by Ruby Raine
And wasn’t that the real problem because she didn’t want to either.
She shifted away from him, sucking in some Charlie free air.
This wasn’t going to be easy at all.
There was no just being her.
Or just being him.
Because it meant being in love.
There wasn’t any burying that and pretending it wasn’t there. It was the most miserable middle ground Charlie had ever been stuck in. He’d thought he could take himself out of it, for Lizzy. And to protect his own heart. He’d been wrong.
“Already failing at this whole being us thing, aren’t we.” Like he’d just taken the words out of her mouth.
“No, the problem is, Charlie, this is us. But there is a man locked in your basement who I was supposed to marry. Who lived through hell for me. And I don’t know how to,” Charlie stopped her.
“We just have to be honest with each other. As difficult as that might be.”
“I don’t want to hurt you, Charlie.”
“I know. How about we take a step back, um, I guess kind of literally, maybe even a few steps, and get back to what you were saying before. About Grayson being stuck on the Isle.”
Space.
Enough neither could reach out and touch or kiss the other.
“Right. Yeah.” Lizzy followed his move. “Grayson cannot leave now. He’s stuck here, with the curse.”
“You think Charlotte wanted some final revenge on you two? Or the Isle? Or hoped he’d go on some killing spree or something?” Which he kind of had before they’d captured him.
“I can only wager a yes on that. His bloodlust is only going to increase,” she warned heavily. “His desperation for fresh human blood will make him stronger. And more dangerous. You’ll need to keep him sedated at all times. I think Charlotte wanted him to suffer, probably hoped he’d return and be so lost in the bloodlust he killed me.”
There was no holding back the growl churning in Charlie’s throat over that thought.
“At the least, I’m sure she wanted the end result of Grayson returning, to make him think he had some glimmer of hope at being cured, and then having to be killed instead anyway.”
“What a sick woman.”
“Kind of makes you wonder about reincarnation,” rattled Lizzy. Charlie cocked his head, eyeing her. “Eva... she could have been Charlotte reborn, just not a witch. But very much a bitch.”
He scowled. “They are two of a pair. I hope whatever hell they’re both in means they are suffering to the beat of an everlasting pain party.”
Lizzy grinned. Then laughed. And shook her head in complete exhaustion.
He returned it with a clipped laugh of his own.
“That actually made me feel so much better,” sighed Lizzy. “Picturing that scene. You do have a sense of humor.”
“Wasn’t meant to be funny, but it’s been known to happen. Maybe once or twice before. Remember this day though, it might not ever happen again.”
“I needed that.” She let go of some of the stress eating away at her. “Have you ever heard anywhere in your family history of witches with the power of foresight? Not like Melinda has, with death, but visions of the future?”
“No. But to be pathetically honest, William would be the one to ask. I rarely ever look into that stuff. I will though. I’ll track down the old family archives, see what I can find out. See if there happens to be anything written about this Charlotte Howard.”
“We’ve already started on that. Just thought I’d ask in case William had ever mentioned it before or something. And I don’t even think this knowledge does any good, it changes nothing really. But I guess the more we know about Charlotte, the better prepared we can be for whatever other sadistic thing she might have planned for when I break the curse.”
Charlie refused to bring up the subject of after the curse was broken, and what might happen to Grayson. That could wait for another day. Lizzy’d already had enough blows from the looks of it to last a long time.
“It’s so hard to believe we had an ancestor so revoltingly evil,” he said instead.
“Welcome to the club. Not fun, is it?”
He laughed, tightly. “No. And a strong reminder that a name really means little in the end. It’s what’s in a person’s heart and soul that matters.”
She shook her head and cursed inwardly. “You really have to stop that.”
“Sorry,” he shrugged, unclear as to what he’d done wrong.
“Being accidentally romantic and understanding as hell.” She had to fight every urge to rush over and climb all over him. Again.
“Oh, that, um...”
