by Kris Buendía
“We can fix that, I`m feeling lonely too right now.”
The tone of his voice changes to an unusual mischief. It makes me laugh and so does he. I didn't know that listening to him over the phone would be so nice and normal.
I like it.
“I can imagine Duncan.”
“How was your surgery this morning? I didn't know what time to call you so I tried my luck.”
For him to think it over so much and to be interested in my work is something I really like. I`m starting to believe that he can truly give me what I need, if only I knew what it was and what he wanted, this could work, but I need to take baby steps in this.
“The surgery was good. The patient is recovering and so am I. I'm exhausted and I still have a lot to do. Again the emergency room is short staffed and I have to make my rounds. But I won't bore you with my work, tell me, how is your day going?”
“Don`t even think that you can bore me talking about your job, Lana” again that voice full of self “assurance that makes me believe him” My day is going as usual. If I tell you about it I will bore you for sure.”
“I like what you do. Your job is not like mine. Nobody is placing a life in your hands, for sure it's not a work of art and the result may be devastating.”
A brief silence tells me he knows I'm right. I love what I do, and he loves what he does. I`d like to think we are not so different in that regards.
“You are right. Their different but they have something in common: trust, they don`t put a life in my hands, but they trust in me. We save lives in different ways, yours is in health, mine in business were millions of people depend on. I`ve had tough days were I`m not sure if I`ll be able to fulfil the contract. You, babe, are admirable.”
Holy cow. What kind of subject is this to be talking on the phone? I am for sure not, and I'm lying to my father and creating a story that only lives in my head.
“Lana?”
“I`m sorry” I wipe a tear from my cheek “I got distracted for a minute.”
“I hope it was because you are thinking of me” he says incitingly.
“You don’t know how much.”
Shit. I said out loud. His laughter doesn`t help and I`m ashamed the second it comes out of my mouth for feeding his ego.
“I want it to be midnight already and be able to see you. So you can tell me how much you`ve been thinking about me.”
“Seriously, you don't have to come and pick me up. I can ask one of the guys to drop me home, it's no problem for them.”
“Lana, you didn`t understand me. I wasn't asking you. I will go and pick you up, and you better be there when I come.”
“Or what? “ I amaze myself for having the courage to dare him when I know for a fact he won't give up.
“Lana, you don't want to provoke me baby. Do what I say. Now I have to go. Take care. I`ll see you in a few hours.”
I don`t answer.
He is crazy if he thinks that this will turn into that. His audacious behavior is something I saw coming, but his irrationality makes my insolence come afloat.
“Lana” he calls me and I remain silent “That's ok, don't speak. It's better when you scream it.”
As I`m about to protest what he said me hangs up and leaves me with the words in my mouth. I deny it to myself and it's kind of funny. There is still much to do but I just want to go home, even if I have to get there with him.
CHAPTER
FIFTEEN
My shift is over for the day.
“Do you want me to take you home?”
Luckily Dixon has had the same shift as me. I haven't told my friends about what happened with Duncan yet. I can already hear their applause and how proud they are of me for giving myself the chance to know somebody and to enjoy the moment.
I think I`ve had enough of that.
Moments.
What I need now is to live. Without complications and Duncan seems to have that kind of sign in his forehead.
“There is no need to. Somebody is picking me up.
My friend is suspicious and smiles.”
“Is it who I think it is?”
“Yes. He offered to pick me up this morning as a gentleman thing I guess.”
“A man picking a woman from work at this time only means one or two things” My quiet curiosity makes him go on” he cares for you and wants thank you sex.
I roll my eyes and Dixon mocks me, laughing his ass off and I try to contain myself so he doesn't see me blush. The fact that Duncan cares for me, could be what is confusing he's irrational and controlling behavior, and well, about the sex, that is not going to happen again.
“Bye, Dixon” I say goodbye to my friend before he traps me.
“Sooner or later you are going to tell me Lana.”
I know. But at least today, I want to assimilate it.
Dixon says goodbye and I stay behind waiting for Duncan, I hope he is not late. I finish tidying up my desk and I put away some patient’s files when I see the door opening behind me and I think its Dixon.
“Did you forget something honey? “ I say without looking back.
“Who the hell is Dixon and why are you calling him “honey”?”
Shit.
I turn around as soon as I recognize that voice.
“What are you doing here Gabe?”
All of a sudden I feel disgust when I see him, and it's not because I was with another man while still being married to him. It's because of the way he looks at me, I don't like it. I have never seen him like that. Scruffy and with a lost gaze.
The smell of alcohol is a bad sign, because when Gabe Miller gets drunk nothing good can come out of it.
“Don`t talk back at me Lana.
He is having a hard time standing up and I take a few steps back, not letting him get any closer to me.
“What are you doing here Gabe?“ I repeat my question “You are in no position of asking me question you already know the answer to.”
