others that he’d only confused himself. He needed someon
e to talk to. Someone who wasn’t so close to the situation and who could give him some guidance.
Once he’d had close friends he could have contacted, but over the past year he’d drifted away from them. At the time he’d thought they’d been trying too hard to convince him that nothing had changed. That he still fit in. He hadn’t believed them. The foundation of his life had been rocked and everything he’d once believed had turned out to be lies. Consequently, he’d thought of himself differently. He’d believed they must have, too.
But maybe they’d been telling him the truth. They’d continued to call him and attempted to include him in their activities. He’d been the one to shut the door on their friendship. Maybe to them he was the same Carson Rivers. Just today he’d received a text reminding him of the Thursday night basketball game. For the past few years, a group of men and teenagers met up at the youth center for a few games. Before things had fallen apart Carson hadn’t played every week, but he’d attended more times than he’d missed. And he had enjoyed the camaraderie.
He checked his watch. There was enough time to wash off the dirt from the road, grab a sandwich and still get to the center in time to play.
He parked his truck in the barn, and then unhooked the horse trailer and cleaned it. He took a shower and made a ham sandwich, which he ate standing up at the kitchen counter. After brushing the crumbs from his shirt, he grabbed his keys and headed for town.
He recognized a couple of the cars in the lot as belonging to his teammates, and his excitement built. Until this very moment, he hadn’t realized how much he’d missed hanging out with the other guys.
He parked and then went inside the building. He was walking down the hall to the gym when someone called his name. Turning, he smiled at Joni.
“Hey, Carson. Long time no see.”
“Hi, Joni.” She was holding the hand of her young son, Joshua, who was toddling beside her. Carson waited for them to catch up.
When she reached his side, she smiled. “I take it that you’re here for another dose of humiliation at the hands of the teenagers.”
He laughed. “So the team hasn’t gotten better in my absence.”
“Did you think it would? Surely you don’t think you were the cause of their abysmal record.”
“Not solely.” Carson was actually one of the better players. The adult team was composed of players whose best days—if those days ever truly existed—were behind them.
“Father Time is to blame for that.”
“Are you giving us an out? That wouldn’t be because you’re married to a player on our team, would it?”
She laughed but didn’t deny it.
They reached the gym and stepped inside. The familiar sounds of basketballs pounding the floor reached him, and he began to feel at home. Why had he stayed away from his friends for so long?
“Heads up.”
Carson grabbed the ball that had been bounced in his direction. Man, he hoped that wasn’t supposed to be a pass. John Howard was a great mechanic, but he couldn’t play basketball to save his life.
“Good catch,” John said, before jogging back to the bench and picking up another ball. He aimed at the basket and missed by a mile. Yep. Looked like his team was going to be beaten again tonight.
“Hey.” Lex Devlin jogged over and picked up his son, lifting him over his head. Joshua let out a long laugh, squealing as Lex released him and then caught him a second later.
“Again, Daddy. Do it again.”
“Sure thing, bud.”
Carson watched as father and son played for a minute, his heart suddenly filled with unexpected longing. Since when did he want to have a child? Over the past year he’d convinced himself that he didn’t want to be a father. After discovering what his own father had done, he didn’t want to risk bringing a child into the world. Who knew what evil lurked in his genes?
Before long he’d convinced himself that he didn’t deserve a family. What woman would willingly take on the baggage that he carried? It would be unfair to ask. Now he wondered if he’d been mistaken. Maybe talking with Lex would help him clarify things. Carson had never been one for spilling his guts—the exception being with Gabriella when they’d been kids—but desperate times called for desperate measures.
Lex kissed his son’s cheek before handing the little boy back to Joni. He gave her a hug, and then turned to Carson and slapped him on the shoulder. “It’s good to see you, man. I was beginning to think you’d put us down.”
“It’s good to see you, too.”
“Everything all right?”
Carson shrugged. As a child, he’d often longed for a big brother. Although Lex had lived an entirely different life than Carson had—Lex’s family owned one of the most successful cosmetic companies in the country and he’d been raised in a tony New York suburb before becoming mayor of Sweet Briar—Carson had come to think of Lex as an older brother. Lex shared his wisdom as well as a dose of razzing that had always made their relationship comfortable. At least until Carson had decided he was unworthy of friends.
