Sliding Doors

by Karen Klyne

  Laurel frowned slightly and looked sympathetic. “Could take a few months. Just take it easy. Your mum’s really proud of the business you’ve built up, you know. Who’d have thought it when you look back to our school days, eh?”

  “Well, you’ve done well for yourself too.”

  “Can’t complain. But I have two kids and a husband. It’s hard to juggle work around them. You were wise. You always said that work came first.”

  Now that is a first. When she’d given up on her career choice, she’d given up on the notion of working altogether. “Hmm. Maybe I should slow down and spend some more time with Mum.”

  Laurel raised her eyebrows. “She’d love that. She gets lonely…since your dad died.”

  Gemma nodded. “Do you know, I’ve lost track of how long she’s been with me.”

  Laurel punched her playfully on the arm. “That’s because you work too hard. Anyway, let’s see, it’s about three months now. Another month or so, and she’ll be able to go back home.” Laurel seemed to be waiting for a response.

  “We’ll see.”

  She spent the rest of the evening quizzing Laurel about her life and the joys of marriage and parenthood. Apart from that, the only thing she learned was that she was a workaholic, just like her dad. At least that was something she could discuss with her mum.

  When it got to eleven-thirty, Gemma called a taxi. She dropped Laurel off first, thinking it was a good idea to find out where she lived. They held onto each other for support and giggled all the way home. She was used to drinking, but a drop hadn’t passed her lips since she’d arrived. Mind you, that hadn’t been long. Still, she hadn’t craved it, not like she did at home. It was early days, but it was a good sign.

  They said their good-byes and agreed to meet up again. She meant it. She’d only had one real friend before, and that hadn’t lasted very long. The prospect filled her with happiness.

  She paid the taxi driver and tottered up the driveway. She managed to get inside and stagger quietly up the stairs, careful not to wake her mum. When she closed her door, she sat on her bed and giggled. She couldn’t remember doing much giggling before. Her life hadn’t been giggle-worthy. She’d always had the headaches and the bad thoughts. One day high, and two days low. It seemed like a pattern, but the high days had become less frequent, like one a month. She hadn’t had a low day since the switch, and she prayed she’d left them all behind. She hoped nobody else had inherited them.

  She plumped up her pillows and lay on top of the duvet with her hands behind her head, thinking about the life she’d left behind. It was sad to think she’d never see her mum and dad again. They’d been good parents, even if they’d never been close. They worked all the hours God sent, her dad in a DIY store and her mum in a supermarket. They’d had a rough life, but they’d made the most of it. Gemma smiled. They were happy now, thanks to her gran leaving them that bit of money. They’d lumped it with their savings and gone off to Spain for their dream life. Her gran had left her a bit too, but she’d blown it on a one-off holiday in Ibiza with Tracy, her one and only mate. God, they’d had themselves a ball. Drinking, clubbing, and dancing until God knows what time. Slept it off on the beach. Two weeks was all it took, and her money had gone. Worth it though, for the memory.

  She’d had a few boyfriends along the way but nothing serious. Then, when she was twenty-one, she’d met Reece, who was gorgeous and sexy and smart. She’d never understood why Reece had given her a second look, given how different they were. It had been fun, and Reece had fulfilled her dreams of travel and hot sex. She’d been okay whilst they’d been gallivanting and keeping things light. Reece would never have contemplated having children with her if she’d known about Gemma’s depression and mood swings. Gemma would have lost her, and she wasn’t prepared to give up a life that had made the depression recede to a point she felt almost normal, whatever that word meant. Problem was, she hadn’t realised that childbirth meant pain, nappies, and sleepless nights. She didn’t know it meant boring, either. It took away everything fun, and the emotional darkness she’d been dealing with since she was a teenager resurfaced with a vengeance. Then Reece expected her to turn into a domestic goddess. That hadn’t worked. Not by a country mile.

  So now she could start over and be who she wanted to be, in a way. She just had to make Alex’s life into the kind she wanted to live. She hoped she was up to the task.