He is so drunk that he forgot that Dixon is one of my best friends. He knows him, but in his insecurity and chauvinism he can't think straight on top of the alcohol in his system.
“I won't...ask you again” He mumbles, talking his hands to his belt and fidgeting to try and take it out and do what God knows.
“Gabe. Don`t do anything stupid, you are in a hospital and you know you are going to lose.”
He laughs.
“I’m going to lose? “He tumbles “I can buy this hospital, tear it down and build a public shithouse. I can do whatever the fuck I want and that includes you because you are my wife.”
The refined and classy man vanishes as soon as the alcohol appears. It's typical of Gabe, threatening, saying load of bullshit but not having the courage to do anything about it.
“I`m calling security” I grab the phone and press the extension for the security department. Gabe doesn`t stop me, he just stands there, looking at me from head to toe like he is trying to get inside my mind and know what I'm thinking. I find myself doing the same, because I want to know why he did what he did and why he is not leaving me alone so I can forget him, forgive him and move on with my life as he surely did as soon as I left our house.
“Is there a problem, Dr. Miller?“ I hate that they keep calling me that, but surely the news haven’t arrived to the security department still.
“I need you to escort a man to the exit please” I answer without taking my eyes off of Gabe.
“Right away.”
I hung up and look at the watch. It is already midnight and Duncan will be here any second to pick me up. Precisely tonight Gabe appears, precisely tonight that I was determining if I was going to go after what I want.
And what I want has a name and last name.
Duncan Ford.
But when I see Gabe, it reminds me that I was cheated on, and that I could also me cheated by Duncan. Fucking hell! I have never been a
n insecure woman, fucking Gabe and his deceit. He`s fucked me enough so as to doubt everybody, even my own judgement.
The door opens and two security guards appear, they look at Gabe and then me.
“Are you ok Dra. Miller? “One of them asks me.
Gabe is the first one to laugh.
“You are still a Miller, can't you see? You belong to me.”
I hate him
“I`m fine” I`m forced to stop looking at him” Mr. Miller was just leaving.
“Senator, please come with us.”
As they try to touch him, Gabe reacts violently and refuses to leave.
“I’m going to kill all of you if you put a hand on me!”
His threats leave me perplexed, but when I see Duncan appear behind him something inside me starts to break.
I take my things and look at Duncan. The last thing I need right now is a confrontation between him and Gabe. The other night was already enough, and this time he won`t contain himself, and I`m not talking about Gabe.
“Don`t make me call your father” I grab his attention with that comment “If you won`t leave in good terms you will leave in bad ones.”
I deserve a price for threatening him. I've always wanted to do it, accuse him with his father was something I know would work.
“And tell him what? “ His eyes are piercing me and his voice sounds threatening “There is nothing that my father doesn't know about you, what you`ve done and where you come from. I've just come to see you, I haven't even laid a finger on you and that was my mistake, I should have taught you some manners and one of them is to not leave your husband. Do I have to repeat myself?”
In the corner of my eye I can see Duncan. It only takes a helpful glance at him for him to come inside and put Gabe in his place. But no, I`m going to fix this myself.
“Your threats don't work with me anymore. You should stop repeating the same thing over and over again, I was not going to jump into bed with you and your lover. Go and tell your father that.”
The moment I fill myself with the courage to walk past him, Gabe`s hand grabs mine tightly, Duncan is faster that the security guards and separates us.
“If you lay a finger on her again” He sputters “It will be the last time you breathe near her again.”
Duncan`s threat makes Gabe lose his shit and breaks free from the security guards and tries to punch Duncan in the face. His fist stays in the air as Duncan makes a masterful movement and now his punch ends up in Gabe's face.
“Duncan! “ I grab him by the arm “That's enough! Take him away” I order the security guards to take Gabe out of the hospital once and for all. Other security personnel are called and arrive seconds later to intervene.
“I`m afraid they both have to leave the hospital Dra. Miller.”
“Taynor! “ I scream furiously “I'm Dr.Taynor now.”
Duncan grabs my hand.
“She is leaving with me” His order is not disputed.
He holds my hand firmly and I his. Gabe sees the way our fingers intertwine and starts laughing.
“Didn`t I say to get this man out of here? How many people does it take to get this cheater out of my sight?”
“Look at you” He can barely keep his eyes open after that punch in the face he just received “And to think that moments ago I was sure I could win you back.”
“Stop saying stupidities.”
I take Duncan with me as far from Gabe as possible.
“I will end your life” his threat makes me feel a punch in the chest and more so when his threats are directed to Duncan “I will end both your lives. I will find your lover`s weakness and yours...we all have our secrets.“
Now Duncan is the one that makes me move my feet and continue to walk over to his car. He opens the door for me and I get in autopilot without saying a word. He puts my seatbelt on and I can see his face, but he doesn't see mine, he is focused on what he is doing and closes the door.