“Don’t apologize, Charlie. It’s like I said before. You are a hopeless romantic all the time without even trying, just by being you. And I was the one who said be ourselves.”
“I wasn’t trying to make it harder on you. But you must realize, Lizzy, I will do everything in my power to make all of this right. Whatever you decide about your future. Whatever the outcome is.”
God damn the man! Was he shooting for accidental romantic gesture of the year?
“I know you will, Charlie.” She let out a weary sigh.
“Why don’t you head home and get some rest. You look like you need it.”
She nodded. Agreeing. But added, “So do you.”
“Didn’t sleep much on the boat, but...” he wanted to tell her all about Nina, the parts he could share, but now was not the right time. Lizzy was already overwhelmed. And damn, it was going to be hard not telling her everything. Especially since not all of it concerned their possible future, but her new brothers as well. It didn’t feel right, holding back, keeping secrets. Even if it was for the Guardians, and Nina. “I think my head is on a little straighter.” It was all he managed to conclude about his time on the boat.
“Glad someone’s is.” She gave him a weak smile.
“Go. Rest.” There was nothing more to be said between them at this moment.
Lizzy spun around. “Lucas, you can come out of hiding and take me home now.”
With a sheepish shrug, he appeared in the doorway.
MELINDA WASN’T FAR behind Lucas. Lizzy rolled her eyes and headed for his truck. Lucas had been waiting just inside, assuming she’d still want to go home, but allowing them their privacy. He was surprised though when Charlie engaged him on his way by.
“How are the lessons going?” Lizzy had filled him in on what they’d been up to in between all the Grayson stuff. At first, Lucas thought he must be asking his sister but the wolf’s gaze was fixed on him.
“Oh, um, good, I guess. A lot of info trying to shove its way into this stubborn brain.”
Charlie let out a sharp chuckle.
“You’re doing just fine, Lucas.” Melinda shook her head at Charlie, wondering what he was up to, instantly suspect. Since when did he care about Lucas and his lessons in magic? Probably trying to rack up some points with Lizzy.
“I feel you about the information overload,” went on Charlie. “It should be against the law.” He swore if he turned right now, Lizzy was rolling her eyes at him; although he’d been doing more research since William had left the Isle, and was about to embark on more research about Charlotte. And curses. And the like.
“Let’s hope I can keep up,” said Lucas. “Melinda is going to be hard to beat.” He tossed her a wink.
“For goodness’ sake, it’s not a competition. Bye, Lucas. Go take your sister home already.”
“Yeah. Later.”
Even odder, Charlie gave Lucas an encouraging pat on the back as he went by.
“Really trying to rack up some karma points, aren’t we?” Melinda muttered under her breath. Charlie’s wolf hearing picking up her words perfectly.
“Oh, no. Just trying to be nice. You know. Just, because.” Shit. He was terrible at this being a good example, and leader, without telling anyone why he was. He needed to figure out how to urge Lucas in the right direction, without it being so obvious an
d out of character. And how was he going to ditch this sense of urgency in his veins? He had to remind himself they had many years ahead to make sure the Deane brothers lived worthy lives. And just as many years to keep the secret.
Michael met them at the front door, gave his brother a short wave and a tight smile.
“Come on inside. We’ll fill you in on everything Lizzy didn’t get to. Oh and ah, welcome home?”
Charlie lifted a brow, half-heartedly amused. “Is that a question?”
“Yeah, I guess it is.”
“Couldn’t stay on my boat forever. I’m sorry I left you guys to...” his sister stopped him.
“No apologies, Charlie. We only want to know that you’re okay. And don’t say you’re sorry for making us worry, and sticking us with witch stuff to take care of,” she bleated hotly.
He let out a clipped laugh. Melinda was becoming more like their mother every day. She used to say things like that to their father.
“I’m okay as I can be.”
She scrunched her nose. That was not the vague answer she was searching for.
