"Yes."
"Why?" I frowned, studying her intently. This didn't make any sense to me, and the fact I'd managed to successfully get what I wanted was even more confusing.
"I have my reasons."
"And you're not going to tell me what they are?" I narrowed my eyes. This wasn't the Katya I remembered. She was harder. Colder. More determined than before. I didn't like not being able to see any remnant of the friend I once knew. It tarred the memories we shared.
She laughed loudly. "Absolutely not."
"It was worth a try." I tried to sound nonchalant, but I didn't think it worked. She'd always been able to see right through me.
"It was." She stepped forward, but didn't bother raising her sword.
Didn't she see me as a threat? I had to admit that a small part of me was still cowed. She was imposing and regal, almost like she fit in the role of queen even if it wasn't really hers. I lifted my own blade, pointing it at her. "Stay back."
The look on her face said it all. She knew my strength was with a bow and arrow, and there was no point denying it. My sword could do very little damage to her. I should make a point to do some more sparring when I got back to camp.
"I'm not going to hurt you," she said.
"Why should I believe you? You've done nothing but hurt my family." That was the part that stung the most. For all I cared, she could have the kingdom if it would have taken away my family's pain. I suspected it was far too late for that.
"That's not true."
"I think we have an interesting definition of not harming anyone. You took my brother away from his true love." Poor Killian had been heartbroken when he realised he couldn't have the person he really wanted. I'd blamed myself for pushing Katya at him.
"You mean Lady Grace?" She seemed genuinely shocked, which was something, even if I wasn't completely certain of the reason why.
"Who else would I mean?"
"You really didn't know, did you?"
"Know what? That you were just using him?" How could she ask me this?
"Of course not. I never used Killian. He knew how I felt about him, and I knew how he felt about me. Lady Grace was your father's choice, not his."
I tried not to look on in shock, but it was impossible not to be confused by what she was saying. Killian hadn't been in love with Lady Grace? But he'd even told me he was at one point.
"He was in love with Lord Hubert. He had been for several years. When he asked me to marry him, he did it so that he could carry on his affair once we were married."
I stepped backwards, not because she was threatening me again, but because I couldn't make sense of what she was saying. "No, that's not true."
"I'm sorry, it is. Killian barely touched me. We had an agreement in place hoping that we'd get an heir, naturally, but that didn't change where he went when he needed love. It was Lord Hubert he went to on his coronation night."
"Which was why I found you in the stables," I said, thinking back to their coronation and how I'd found her grooming one of the horses instead of celebrating.
"It was the one place I felt like I could truly be myself, she admitted, seeming oddly vulnerable in that moment.
"Are you really going to let me out of here?" I asked, desperate to escape the conversation we were having.
"The time for one of us to kill the other isn't here yet."
There wasn't as much threat in her voice as I had expected, but that didn't mean I wasn't feeling it deep inside. She disappeared moments later, as if she didn't think I was worth the time to worry about. I supposed in some ways she was right. I had what I'd come here for, and I didn't intend to harm anyone while I was here.
Now I just had to get out of here with my life. And make use of the crown I'd just stolen. That might prove to be the trickiest part of the whole plan.
Chapter Nine
I slept through most of the next day, exhausted from sneaking in and out of the palace. I hadn't intended for it to take so much of a toll on me, but I wasn't surprised. My adrenaline had been high for the entire day, and there'd been the confrontation with Katya to contend with. Which was still confusing me. Why had she done that? She could have called her guards and had me confined to the dungeons. There was no chance of me running a rebellion from there.
Yet another thing about Katya that didn't make sense.
I got out of my bed and grabbed one of my simple dresses from the trunk. I'd been avoiding anything with a corset in order to avoid a repeat of that day. The last thing I wanted was to end up passed out on the floor and unable to move again. It had taken me a few days to recover, and we couldn't afford that.
I turned to the stand which held a medium-sized mirror, and more importantly, the box holding the crown. It wasn't a fancy thing, just some beaten metal that one of my ancestors had forged in the middle of a battle, if the legends of our people were to be believed.
I picked it up, the circlet becoming heavy in my hands. I wanted to try it on, to see how it sat on my head, but a little part of me was too scared of what would happen if I did that. Perhaps I wouldn't feel like I deserved to rule.
"Pull yourself together, Lucia," I chided myself.
Taking advantage of the privacy, I faced the mirror and took a deep breath and gently set the circlet down on my brow.
Oh.
I didn't feel like I wasn't worthy at all. Far from it. This felt right, it looked right. With the crown on my head, I finally felt like the queen I needed to be. Perhaps I should start wearing the circlet around the camp to truly remind people of who and what they were fighting for. I was going to be the queen they needed, even if I still had to learn exactly how I was going to achieve that.
"Lucia, are you in there?" Jonathan called.
"Yes, come in," I said before realising I wasn't sure if I wanted him to see me wearing the circlet or not.
The sound of canvas opening drew my attention. I turned to look at him.
His eyes widened as he took me in. "Now you look like a queen."