The engine starts and the car moves. I don't know how he does it, being so calmed after all of that. Although his hands are in the steering wheel they don't show the same thing. His veins are popping and the way he squeezes the steering wheel is a sign that he is angry although he doesn't say it.
“How is your hand?“ I don't know why that is the first thing I ask, instead of thanking him or asking him is he is angry at me too.
“My hand is fine.”
Nothing else to say. I don't open my mouth again during the ride, which is not long. But when I see him making a detour, I look at him angrily. I`m too tired to go for a ride now.
“Where are we going, Duncan?”
“Anywhere but home. He is still going on with that husky and unfriendly tone.”
Again, I`m not saying anything. It's fine by me if he wants to drive all night, I don`t care. But if he brings the worst in me, then he better not start complaining and more so now that he has the right to complaint as well.
“Fine” I start to take off my shoes and then I put them up on the car board.
I finally have his attention when he looks at my feet and then over to my face.
There it is!
He is as good looking as he is stubborn.
“Didn`t they teach you to not put your feet up in a moving car?”
“Moving or not, I don't care. I'm tired, give me a break.”
“I see that you are irresponsible in everything you do” he accuses me.
I snort again and I cross my arms over my chest, putting my freaking feet off the fucking board.
“Stop throwing a tantrum over everything. “
“And you stop being such a tight ass, you take life too seriously. And that is the same as being boring. Tell me, how old are you?”
I wait for his answer but there isn't any.
“Now I remember, you are thirty two, and I`m twenty eight, that makes me four years younger than you, four years in which I can put my feet up a car board if I want to, leave my apartment door open while I make dinner and I can certainly go out for drinks with my friends.”
“But I`ll tell you what you CAN'T do, Duncan. Is get in my business. Gabe is my business, my problem, my mistake, or whatever you want to call it. You punched him and now I have to worry about you even more, because you don't know Gabe, you don't know what he is capable of. Now allow me to get back to enjoy the silence while you drive your fancy car.”
I can also be fragile in my insolence, but I can't admit that to him. I can't tell him that I like him, that making love to him has been the craziest thing I've done and that I wouldn't mind going back in time and living that moment over and over again.
I can't tell him. Because I don't want him getting more involved in my life.
“If I knew you were going to rebel that way, I would have driven straight home” he confesses to me” But the reason that we didn't is that I wouldn't have been hold myself if we took one step inside the building” He looks at me for a second then turns to look at the road, he clears his throat and squeezes the steering wheel again” I would have fucked you right then and there to make you forget the bad moments you've just gone through. And now I want to fuck you to make you stop talking.
There is no need for him to do that in order to silence me. He has left me speechless with what he just said, and it's not the first time. Gladly I would continue talking like a mad woman. Provoke him until he does what he says.
What I`m I saying?!
He smiles mischievously, and loosens the grip on the steering wheel and he surprises me when he takes my hand with his free one. He intertwined his fingers with mine and it feels good to feel that little gesture from him.
He can be a real arrogant son of a bitch, but he is also delicate and chivalrous. The perfect combination of fuel and fire.
And I'm the fuel.
He is the fire.
“We are going home, babe.”
“Thanks.”
&n
bsp; And even though I want to, I can't smile.
CHAPTER
SIXTEEN
He hasn’t released my hand.
And I don't want him to do so, but we must get out of the car. He is the first one to get out and comes to my side to open my door for me. As he did in the beginning, he takes my seatbelt off, and as I`m about to get out of the car with my shoes in my hand, really not caring walking barefoot, Duncan slides a hand in my back and the other below my legs and he lifts me up.
“What are you doing? “ As I finish what I'm saying I'm being carried as if I couldn`t walk by myself.
“You said you were tired” he is walking towards the elevator “I'm being nice to you. A while ago you called me old, but this old man can carry a woman still.
I blush by what he says and my nervous laughter is knotted.”
“I didn't call you old” I remind him “I said you were four years older than me.”
“It`s the same thing” he rolls his eyes.
We get in the elevator and I`m pretty comfortable laying in his chest. He smells so good and I don't mind putting my face in his chest so his scent gets impregnated in me.
“What are you doing? “ He discovers me smelling him “I thought you were tired even for freaky things.”
I find it funny that everything I do is surprising to him. The sentiment is mutual.
The elevator lets us know that we have arrived at our floor. Duncan takes me to my apartment door and places me on the floor.
“I hope you've eaten something” I feel a threat coming “You weight nothing, it would be really easy to snatch you at night.”
“Very funny, Mr. Ford.”
“There it is, sarcasm” I'm sure that he finds that surprising as well “It was taking too long in appearing.”
I shrink my shoulders and get out my key so as to open the door. I wait until he goes to his, and also for him not to go.
“In fact” I stop and turn to face him “I`m not that tired so as to end our conversation from earlier.”
I hope he says something. For him to fight a little and not be as stubborn as me. Now that our conversation is not just about what happened between us, but also what happened with Gabe moments ago. I know he has questions, I can see it in his eyes.