The Beach House

by Rachel Hanna

  "Okay, what's really going on?"

  SuAnn cocked her head to the side like a dog who had heard a loud noise. "What do you mean?"

  "You know what I mean. Something is obviously going on with Janine. You didn't just bring her here to help me. You're dumping her here, and I want to know why."

  "I'm not dumping her. I just can't handle her anymore. She's been staying with me for six months now."

  "And you're just now telling me this? What's going on with her?"

  SuAnn took in a deep breath and sighed. "I can't say anything. I don't want to betray her confidence. But your sister needs you right now, and if you were honest with yourself you would admit that you need her too. So I am giving you this time with her."

  "Again, you're dumping her here. I didn't need another project, Mom.”

  "I can't believe you would say that about your own sister. What is wrong with you? You barely come around your family anymore. Buddy and I were talking about it just the other day."

  "I barely know the man."

  "That's because you don't come around. I'm trying to pull our family back together, Julie. I'm not getting any younger."

  "Mom, please don't pull the age card on me. You've been doing that my whole life."

  "Well, I am getting older and I don't know how long I'll be here. I'd like to see my daughters get along, even if it’s just for my benefit.”

  Julie took a deep breath and blew it out slowly, trying everything she could to calm down. Her life had been such a whirlwind lately that she didn't even know which end was up. And her fight was getting weaker. She just didn't feel like arguing with her mother anymore.

  “Fine. I will make my best effort, but I can't make any guarantees. There's a lot of history between me and Janine, and I honestly don't know how that can be fixed. But I will try if she will."

  A smile spread across SuAnn’s face. "That's my girl. I knew I could count on you. I'm going to head back up to see my beloved Buddy and rest easy knowing that both of my daughters are in good hands with each other."

  She quickly hugged Julie, not something she did lightly, and trotted off to her car. As she pulled out of the driveway and down the long dirt road, Julie wondered what in the world she had gotten herself into.

  When she walked back into the house, Janine was nowhere to be found. Had she already run away? Had she found a cute guy down by the marsh that Julie hadn't seen previously?

  She walked toward the back deck and found her sister standing there, staring out into the murky abyss, her eyes closed. She was taking in a slow deep breath.

  "Are you okay?”

  Janine laughed softly. "I just had a very long drive with our mother. What do you think?"

  "I can see your point. So, I guess I should give you an update on what's going on around here."

  Janine turned around, and again Julie was taken with how she looked so different. Gone was the perfectly coiffed hair and the funky fashion choices. Instead, she looked very plain, with little make up. She was wearing a basic pair of blue jeans, a simple white T-shirt and sneakers. This wasn't the Janine she remembered.

  "I bought this place sight unseen, obviously. I almost turned around and left when I got here but I ended up staying at what I thought was a little inn on the other end of the island for a night."

  “You thought it was an inn? You mean, it wasn't?"

  "Long story, but the man who owns the inn has offered to help me renovate this place for a really good deal."

  "You mean he's interested in you."

  "No, Janine, contrary to what you may think, not everything is about relationships with men.”

  "If there's one thing I know, it's that men don't do anything without a reason. He's interested in you. Or at least there’s some ulterior motive."

  "My, Janine, are you a bit jaded these days?"

  "No. I just know how men are. You were married for too long. I just know that men don't do anything without a reason."

  "Well, you can think what you want, but he's a nice guy and my only friend on the island, so I took him up on the offer. Absolutely nothing is going to happen. I'm done with men for a while, maybe forever."

  Janine turned back around and looked at the marsh. "I see you're still a little overly dramatic."

  “Look, I didn’t invite you here, Janine. You were thrust upon me, so I’d really appreciate it if you could try to be nice.”

  “Me? Try to be nice? Are you serious right now?”

  “What?”

  “Julie, everybody knows I’m the nice one.” Janine turned and walked back inside the house. Dawson was standing in the kitchen, sanding the baseboards on his hands and knees. He didn’t look up.

  “You’re the nice one? Maybe flighty. Maybe strange. Perhaps loud and obnoxious. But nice? I don’t think so.”

  Now, they were getting louder. These were the kinds of arguments that had gotten worse in their adult years. Yelling, screaming, name calling. It was embarrassing, but seemed necessary at the time.

  “Obnoxious? I’m not the one who married the idiot who cheated on me with another woman and had a baby. Great picking skills you have there, sis.”

  “At least I was able to find a husband! You’re an old maid!”

  “Free. What I am is free. No strings. Happy.”

  “Yeah, you sure look happy,” Julie retorted, rolling her eyes. Dawson rose to his feet slowly and slipped out the back door, obviously uncomfortable. She wouldn’t be surprised if he walked back to his house and never showed up for work again.

  Julie looked back at her sister. Janine was staring at her, tears rolling down her face, mouth clamped shut. Never, in all of their crazy arguments, had Janine shed a tear. Neither of them had, really. There was too much anger.

  “Janine? What’s wrong?” Her sisterly instinct told her to reach out and touch Janine, but she didn’t.

  “You’re right. I’m not happy.”

  “I can see that.”

