Wild Spirit

by Mari Carr

  “Thinking about what?” he prompted, clearly intent on heading out without even taking a minute or two to visit like he usually did.

  “When was the last time you hung out at the pub with a bunch of us? I know Lochlan, Colm and Padraig would love to see you and catch up. I swear it’s been at least a year since we’ve had the whole gang together.”

  “That April Fools party,” Leo responded.

  His answer took her aback. Had it really been that long? “Seriously? That was nearly a year and a half ago.”

  “I don’t have a lot of free time right now, Yvonne. I was lucky I managed to make it that night.”

  “Make some time,” she suggested. “If you don’t mind me saying, you look worn out. A night with the Collins clan can cure a lot of ills. Why don’t you stop by tonight after—”

  “Tonight won’t work.”

  “Why not?”

  Leo sighed. “Listen, Yvonne. I need to finish up these rounds and get back to the farm. We’re shorthanded and there’re a bunch of crops that need to be harvested.”

  “You’re always shorthanded,” she grumbled.

  “Maybe some other time, okay?”

  Before she could reply or even say goodbye, Leo was already out the back door.

  “Damn,” Riley said, sliding next to her. “That boy is headed for a breakdown.”

  “He’s thirty-one, Riley. Hardly a boy.”

  Riley shot her a look. “That’s not the point. Leo looks stretched about as thin as a body can get. I’m starting to worry about him.”

  Yvonne nodded, turning when the timer went off to pull the large pan of shepherd’s pie out of the oven. She’d been helping her aunt cook in the restaurant since middle school. She loved to cook, loved spending time here in the midst of all the delicious smells, reworking old recipes that had been passed down from Grandma Sunday to Riley, and now to her.

  This restaurant was her happy place, her Mecca, her dream job. Sunday’s Side was connected through a large open doorway to Pat’s Pub, the business her Pop Pop had been running ever since he’d arrived in America from Ireland.

  Her dad, Ewan, managed the restaurant with her aunt Keira, and Yvonne’s plan for the future included cooking in the kitchen and eventually taking over the running of Sunday’s Side, after Dad and Keira retired. Her cousin, Padraig, planned to assume the helm on the pub side and was already sharing the tasks associated with running it with his father, Tris.

  Yvonne had known pretty early on exactly what she wanted to do with her life, so from a career standpoint, she’d always had her shit together. It was everything else she couldn’t seem to get a handle on.

  “I’m worried too,” Yvonne confessed. “But what can we do? You know Leo. He’s a private guy and he’s not the type to complain. If he doesn’t want to tell me what’s going on, I’m not sure how to help.”

  Riley shook her head. “If the mountain won’t come to Muhammad, Muhammad must go to the mountain.”

  “Meaning?”

  Riley rolled her eyes. “Seriously? I need to explain this to you? After all the years you’ve spent in this kitchen with me while you were growing up? Something I figure your poor mom regrets allowing.”

  Yvonne laughed. Her mom adored Aunt Riley, she honestly and truly did. But the women were as dissimilar as salt and sugar. Riley was loud, flamboyant, opinionated and had a tendency to pepper her sentences liberally with the “F” word. The first time Yvonne let that whopper slip, her mom had pointed at her dad and said, “I blame Riley for this.”

  Dad had promised to ask Riley to clean up the language around Yvonne and she could attest to her aunt’s efforts to do so. Riley’s cursing turning to flavorful “near misses” as she turned fuck to fudge, shit to sugar and bitch to biscuit. However, she abandoned that game when Yvonne turned fifteen because “it was too fucking exhausting.” After that, she’d let the language fly, then followed every curse word with “Don’t say that in front of Natalie or she’ll kick my ass.”

  And Yvonne had managed to follow that rule…mostly. At least until after high school.

