Do It Or Else: A High School Bully Romance (Dirty Little Secret Book 3)
Page 11
"Do you think I'm harsh with you, son?"
"No. I think you're just being a father."
"Lies!" He slaps me across the face. "Your mother told me what you said! How I was mistreating you. How you hated living here." He grabs my shirt with both hands and yanks me toward him. "You want to see me mistreat you, Briggs?"
"No." I shake my head.
His expression turns dark and his eyes fill with rage. He shoves me, slamming me against the door. My shoulder hits the latch on the lock and my back hits the handle, causing searing pain because he shoved me so fucking hard. As I push away from the door, he punches me in the stomach. I slam back into the door, then fall to the ground, my breath caught in my throat, my gut throbbing.
"THAT is a father mistreating his son!" He storms down to his office and slams the door.
I take a moment to breathe, then slowly stand up. I pick up my laptop bag and make my way up the stairs. I go in my room, strip off my clothes, and take a long hot shower, sinking down on the tile floor as the water falls over me.
I feel nothing right now. Nothing but emptiness. Why do I keep doing this? Why do I even try to go on? What's the point?
Why would my mother tell him that? She had to know telling him would only make it worse. She knows him. She knows he doesn't like being told he's doing something wrong. Praise and compliments are all he'll accept. Say anything else, any kind of criticism, he'll punish you.
After the shower, I get in bed, not having the energy to do my paper. I'll have to get up early to finish it, or maybe I'll just turn it in halfway done and take whatever grade I can get. I'm not going to be valedictorian, so what's the point? My dad will find out I'm second in my class and beat me until I'm close to death. If I'm lucky, I'll die and finally be set free from this hell.
My phone rings from my nightstand. I ignore it and turn away, covering my head with a pillow. A few minutes later, it rings again. It's probably Parker, drunk and high, calling to tell me some stupid story. He'll keep calling until l pick up, just to piss me off.
I reach over and grab the phone. "What do you want?"
"Briggs?"
It's Ella. What the hell?
"Yeah, sorry, I thought you were Parker." I sit up, leaning against the pillow. "If this about the assignment, I'm not—"
"It's not about the assignment."
"Then what's it about?"
"Principal Perkins talked to me today."
"About what?"
"About what you told him. About someone trying to change my grades. He said they're improving their online security."
"Good," I say, not sure why she's telling me this. "Was that it? I have a lot to do tonight."
"Oh. I was kind of hoping we could meet."
I check the clock. "It's after eight."
"Why does that matter?"
"It doesn't. Forget it. So what do you want to meet about?"
"I don't really have an agenda. I just...I need to see you."
"Why? What's going on?"
"Nothing. I just..."
"You what?"
"I miss you," she says really fast, like she had to get the words out before she changed her mind.
I smile. "You miss me? Is this a joke?"
"Unfortunately, no."
"Why is that unfortunate?"
"Because I don't want to miss you. I'm trying not to, but the more I try, the more I miss you."
"We just saw each other at school."
"It's not the same." She pauses. "Never mind. I shouldn't have called. I'll let you get back to what you were doing. Bye, Briggs."
"Ella, wait!"
"Yeah?"
I hesitate, knowing I shouldn't say it, but unable to stop myself. "I miss you too."
"Is this a joke?"
I smile. "Unfortunately, no."
"Why is that unfortunate?"
"It just is."
"I know what you mean."
I get out of bed. "Where do you want to meet?"
"We don't have to. It's late, and it sounds like you're busy doing stuff."
"I'm not. I mean, I should be, but I'm not." I grab a t-shirt from my drawer. "Pick a place to meet and I'll be there."
"The park. The one a few blocks from the school."
"You want to meet at a park?"
"I want to lie in the back of my truck and look up at the stars," she says, her voice lifting like she's excited about this. "Would you do it? I'll put a blanket down so you don't get dirty."
"I'm not worried about that, and yes, I'll do it. Are you leaving right now?"
"In a few minutes. I'll see you there."
I yank on my jeans and put on the t-shirt, and go check myself in the bathroom mirror. My face looks okay. It was red after my father slapped me, but it's back to normal now. It just stings when I touch it. As for my body, I don't see any bruises, at least not with clothes on. And if the clothes come off, it'll be dark. She won't be able to see.
Lifting up my shirt, I turn around, checking the bruise on my back where it hit the door handle. It's red and the swelling's getting worse. There's a smaller bruise up by my shoulder.
Facing the mirror again, I see the bruise on my stomach where he punched me. It's bad, but not as bad as I thought it'd look. Most of the damage is below the skin. It hurts every time I breathe or when I'm getting up and down from the bed. Rugby practice and gym workouts are gonna be a bitch until this heals. How the hell am I going to explain this if one of the guys sees me in the locker room? I'll have to say I got hit during a game and hope they believe me.
I spray on some cologne, then grab my keys and sneak down the back staircase that leads to the kitchen. I slowly and quietly make my way through the kitchen to the garage. I get in my car and start the engine as I hit the garage door button. It takes forever for the damn door to open and I'm almost certain my dad's going to run out here and try to stop me. The door finally rises and I drive out of the garage and take off.