I scoffed. "In a day dress that's seen better days, I don't think so," I retorted.
He shook his head. "I've been around royalty my entire life. Clothing isn't what makes someone royal," he reminded me. "It's more than that. The posture, the bearing. That's what makes a queen."
"All I did was put this one." I gestured to the circlet sitting against my brow. It felt heavier than I knew it was, and I wondered if that was because of the responsibility it came with.
"Sometimes, that's all it takes." He withdrew his sword and knelt down, pressing it into the ground in front of me. "I swear my sword and my allegiance to you, Queen Lucia." He bowed his head.
I gulped hard. I knew this was how knights and other nobles pledged their support to a king or queen, and yet it took me by surprise. There was yet more weight added to the title I'd been born to.
"You can do this, Lucia," he whispered.
"Thank you." I choked out the words, trying not to let the emotions get to me.
He rose slowly. "Perhaps we should have a fealty ceremony? So the nobles can swear allegiance," he suggested.
I stepped back. "I'm not sure I'm capable of doing that," I admitted.
"I think you are," he countered. "But it isn't something you should do if you're not ready. But then, if you're not, why did you go and get the crown?"
"I'm not sure. It just felt like the right thing to do. Don't you get that?"
"I do. Swearing my fealty to you then was just like that. I didn't come in here this morning to do that, but I felt the need in that moment."
"Do you regret it?" That was my worry about the whole idea of the ceremony.
"Of course not. You're the rightful queen of these people, and you'll make a fair and just queen. I know you'll do a great job at ruling them. And if they're not convinced of that, then you can win them around."
I barked out a laugh. "I think you overestimate how good I am at making people like me. Katya was always the one who made people like us, I
was just a vain and frivolous princess." I threw my hands up in frustration.
"It doesn't matter what you were, Lucia. You're not a vain and frivolous princess now. You're a leader. And a brave one at that. You lead the people with a determination that I haven't seen from many people in my life. And if you don't think you can win people over, then how did you win me over?"
I smirked at that. "Are you trying to tell me that you didn't like me when we met?"
"You were a little abrasive."
"So were you," I pointed out. "You assumed I was a serving girl."
"I'm sorry about that. You weren't the only who was vain and frivolous at one point in their lives. I should have known that you weren't like other princesses, and that was an error on my part."
"Apology accepted. I'm sorry I didn't give you more of a chance."
The canvas rustled again, and Sapphire swooped in. But instead of landing on the edge of my cot like she'd been doing the last few weeks, she settled herself on Jonathan's shoulders.
"It seems she likes you," I said, not in the slightest bit surprised. I might have formed a bond with Sapphire, but she still liked other people.
"She should, she probably realises I'm the one that saved her from the palace," he quipped.
"As you should have. Isn't it the noble quest of all princes to save damsels trapped by an Evil Queen?" The side of my lips twisted up into a smile as I teased and flirted with him.
"Exactly, I must always fulfil my princely duty. Sapphire is a worthy prize to have won." He winked at me as he ruffled her feathers. She pushed her head into his hand, clearly showcasing the affection she felt for him.
I'd never seen my hawk be quite this affectionate with someone other than me.
I sighed loudly. "We need to go face the day. But I'll think about the idea of a fealty ceremony."
"I think it might help avoid more potential rogue dukes," he suggested.
"Don't remind me. I've sent several letters to Travers now and he still hasn't replied to me. I don't know if he's ignoring me, or if Katya is blocking his letters."
"Wouldn't she have done something about it if she had?"
I mused on that for a moment. Wouldn't she have lorded something like that over me while we were in the treasury last night? But no. She seemed more focused on destroying the memories I had of my brother. A small part of me hated her for that, but only because I could see how they were true.
"I don't know, our spies haven't been revealing anything of use recently. I'm not sure if there's something stopping them from giving us their reports, or if there's genuinely nothing going on in the palace."
"That doesn't seem to make any sense. Not with all the nobles in the palace and the ball coming up," he said after a moment.
"Exactly. Something isn't right, but I suppose we'll see what happens." I lifted the circlet from my head and set it back in the box it had been in before. It was time to get on with the rest of the day and everything that needed doing. We didn't have time for me to question my position as queen.
Chapter Ten
Light streamed through the trees of the forest and the birds sang, none of them seemed all that bothered by the two of us walking through the forest, even if Sapphire was sitting on my arm.
"I'm glad you could get away from queenly duties for an afternoon," Jonathan said, breaking the silence between us.
I snorted. "I'd say it was more running away than getting away."
"Even so, I'm glad you did."
"We'll have to take back some rabbits or something to make it up to them," I supplied.
"Are rabbits really all you want to try for?" he joked.
"I don't want to carry anything heavier," I supplied. "But rabbits, I can make you carry."
He chuckled.
The urge to reach out and take his hand was more intense than I wanted to admit. I pushed the thought aside, knowing it wasn't wise to let myself act on it. I didn't want to confuse matters between us.
"There's one up ahead," he whispered.