  “Meaning,” Riley said, shaking her head in disbelief over having to explain herself, “you know better than to listen when people feed you a line of bullshit. Listen with your eyes, not your ears. He says he’s fine, which is a bold-faced lie. You saw him. I’m pretty sure he was wearing that same shirt the last time he was here—and it hasn’t been washed. The damn thing is filthy. His hair is shaggy, which is unusual for him. He’s long overdue for a haircut…and a shave. He never comes in here looking all scruffy-faced like that. There are darker circles under the dark circles under his eyes, and if he’s slept more than five hours a night this past week, I’ll eat my bra.”

  “You’re wearing one today?” Yvonne joked.

  “Smartass,” Riley said, chuckling. “That boy needs an intervention.”

  Yvonne considered that as Riley walked over to begin mixing the dough for the homemade bread they planned to serve with the special tonight.

  Yvonne began to unpack the box of produce, putting the vegetables away as she recalled the first time she’d seen Leo look so done in.

  It had been the night of graduation. Lochlan’s parents had planned a blowout celebration for him and several of his closest friends, and Yvonne had been headed to her car, planning to drive to the party, when she’d noticed Leo sitting alone in the school parking lot…

  * * *

  Yvonne glanced around the quickly emptying parking lot. Most of the graduates and their families had already shared the hugs, taken the requisite seventy-two million cap and gown pictures, and headed out.

  She tucked her keys back in her skirt pocket and walked over to him. “Leo?”

  Though the window was rolled down, Leo didn’t look up at the sound of her voice. He didn’t even seem to see her approaching his truck.

  She thought he looked far too depressed for someone who had just graduated from high school. If it was her who’d just busted out of this joint, she’d be dancing naked in the streets right about now. She walked right up to the driver’s side window of his pickup and said his name again.

  He raised his eyes, meeting hers slowly. There was utter devastation on his face.

  Something that wasn’t a complete surprise. He’d been subdued and…well, sad, for the past few weeks. She and Lochlan had both asked him if he was okay, had tried to cajole him out of his misery, but nothing had worked. Leo would simply tell them he was fine or offer some lame excuse for his melancholy—blaming it on nerves over graduation or stress over end-of-the-year exams.

  Neither she nor her cousin truly believed his reasons, but Leo wasn’t ready to tell them what was really wrong, so they’d given him space and time.

  “What happened?” Yvonne asked.

  He blinked a couple of times, and she wondered if he’d heard her. He was looking at her with a faraway expression.

  “Leo?”

  This time, her voice penetrated. He leaned back against the driver’s seat, his shoulders slumped. “Oh. Hey, Yvonne.”

  “Everyone else is heading over to Uncle Will and Aunt Keira’s house for the party. Are you coming?”

  He shrugged, then shook his head. “I don’t feel much like celebrating.”

  Yvonne hated seeing him like this, and she was tired of tiptoeing around him. Avoiding problems wasn’t her style, so she crossed in front of the truck, opened the passenger door and slid in.

  “Yvonne,” he started, clearly intent on feeding her the same line of bullshit he had the past few weeks in an attempt to get rid of her.

  “I’m not getting out of this truck until you tell me what’s wrong,” she insisted.

  He scowled. “Nothing’s wrong.”

  “Liar.”

  Leo crossed his arms, stubbornness setting in. She smirked. She could out-stubborn a mule. If he wanted to go a round or two, she was game.

  She crossed her own arms, mimicking his annoyance and his posture.

 
When she held his gaze, he gave in a little. “I’ve just got some stuff on my mind. Things I need to work out on my own.”

  “Like what?”

  “What part of on my own confused you?”

  Yvonne narrowed her eyes. “Acting like an asshole won’t budge me because I know you’re not a jerk. So I’ll repeat the part that clearly confused you. I’m not getting out of this truck until you tell me what’s wrong with you.”

  “You’ll miss the party.” It was a lame last-ditch attempt. He was running out of ammo.

  “I don’t care. It’s not like I graduated. I still have to endure another year of high school hell.” She didn’t really mean that. Truth was, she enjoyed most parts of high school, though she didn’t think she’d like it as much next year without Leo and Lochlan there. She was going to have to find a new group to eat lunch with, and that sucked.

