Temporary Dad

by Laura Marie Altom

  Jed laughed. “How so?”

  “Well…”

  She licked her lips, and it no longer mattered that she’d annoyed the hell out of him only minutes earlier.

  The sun was setting in a fiery blaze across the western sky, and Jed was sick of fighting. What he really wanted was another kiss. His brief taste back at the beer-can cow hadn’t been enough—not nearly enough.

  “Maybe,” she said cautiously, “you could try letting your guard down around me. I mean, since we’re getting to know each other, you could practice trusting me the way I trust you.”

  “You trust me?”

  “Duh. If I didn’t, do you think I’d have left my home to come all this way with you?”

  The sun streaked the sky with orange, yellow and violet. Pretty as that sunset was, it didn’t hold a candle to the warm glow in Annie’s eyes. The faint aroma of her floral perfume rose above the weary scent of baked earth.

  Cupping Richard’s head, Jed said, “You mean that, don’t you?” He didn’t meet Annie’s probing gaze.

  “I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t.”

  “Okay, but why do you trust me? I’m a train wreck. Start to finish, I’ve bungled this entire mission. How can you feel anything for me but disgust?”

  “This mission is nowhere near finished. And second, if you think you’ve bungled caring for the babies—remember that I’ve had years of training and experience. You’ve had a few days of sporadic babysitting. Give yourself a break, Jed. You can’t expect to be an expert at everything.”

  Her words made sense.

  His feelings didn’t.

  After his parents died—and even before that, when his little brother died—Jed had to be everything to everyone in some ludicrous attempt to make up for Ronnie’s death.

  He always had to be in control, because if he wasn’t, he might lose something else. Someone else.

  He had to save every helpless person from every fire.

  He had to save his niece and nephews from their mother’s refusal to grow up.

  He had to do all of this, but suddenly, he no longer knew how. He was afraid, confused and overwhelmed. He’d been on his own for so long, and honestly, he was tired. Tired of always being in control. Of being the parent. Of never allowing himself to have fun.

  The sun had set, and all that remained of the show was a faint orange glow.

  Straightening his shoulders, he said to Annie, “We’d better get back on the road. Hand me the keys.”

  He’d be tired later.

  Right now, he had to find his sister.

  Chapter Seven

  “Mmm…where are we?” Annie asked, rubbing her eyes, then stretching. Except for a yellow glow spilling in from a lone parking-lot light, the van was dark, chilly and brimming with the achingly sweet scents of babies and Jed.

  “The Fill’er Up and Go station at mile marker four-seventeen. We need gas. This place opens at six.”

  The glowing green numbers on the dashboard clock read 2:37 a.m. “Oh.”

  “I’d keep driving, but the empty light came on a few miles back. There’s an awful lot of nothing out here. I don’t want to spend the next week walking if we run out of gas.”

  “Makes sense,” she said through a yawn.

  “Why don’t you go back to sleep?” he said. “I’ve got this covered.”

  “Why don’t we both sleep?”

  “You go ahead. I don’t want to risk snoozing through this place opening.”

  Annie snorted.

  Even though she could’ve slept until Christmas, she said through another yawn, “I’m not all that tired, either.”

  “Isn’t it a sin for preschool teachers to lie?”

  She shrugged.

  How could it be a sin to lie when that wicked-handsome smirk of his left her wide-awake and humming with awareness of how cramped the van was. And how all she’d have to do to once again be in his arms was lean a little to the left.

  “You hungry?” Jed asked.

  Loaded question. “Uh-huh. How about a ham-and-cheese omelet with hash browns and a side of pancakes?” Annie said.

  “Mmm. I like your taste in breakfast.”

  “How far are we from Denver?”

  “Three or four hours, give or take a few depending on how long the critters in back decide to sleep.”

  “It’s pretty miraculous that they let us go this far without stopping.”

  “You don’t think they’re sick, do you?”