  Chapter Eight

  Reece looked uncomfortable, and Alex could tell she wanted to leave. She looked as if she was racking her brain to find something to say.

  “So, how is the food now?”

  Alex shrugged. “Edible. They try, and most people seem to like it. There’s nothing fresh. Their idea of a salad is a piece of limp lettuce and an over ripe tomato.” Alex laughed. “I got really excited last night…I saw there were peaches for dessert, but it turned out they were out of a tin and covered in syrup.”

  “I didn’t realise…I mean, you didn’t used to like salad and fresh fruit.”

  “Didn’t I? Well, I’d kill for some now.”

  Reece shook her head. “I’m so sorry. I should have asked. I’ll send some in tomorrow. I’ll make some salads up. I’m sure they won’t object. And I’ll send fresh fruit too.”

  Alex leaned forward and covered Reece’s hand, genuinely touched by the offer. “Thank you so much. You’re an angel.” Reece put her other hand on top of Alex’s and stroked it gently. They were warm, soft, and comforting. Goose bumps formed on her skin, and her hand began to twitch.

  Reece moved her hands away and reached for her paper cup. She cleared her throat. “Have you met anyone to talk to?”

  Alex grimaced. “Not really. Maybe I ought to take a closer look. There must be somebody interesting.” Poor Reece. She was sure she’d have better things to do, like spend time with her children. “Talking of food, it’s almost time for dinner.”

  “A bit early, isn’t it?”

  “Yeah. I’d much prefer flexible times, but it’s five-thirty or you go without.”

  Reece got up. “I’d better be off then. Stay positive, Gemma. You’ve got something to look forward to tomorrow. I’ll drop your mum and dad off at four and pick them up later. And I won’t forget to send the supplies in with them.”

  “Thanks, Reece. I do appreciate it.” Alex was sorry she’d been unkind to Reece in the past. She didn’t deserve it.

  Reece waved as she left. She didn’t attempt to kiss her, and Alex was a little disappointed, though she couldn’t say why. She went off for some tea and then had a quick stroll around the garden.

  She slept well that night and was getting used to the early rising. She’d never been a morning person. However, mornings existed, particularly when she’d had a dog. They’d loved their walks on the beach, her and Jasper. Seeing the excited look on his face as he scampered along chasing a ball gave her such joy. They’d been happy together, but those times were gone. She mustn’t keep looking back. Right now, she had to focus. She took a long hot shower, and for the first time in a week, she washed her hair. She put some fresh clothes on; a pair of jeans and a pink sweatshirt. Not quite her, but she looked and felt a hundred times better than she had for a while. After breakfast she walked in the garden again and enjoyed it. That was thanks to Reece. It was a pity she hadn’t discovered it before.

  All afternoon she kept looking at the clock. Life was so monotonous, lurching from one meal to another. Other people seemed to get more involved in activities and conversation, but she’d always been a loner and preferred her own company except when she was working with her crew on property changes. And anyway, so far, she’d not seen one person she wanted to pass the time of day with.

  Visiting time arrived, and Gemma’s parents burst into her room like a tornado. They virtually threw her fruit and veg on the table, and then it was all hugs, kisses, and smothering. They couldn’t be farther from how her real mum and dad were. She’d been fairly close to her dad and had picked up a lot of his habits
and ideals, like working hard and being strictly organized, but her relationship with her mum had never been much to speak of.

  Barry burst into tears. “Baby, what have they done to you?” The woman, Lulu, joined him. Together they nearly suffocated her.

  She’d wondered if they’d be her salvation. Now she was having second thoughts.

  Eventually they settled a little. Lulu sat on the bed beside her, and Barry sat on the chair. She thought she’d better ask them how they were since they’d flown a few thousand miles to see her. “How are you both? Reece told me you live in Spain.”

  Lulu stroked Alex’s arm. “We’re fine, baby. We couldn’t believe it when she told us you’d lost your memory. Fancy not being able to remember your mum and dad. Something traumatic must have happened. Mind you, we’re surprised it didn’t happen sooner.”