  “Seriously, Yvonne. I made a mess of something, and I have to figure out how to fix it on my own. This isn’t something you can—”

  As he spoke, something in the center console caught her eye. “What’s that?” she interrupted, pointing to a small ring box.

  Leo quickly picked up the box and put it in his pocket. He clearly hadn’t meant for her to see it. “Nothing.”

  “Is that an engagement ring?”

  There was no way Leo would propose to Denise. For one thing, they were way too young. And for another, Yvonne had gotten the impression the couple was on the verge of breaking up. Something she and Lochlan had mused was probably what was bothering Leo.

  He and Denise had dated ever since the Homecoming dance their sophomore year. They’d been called the “perfect” couple by everyone at school—except her, though she’d given up her crush on him at the beginning of this year when it was obvious Leo still only had eyes for Denise. Yvonne had gone out with a few guys since then and was currently dating Ricky Bernard.

  “Deo”—the ridiculous couple name Lochlan had given Denise and Leo—were even crowned king and queen at this year’s junior/senior prom.

  “Are you insane?” Yvonne asked, when it became apparent that was indeed what was in the box. “You can’t propose to Denise.”

  “I already did.” Leo turned away from her, looking toward the school.

  “What? Why would you do that? Tell her it was a mistake. You’re only eighteen, Leo. What would possess you to—”

  “She’s pregnant.”

  Yvonne fell silent, her stomach clenching in panic. No wonder he’d been so quiet lately, so worried. “What are you going to do?”

  “I’d planned to take responsibility for my actions. I was going to make things right.”

  “That’s not still the plan?”

  “She turned me down. Said she wouldn’t marry me.”

  Yvonne frowned. “Why would she do that?”

  “She said two wrongs don’t make a right. That she wasn’t going to make this whole situation worse by marrying me.”

  “But…” Yvonne was flabbergasted. “You two have been a couple for nearly three years. Why would she have stayed with you that long if she didn’t love you?” Yvonne had never thought Denise’s feelings toward Leo were as strong as his were for her, but she wouldn’t tell him that. She didn’t kick a dog when it was down, and this dog was way down.

  “I have no idea. She told me she was pregnant a few weeks ago.”

  “You didn’t use protection?”

  Leo was one of the brightest boys in the school, and he didn’t seem like the type who’d lose his head in the heat of the moment.

  He grimaced. “Of course we did. I always wore a condom, and she was on the Pill. But she got bronchitis a month or so ago and went on antibiotics. That makes the Pill stop working, which we didn’t know. And then,” he looked away from her again, “the condom broke one night.”

  “Is she keeping the baby?”

  He nodded. “Said she wanted the baby. Apparently, the only thing she doesn’t want is me.”

  Yvonne couldn’t figure out why Denise would choose to raise a baby alone, when the father obviously wanted to marry her and was in love with her. Besides, Leo was great with kids, something she’d witnessed firsthand. Her younger cousins Darcy and Oliver adored Leo. There was no way Denise couldn’t believe he would be an awesome father.

  “Did she break up with you?” Yvonne asked.

  “Yeah.”

  “What are you going to do?”

  Leo shifted on the seat until he was facing her. “That’s what I was trying to figure out. I don’t know what to do. I can’t shirk my responsibility, can’t walk away from her, knowing she’s having my baby.”

  Leo was the most upright, honorable guy she’d ever met, if she didn’t count the men in her family.

  “Who says you have to?”

  “What?” he asked.

  “The baby is yours too. You have rights. You don’t have to be married to her to be a father to your kid. Did you tell your folks?”

  He shook his head. “Not yet. They’re going to freak the fuck out.”

  “Yeah.” Yvonne’s parents would do the same if she ended up in this situation. But she also knew that they would support and help her. “You think they’ll kick you out?”