  Annie sighed. “What I think is that they’ve finally worn themselves out from all the screaming they’ve done today.”

  “Don’t you mean yesterday?”

  Annie stuck out her tongue.

  “Go back to sleep,” he said. “I’ll handle this.”

  “Why don’t you let me?”

  “Let you what?”

  “Stay up. I’ll make sure we’re awake when the gas station opens.”

  “Haven’t we already been over this?”

  “Yes, but since I don’t have a clue where your cabin is, you need to be alert to drive in the mountains. Therefore, it makes the most sense for you to sleep now, and me later.”

  “Yeah, but—”

  “If you agree that I’ve made an excellent point, does that mean you actually relinquish a bit of your almighty control?”

  He rubbed his whisker-stubbled jaw. “I didn’t say that.”

  “True, but I dare you to deny that’s what you felt.”

  “Why did I ever open the door that first day you showed up at my condo?”

  “Hmm…” Annie beamed. “Could it be because you needed me?”

  “You promise to wake me the second this place opens?”

  Annie gave him the same look she would’ve given one of her preschool students hell-bent on licking the fingerpaints.

  He closed his eyes. “See you in a few hours.”

  “JED?”

  Annie shook him gently.

  “Jed, you need to wake up. The station owner just turned on the pumps.”

  He slowly came round to find himself staring at a vision way better than that omelet he’d been craving earlier. How’d the woman manage to look so good wearing nothing on her face but a sweet smile?

  “What time is it?” he asked.

  “Six-thirty. The owner got a late start. He said he was up all night with his dachshund, Cocoa. She had three puppies.”

  “Oh.” He straightened behind the wheel, then looked over his shoulders. The babies were gone. “Where—”

  “Outside, they started fussing a little after five, so I got them out and walked them around.”

  “Why didn’t you wake me? That could’ve been dangerous.”

  “What?”

  “Walking around in the dark.”

  “What was going to get us? Other than that pack of yipping coyotes that finally knocked it off, there’s not a whole lot to worry about out here.”

  “Yeah, well…” He opened his door and stuck his foot out. “You just should’ve woken me, that’s all.”

  Annie jogged around to Jed’s side of the van.

  The babies were in their stroller, parked ten feet away on the store’s covered porch. All three were drinking from their bottles.

  “Face it,” she said. “You can’t stand the fact that we all survived the night without your help.”

  “That’s crazy talk.” Jed slipped his hand under his T-shirt and scratched his stomach. “I knew all along you’d be fine.” Right. Which was why he’d faked sleep until accidentally falling into the real thing.

  He had to get to his family cabin immediately. He couldn’t let Annie get some softhearted notion that he needed a few more hours of sleep. He couldn’t believe he’d gone and messed things up yet again by actually falling asleep. But Annie had done just as he’d asked and woken him when the gas pumps were turned on.

  Only hours earlier, he’d wished for someone to lean on and here he’d found that person in the petite and perfect form of Mis
s Annie Harnesberry.

  What else could he lean on her for?

  Did he have the courage to try?

  “Well?” she said, hands on her hips. “I’m waiting.”

  “For what?”

  She coughed. “Your apology?”

  Man, she looked good. The soft morning sun back-lit her curls. Her eyes and skin glowed not from makeup, but from good health.

  Just following his gut instinct without weighing the outcome of his actions, Jed pulled Annie in for a good-morning kiss. Looking at her and at his contented niece and nephews, it was suddenly a good morning.

  They were safe, and in a matter of hours, he’d know his sister was safe.

  At that point, he’d work on saving himself.

  How?

  By opening himself up to let Annie Harnesberry in.

  “HEY, ANNIE?” This time Jed was shaking her awake.

  She opened her eyes slowly and stretched. Her breasts strained against the thin cotton of her white corncob T-shirt. “Hi,” she said with a lazy smile that tugged on his stomach and regions below.