He smirked. “Fine. I’m not okay. I think I am possibly as far from okay as I can be. My time on the boat was equally clarifying and confounding. But I do feel...” they let him take his time. “I’m glad to be home. And I’m ready to get back to work. Does that answer meet with your approval?”
“Yes.” She smiled stiffly, tossing Michael an apprehensive tug on her lips. “We’re glad you’re back too. We did worry about you, but we understand why you had to go. We um,” she shook herself nervously.
“Did you have a dream? Did something else happen?” He glanced between the two.
“No, nothing like that. We did some thinking of our own while you were gone.” And suddenly Melinda was nervous and thinking of chickening out, which was the exact opposite point she was hoping to make. “Charlie, you’re always going to be my big brother. And Michael’s,” she aimed her head at him. “And this means you’ll always freak out and act like a big brother, but, you don’t need to worry about me, not for the reasons you used to anyway. And that’s still not really what I’m trying to say.”
Charlie’s lips turned up in a smile. “We really are terrible at sharing, aren’t we?”
“That’s kind of the point. The sharing thing, the talking thing, we have to get better at it. And it can’t just be us, or others coming to you with problems to fix, and you handling everything because that’s what you do, or think you have to do. Or feel responsible to do,” she rambled. She hoped coherently.
“You can come to us too,” took over Michael. “You can, should... need to,” he corrected, “depend on us. It works both ways. Or at least it will from now on.”
Charlie stared at them, a bit stunned. Especially hearing this from Michael, who hated his job and being on the Isle, and Melinda, who only recently started embracing her life as a witch. This wasn’t the homecoming he expected.
“I will try,” he promised. “We’re all on new ground and I can’t promise not to fall into my old habits of taking lead, or acting the big brother.”
“I don’t expect you to. Neither does Michael,” clarified Melinda.
Michael nodded. “You are a natural for the job. We just don’t want you to think it has to be you, all the time.”
“We can share the responsibility. It can’t all be yours, Charlie. Even though you might officially be in charge, we don’t want that to be a burden only you carry. We do it as a family from now on. Does that make sense?” Melinda hoped it did.
Charlie didn’t know what came over him. Without a second thought about it he had his arms around them in an awkward family hug. Apparently it made perfect sense. A long overdue sibling chat that laid it all out on the table.
Michael sensed the change in his brother. Like some heavy weight had lifted. Like the clear knowledge that they were in this together, truly together, provided relief Charlie didn’t realize he needed.
“Okay, so awkward family talk over,” sniffled Melinda. She made her way into the kitchen. Michael and Charlie passed a silent nod between each other and followed her.
Courtney was there, keeping watch over Grayson.
“Hiya,” she called out from atop the kitchen counter where she was perched.
Charlie nodded in greeting. “You look good. How are you doing? Adjusting?”
“As long as I keep my belly full of that ever so delightful animal blood, and away from crowds with pulses, I’m just dandy as candy.”
He laughed, glad she’d stuck around. Her help had proven invaluable already. He only hoped they didn’t fail her while she adjusted to her new life as a vampire.
“We just gave her the daylight potion yesterday,” remarked Michael with a grin. And then a curt laugh at the memory.
“Oh sure, laugh at the scaredy-cat vampire. I’d like to see you step into the blazing sun with the full knowledge it’ll turn you into blisters and ashes.”
“It worked, I take it,” quipped Charlie.
“Perfectly. A little disappointing not to feel the heat from the sun, but no burny-burny is a beautiful thing,” she cracked. “And I cannot express what going back into the daylight means. I might be able to go back to work someday. I’m not ready yet,” she clarified pointedly. “But it’s a good step forward I think.”
“I’m glad. There’s no reason you shouldn’t be able to live an almost mirror-like life to the one you had before. Not everything can be the same, obviously, but you can reclaim a lot of it. Don’t rush yourself though, Courtney. You’re welcome here as long as it takes.”
“Thanks.”
“So, catch me up,” he told his siblings. “What else did I miss?”