When I'm on the road, I let out the breath I was holding, not even caring how much it hurts my stomach. I got away from my father and I'm going to see Ella. Those two things are enough to put a fucking smile on my face. I don't have much to smile about, so I take what I can get. There's a good chance my father will beat me when I get home for not telling him I was going out, but I don't care. He'll be so drunk by the time I get back, he won't have the strength to hit me very hard. If I'm lucky, he'll be passed out.
At the park, I see Ella's truck at the very end of the lot. I drive over there and park and see her standing in front of her truck, looking up at the sky.
I jump out of the car and run up behind her, grabbing her around the waist. "See anything good?"
She whips around to face me, a big smile on her face. "I do now."
I smile back. "I meant the stars."
She hugs me, pressing her face against my chest. "I'm sorry, Briggs."
"For what?"
"For not believing you."
"Don't worry about it. I don't have the best track record with telling the truth."
"But this time you did." She looks up at me. "And I should've believed you after Charlotte told me about you going to the principal."
"Charlotte told you?"
"She overheard you guys talking. She said you wouldn't go to the principal if you were the one who called Calvin. You said the same thing, but I didn't want to believe you."
"Ella, just forget it. We don't need to talk about it."
"I do. I need to explain." She takes a breath. "You kept saying you had to be valedictorian, and that you'd do anything to make it happen. I just assumed this was you following through on your plan. I didn't even give you the benefit of the doubt."
"Ella, it's okay. I would've thought the same thing if I were you. I was just hoping that maybe by now you'd know I'd changed and wouldn't do that to you."
"I wasn't sure, but I should've at least given you a chance."
I step back and take her hand. "Want to go look at some stars?
"
We walk around to the back of her truck.
"I put some sleeping bags down," she says, "but it's still kind of a mess. You might get some dirt on you, and probably some grass."
"I don't care. I got grass on me last night helping you sweep the sidewalk."
She hops up in the truck bed with no effort at all while I grab hold of the side, trying not to cringe from the pain as I pull myself up.
"My dad was really impressed with your sweeping skills," Ella says as she lays down on the sleeping bag.
"Any chance he'd give me a job?" I ask, laying beside her.
She laughs. "I can't imagine you doing that for a job. Besides, you already have one, working for your dad."
"Yeah," I mutter, wishing I could tell her the truth. I'm so sick of hiding everything, not being able to talk about this with someone.
What would Ella say if I told her? Would she think less of me for not standing up to my father? I want to stand up to him, but I can't make myself do it. I'm afraid of what he'd do if I ever did. But I've fantasized about it. I've imagined myself punching him in the face so hard he slams into the wall. If I actually did that, he'd come back at me twice as hard, and he wouldn't stop until I was unconscious, or dead. Then he'd blame me, saying I attacked him and that it was self defense.
"Briggs?" Ella says. "Are you okay? You got really quiet."
I want to tell her, but I can't. So I won't.
Chapter Twelve
Ella
Briggs turns to face me. "Did you really miss me, or was that just an excuse to get me to come out here with you so you weren't all alone in the dark?"
"Damn, you figured it out." I look up at the sky. "I asked you to come here because I thought you'd be able to fight off a pack of wolves or coyotes or whatever else is out here."
He chuckles. "We're in the city. There's nothing out here but squirrels and raccoons. And maybe an owl," he says as we hear one make a noise.
I look at him. "I missed you. That's why I wanted to see you."
He leans over and kisses me. "I missed you too."
"What are we doing, Briggs? I mean us. What is this?"
"I don't know. We keep asking that question and we never seem to have an answer."
"Whatever it is, it's not going to last. We're both going to college soon and will probably never see each other again."
"Do you know where you're going?"
"No. So far I've had two rejections. I'm still waiting to hear from Stanford but I'm applying to other schools in case I don't get in."
"Stanford," he says. "Is that really where you want to go?"
"If they accept me, then yeah. I was kind of hoping to leave California just to try something new, but I don't mind staying here. What about you? Where are you going?"
"I haven't decided."
"Where did you apply?"
"A lot of places. I don't want to talk about it." He lays on his back. "I thought we came here to look at the stars."
"And do other stuff," I say in a flirty way.
"Like what?" he says, looking up at the sky.
I move so I'm straddling him.
"You're kind of blocking my view," he says.
"You want me to move?"
"Hell no." He reaches up and cups the back of my head, gently pulling me down to his face to kiss me. It's a slow, deep kiss that causes tingles to go through me. God, I've missed this. I've missed it so much. I've missed everything about him. Feeling his lips on mine. Feeling his strong arms around me. Feeling his hands move over my skin. It's like we're right back to where we left off, like the time we had apart never happened.
I lower down, extending my body over his, moving up just enough so that the length of him is between my legs. Even through my denim skirt, I can feel how hard he is, and it fuels my desire, sparking an intense need to feel him inside me again.
"Ella," he groans as I move my hips, grinding against him. I love that I'm turning him on. It makes me want him even more.
His hand slides up the back of my shirt. He flicks open my bra and runs his hand over my skin, softly, gently, up and down my back. It feels intimate, loving, like he truly cares about me. I don't know if he really does, but I don't want to think about that right now.