  “Hi.” He smiled back. “We’re in Denver. Still hungry for that omelet?”

  She nodded. “Babies okay?”

  “Freshly diapered and probably ready for their next meal. I got the formula can open, but I can never get the plastic liners to fit or fill them without making a mess. Would you mind doing that part?”

  “Not at all.” In fact, Annie was flattered he’d asked.

  She made the bottles and the five of them walked toward the IHOP just off Interstate 70 that would take them into the mountains.

  Pushing the stroller, Annie hung back while Jed opened the door, then ushered her inside with his hand warmly, solidly, on the small of her back.

  The restaurant smelled heavenly—of sweet syrup, bacon and spicy sausage. Her stomach growled.

  “How many?” the hostess asked.

  “Five,” Jed said.

  “Will you be needing high chairs?”

  He looked to Annie.

  “No, thank you,” Annie said.

  The hostess grabbed two menus and showed them to a large corner booth well away from the other diners.

  Once she’d taken their drink orders and left, Jed said, “Think she’s afraid of us dive-bombing her potential tips?”

  Grinning, Annie said, “Maybe. But I like it better over here anyway.” She doled out the bottles to the babies and tried to ignore the little voice that told her just how perfect this whole morning felt.

  Jed’s handsome face had been her first official sight of the day, and it was a good way to start. Something about the vibe between them now, about the way they seemed to be operating not as Jed and Annie, but as a team—a couple—felt right.

  Not once had she felt like this with Troy or Conner. After what they’d put her through, she’d been afraid she’d never truly feel at ease with another man.

  But here she was. Allowing Jed’s smile to launch a whole new batch of cautious hopes. It wasn’t fair of her to constantly urge him to share his woes when she hadn’t opened up to him, either. But somehow she couldn’t do it.

  Not yet.

  But soon.

  Jed unfolded his napkin, used it to wipe the dribble from Ronnie’s chin. “They must’ve been hungry.”

  “Has your sister introduced them to solid foods?”

  Reddening, Jed feigned deep interest in a packet of sugar.

  “Okay, mister. Spill it. What have you fed these guys that you weren’t supposed to?”

  “Nothing too exciting. Just a little ice cream at the zoo.”

  “And…”

  “Maybe a few French fries.”

  “French fries? Jed! They could’ve choked!”

  “I was right there. I mashed them with my fingers. I’m not letting anyone choke on my watch.”

  “That’s it?”

  “I, um, gave them a bit of a milkshake on the way home from the zoo. I just put a little in their bottles. And they had some licks of a dill pickle. I love ’em. I was curious if they would, too.”

  “No wonder they were fussy when I first showed up. Their stomachs probably hurt.”

  “From a few bites of people food?”

  “You have to introduce solids into an infant’s diet very slowly. You can’t just start feeding them junk food.”

  “Yeah, well, I say that’s how it should be done.”

  The waitress returned with two iced teas, then took their order for omelets and link sausage. They decided to share an order of pancakes.

  The second after the food arrived, Pia and Richard got fussy.

  Annie started to tend to them, but Jed said, “You go ahead and eat. I’m used to eating my food cold down at the station.”

  “You sure you don’t mind?”

  “Do I look like I mind?” he asked, a baby on each knee. He made goofy faces at both.

  Pia giggled.

  When Annie had been with Conner, he’d never once offered to let her eat while he took care of Sarah. She’d been the one to calm the baby, cut Clara’s meat or make sure Ben used his napkin.

  Looking back, Conner and Annie hadn’t operated as a team at all. But considering how things had ended between them, was that really a surprise?

  “Why so quiet?” Jed asked, bouncing the smiling duo on his knees.

  “Just thinking.”

  “Oh, no. As much as you’ve made me spill my guts lately, don’t think I’m letting you off that easy.”

  Annie fiddled with the syrup dispenser. “I was just comparing you to a guy I used to date—not that I think we’re dating or anything.”

  “Sure.”