They set in, graciously ignoring the biggest reason for his departure. Lizzy. He was only a man after all, no matter how hard he pretended not to be. He’d broken for a few days. It took a lot for that to happen to Charlie. And he’d been so concerned about everyone else’s wellbeing he had not taken time to mourn the loss of their father. Or that he’d had it decided in his mind, he’d have to kill William. Or just unwind from all that had happened. Period.
Which is what had gotten them talking about how things should work from now on. They were each determined they needed to make sure Charlie didn’t take on too much. And that he needed to admit when it was too much.
Charlie was grateful for his siblings taking over the last few days. Thankful to Courtney for sticking around. She was being extraordinarily understanding, even eager, to help out. He was encouraged to see his sister looking better, physically, and in a focused, energetic mood after her lessons with Lizzy. And was impressed by all Michael had accomplished on the to-do list he had not finished. And was super impressed by the alarm system he’d created around the power source in White Pines. It was meant to be temporary, but he saw no good reason it shouldn’t remain permanently.
He had to admit, these last days and weeks had been the most trying in their lives, but they were surviving, and managing, and even in all the chaos, thriving in some ways. Still broken in so many ways too, but piecing themselves back together and finding their paths forward.
And now it was time for him to do the same.
But from now on, he’d make sure to be more open with his siblings, and not take on more than he could handle.
The Mack line rang out. Clattering like doom around the Howard kitchen.
Charlie groaned. “Seriously? Didn’t we already play this game not too long ago? Me, not even thirty minutes’ home...” This is how their nightmarish summer had begun. Right before they’d first encountered Eva Jordan under the water in Bloodsucker Bay. They were the ones who’d ended up getting suckered... duped into her deranged plans.
Melinda did the duty of grabbing the line this time. “Hiya Mack, what’s-”
“There’s been an accident.” Melinda sucked in, Mack’s tone, a gruesome warning. “Get to the hospital. I’m heading there now.”
Charlie heard, so did Courtney.
Michael sensed the dread.
“Who?” squeaked out Melinda.
“Lucas and Lizzy. They’re alive, but Lizzy is... shit. Just get to the damn hospital. I’m behind the ambulance we’ll be there soon.”
Click.
The sheriff hung up.
Melinda let the phone fall.
Of all the things... her eyes lifted and met Charlie’s.
“Go.”
There was a brief moment he could not go. Not even move, or breathe.
And suddenly his legs moved without his request, running as if his life would end if he stopped.
“Lucas and Lizzy were in some kind of accident,” Melinda explained to Michael.
“How? They left not thirty minutes ago.”
Melinda did a full body shrug. “Mack said they’re alive, but,” vomit threatened to surface. Michael reached out and grasped her arm to steady her. “The way she sounded. Oh, Michael. I think something really bad happened to Lizzy.”
There was an anguished cry from the basement.
Grayson. His vampire hearing was getting better again.
The werewolf blood was getting out of his system. They almost felt bad for him, hearing this news, helpless and tied up. But recounting the innocent victims he’d killed dampened that sympathy.
Michael had a fleeting thought of panic that it was night. Nothing like a vamp in agony over the one he loved to up the odds of escape. And Grayson would only be able to at night seeing as he was not given any daylight potion.
“When did we last dose him with werewolf blood?”
“This morning,” Courtney answered. “It was the last vial.”
“I meant to have Charlie give us more.” Melinda tossed her hands up. “What now?”
“Um, I’ll stay here,” offered Michael. “Courtney, you stay with me?”
“Yeah, sure.”
“Melinda, go make sure Charlie doesn’t lose his fricking mind and keep us updated on what’s happening. And if the moment arises, remind him we really need more of his blood.”
“I’ll look around,” promised Courtney. “I might have missed a vial.”
Michael grabbed a couple empty vials and handed them to his sister. She tucked them into a sweater pocket and took off. She drove the jeep, fully aware that Charlie even on foot, would beat her there.