Quiver of Cobras

by Helen Harper

  I already had a pretty good idea what was inside the chest and I was highly tempted to leave it where it was without checking – magical memory malarkey be damned. But I was the Madhatter. Nothing scared or intimidated me. Shadows ran from me; monsters quaked at the very mention of my name. I was no namby-pamby minion. No, I was graceful strength personified.

  A strange scuttling sound reached my ears. I frowned, squinting to see where it was coming from. A moment later, a tiny spider made its way up over the side of the chest and I screamed. Very loudly. I jerked backwards, recoiling with such violence that the mud around me spattered upwards, flicking a spray of smelly gloop across my face and torso.

  I wiped off the worst of it and eyed the chest suspiciously. The spider had vanished. That made me more nervous than if it were still looking at me with its creepy multiple eyes. I swung my head round, scanning the forest gloom as if I expected the eight-legged beast, which had to be at least the size of my thumbnail, to attack me with an army of its hairy buddies. I couldn’t see anything; I couldn’t hear anything either.

  Scowling to myself, I reached for the chest again, waving my hands at it first just in case any more spiders were lurking around it. Then I flipped open the lid. The damned arachnid had put me on edge so I wasn’t even pleased that my educated guess about the contents had been confirmed. I already knew I was highly intelligent; what I didn’t know was where the arsebadgering spider had gone.

  Still wary – as well I should have been – I dipped the tip of my index finger into the pile of sparkly dust and lifted it up to my face to examine it more closely. As far as I understood, Carduus made this crap in his lab. I wondered whether the sparkles were a side effect of whatever potions and magic spells he used or whether he put them in because he liked a bit of bling.

  I stuck out my tongue, allowing myself the tiniest lick. A second later, I spat. Aniseed again. Of all the flavours in the world, why would you choose aniseed? I supposed the taste didn’t really matter, given that pixie dust was designed to be snorted, but really! I shook my head, bemused, and closed the lid of the chest. Then I yanked myself awkwardly to my feet, stuffed the chest under my arm and continued walking.

  Chapter Eleven

  It took longer than I’d hoped to get back into the city although it was still barely gone midnight by the time I limped out of the taxi. One of Rubus’s Fey henchmen was standing outside the hideout. His eyes flicked in my direction and I blew him a kiss, but he didn’t react. Shrugging, I turned and walked in the opposite direction, heading for the nearest open pub.

  The first one I came across displayed a curling, yellowed poster for a local band aptly named ‘Mud In Your Eye’. I shrugged and entered.

  It was one of those old men’s pubs. No showy craft beers or artisan crisps on offer here; this was all strong ale and pork scratchings, with an invasive odour of stale Old Spice and sour body odour. I ignored the stares from the few remaining punters and took a seat on one of the bar stools.

  The barman shambled over. He didn’t say a cheery hello; in fact, he didn’t say anything – he just looked me up and down. Perhaps I should have kept my Madhatter superhero cape and added it to my leather corset and splattered mud ensemble.

  I hefted the chest of pixie dust onto the bar top. ‘Vodka,’ I said. ‘Lots of vodka. No ice.’ I look at the barman sternly. ‘And make sure it’s the strongest you’ve got.’

  Mr Silent-But-Judgy nodded and turned to the shelf behind him. He poured me a double and set it down in front of me. I raised the glass and lifted it to my lips, taking only the smallest sip before choking and spluttering.

  ‘Maybe some Coke too?’ I croaked. ‘Just to make it a bit sweeter.’

  He smirked, finally cracking his bland exterior. ‘Sure thing, duck.’

  Once I could continue drinking without fearing for my life, I started to relax. The vodka, even tempered with copious amounts of sweet, fizzy cola, sent a warm buzz down through my body.

  The other patrons settled back into their conversations and, thanks to my appearance, I had no worries that I would be interrupted with nonsensical flirting. Mud-caked as I was, I was still obviously far too sophisticated for the likes of anyone here. All the men must have recognised that to approach me would be to punch too far above their weight.

  I tossed back my hair, inadvertently sending a few bits of dried mud behind me, one or two of which landed in a bearded fellow’s pint. Oops. I hastily turned away and hunched my shoulders. Maybe if I pretended I were invisible, he wouldn’t notice me.