“We’re taking the teens out for pizza after the game,” Lex said. “We’ll talk then.”
“Okay.”
“Are you guys ready?” one of the teens called, dribbling the ball between his legs.
“Yeah, Benji. I’m surprised you’re so anxious to get beat,” Rick Tyler replied. Rick was the town doctor and the best player on the team. He also talked the most trash.
The teenager laughed as if that was the funniest thing he’d heard.
“How long has it been since we won the night?” Carson asked as he and Lex joined their teammates. Tonight there were ten players on each team. Three college girls were officiating. At first, the players had called their own fouls, but that hadn’t lasted long. The adults had thought everything was a foul and the teenagers had thought that if it didn’t draw blood it was allowed. It was good having referees to settle that debate.
The games had started as an informal way of building relationships between the adults and youth in town, but had soon become an attraction. Tonight there was a group of teenage girls in the bleachers, as well as several wives with their children. Carson wished he’d invited Gabriella and her kids to come and watch, but that would have made a statement he wasn’t sure he was ready to make.
“Longer than I can recall. We’re lucky if we win one game.”
The teams played three twenty-minute games each night: two ten-minute halves separated by a five-minute halftime. Best two out of three won the night and bragging rights for the week.
“Well, tonight we’re going to win,” Carson said.
“Yeah,” Rick said, coming beside Carson. “You old guys just let us young guys have the ball.”
“You do realize that you’re trash-talking your own teammates,” Trent Knight, the chief of police, said.
“No offense to the over-forty crowd, Chief,” Rick said, grinning. “All I’m saying is let us twenty-and thirtysomethings take the lead. We have more stamina.”
“Oh, I have stamina,” Trent said with a wicked grin.
They all laughed. Carson had missed this.
“Are you guys ready yet?” a teen called again. “All that stretching isn’t going to make you any faster or help you make baskets.”
The other kids hooted.
Carson joined four of his teammates on the floor. The two teams nodded as Melanie, the referee, told them to play fair and have a good game. The youth were bigger and stronger than Carson remembered. Melanie threw the ball up and Lex and Benji battled for it. But only for a second. Benji tipped it to a teammate, who took off down the floor. Two quick passes later and the teens had scored.
Oh, boy. They were faster than Carson remembered, too.
The adults took possession of the ball and ran down court. Unless things had changed in Carson’s absence, they didn�
�t have set plays. They just passed the ball until someone got open and took a shot. Or until one of the teens stole the ball.
After five times up and down the floor, the adults had yet to score and the teens hadn’t missed. Two older guys were huffing and puffing, looking like they would keel over any second. Rick might not have been diplomatic, but he wasn’t wrong when he said that the over-forty crowd should take a back seat. With the exception of Lex and Trent, the older guys had definitely lost a step, and that was being generous. There were a couple of fathers on the team who were taking the opportunity to spend time with their sons. Carson appreciated the desire for father-son bonding, but they were dooming the adult team to certain defeat. Carson looked at Rick, who nodded. It was time for the under-forties to take over.
Carson stole the ball and passed it to Rick. Rick dribbled down the court and made a basket. Finally. At least they weren’t going to get shut out. The teens took offense to being shown up and upped their level of play. At halftime, the teens were leading thirty-eight to six.
“It’s a good thing you younger guys are here,” John said as he mopped sweat from his brow. “Otherwise we might be losing. Oh, that’s right. We are.”
Carson laughed. “Tell that to Rick, not me.”
“I’m not the one getting posterized,” Rick said to John.
“Benji is good,” Lex said. “He’s got offers from colleges all over the country. And a couple of NBA teams have been sniffing around.”
“What’s he going to do?” Carson asked.
“Your guess is as good as mine. His mom’s a widow with kids to support. From what I hear, she’s been trying to convince him to go to school. But he might go for the money so he can help her out.”
Carson couldn’t imagine the pressure the kid was under. He’d grown up financially stable and as a teenager hadn’t given money a second thought. Karl Rivers might have been many things, but he’d provided well for his family. Carson frowned. He hated even thinking something positive about his father. Karl had killed someone, depriving other children of their father. A woman of her husband. Carson didn’t want to give his father a free pass, but at the same time he couldn’t alter the past, even if his outlook had changed. It was so much easier to not think of his father than to try to sort out his complicated feelings.
Redemption on Rivers Ranch Page 14