  “No. God no. They’re not going to be happy, but they’ll stand by me. Help me sort it out. I just hate disappointing them. Hate asking…”

  He didn’t have to finish his sentence. She knew Leo, knew how much he hated asking for help. In a school full of immature, hormone-driven teenage boys, he’d always stood out, always seemed older, always the one who had his shit together.

  “They’ll help you. It’ll work out fine. Neither you nor Denise were planning to go away to college. So you’ll work out a schedule. Raise your baby together.”

  Her plan didn’t sound like one he cared for. “That every-other-weekend crap?” He shook his head. “That’s a shitty way for a kid to grow up.”

  “The baby will never know anything different. What’s normal for one person isn’t normal for the next. As long as you both love the baby and take care of it, it’ll be a lucky kid.”

  Leo fell silent for a long time and for once in her life, she shut up and let him deal with his thoughts. It wasn’t that hard to do. She was sort of reeling herself, so she sat there, swimming around in her own head, thinking about how much his life had changed and wondering how she would handle the same circumstance.

  Finally, Leo turned to her and smiled. “I’m going to be a good dad.”

  She grinned back. “You’re going to be an awesome dad.”

  Leo looked at her—and for the first time ever, Yvonne got the sense that he really saw her, not as part of their group at school, but as a real person on her own. “You’re a really good friend, Vonnie. Thanks.”

  Yvonne smiled wider, despite the tiny pang in her heart that ached at being called just a friend.

  * * *

  Yvonne had thought back to that afternoon countless times through the years as she’d watched Leo with his son, Vince. Aside from her own dad, Yvonne was certain there wasn’t a more devoted, loving father on the planet.

  “You know what?” Yvonne said. “I think you’re right, Riley. I think I’m going to have to stick my nosy Collins’ nose into this and stage an intervention.”

  Riley wiped her hands on her apron before rubbing them together with glee. There was nothing her aunt liked more than to plot a sneak attack. “Excellent. Here’s what I think you should do.”

  Chapter Two

  Leo raced down the hallway of his house, cursing at the billows of black smoke filling the kitchen. “Godda—” He pulled up short when he realized his twelve-year-old son had followed him into the room.

  “Is that dinner?” Vince asked.

  “It was dinner.”

  Vince sighed, then sank down on a chair at the table. “Does this mean we’re having pizza again?”

  The fact that a twelve-year-old boy was not excited about ordering pizza proved to Leo he’d fucked up
one too many mealtimes lately.

  “Um,” Leo said, trying to figure out what else they could order. If he had time, he’d just say screw it and take them out for dinner, but he had too many damn chores to do here, things that he’d gotten behind on.

  The sound of glass breaking had him groaning, even as he hastened to the living room.

  Clint was standing next to the end table, barefoot, pointing to the dog. “It wasn’t me. It was Boomer. He knocked over my glass of soda.”

  “Why are you drinking soda? I thought your dad said no more Coke before dinner. You won’t eat your food if you fill up on pop.”

  Vince grumbled. “Doesn’t really matter, does it? There isn’t any dinner.”

  Leo was pretty sure he wasn’t going to enjoy the teenage years with his kid. Vince was already a pretty accomplished smartass.

  “I’ll figure out dinner.”

  Clint started to move, but Leo held up his hand. “Not one step, Clint, or you’ll cut your foot. Stay there while I clean up this mess.”

  It had obviously been a full glass of soda because the sticky liquid had managed to splash over a good third of the floor. Thank God they had hardwood or he’d be heading out tomorrow to rent a carpet cleaner. Like he had time to do that.

  He returned to the kitchen to grab a dustpan and mop. As he bent over to clean up the mess, he tried to remember when he’d lost complete control of his life.

  Sadly, he knew the answer to that.

  Three years ago.

  Everything had fallen apart three years earlier.

  It had been a day just like any other day. But little did he know when he’d walked into Pat’s Pub to make his delivery that he was about to have the rug pulled out from under his feet.

  He’d been in the kitchen, chatting with Riley and Yvonne, when he’d gotten a phone call…