  ‘Enjoying yourself?’ murmured a familiar voice by my side.

  I jerked, spilling some of my drink. ‘Rubus,’ I said. ‘What a joy.’

  He smiled at me, although his smile didn’t reach his eyes. ‘You could at least pretend that you’re happy to see me.’

  I gave up on my invisibility attempt and flung myself off my bar stool. I wrapped my arms round Morgan’s brother and squeezed him as tightly as I could without breaking the terms of the truce, then I rubbed my cheek against his like a cat. ‘I’m so glad to see you,’ I said breathlessly. ‘All I could think about was you and how much I missed you. And now you’re here!’ I pulled back and clasped my heart. ‘It’s a miracle! A god-given miracle!’

  ‘Hey lady,’ growled the bearded man. ‘You owe me another drink.’

  ‘I’ll get it,’ Rubus said. He raised his eyebrows at me. ‘If you’ll stop acting like an idiot.’

  I shrugged. I could cope with that. ‘Okay,’ I trilled. I hopped back onto my stool. I was pleased to note that a considerable amount of the mud that had been plastered over me was now covering Rubus.

  He paid for the drinks, even going so far as to take the pint over to the whinger who, I noticed, might not have wanted mud splattered into his pint of beer but had still drunk it down to the dregs. Whatever. It was Rubus’s money that was being wasted.

  Rubus took several gulps of his own pint. I noticed with interest that his hands were shaking. Was he scared of me? The idea made my insides burble with happiness. Then I saw that his skin looked paler than normal and there were lines of tension around his eyes.

  ‘Are you ill?’ I enquired.

  ‘What?’ he snapped.

  I pointed at his face. ‘You don’t look very well. You should get some vitamins down you or something. You’ve got a big date tomorrow night.’

  Rubus’s forehead creased as if he’d completely forgotten about his dinner with a star from St Thomas Close. He’d demanded I arrange it; the least he could do was remember it.

  ‘I’m fine,’ he answered shortly. ‘No thanks to my bastard of a brother though.’

  ‘He caused problems for you out at Chen’s place?’ I enquired, carefully schooling my expression to avoid yielding any truths.

  ‘He wasn’t even there.’ Rubus grimaced in disgust. ‘He couldn’t be bothered to show up in person. He just sent a bunch of Fey flunkies.’

  I tapped the side of my glass. ‘Are you surprised?’ I asked. ‘After all, that’s what you usually do.’

  Anger sparked in Rubus’s green eyes. They really were remarkably similar to Morgan’s. ‘Are you suggesting that I’m not man enough to get my hands dirty?’

  ‘Actually,’ I said, hoping this tactic would work, ‘I’m saying it of both you and your brother. Aren’t the pair of you supposed to be leaders or something? How do you expect people to follow you if you won’t lead by example?’

  ‘I was leading by example,’ Rubus snapped. ‘I was there – at least for a short while. Morgan didn’t show his ugly face once.’

  I took another sip of my drink. ‘You know,’ I said, ‘the two of you look incredibly alike.’

  Rubus glowered at me but I just smiled in return. ‘I know what your game is, Madrona,’ he said finally.

  Uh-oh. ‘Yes?’ I blinked in an attempt at wide-eyed innocence.

  ‘You’re trying us both out for size. You don’t remember either of us so you’ve spent a bit of time with Morgan and
now you’re spending a bit of time with me. When you’ve decided which one of us you like best, you’ll make your choice. You won’t give a shit about the other one.’ He drained his glass and extended his finger to the barman to order another. ‘The trouble is that if I play that game for too long, you’ll end up losing us both. You’re not so desirable that we’ll forgive your every fault.’

  ‘You forced me to come with you,’ I pointed out.

  ‘Yes,’ he conceded. ‘But you’ve had plenty of opportunities over the last day or two to leave, should you so wish. In fact, you’ve been doing the opposite. You’ve been putting on quite a show for me.’

  Fair point; Rubus was more canny than I’d give him credit for. I considered his words seriously. ‘I’ll say one thing,’ I told him. ‘You’re certainly more intelligent than Morgan.’