  “I’ve been living with Mom for six months, sleeping in the guest room amongst her craft supplies.”

  “What has happened to you, Janine?”

  “Like you care.” Janine walked over to the wall and slid down to the floor, her knees pulled to her chest. She stared straight ahead.

  Julie didn’t know what to say or do. She just froze in place for a moment, fully aware that her only sister was in a lump on the floor. She slowly walked over and sat down a few feet away, pulling her knees up too.

  “I do care.”

  “Yeah, right. I bet you fought Mom tooth and nail to keep her from leaving me here.”

  Julie paused. “It still doesn’t mean that I don’t care.”

  “Trust me, I didn’t want to come here in the first place.”

  “Then why did you? Did she guilt trip you too?”

  “No. She kicked me out.”

  Julie looked at her. “What? Kicked you out? For what reason?”

  Janine sighed. “For having problems. You know how our mother likes to keep up appearances. I was apparently embarrassing her.”

  “How were you embarrassing her?”

  “I wasn’t you.”

  “What?”

  “You’ve always been her favorite, Julie. You know that.”

  “Actually, I’ve always thought the opposite.”

  Janine looked over, her head tilted. “Seriously? Mom always bragged on you, even posted on social media a few times about your perfect little family.”

  “That was just to impress her friends at the country club.”

  “Right. And nothing I’ve ever done has impressed her.”

  “So, you’re telling me she kicked you out because you weren’t up to her standards? Come on, Janine, she’s not that bad. There has to be more to this story.”

  Janine turned her head and stared off into space, something that seemed to be typical for her now. The bubbly, vivacious, take no prisoners personality that she’d had her entire life seemed to be gone, gobbled up by what appeared t
o be depression or something similar.

  “The last couple of years have been difficult. I’ve had some real struggles, and when I couldn’t make it on my own anymore, I turned to my mother. She tried to help, in her own ‘SuAnn way’, but I think she just couldn’t take seeing me like this anymore. So, she told me we were coming to see you. I didn’t want to come, but she packed my bag and told me that I could no longer stay with her. I didn’t have anywhere else to go.”

  "So you don't have a job or anything?"

  "I haven't had a job in a couple of years. Like I said, I've had some difficulties."

  Julie stood up and put her hands on her hips. "Janine, you're too old for this. Why don't you have a job? You need to be able to support yourself. I'm sorry, but you can't just live here without working or contributing ."

  Janine put her face in her hands. "This isn't about being lazy, Julie. I can't function very well right now."

  "I don't understand. It seems like both you and Mom aren't telling me something, and I deserve to know, especially if you want to stay at my house for free. I mean I'm right in the middle of a remodel. I can't take on another mouth to feed when I can barely afford myself."

  "If I had anywhere else to go, trust me, I would!" Janine stood up, and it was the first bit of energy Julie had seen out of her since she arrived.

  "You know, you've been like this your whole life. You expect to just be able to galavant all over the world and do whatever you want to do and everybody else has to pick up the pieces. Well you know what? Life isn't like that! Life is hard! You have to work and be an adult!"

  Tears streamed down Janine’s face again. "You're right. This is all my fault. It's totally my fault that I was attacked."

  "Attacked?"

  "Two years ago. I was in the Caribbean, teaching yoga at this little place near a resort. One night, after a class, I was walking to my bungalow that I rented. I didn't make it there."

  Julie felt like her insides were caving in. She couldn't take a breath. The image of her sister being attacked in a foreign country with no one to help her made her feel like her guts were being ripped out.

  "I had no idea."

  "Nobody else knows."

  "Wait. Mom doesn't know?"

  "No. That's not exactly the kind of thing I want to talk to her about. Plus, she would find a way to blame it on me. And, honestly, I blame it on me."

  "Janine, it’s not your fault. No person deserves to be attacked."

  "Maybe I did. I wasn't paying attention. I trusted my surroundings. I had been there for over six months, and I just wasn't careful. I left my mace at home…"

  Julie walked over to her sister and put her hands on her upper arms. "Janine, this is not your fault. And I think you should tell Mom. I'm sure she would let you stay there if she knew."

  "Julie, I don't want to tell her. There's nothing she can do about it. And it wouldn't make her understand what I'm going through any more than she does right now. I think she kind of knows something happened, but I don't really think she wants to know the details."

  Julie stepped back. "You're probably right. Have you had any counseling?"

  "Unemployed people don't really have access to health insurance or money for counselors. Mom kept pushing me to get a real job, told me to stop teaching yoga to hippies."

  Julie chuckled. "That sounds like Mom."

  "Over time, I started to treat the trauma my own way.”

  Julie looked at her sister, and it dawned on her. "Do you have an eating disorder, Janine?”

  "Is it that obvious?"

  "To me it is. You have to get some help. This could be life-threatening."

  "Look, I know you don't want me to stay here any more than I want to be here. But, maybe this could be a fresh start for me. At least I can be here to help you get this place in order. Maybe that will help get me out of my funk."

  "You can stay here. But, this is more than just a funk. You have to get help. We will find you a counselor on the mainland."

  "I can't afford that, Julie. And I don't think you can either."