"I got it." I slipped my bow from my shoulders and notching an arrow. I lined it up with the rabbit he'd spotted.
A second later, the arrow pinned it to the ground.
"I shan't doubt you again," Jonathan quipped.
"I'm glad to hear it."
He pulled the arrow from the rabbit and cleaned it on a patch of grass, before handing it back to me and tying the rabbit to his belt. We'd need a few more for them to make any dent in feeding all the people back at camp, but at least it was something.
We continued walking, enjoying the day.
"Where are we going again?" he asked.
"There's a well up ahead. It's beautiful and abandoned. It's where I've been escaping to ever since I came to the cabin." I almost couldn't believe that I was going to share it with him, but it felt right to.
"I can't wait to see it. Is the water drinkable?"
I shook my head. "It's been dried up for a long time as far as I can tell. I think that's why it's abandoned." I wasn't completely sure about that, but it was as good a guess as any. There had to be some reason that people aren't using it anymore.
We reached the well half an hour later.
"It's beautiful," he admitted, looking into the small clearing. When people had stopped coming here, the local plant life had come in, filling the ground with all kinds of foliage, and the insects buzzing around that were to be expected from them being there.
"And peaceful," I added. "It's just the place for a picnic." I dropped the basket I'd been carrying to the ground.
"How did you manage to scrounge up a picnic from the middle of an army camp?" His bemusement came through the question.
Even so, he took off his cape and laid it on the ground, gesturing for me to take a seat on it.
"Oh, I didn't. It's only our lunch rations packed into a basket." I wouldn't have wanted to take anything that wasn't due to us, even though I knew that anyone would give us it if I asked. Which was one of the many reasons I hadn't asked or shared my plans with anyone. Other than telling them I was leaving camp and was taking Jonathan with me as a guard. The last thing I wanted was to cause panic by disappearing.
I pulled the bread, cheese, and dried meat out of the basket. It wasn't that far off what I'd have packed for a picnic anyway, which didn't make this too bad. I'd even managed to pack a bottle of weak ale.
"This is lovely," Jonathan said, sitting down beside me.
"It is. Thank you for coming with me. I needed some time away."
"I know what you mean. It's exhausting to have so many people around all the time."
"Especially when most of them are looking at you with the expectation that you'll be doing something. If I have to answer someone asking me what the plan is one more time, I might explode. I don't know why people haven't realised that I don't have one at all."
"I guess that's what we're supposed to be as royalty though. People who have all the answers, especially in times of trouble like these."
I sighed loudly. "I wish you weren't right."
He chuckled. "But that doesn't mean all of our time is owed to those people. We need to take moments like these and take time for ourselves, especially when they're with people we enjoy spending time with."
"If I didn't know better, I'd say you were flirting with me," I teased.
"Perhaps I am. Though it'd be highly improper for the two of us to be spending time together alone like this. We'll be in trouble if anyone catches us." He wiggled his eyebrows.
I laughed freely, only then noticing how close the two of us were, and how often my attention was being drawn to his lips.
"Perhaps we should give them something to be truly scandalised by," I murmured.
"Oh?" He raised his eyebrows. "What did you have in mind?"
"Why don't I show you?" I licked my lips, unsure about how he was going to respond when I tried this.
He leaned in. "I think I'd like that."
I reached out and cupped his cheek
in my hand. I drew his face to mine and pressed my lips against his.
His hand threaded into my hair as he kissed me back, and I melted into him. I'd never have believed that I'd be doing this when he'd turned up at camp that first night, but now it felt right. He'd been there for me so much in the past few weeks, never pressuring me to be more than I was ready to be, and supporting me into becoming the queen I was supposed to be.
We broke apart, each of us dazed by the intensity of our kiss.
"That wasn't what I expected when you invited me on a picnic," he whispered.
"What did you?" I frowned. Normally when a woman said she wanted to spend time with a man privately, there was a good reason for it.
"Honestly? I figured you wanted some alone time and you'd ask me to stay back while you sat and ate."
"Huh, I suppose that would have made sense, yes. But that wasn't my plan."
Jonathan grinned. "For what it's worth, I like this plan better than the one I came up with.
"Good." I leaned in to kiss him again, excitement spreading through me at the thought of Jonathan returning my budding feelings.
Chapter Eleven
I'd been almost skipping around the camp ever since Jonathan and I had returned from our picnic. We knew we had to be discreet while in camp for fear of anyone getting any ideas, but that didn't change the truth about what had happened.
I brushed my fingers against my lips where they still tingled from his touch, even if we hadn't kissed for hours now. Sapphire bristled on my shoulder, warning me of someone's approach. I was glad for her attentiveness as apparently I was now living in a world of my own and couldn't be trusted to keep an eye on the things I was supposed to.
"Is everything alright, Your Highness?" Hannah asked.
She was still gaunt from her time spent in questioning. It hadn't even been that long, but it seemed to have affected her greatly. I'd gotten her released as soon as I'd risen from bed, but she'd only just returned to her duties as my maid after requesting some time off to spend with her family.
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