  Rubus laughed softly. ‘Only because he could never understand what you saw in me. Everything is black and white to him. It would give me more joy than he would ever know if he and I could work together to get back home to Mag Mell but he’s not interested. He won’t make things happen, he’ll wait for someone else to make them happen. I’m proactive, he’s reactive.’ He exhaled. ‘He’s a fool.’ For the briefest second, sadness flickered across his expression.

  Something twisted in my stomach. Was I actually feeling sorry for Rubus? I mentally slapped myself. Arsebadger. ‘Did you and I ever fuck?’ I asked.

  His eyes flew to mine and he half-choked. ‘You certainly have a way with words, Madrona.’

  I bowed. ‘Thank you very much. It’s a serious question though.’

  While I wasn’t sure what the truth was, I knew what I expected Rubus to say. He surprised me, however. ‘No,’ he said. ‘We did not. Although I’m sure that Morgan believes otherwise. I certainly gave him enough cause to.’

  Huh. I nibbled my bottom lip, waiting until the barman had presented Rubus with his second pint and moved away again. He didn’t go far; I could tell he was still interested enough to try and eavesdrop on us. Rubus did too. He glared at the barman who finally found something to do on the other side of the room.

  I twiddled my fingers together. ‘Did I ask Morgan to marry me?’

  Rubus snapped his eyes back. ‘Did he tell you that?’

  I shook my head. ‘No. It was a different Fey.’

  His mouth thinned. ‘It’s true. You even went down one knee.’ He shrugged. ‘Or so I heard.’

  ‘So why did I do it? Why did I leave him for you?’ I was careful to keep my tone curious rather than censorious.

  ‘The first time was for the same reason as the second time,’ Rubus answered. He offered a half smile. ‘Because I forced you.’

  I drew in a sharp breath and he laughed. ‘Look at you,’ he said. ‘Your little mind is whirring now, isn’t it? What did I do? How terrible was it? How monstrous was I that you dumped your fiancé for me?’ He gestured to my glass. ‘You should drink some more. You’re probably going to need it.’

  I did as he suggested. Suddenly, getting drunk seemed like a remarkably good idea.

  ‘Tell me, Madrona,’ Rubus said, ‘do you think honesty is a good thing? Do you believe in the righteousness of truth?’

  ‘I guess so.’ I watched him warily. I couldn’t help remembering the banter about honesty that Morgan and I had engaged in. ‘Though I can see when a white lie can be appropriate.’

  ‘Indeed.’ Rubus nodded. ‘Because all I did to get you to leave Morgan was to promise the truth if you didn’t.’

  ‘Go on.’ I’d already learned that I was a murderer tonight. How much worse could it get?

  Rubus licked his lips in sudden gleeful anticipation. I felt like I was watching a car crash and I should look away. Gasbudlikins, I should run away. I couldn’t though; I was rooted to the spot. I had to hear what he was going to say.

  ‘There are only two people in this world,’ he whispered, ‘who know why the borders to other demesnes closed. Actually,’ he amended, ‘now that you have amnesia, there’s only one person.’

  Whatever I’d been expecting, it wasn’t that. I blinked, too confused and surprised to work out where he was going with this. From the expression on Rubus’s face, he knew it too.

  ‘We are all stuck here because of you, Madrona,’ Rubus said. ‘You caused the borders to close. All this,’ he swept an arm back towards the hideout, ‘is your fault. You trapped us here.’

  ‘Bullshit. There’s no way that’s true.’

  Rubus was no longer smiling. ‘I’m not lying.’ He reached into his pocket. ‘In fact, I’ll prove it to you.’

  He pulled out a box. I knew exactly what was inside it and half fell off my bar stool in a bid to get away. ‘You brought one of those things here?’ I spat at him.

  ‘Relax. It’s for me, not for you.’ He rolled up his sleeve then opened the box lid with his other hand and let the spider crawl out. I stared in sickened fascination as it edged up his bare arm. Rubus gazed at it fondly.

  I shuddered. The Truth Spider raised one of its legs and started to tap it against Rubus’s skin, as if it were pondering the meaning of life. Rubus let out a mild snort.