  “It’s just that…” Suddenly, she couldn’t seem to focus on anything but Jed’s lips. On how tenderly he kissed. “He turned out not to be a very nice guy. And you…”

  “Happen to be very nice?” His wide, welcoming smile warmed her inside and out.

  “Yes,” she said. “You’re very nice, and probably very hungry. Here—” she held out her arms “—why don’t you let me take those two.”

  “But you’re not done.”

  Thinking of Conner had stolen her appetite. “Really,” she said. “I’m full. You eat now. Then we’ll get back on the road.”

  “Okay.” He awkwardly stood to hand the babies off to Annie. In the exchange, his strong, warm fingers inadvertently brushed the sides of her breasts. The warmth of his breathy laugh, combined with the heat and goodness of the babies, confused her further.

  She loved nothing more than infants.

  What she couldn’t do was mistake that love for her growing attraction to Jed. She wasn’t interested in anything but her work and redecorating her condo. She didn’t have room in her life—let alone, her aching heart—for another man.

  It just wasn’t time.

  She hadn’t had enough space to heal.

  Jed kissed Pia on the top of her head, then Ronnie on top of his. He looked into Annie’s eyes. Deeply. Thoroughly. Hungrily. No matter how hard she tried not to respond to his message, it was in plain view for all the world to see.

  I like you, Annie Harnesberry.

  Do you like me, too?

  Without a word, he leaned forward and gently pressed his lips to hers.

  “You taste sweet,” he said. “Like blueberry syrup.”

  Terrified of what she might find next in his golden-brown eyes, she looked down.

  “Now what’s the matter?” he asked. “Didn’t you want me to do that?”

  She shook her head, then nodded. “I—I don’t know.”

  Maybe the problem was that she’d very much wanted him to do that. Despite knowing she had no business letting him this close.

  And not just physically close.

  A few kisses she could handle.

  Maybe.

  But emotionally?

  Inside, she felt like melted cheese. Ooey and gooey and incapable of doing anything but molding herself to him. Was she attracted to him or to her i
dyllic picture of him? Was it the total package? The image of him as a loving father to three children? A loving partner to her?

  The reality was that they were strangers.

  She knew nothing about him.

  He knew nothing about her.

  So how come all she wanted to do was learn everything? She wanted to know him fully, spiritually, intimately. The way only a wife could.

  “Annie?” He began to kiss her again, but she backed away. “Did I offend you?” he asked. “If I did, I’m sorry. I never meant to—”

  “Please,” she said, wanting to put her hand on his arm but struggling to restrain herself. “This kiss—all of them—have been nice. Better than nice. It’s just that maybe we ought to present a platonic front for the babies.”

  Jed raised his eyebrows. “They’re old enough to know about kissing?”

  “No, but—” Both babies tucked close, she sat down. “Go ahead and eat. You don’t want your omelet getting any colder.”

  He took a bite. “I ticked you off, didn’t I? I knew it.”

  “Knew what?”

  “I came on too strong. You’re probably right about us keeping it cool in front of the kids. But to give you fair warning—as soon as we pick up that no-good sister of mine, be prepared for some serious wooing.”

  AS THE MINIVAN GOBBLED the miles to Jed’s cabin, Annie tried to sleep, but how could she with a loaded word like wooing between them?

  Although she should’ve told Jed right then and there that she wasn’t interested in dating anyone right now, she hadn’t been able to get the words out of her mouth.

  No, she wasn’t interested in casual dating, but wooing?

  That was an entirely different issue.

  The old-fashioned word implied holding hands on long walks through Pecan’s many parks. Rowboat rides at the city lake and bouquets of pink cabbage roses. Late-night phone conversations. Sharing popcorn at the movies…

  “Just a couple more hours,” Jed said, startling Annie from her daydream of what would happen after the movies.

  She blushed. “Un-until what?”

  He flashed her a funny look. “Are you okay?”