  And what did that mean? Hopefully, they’d enlighten her, but there didn’t seem any point in going through the story of her real life. She doubted if she’d see them again. But they must have liked their daughter, otherwise they wouldn’t have dropped everything and flown to see her. “They think I may have banged my head at some time. I can’t remember doing it, but I wouldn’t, would I? Apparently, I’ve been depressed for quite a while too?”

  Barry folded his arms across his chest. “Well, love, you’ve always been a bit of a depressive, haven’t you?”

  “Have I?”

  He rubbed his arm and avoided looking into her eyes. “Yes, love. Since you were a kiddie. You didn’t have many friends, apart from that Tracy.” He laughed. “She was a rum ‘un. You wouldn’t need more than one of her. But you mostly shut yourself away from us…and the world. You were always a bit down and had a lot of mood swings.” He coughed. “You used to get angry too.” He looked down at the floor. “A lot,” he said quietly.

  Things seemed to be going from bad to worse. “Did I?” Did Reece know about the mood swings when they’d got together? She seemed like an intelligent woman. If she knew her background, then why would she contemplate having children with her? This Gemma woman sounded like she’d been a lot to handle for everyone around her. “Did Reece know? Before, I mean.”

  Barry cleared his throat and looked at Lulu.

  Lulu wrung her hands. “We didn’t think it would help, you know, telling Reece and all. For a while you seemed so happy, so we didn’t interfere. We hoped it would all just go away.”

  Bloody hell. It was all coming out now. Gemma had always had problems, and nobody seemed to have addressed them. She must have felt incredibly alone. “Perhaps you should have told Reece.”

  Barry shook his head. “No way. You were fine. You were coping. And really, you should never have got involved with that woman. You should have stuck with boyfriends. She charmed you and wheedled her way into your life. You were going to come with us to Spain and help us open the bar. But no, she had other ideas, taking you travelling all over the place and giving you a taste of the posh life. She took one look at you and knew you were a pushover. You were vulnerable, and I reckon you were a bit impressed by her job and such. Stuck up so and so.”

  Lulu kicked her dad on the shin. “Stop it, Barry.”

  “It’s true. You’ve said it yourself. You were fit and healthy, and she saw you as a baby machine. Good child-bearing hips, that’s what your mother said. Of course, they had to be her eggs, the superior brand.” He laughed. “What did you used to say about the eggs, Lulu?”

  Now her mum joined in the laughter. “Marks and Sparks. No bloody run of the mill Asda ones for her.”

  “After they were born, we felt excluded. We weren’t allowed to see the kids much, well not as much as her mum and dad. They were the flavour of the year.”

  Alex tried to keep her expression impassive. This was all very interesting, and she wondered how on earth Reece and Gemma had managed to stay together as long as they had. However, she’d had enough of the egg story and tried to change the subject. “How long are you here for?”

  Lulu took her hand and squeezed it. “We have to get back tomorrow.” She looked across at her husband. “But I said to Barry, didn’t I, Barry? I said if our Gemma needs her mum, then I’ll stop as long as you like.”

  Alex shook her head. They were nice enough, but a bit too much for her to handle. “No. Don’t worry. You’ve got enough on. I’ll come and see you when I’m better.”

  “Thanks, love. It is busy right now. Chris is looking after the bar for us. He’s run off his feet. You remember Chris, don’t you? Possibly not now, though. Anyway, he sends his love.” She chuckled. “He’s not married either. You’d love the bar…well, it’s a café as well. We do tapas mostly, and cake. Chris’s mum bakes the cakes fresh. She’s a real gem. And we get a lot of celebs in. Who was it the other day, Barry? Barry? Are you listening to me?”

  God. It would be hard to tune her out. Alex smiled politely.

  “Celebs? Oh yeah. It was what’s her name from made in somewhere or other.” He laughed. “You know, the one with the big…” he smirked, cupped his hands around his chest, jiggled them up and down, and laughed some more.

  Saints preserve us. No, she wouldn’t be going anywhere with them.

  Lulu put her arm around her shoulder. “When this is sorted, we’ll come and collect you and take you back to Spain. You must get a divorce. You’ll get half the house money. It’s legally half yours, you know. We could open another bar. You wouldn’t want for anything.”