  ‘You weren’t always afraid of spiders, Madrona,’ he said. He extended one finger and gently stroked the creature’s bulbous back. ‘I did that.’ He sounded proud of his achievement.

  The spider didn’t react so obviously Rubus was telling the truth. Hardly surprising. ‘How many times?’ I asked. ‘How many times did you put those things on me?’

  ‘I lost count,’ he murmured, not taking his eyes off the spider. ‘Occasionally you resisted and attempted a lie but it never went well.’

  A deep-seated shiver ran through my bones. He’d told me before that the Truth Spiders only bit if you lied while one was on you – and that the ensuing pain was horrendous. Given its gleaming fangs, I could well believe it. Rubus had also mentioned that it only took three or four bites to kill a Fey. It was one way of getting round the truce.

  I shuffled further back in case the hairy bastard decided to leap at me. And I wasn’t just talking about the spider. I glanced around. None of the other pub customers were paying us the slightest bit of attention.

  ‘Let’s get to the point, shall we?’ he murmured. ‘The border to Mag Mell closed because of you, Madrona. It was your fault and you knew exactly what you were doing.’

  It was probably the only thing he could have said that would have dragged my attention away from the spider. My eyes flew up to his and I realised he was watching me – and enjoying this. ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘You were somewhat … reckless when you were younger. And talented.’ His smile chilled me even more than the spider had. ‘You developed a spell to close the border and trap everyone here. You wanted the other Fey to stop taking this demesne for granted and you decided that forcing a large group of us to spend more time here would encourage that. Of course, you thought it would only be temporary. I believe the closure was only supposed to last for forty-eight hours. But when the deadline passed and your binding magic held,’ he raised his shoulders, ‘well, let’s just say that you realised your mistake.’

  I shot a look at the spider. I couldn’t help myself. It had stopped tapping its leg and wasn’t moving. I swallowed; Rubus wasn’t lying then. ‘How…’ I licked my lips nervously. ‘How did you find out that I did it?’

  ‘You told me. You wanted to show off to someone and you knew that if you told Morganus he would not be amused. So you told me. You used me to boost your ego. It was a while later when I used that fact against you. How else do you think I got you to turn to me instead of my brother?’

  ‘You gave me an ultimatum,’ I whispered, finally realising. ‘Either I went to you or you’d tell Morgan what I’d done – that all this was my fault.’

  Rubus bared his teeth. ‘Indeed. You were rather sullen at first but you came around. In fact, our relationship went from strength to strength when you realised how much better things were at my side. You weren’t made to
be angelic and pure, Madrona. You’re far more interesting than that.’

  What I should have done was take full advantage of the situation and the spider on his arm. I should have questioned him, trapped him in a lie or tried to find his true intentions for Chen’s sphere. But the weight of Rubus’s revelations had rocked me too much for coherent thought.

  He smiled at me then gently encouraged the spider back into its box. ‘You think I’m a bad guy,’ he said softly.

  I opened my mouth, wanting to protest, but he held up his hand and waved me into silence. ‘There’s no point lying about it, Madrona. I can see it every time you look at me. I horrify you even more than my spiders do. But you have to admit that I fascinate you too. That’s because you possess the same streak that I do.’

  I found my voice. ‘Streak of evil?’

  He laughed. ‘No. There’s no single word for the likes of us. Mere vocabulary can’t possibly encapsulate our genius. It’s a streak of cunning, of intelligence. Of pure, throbbing power and risk-taking. It’s weighing up the odds and making a choice because it’s the best choice available, even if some people might get hurt in the process. You and I are far more alike than you give us credit for.’

  The most troubling thing about all this was that I suspected Rubus was correct and I had more in common with him than I did with Morgan. But that didn’t mean I wanted it. Or him.

  Rubus tucked away the box. Praise be. ‘So,’ he drawled, ‘has this helped make your mind up as to which brother you would prefer to be with?’

  Gods, yes. I jiggled my bar stool closer to him, although I made sure I was still far enough away should he release that damned spider again. I pointed at the little chest that was still resting on top of the bar. ‘That should answer your question.’

  Rubus reached for it, drawing it into his lap. ‘There’s not a poisonous snake inside here, is there?’