  "We will figure it out. I know we haven't been close since we were kids, but you're still my sister, and I'm going to help you."

  Janine smiled sadly. "I hope I'm not beyond help."

  "Nobody is beyond help. Well, except for maybe my ex-husband."

  And that was the first time she saw Janine truly smile.

  Chapter 7

  Julie walked outside and sat down on a wrought iron bench near the marsh’s edge. It was the only place she’d found where she could truly be alone with her thoughts. Janine had helped her clean more of the house, and they’d set up a makeshift bedroom they could share until Dawson had gotten more of the work done. Sharing a room with her sister again when they were both in their 40’s wasn’t something she’d exactly had on her bucket list.

  She’d also had a long talk with her daughter, Colleen, about her actions. Telling her mother where she was and what was really going on wasn’t her place, but Julie could hardly be mad at her. She missed her too much.

  “You okay?” she heard Dawson say from behind her.

  “Oh, hey. I thought you’d already left for the day. It’s almost supper time, isn’t it?”

  He walked closer and stood at the end of the bench. “I ate a sandwich from my cooler an hour or so ago.”

  “Go home, Dawson. Enjoy your evening.”

  “Mind if I sit for a minute before I go?”

  She smiled and patted the seat next to her. “Sorry you had to hear all that craziness earlier.”

  “That’s why I wanted to check and see if you were good.”

  She chuckled. “No, I’m not good yet. Maybe one day I will be. But, I’m okay, and that’s enough for right now.”

  “So, that’s your sister?”

  “Yes. That’s my sister. As you can tell, we’ve had a tumultuous history with each other.”

  “Seems that way,” he said, a quirk of a smile on his face. He kicked a mound of stray moss with his boot, sending it closer to the water’s edge.

  “We were close as kids, but we’re just so different.”

  “Different how?”

  “How long do you have?” she asked with a laugh.

  “As long as you need,” he said, sending chills up her back that she hadn’t expected. There was no doubt this guy was handsome, like some kind of Southern god that had risen up from the marshy waters beyond. But, she was nowhere close to falling in love again. Michael’s so-called love had wrecked her heart.

  “Janine is what you’d probably call a ‘free spirit’. As long as I can remember, she did what she wanted without a care in the world. She believed in magic and fairies and unicorns, hung out with the strangest people and just wouldn’t settle down. She traveled the world, teaching yoga, burning incense and trying to save the planet. Meanwhile, I had the typical little white picket fence life in suburbia with my husband and two kids.”

  “Yeah, but people are different all the time. Why don’t you two get along?”

  “When we were kids, it was fun having a quirky sister. But as we got older, she just wasn’t there for me. She was always traveling, and I was lucky to get a postcard. I guess I just got used to my soccer mom lifestyle. I got used to not having her around.”

  “I had a brother like that. He worked on Wall Street, of all things. Stock trader.”

  “Past tense?”

  “He died a few years ago. Heart attack from all the stress. That’s when I decided I wasn’t leaving this island. There’s no stress on Seabreeze.”

  “My sister may have brought it,” Julie said with a tired laugh.

  “So did you have a falling out?”

  “Somewhat. Janine came back around more when my girls were young. She started visiting, but when I learned that she was giving life advice to my teenagers, I had to put my foot down. She’d almost convinced my oldest to join the Peace Corps.”

  “And that was bad?”

  Julie shrugg
ed her shoulders. “I guess I had this vision in my mind of my daughters going to college, getting married, raising families of their own. Janine giving them life advice wasn’t what I wanted.”

  “Because you wanted them to be like you and not like her,” he said, matter-of-factly.

  Julie was offended. “No, that wasn’t it at all. I just didn’t like the advice she was giving them.”

  “Sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

  “It’s fine. I’m just a little raw lately. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

  Dawson stood and smoothed out his jeans. “Look, I don’t want to step on any toes, but can I give you a little piece of advice?”

  “Of course.”

  “Life is very short, and it sounds like you’re getting a second chance with your only sister. Don’t waste it. I wish I had a second chance with my brother.”

  Julie nodded. “I get what you mean.”

  “Goodnight, Julie,” he said, before walking toward the front of the house.

  She stared back over the marsh, and watched the sun rapidly descend below the horizon, leaving trails of orange and pink in the sky. As she walked back toward the house, she thought about how her life was now a series of new beginnings. Divorced. New house. New male friend who she was determined would remain only a friend. And now her sister.

  How in the world would she handle this new life of hers?

  It was pitch black dark when Julie walked back into the house. Her sister was sitting in their makeshift bedroom, a candle lit and her eyes closed as she sat on the floor in a cross legged position.

  This was more like the Janine she knew. She was probably meditating to some higher power. As long as she didn't start chanting or summoning spirits, Julie decided to leave her alone. She walked back to the kitchen in search of something to eat for dinner, grabbing a battery powered lantern on her way.

  "I wasn't meditating, by the way,” Janine suddenly said from behind her.

  "I didn't ask," Julie said as she continued to rummage around in her cooler and bags. With two of them to feed, she would have to go back for more supplies in a couple days.