  Alex wasn’t remotely tempted, and she wondered how many of Gemma’s problems had stemmed from her well-meaning but overbearing parents. Before she could give it much thought, she said, “What about the children?”

  Barry ran a hand through his hair. “A bar’s not a place for kids.”

  Lulu took her hand away from Alex’s shoulder. She sniffed. “I didn’t think you’d bonded that well?”

  “Maybe not, but I can’t just run away and leave them.”

  Barry shrugged. “We’ll talk about that another time.”

  For the next hour, they rambled on about the prospects of another bar in Malaga. They’d already decided that she and Chris should run it, and how it would be one big happy family. She seemed to have a lot of families, but none that she knew.

  Someone knocked on the door and a nurse popped her head around. “It’s nearly teatime, Gemma.”

  Saved by the bell. Alex nearly sighed out loud with relief.

  They both got up. “We’ll call you, babe.”

  She didn’t know how, because she didn’t have a phone. “Great.” She took both of their hands. “Thanks for coming. You’ve really cheered me up.” What else could she say?

  They kissed her some more and left, and Alex flopped back onto the bed, enjoying the moment of silence. They didn’t belong to her, and there was no connection. The memories of those parents didn’t exist, not even in the strange overlapping way some of the other memories did. She was left feeling like an emotionless robot. It was a sad state of affairs and one she couldn’t change. But she had learned a lot. She began to piece together a profile on Gemma. She sounded like a sad, desperate person. At least Alex could take comfort that she wasn’t that person, no matter what anyone else thought.

  After dinner she went back to her room. She sat at her table and ate an apple, and then a banana. A plan began to form in her mind. Being in here wasn’t going to help anything so she needed to find a different avenue. She flipped to the back of her notebook and wrote a letter to Reece. She ripped the page out and folded it in half. Next time she visited she’d pass it to her. This was her last chance.

  ***

  Reece returned from her seminar at the end of the week. Her dad was right. Although it was work, it had taken her mind off some of her problems. And then there’d been that woman, Marianne. She was a qualified dentist, and she wanted to further her career by specialising in implants. She hadn’t hidden her attraction to Reece and had come on strong one evening. She’d forgotten how to flirt. It had been so long, and she wa
s totally out of practice. As for real sex, she daren’t hazard a guess when that last occurred. Her toys had taken a hammering though. As for Marianne, she lived in Brighton and had given Reece her card. No, she wouldn’t be telling her mum and dad. They’d be inviting her over even though she was still married. However, the experience had lifted her spirits, and it was good to know she still had some appeal.

  She pulled her head and shoulders straight. Back to reality. She looked at her watch. If she got her skates on, she’d make it for a quick visit to Gemma. She wouldn’t be going at the weekend. She’d missed the children so much and wanted to spend some time with them.

  When she arrived, she went straight to Gemma’s room to find it empty. She saw one of the nurses who told her she was in the “quiet room.” After some directions, she opened the door slowly and peeked in. It was a small room, and there were a few people scattered around either reading or staring into space. Gemma had her foot tucked underneath her body and seemed engrossed in whatever she was reading. Gemma never sat like that. She was never engrossed in anything either. They were only little things, but when added up with all the other quirks of character, it seemed odd. When she saw her, she closed her Kindle, and got up. “Shall we go back to my room?”

  Reece nodded, and they walked along the corridor in silence. She took her usual seat on the bed, and Reece took the chair. She looked better than usual. A little more colour in her cheeks, and she even looked like she may have put on a pound or two.

  “Thanks for all the fruit and stuff.”

  “Please, Gemma, anything you want, just tell me. Anyway, how was the visit with your mum and dad? They seemed so happy to see you when I ran them back to the hotel.”

  Gemma laughed. “Oh, you mean Barry and Lulu?”

  “Yes. Your mum and dad.”

  Gemma opened her palms out. “Believe me, we’re not related. They seem like nice enough people. And before you ask, I have no intention of going to Spain with them.”