He slides his other hand under my skirt, quickly discovering that I'm not wearing panties.
"Fuck," he groans, breaking from the kiss. "You're killing me, Ella."
"I thought it'd make things easier." I kiss his cheek and notice him tensing up. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing." He flips me over on my back and lays on his side, facing me. "Maybe we should wait."
"Briggs Chadwick wants to wait to have sex?" I smile. "Are you feeling okay?"
"I want to do it, but not if we're just going to go back to being enemies tomorrow."
I turn to him. "Briggs, I'm done being angry. I know you didn't do those things. It just took me awhile to believe you. And now we have the whole valedictorian thing behind us so we won't be fighting about that anymore."
He looks down.
"What is it? Is there something you're not telling me?"
He sighs. "My father still thinks it's going to happen. He's told everyone I'm valedictorian."
"Just explain to him you're not."
"It's not that easy. If you knew him, you'd know why."
"I don't know what that means. Will he punish you? Yell at you? What?"
He looks to the side and blows out a breath.
"Briggs, what's going on?"
He doesn't answer.
"I wish you'd just tell me why this is such a big deal."
"He'll take away the car," Briggs blurts out.
"Yeah? So? Buy another one. Don't you have a trust fund?"
"No. My dad gives me money when he thinks I deserve it."
"Deserve it? What does that mean?"
"It means I do what he says," Briggs says, his jaw tightening.
"What does he want you to do? You're already the perfect son. You get good grades. You're good at sports. What else does he want?"
"For me to be valedictorian."
"He's just going to have to accept that you're not. He should be happy you're in second place. Devonshore is a really hard school and you're second in our class. You even beat out all the smart tech guys."
"Only because they suck at English."
"Still, it's a big accomplishment. Your dad should be proud." I run my hand up and down his back like he did to me.
"Don't," he says, jerking away.
"You don't want me to touch you?"
"I do, but I'm sore from the game. I got beat up pretty bad."
"The game was almost a week ago."
"Guess I haven't healed yet."
"Did you get hit in the face?"
"No. Why?"
"You tensed up when I kissed your cheek."
He lays on his back and looks up at the sky. "We'd see the stars better if we drove out of town."
"I can't go out there again, not until all this is over. I may never go on that road again."
"You will. It'll just take some time."
I look at him with concern. There's something he's not telling me. I think he wants to, but he won't.
"Briggs, you know you can tell me anything, right?"
"I know," he mutters, his eyes still aimed at the sky.
I lay my head on his chest. "You really don't want to do it?"
He puts his arm around me. "I just want to do this."
Something's definitely wrong. Briggs turning down sex? I didn't even think that was possible. Something's obviously bothering him, but what? Did he go back to Aubrey when he and I were apart? Did they have sex, and now he feels guilty and doesn't want to do it with me?
There I go again, thinking the worst. I need to stop doing that. I need to give Briggs a chance, at least the one I'm with now. This is the guy I missed. He comes and goes, but when he appears I can't get enough of him. And now that I have him lying beside me, I'm not going t
o let my mind wander to all the bad places it wants to go.
"I like this," Briggs says, kissing my forehead.
"I like it too."
We stay there for an hour before going home.
I'm worried about Briggs. He wasn't himself tonight. He was really quiet, and he kept tensing up when he moved. He seemed to be in a lot of pain. I know rugby's a tough sport and the guys get hit a lot, but Parker never acts like he's in pain. Maybe the other team goes after Briggs more than anyone else because he's our best player. I have no idea what he even does in the game. I should go to one and see him play.
In the morning before I leave for school, I text Briggs. I'm going to your game tonight.
I thought you didn't like sports.
I don't, but I want to see you play.
Can you meet me before class? I forgot to tell you something.
Ok. I'm leaving right now.
Does he really want to talk, or does he want to finish what we started last night? I'm still worked up from that. I can't believe Briggs stopped us. I know he wanted to do it. I could feel how ready he was, so why'd he stop us?
When I get to school, I go down to the bleachers. Briggs is already there, looking at his phone.
I walk over to him, stopping right in front of him, my face tilted up for a kiss. "Hey."
He smiles and puts his phone away, then leans down to kiss me.
"Did you really want to talk?" I ask. "Or was that code for something else?"
"I'd like it to be something else, but I don't have much time. I have to finish a paper before class. I was going to do it last night, but I got distracted." His arms go around me.
"You should've told me. We didn't have to meet."
"I wanted to. I needed that."
"So what did you want to talk about?"
"Ms. Higgins." He checks to make sure we're alone. "The other day I saw Ms. Higgins yelling at Jason for punching that tech geek, Donovan."
"Why did he punch him?"
"He said Donovan looked at him the wrong way. Anyway, Ms. Higgins gave Jason this speech about how she's sick of guys on the team picking on geeks like Donovan. She has to be the person sending the texts. Telling us to eat lunch with someone we make fun of? That's totally something Ms. Higgins would do. And she didn't include you because you get bullied, like the geeks. She's know I'm a bully, and Finn and Parker. It makes total sense she'd make us do that shit."